Their Human Errors
by scifiromance
Summary: What if Chakotay had been made aware of Seven's crush on him and didn't think it was as "irrelevant" as she did? C/7. Thanks to battlevalkyrie for giving me the idea.
1. Chapter 1

**A/n: Hello everyone, another new story! It's set around the episode "Human Error". Thanks once again to battlevalkyrie for giving me the idea and beta reading this for me! :)**

Chakotay stared at his Captain in disbelief, glad that they were alone in her Ready Room so that no other crewmember could have heard what she'd just told him. "You're monitoring Seven of Nine's holodeck use?" he echoed, trying to keep the horrified incredulity out of his voice. "_Why _exactly Captain?"

He obviously didn't succeed in neutralising his tone as hurt flashed vividly across Kathryn Janeway's face. "You make it sound as if I'm spying on her, as if I suspect her of something, that's not the case at all." Her eyes took on an accusatory glint, as if it were _he _who'd shown signs of distrusting her protégé and not the other way around.

Chakotay bit back a sigh but kept his expression calm, his tone patient. "You know perfectly well that Seven has earned the trust of all of us several times over, but what did you expect me to say Kathryn? You're going to have to explain this to me, why are you so concerned?" He ran a hand through his hair as Janeway pursed her lips unhappily, "Haven't you and the Doctor always encouraged Seven to experiment in the holodeck, regain her humanity as such?" Chakotay grimaced briefly as he said this; he'd always considered such schemes to be misguided. He didn't doubt the Captain or the Doctor's good intentions in guiding their beloved joint protégé but he'd always believed Seven would grow into her humanity at her own pace, holographic aids or not.

An anxious, regretful frown furrowed the Captain's well manicured brows, "Of course we have, but…" She trailed off, biting down on her lip as she beckoned him to look at the data sprawling across the screen of her desk's console, "Look how many hours she's logged in the holodeck over the past two weeks. I'm surprised she's found any time to work, let alone regenerate!" She took a deep breath, looking up at him seriously, "Hasn't she seemed…distracted to you recently?"

It was Chakotay's turn to appear unsure. "Well…she's been a little late for a few shifts." He admitted, "I've been letting it go because for years she's put even my punctuality to shame." He explained with a hint of a wry smile the Captain didn't return, instead her face fell guiltily.

"I knew I should've kept a closer eye on her…" She murmured, "After her ordeal with Unimatrix Zero…" She clamped her mouth shut, shaking her head at him, but Chakotay already knew not to pry about whatever details Seven had provided about the shattered dream of individual drones. Resting her chin on her hands, Janeway closed her eyes for a moment and sighed heavily, "And then there was Quarra. Some people are still feeling a bit disorientated from that…"

"We've all had a lot to deal with." Chakotay agreed softly, "I wouldn't blame Seven for letting herself take refuge in the holodeck for a little while; it's something we could all do with more often."

The Captain winced. "Taking refuge…" She echoed thoughtfully, "That can be addictive, especially when you've got as many memories to hide from as Seven of Nine does."

Chakotay nodded solemnly, a painful lump forming suddenly in his throat as memories from his short lived mental link with Seven four years ago involuntarily flooded his mind's eye. "Yes, there'd be no point in denying that." He conceded quietly, "But Seven is resilient if she's anything. She's probably just having some fun…"

Janeway's eyebrows immediately formed an incredulous arch on her forehead. "Seven of Nine? Fun? Are we talking about the same former drone?"

Chakotay gave a sharp sigh of acknowledgement in reply, "Captain, it's nothing…"

"Really?" Janeway retorted pointedly, "Reg Barclay had a holodeck addition, what if…"

Chakotay snorted. "Seven isn't exactly Reg Barclay Captain."

"I _realise _that." The Captain answered frostily before shooting him a pained look, "You've already admitted that she's acting strange." She waited for his reluctant nod, "I just need to check…"

Chakotay backed away from her desk, hands defensively in the air. "Wait a minute!" He interrupted, "That's called _spying_ Kathryn." He reminded her heatedly, his dark eyes disapproving.

"What if she _is _in trouble, hurting?" Janeway asked quietly, causing Chakotay to flinch. "Just look in on her for a minute, check she's not doing anything reckless."

Chakotay sat down on the sofa across from her with a heavy sigh. "Captain, I'm going to tell you a story. When my sister was a teenager, my father panicked about her relationship with a certain boy, to the extent where he eventually read her diary. Of course, Sekaya found out and they hardly spoke for a month."

The Captain lowered her eyes, "Did your father find out what he needed to know?"

"He found out he had nothing to worry about but the invasion of privacy scarred his relationship with his daughter." Chakotay replied gently.

Janeway shoot him a knowing glance, saying after a few minutes of silence, "I see your point but the last time you told me a story relating to Seven, the advice was wrong, remember? Do this for me."

* * *

Chakotay stifled a sigh of frustration as he reached the neighbouring sets of doors which each led to one of Voyager's two holodecks. He couldn't believe he was actually doing this; it breeched several unspoken codes of privacy. "Computer, locate Seven of Nine." He ordered, hoping she'd be back in the Cargo Bay or Astrometrics so that he could dismiss the Captain's fears, abandon this altogether and give some sort of believable excuse to the Captain.

The Computer's unruffled reply destroyed those hopes almost instantly. "Seven of Nine is in Holodeck 2."

"Damn." Chakotay muttered under his breath, unable to stop his own concerns beginning to creep in from the back of his mind. It _was_ radically out of character for Seven to neglect her work even slightly, and as far as he knew she'd always been pointedly dismissive of the holodecks before, probably resenting the Doctor's tendency to arrange "social lessons" with staid holograms. He'd always assumed the strict lacing of her Borg upbringing had left her tied tightly to the realms of reality to enjoy the fantasy the holodecks offered, but obviously that wasn't the case now… Now allowing himself a heavy sigh, he entered Holodeck 1, his steps leaden with guilt. He still didn't really understand what the Captain was so afraid of, Seven wouldn't exactly recreate a Borg Cube or anything…would she? He took a second to look resentfully around the dormant, grey panelled room before heading for the console. "Computer, which programme is running in Holodeck 2 right now?" he asked quietly.

"Programme Seven of Nine Beta 3 is currently active on Holodeck 2." The Computer obediently answered.

Chakotay took a deep breath, "Please run a recording of that programme from the beginning with all participants present." He mentally recoiled from watching what she was doing right at this moment, if he could watch this programme from the point of creation, just long enough to see what it was then he could satisfy the Captain without stabbing Seven in the back.

"Unable to comply." The Computer reported, "The designated programme is only accessible to the registered user.

Chakotay gritted his teeth in unease. "Override privacy protocols with Holodeck maintenance algorithm Gamma 4, authorisation Chakotay Alpha 9 Zeta 2."

"Authorisation accepted, replay of programme Seven of Nine Beta 3 activated." The Computer replied obligingly, making Chakotay's heart sink. He'd hoped that Seven would have blocked out even the engineers from her programme with some of those Borg encryption codes she was so famous for, but it appeared not. She wasn't expecting someone to be so intent on spying on her, a small voice in his head reminded him, but he quickly silenced it for the sake of his own relative state of mind. He wouldn't be here for long, as little as a few minutes…

His thoughts stopped mid flow as a crowd of familiar faces materialised on every side of him, a cheery babble was struck up in an instant. The level of recognition he felt blurred his wits with confusion as he had to remind himself these people, Samantha Wildman, Tal Celes, Johnny Shepherd, Chell, were holograms, mere projections of his old friends. In fact, most of the crew seemed to be represented in the replica of the Mess Hall Seven had created for herself. He automatically searched her, but first his eyes fell on B'Elanna, who was as heavily pregnant as the real version, sitting on a sofa under a resplendent "It's a girl!" banner and laughing at something Tom had just whispered in her ear. Intense relief brought a soft smile to his lips, this had really happened! Seven was just repeating actual events, probably as practice. He'd been at the real party and had witnessed Seven's behaviour then. Awkward and stiff, she'd stayed barely five minutes. He recalled the deer in the headlights expression as she'd hurriedly pushed a pair of baby shoes that could apparently withstand 5000 degrees Celsius, of course it had been amusing, but she'd been so obviously uncomfortable that no one had really be cruel enough to tease her. That was the thing about Seven, her heart was genuinely in the right place, which was why even the least patient of crewmembers had learned to tolerate her over the years, but she was rarely able to express it. Maybe she'd realised she'd made a social misstep and was now trying to "correct" her behaviour as it were. Chakotay sighed, his guilt settling down as the logic of this idea sunk in. The Captain wouldn't quibble about that scenario; hopefully he'd be able to convince her to keep her nose out of Seven's personal development for once… Feeling satisfied that Seven was fine, just getting a little wrapped up in things, he called out to the Computer, "Computer, deactivate…" The order died on his suddenly dry lips as he finally spotted Seven. She always stood out in the crowd, but this time it was for a different reason. She looked _completely _human, her implants were gone! He shook his head wryly as he watched her come towards him. Her whole demeanour had entirely changed, her posture was relaxed as she weaved easily among the partygoers, and something that he knew would've normally unsettled her. She even paused to talk to people as she passed, a calm smile frequently crossing her features. Men were following her attentively with their eyes, not that that was particularly unusual, implants or no implants, Seven was a highly attractive woman but here everyone seemed less apprehensive of her. A fitted charcoal polo neck sweater and black trousers had replaced her starkly functional biosuits and her hair had been shaken out from her habitual helmet like bun and pulled back into a soft ponytail at the base of her neck. Chakotay couldn't help but think that if the Doctor had let her wear clothes like that from the beginning it might have lifted her confidence in real life.

The Captain's voice rang loud near his ear, but she was addressing Seven. "Are you enjoying yourself Seven?"

A slightly sheepish smile joined a blush on Seven's face as she replied, "Yes, very much so Captain."

The holographic Captain's smile widened, "Good, I know Tom and B'Elanna will be pleased to hear that."

Seven nodded as she moved to join the Captain beside the galley counter. "I am glad her pregnancy has been progressing well."

"It's a relief." Janeway agreed, "As for you, the Doctor told me that the last of your implants have finally been removed." Seven's head immediately dipped a little, Chakotay was sure he could see guilt in her eyes for a split second as the hologram patted her arm reassuringly, "You're doing great, you look really well."

"Thank you Captain." Seven replied sincerely her expression became nervous, "Captain…the Doctor has informed me that I need no longer regenerate, I can sleep. I was…hoping that I could be allocated…"

"Quarters?" The Captain finished with a grin, laughing when she saw Seven start in surprise and giving the younger woman a small hug. "They're already arranged, you're moving in tomorrow. How does Deck 3 suit you?"

Chakotay felt an unexpected surge of empathy for Seven as she swallowed thickly, overcome. "That would be…wonderful Captain." She murmured gratefully.

"It will be." The Captain said warmly before snatching a brightly wrapped parcel from the counter. "Now, I'd better go and give this to the happy parents-to-be."

"Of course." Seven answered, sighing as the Captain left her, her gaze distant. Chakotay now knew for sure that he'd underestimated the depth of these stimulations. They weren't just social lessons; they were her idealised version of reality brought to life. He studied the room with fresh eyes, this party wasn't the same as the one he and Seven had both really attended. Some of the decorations were different, table positions had been altered. Suspicion grew within Chakotay, Seven would have recreated the real party precisely, she was exacting by nature…

"Computer, when was this programme originally run by Seven of Nine?" he asked the Computer sharply.

"This part of the programme began on Stardate 78547.1 at 1103 hours." The Computer supplied, causing Chakotay to groan as he stalked up to the recording of Seven.

"You ran this programme _before_ the real party…" He whispered, "Why couldn't you let your guard down with us, like you did here?"

Of course, she didn't answer his bemused question, but her lips did form his rank, making him jump. "Commander?" she said nervously.

Chakotay followed her gaze and was shocked to see an _exact _replica of himself smiling warmly at Seven. "Hey, how are you feeling?" The hologram asked, concern evident in his soft voice.

Seven returned the smile instantly, and the real Chakotay stared at her, uncomfortably aware of the shine in her eyes. "I'm fine Commander. The Doctor says I am fully recovered from the last of the operations."

"That's good, you've had to go through a lot." The hologram Chakotay replied, his eyes never leaving her face, which was rapidly taking on the pink tint of a blush under the light of his attention. "It's a huge amount of change for you though…"

Seven gazed up at him, obviously appreciative of his understanding. "It's been a great deal to adapt to in a short time." She admitted softly, "It's been difficult."

The hologram squeezed her shoulder supportively. "You'll be okay, but don't rush yourself." He advised gently. Suddenly his frame stiffened nervously, "So…the Captain said you're moving to new quarters?" he asked, abruptly changing the subject.

Seven was equally embarrassed, "Yes, tomorrow." She answered shakily.

The Chakotay hologram swallowed hard before saying simply, "Call me when you're moving in and I'll come to help."

"I don't think I'll need…" Seven began to splutter but changed her mind, saying instead with a smile, "I will Commander."

"It's Chakotay." He corrected with a grin, catching her happy surprise before being distracted by Tom.

The real Chakotay knew he should leave, make up some lie for the Captain, but his feet were frozen to the floor. One realisation echoed unsettlingly through his mind, his hologram had been _flirting _with her…

**A/n: So, what do you all think so far? PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/n: Thanks to lisac1965 for updating "Finding One's Heart" and to TheFoundersDaughter for updating "Amy". I LOVE these fics! :D**

"Well, it's certainly minimalist…" A hologram of Neelix commented carefully as he looked around Seven of Nine's new quarters. Chakotay, the silent observer in this scene, couldn't help but nod in agreement. Seven certainly hadn't been overly ambitious in the design of her holographic quarters; they were just as empty as any of the unoccupied sets of quarters on the real ship and decorated in the same uniform grey carpets and walls he recognised from his own.

"Yes." Seven agreed, standing proudly in the centre of the room in her new Starfleet uniform, which Chakotay acknowledged she pulled off wearing better than most. She gave the Neelix hologram a flash of a knowing smile, "I am inexperienced in interior decoration, I was hoping you would be able to assist me."

Neelix beamed at her, immediately taking in the space again with the new light of inspiration in his amber eyes. "Of course! You'll need a desk to be able to work comfortably…" He paused to catch Seven's accepting nod, then began to pace the size of the room, "Yes, a good sized table would fit there…" He grinned at his friend infectiously, "Then when you've got the basic furnishings arranged, you can start putting up art and sprinkling around some knick-knacks…"

Seven's brow furrowed questioningly in the way Chakotay had known it would. "Knick-knacks?" she queried inquisitively.

"Oh…" Neelix took a deep breath as he visibly struggled to find a way to explain the concept, "Knick-knacks are things that have sentimental value or they just like to look at. They help personalise a space. Think of the wood carvings in Harry Kim's quarters."

"I have never been in Ensign Kim's quarters." Seven informed him honestly, making Chakotay flinch as he wondered if she'd ever been in _anyone's_ quarters. Did everyone really keep her at such a distance, intentionally or not? He was pulled out of these unsettling thoughts by Seven continuing on thoughtfully, "There is a photograph of my parents' in the ship's database, perhaps I should replicate a copy and frame it…" To Chakotay's ears her voice sounded uncertain and the glance she gave Neelix, almost one of seeking permission, saddened him. He knew Seven's feelings about her parents were complex and he was glad to hear her speak of them affectionately, but her nearly apologetic tone worried him. She was probably too used to the Doctor and the Captain's undercurrent of animosity when the Hansens were brought up, Seven's guardians _hadn't _forgiven them for the assimilation, that she was apprehensive over expressing herself about them.

The Neelix hologram's reply however, to Chakotay's relief, was warm and encouraging. "That's _exactly _what I mean." He told her emphatically before frowning up at the bare walls around them, "You'll need something up on these walls too…"

Seven studied the wall for a moment. "A star chart may be aesthetically pleasing…"

Neelix cringed slightly, "I was thinking of paintings…" He suggested diplomatically.

Seven looked at the Talaxian with an endearing mix of eagerness and incredulity, "A painting of a star chart?"

"Perhaps, but I was thinking more along the lines of injecting some colour. Blue and orange striped rugs would look great in here…" Chakotay let himself chuckle loudly when he saw Seven's dubious expression, she'd certainly programmed Neelix's character to perfection. In fact, when he'd checked with the Computer earlier he'd found that Seven had based her holograms entirely on the crew's real psychological profiles, if he hadn't known he was in the holodeck he knew he wouldn't have been able to tell the difference in anyone but Seven, who was more relaxed here than he'd ever seen her before. On one hand he was pleased she was discovering that part of herself, but on the other he remained upset that she felt she needed the holodeck to do it.

The sudden ring of the doorbell interrupted Chakotay's musings and saved Seven from having to distract Neelix's attention from his more radical décor ideas. "Come in!" Seven called politely.

Chakotay wasn't sure what he found more disconcerting, the actual entrance of his own hologram or the affect his arrival had on Seven, surprised happiness was radiating from her as the hologram spoke with a warm smile, "Hey, I thought I'd come and see how moving day is getting along." He explained, not specifically addressing either Seven or Neelix but with all his focus obviously on the former.

Seven's face was rosy and smiling as met the hologram's gaze. "I think its progressing well, Mr Neelix has been advising me on décor."

"Then you might like this." The Chakotay hologram replied, gently handing her a small round object wrapped in tissue paper. His lips twitched upwards bashfully as she looked up at him questioningly, "It's traditional to bring a gift when visiting someone's new home for the first time." He explained softly.

Seven just gazed up at him in a mesmerised fashion, which made the real Chakotay's heart inexplicably speed up for a moment before Neelix curiously spoke up, "A housewarming gift I think they're called Seven." He prodded her gently on the arm, "Well, open it up!"

"Oh yes, of course." Seven agreed distractedly, a small blush tingeing her cheeks as she carefully unwrapped the parcel, keeping her eyes trained on the task instead of on the giver.

Chakotay instantly recognised what lay in Seven's hands as she discarded the paper, but Neelix did not share his knowledge, "What is it?"

The Chakotay hologram opened his mouth to answer but Seven's own awestruck reply stopped him. "A dreamcatcher. They are hung in order to prevent nightmares." She murmured softly, flushing as if she could not only feel the two holograms surprised eyes on her but also the real Chakotay's burning gaze. "I have taken the liberty of researching your culture Commander." She explained hurriedly, her eyes averted in embarrassment. "It's a beautiful example, thank you."

Holographic Chakotay touched her shoulder reassuringly, "You're welcome." His voice was barely above a murmur.

Neelix cleared his throat and stepped pointedly back from the other two. "Well, I'd better be getting back to the Mess Hall so I'll leave the two alone to hang it up…" He raised a mildly teasing eyebrow at them, "May I suggest above the bed?"

Seven and the other hologram laughed softly in reply but Chakotay felt his chest tighten as his sense of awkwardness and wrong-doing increased. Neelix's tiny innuendo had hit a nerve; he could sense the strong mutual attraction between Seven and…himself. It wafted from them like smoke from a smouldering fire and was proving impossible for him to ignore. "Thank you for your assistance Mr Neelix." Seven told the Talaxian as he departed and then turned back to her Chakotay, bracing up her confidence with a deep breath, "As you are my inaugural guest, I should offer you something…" She began, searching for inspiration, "Tea?"

"Thanks." Chakotay agreed with an indulgent smile, but then pulled her back to face him as she turned away, "You were great at the baby shower. You've come a really long way."

Yes, the real Chakotay thought sadly, if that was real she'd have come an amazingly long way. The same thought seemed to pass through Seven's mind, her lips pressing together guiltily before she summoned up a sincere reply, "Thank you Commander."

"It's Chakotay when we're off duty." He reminded her firmly.

Seven's head gave its characteristic bob even as she smiled at him sweetly but she quickly became stiff with nerves as she built up the courage to respond. "I've been trying to widen my culinary expertise and am going to practice tonight…" The real Chakotay's face unconsciously mirrored the hologram's fond smile at this turn of phrase; he'd never been one who liked to correct her speech in favour of human norms and clichés. "Would you like to attend? I'd appreciate your evaluation…"

Chakotay gently interrupted her shaky explanation, "I'd love to Seven." He assured her before pausing to glance around the empty room, "We might have a little problem though…" He winced guiltily at her instantly stricken face, "You don't have a replicator." He clarified with a chuckle.

Seven's breath hitched in relief before she arched an eyebrow at the empty room. "Another flaw in the décor." She conceded wryly.

The Chakotay hologram laughed. "I'll requisition one for you."

Seven cracked an amused smile, "That would be helpful." She admitted.

"Okay, so you'll get the food and I'll bring the replicator…and the furniture."

Seven giggled at his teasing, and then fell serious again, "1900 hours?"

"It's a date." He confirmed warmly with a wide grin as he left.

The word "date" hit the flesh and blood Chakotay like a kick to the chest, although the rational part of him had know it was coming, his logic had been deadened by shock as he tried to sort through the tumult of emotions. He had to admit that he was flattered, and relieved, more than anything else. The relief stemmed from the fact that he'd always feared that Seven had never forgiven him for his attempt on her life while she'd still been a drone or his invasion into her mind to free her from the Collective. Really they had a lot of difficult history; it was strangely a weight off his shoulders to know that she was attracted to him rather than afraid of him, awkward though it was proving to be. He found himself swallowing hard as he looked at Seven standing alone in the room, holding the dreamcatcher dreamily. They were both digging themselves into quite the hole by doing what they were doing, much deeper than he'd anticipated…

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D I've been amazed by the response to this story so far, thanks everyone! :) **


	3. Chapter 3

"Computer, how long have I been running this recording?" Chakotay grimaced as he heard the hoarseness of exhaustion in his voice.

"16 hours and 33 minutes." The Computer answered unconcernedly.

Chakotay's loud exhale of surprise and disbelief whistled through his tightly clenched teeth as he rubbed his itching eyes to stare resignedly around the projection of Seven of Nine's imaginary quarters where he sat on the sofa and again considered what the hell he was doing there. He'd seen enough of Seven's simulations to know that he'd have to lie to the Captain just to cover what he'd already witnessed, so why was he embroiling himself even further by continuing to sit here? Yes, he had to reluctantly agree with the voice in his head, which had been growing louder by the hour, that it was a curious fascination with Seven's fantasy that kept him here, a realisation which made him ashamed of himself and embarrassed for her. Even more uncomfortably, he had started to wonder if that would've been the case if the object of her fantasy had been anyone but him…

Seven's voice led him away from his thoughts, bringing his attention from himself and back to her as she announced, "Computer, implement designated changes to programme Seven of Nine Beta 3." Chakotay barely had time to blink before the uniform Seven had been wearing was replaced by a dress, and, his mind couldn't help but focus on, a revealing red dress at that. Now, Chakotay had always been aware of his attraction to Seven, he didn't think there was a man on the ship who didn't at least admire her occasionally, it was human nature after all, but this was a different kettle of fish. Even the shock his senses had received when he'd first seen her after being restored by the Doctor didn't compare to the surge running through him right now. Seven didn't help by walking right past him to stand in front of the full-length mirror that had appeared in the programme along with Seven's costume change. He stood up to be able to see her face, hastily wiping his palms on his trousers as he did so, and was struck by how ill-at-ease she looked. His mother had once jokingly told him that what a woman saw of herself in the mirror was the opposite of what a man would see, but Seven took this to an extreme. Instead of the confidence the screen siren like ensemble should have been inspiring, apprehension was all that was exuded by Seven's face and posture as she pulled at the dress' slender shoulder straps and tugged at the straight hem which barely brushed her knees. Chakotay was beside her as she, after obviously internally disciplining her behaviour, straightened her back as if it were an unbending steel rod and inhaled a deep strengthening breath Chakotay found himself taking with her. She then swiftly loosened the golden helmet of a hairdo she worn without variation everyday he'd worked with her, and let the surprisingly long locks fall over her shoulders and down her back. Chakotay had never noticed before that her hair had a definite wave to it, curling softly at the ends in a way that seemed to him to be at odds with her unyielding self-control. Even now he could practically hear the Borg Queen's taunts and reproaches that were, judging from her uncertain expression and bitten lip, most likely running through her mind. The thought of that aggravated him enough on her behalf to almost put an encouraging hand on her shoulder before he remembered she wasn't really there, not on this holodeck anyway.

"You look perfect." The soft words of his hologram made Chakotay as well as Seven jump; although Chakotay caught a shy flush of pleasure fill Seven's cheeks in the mirror before she quickly spun around to face the hologram.

"You're early…" She greeted shakily, smiling broadly but with her gaze averted as if she were afraid he'd retract the compliment if she looked at him fully. This made her observer wonder how unused she was to compliments, surely one of her professed at admirers had given her as little as a simple compliment at some point? Although, with Harry's nerves and the Doctor's hyperbolic tendencies he sadly supposed it was very possible…

"I didn't want to wait." The hologram explained honestly, dragging his gaze away from his date to glance around the room, smiling at the sight of the newly installed replicator, "I see you got the replicator." He held the bottle of wine in his hands out to her, "I brought the wine with me, just in case."

"Please do the honours." Seven replied with a warm smile as she left his side to bring them two wine glasses from her small kitchenette.

"Right." The Chakotay hologram agreed easily before trying to uncork the bottle with considerably more difficulty. "We didn't have to pass an uncorking class at the Academy…" He joked good-naturedly as Seven watched his struggles in amusement.

Seven's eyebrow arched aloft. "Will you require a phaser Commander?" she teased.

He chuckled, "Maybe…" He replied before giving the cork one last tug, sharing a triumphant grin with Seven as the bottle opened with a satisfying pop. He glanced up at the room's speaks, which were playing a gentle piece of classical piano. "Liszt?"

"Chopin." The real Chakotay automatically corrected from behind him, rather peevishly.

Seven echoed the correction, although in a much pleasanter tone than her observer, "Chopin. I was introduced to classical piano some months ago."

Both Chakotays looked at her in interest, although it was of course the hologram who asked, "You play?"

Seven nodded, "The Doctor has been instructing me." She answered modestly, "I enjoy it."

The hologram beamed at her, "That's great!" He then looked at her more gently, "I'd love to hear you play."

Seven looked up at him, a flattered smile pulling at her lips. "Then you shall, although perhaps another time, dinner is almost ready."

"What are we having?" the hologram asked warmly, following her into the kitchenette with the real Chakotay shadowing his steps.

Seven took a deep breath as she assessed the process of her two courses on the small stove. "Braised leeks for the starter and chicken supreme for the primary course."

Holographic Chakotay licked his lips appreciatively as he leaned over her shoulder, a movement the real Chakotay saw made her gasp slightly. "And for dessert?" he pressed with a smile.

Seven lifted an eyebrow, eyes twinkling. "Dessert will be a surprise." Chakotay felt an involuntary shiver go over him at her low tone and his hologram was openly pleased as he plucked a spoon of stew from the bubbling pot to taste. "Does it require more sodium chloride?" Seven asked him worriedly.

The hologram paused thoughtfully, "0.6 milligrams." He reported, a teasing glint in his eye.

Seven smirked at that but still seriously tasted her meal. "You're right, more salt." She agreed quietly, adding a pinch before setting to chopping more leeks, a task the hologram quickly moved forward to help her with, although the real Chakotay noted that he was more intent on watching Seven chop than doing his own.

"You look beautiful when you're chopping." He murmured near her ear after a couple of minutes of comfortable silence. When Seven couldn't quite suppress a smile in response to that, he grinned from ear to ear. "It's true and you know it, you're smiling…"

Seven looked up at him defiantly, "That was not a smile, it was a smirk." She informed him. The real Chakotay could hear the humour behind this remark and obviously so could the hologram.

"I'll check the internal sensors to confirm that it was a _smile_." He challenged stubbornly, still grinning at her. It was Seven who gave in first, starting to laugh and stepping away from her preparations. The hologram followed her, standing close to her as he said seriously, "At the risk of sounding like a cheesy holonovel…" The real Chakotay saw a tiny flinch pass over Seven's face as he said that, "…you really do have the most beautiful smile I've ever seen."

That smile was barely evident as Seven's face leaned closer to his, her expression absorbed and her throat swallowing convulsively, "You have a very intriguing facial structure…" She murmured softly.

The real Chakotay felt the blood rush to his face even faster. He'd already backed off when he'd felt the tension in the room begin to spark as well as sizzle, but now he was pretty sure that Seven, in her unique way, had called a hologram of him handsome. The hologram was obviously even more certain as he put his hands on her shoulders and replied huskily, "I'll take that as a compliment." Seven had only just begun a small nod when he pressed his lips firmly to hers, his hands moving down to her waist as she returned the kiss.

In reality the kiss lasted only for a few seconds, although to Chakotay, whose sinking gut was twisting into confused knots it seemed much longer before a flushed Seven pulled back, putting her hands on the hologram chest to steady herself. "I require more practice…" She blushed red as the connotations of this remark hit home but the Chakotay hologram just smiled at her fondly, tilting her face upwards again with his hand. Seven obliged him with a soft smile and a second kiss.

Despite his mounting discomfort, it almost crushed him, Chakotay was fixated on them and therefore saw the shot of sharp pain which flooded Seven's face as if she had been stung. A gasp left her lips as the hologram, who must felt her tense, broke the kiss to peer at her anxiously. "What's wrong?" he whispered in concern.

Seven blinked painfully, looking dazed and bemused for a few seconds, before she forced the lingering wince from her face. "Nothing." She murmured reassuringly, but as she leaned in to kiss her hologram again, Chakotay believed she was lying.

* * *

Thankfully for Chakotay's sense of reality, the hologram pushed for nothing more than a few relatively chaste kisses after that, the heat of that first moment had dissipated for now. They had eaten their meal before he guided her to sit with him on the sofa. "You look tired."

"I suppose I haven't gotten used to my lack of regenerating." Seven agreed quietly. Chakotay, sitting directly across from their sofa on a chair, saw for the first time that Seven was pale from lack of rest, dark shadows beginning to blotch her eyes. The Captain had been right about her neglecting her alcove in favour of the holodeck at least, probably the reason for her headache.

"Sleeping has its merits too, I promise." The hologram assured her, gently using the arm he had around her waist to guide her head onto his shoulder. "So, what were these piano lessons with the Doctor like exactly?" he asked as she cuddled into his side.

Seven laughed sleepily, "Some of his teaching methods could be described as unconventional." She admitted.

"Oh, I'm sure." Her hologram replied, not speaking again as Seven gave into badly needed sleep.

Both Chakotays watched in silence as she slept. The real man hadn't even been entirely sure before this if her implants _allowed_ her to sleep. He now saw that she could have nightmares too, she occasionally jumped and whimpered a Borg term, making both men wince. The hologram soon carefully manoeuvred her from his shoulder to lie out on the sofa, biting his lip as she cried out briefly. "You're okay honey, relax…" He whispered to her unhappily, finally lying down beside her and putting a gentle arm around her in an effort to offer comfort. Chakotay saw that it worked somewhat, Seven soon quietened as her hologram joined her in sleep.

He wasn't sure how long he sat there watching them, thinking. Seeing them like this had given him some perspective. If Seven had merely wanted some lustful fantasy, with men romancing her passionately, she certainly wouldn't be the first on board, everyone got lonely and had needs, including the Captain and himself, but that wasn't what this was. He saw now that her loneliness ran deeper, she was starved of attention as well as affection, of any intimacy whatsoever. He wasn't about to say she was blameless in that, she pushed people away on a daily basis, but after her traumatic existence, for it couldn't fairly be called a life, what else was she able to do? He was amazed that she had been able to let go this much, although he knew with a sad certainty that it would trap her in a situation where rather than face her fears she'd hide in this pleasant dream world instead. He sighed heavily and put his head in his hands, only raising it when he heard Seven shift again, back in the grasp of her demons. "Don't do this to yourself…" He pleaded in a whisper, "I'd help you, everyone would help you make reality a little more like this if you'd just_ try_…"

Her eyes shot open as if she'd heard him, but of course it was only her disturbed dreams jolting her awake, breathing hard. She didn't get time to recover as her comm. badge beeped, "Seven of Nine, report to Astrometrics." Chakotay grimaced as he recognised his own words from the morning before. Part of the reason he'd agreed to do this for the Captain was that he'd witnessed her acting even more standoffish than normal, he couldn't believe that had only been yesterday.

Seven's breath caught. "I'm…on my way Commander!" she answered hurriedly, immediately beginning to scramble up from the sofa.

The Chakotay hologram woke then, sleepily pulling her close for another moment. "Good morning." He murmured contentedly.

A horrified grimace crossed Seven's face, as if it had dawned on her just how complicated her situation was, and how tangled her emotions were. Chakotay's chest tightened as a mask of deep guilt and intense self-hatred settled on her face. She stood up, "Computer, deactivate programme." She ordered through gritted teeth and the world she'd created instantly evaporated like the mirage it was. She stood in the grey panelled room, again donning her biosuit with her implants scarring her skin. The only trace of where she'd been was that her hair still lay loose on her slumped shoulders but she eliminated that by sharply sweeping it back up and retreating from the room without looking back.

The Computer's voice broke through Chakotay's frozen thoughts. "Do you wish to see the recording of the programme's next activation?"

"No…" Chakotay ground out, "That's enough."

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/n: Thanks everyone for all the support for "The Borg With Butterfly Wings", I really appreciate it. I hope you all like this chapter too. :)**

Chakotay stumbled awkwardly out of Holodeck 1, grimacing as his strained, exhausted eyes made the hallway swim in front of him. Blinking as he tried to regain his bearings, he glanced back at the neighbouring door of Holodeck 2, his frown deepening as the wall console indicated it was activated and occupied; he didn't need to ask the Computer to know who by. "Damn it Seven…" He groaned under his breath before quickly reproaching himself for his resentful tone. It hadn't been Seven's choice to involve him in this, she didn't even know. That thought added more guilt to the volatile mix of confusing, contradictory emotions that were swirling around his brain. Sinking against the wall with a heavy sigh, he tried to resign himself to, and then accept, what he was experiencing, unconsciously grinding his teeth as he did so. It wasn't as if he could do anything, he reasoned, but that brought him scant comfort, in fact it made his stomach churn further. He ran a stressed hand through his dishevelled hair and over his face, which was by now rough with stubble. He doubted he looked very much like the exemplary First Officer he strived to be right now. Before he even tried to sort through his options about what he should do about Seven, if anything, he needed a cold shower, a shave and a couple of hours sleep…

"Chakotay? Are you okay?" B'Elanna Torres' familiar voice dragged him out of his muddled thoughts and he looked up to see that his old friend had stopped in the hallway to peer at him in concern.

He smiled at her apologetically, "I'm fine, just a little…tired." He told her quietly.

Doubt flashed through B'Elanna's perceptive dark eyes for a split second before she nodded. "I can believe that, this alien minefield has been giving us quite a run for our money."

Chakotay cast a worried glance over her ever growing baby bump and visibly swollen ankles. "How have you been coping with the repairs?" Fresh guilt prickled at him as he realised how much the Captain's fool errand had cut him out of the loop as to the ship's situation and he sighed again.

"We're holding up fine, as long as we're not hit again." B'Elanna replied with a rueful twitch of her lips. "I'm on my way to the Bridge to update the Captain right now."

"I'd like to hear that update if you don't mind." Chakotay suggested. B'Elanna nodded easily and they fell into step companionably. By the time they entered the turbolift B'Elanna had given him a condensed run through of the situation down in Engineering but his mind had already drifted to his central preoccupation, "Has Seven been assisting you?" he asked, awkwardly clearing his throat.

B'Elanna shot him a questioning look at his nervous tone and pensive expression as she shrugged nonchalantly, "Not really, she's been dealing with the detection of the alien defences more than anything." She chuckled wryly, "If she'd been interfering too much you'd have been the first to hear my objections."

Chakotay winced in disappointment despite his efforts to remain impassive. He'd hoped that Seven hadn't been spending as much time in the holodeck as he suspected, that his full day of watching the recordings had given him a distorted picture… He saw B'Elanna's raised eyebrows and forced out the laugh that was expected, "Yeah, I guess I would've heard if she'd been causing trouble."

B'Elanna's brows knitted as she heard a note of regret, even sadness in his words but she was still perplexed as to the source of his distraction. "Seven _did _do something a little odd yesterday though…" She mused thoughtfully.

Chakotay's gaze immediately fixated on hers. She'd gained his attention…somehow. "What did she do?"

Surprised up his sudden intensity, she stepped back slightly as she answered, "She came down to Engineering specificallyto _apologise_ for bailing on my baby shower."

Chakotay's lips twitched upwards at her incredulous tone, as if he'd been let in on a secret she was unaware of, as he peered at her curiously, "And did you object to that?" he asked softly.

"Well…" B'Elanna swallowed, suddenly worried that she had been unfair to the ex-drone by expressing her shock, "Of course not, it's just pretty unlike Seven to apologise for anything, let alone missing a social event. Even Neelix is resigned to the fact that she avoids socialising."

Chakotay smiled, although B'Elanna could see more than a tinge of sadness in it. "Maybe she's coming around to the idea."

"Maybe." B'Elanna conceded doubtfully as the turbolift rapidly climbed towards the Bridge. "Even stranger than apologising, she asked me how I do my hair…"

"What did you say?" Chakotay asked as the turbolift drew to a halt.

"Just a sonic shower and some engine grease." B'Elanna replied with a sheepish chuckle as she stepped out onto the Bridge.

She definitely didn't use the engine grease, Chakotay thought wryly as the image of Seven last night, with her hair hanging loose over that red dress, popped into his head, unbidden but vivid. The anecdote actually settled his nerves, he found that he was relieved, even a little proud, that Seven was trying out some of her social skills in real life as well as within her holographic comfort zone. It reassured him about telling the Captain that was fine and should be left alone.

He was jerked out of his thoughts by the Captain's strident voice as she turned away from B'Elanna to face him, "I'll see you in my Ready Room Commander." She glanced at him just long enough to catch his obedient but apprehensive nod as she swept past him and strode into her Ready Room.

His heavy sigh as he followed her in was loud enough for several members of the current Bridge shift to look at him questioningly before exchanging curious glances. Thankfully, they waited until he was safely behind the Ready Room's doors before they started speculating about what was wrong, or more precisely, what their First Officer had done.

Captain Janeway didn't beat around the bush, not even pausing to replicate her requisite cup of insomnia-inducing black coffee before confronting her second-in-command, "Well? Did you find out what Seven's doing sequestered in those holodecks?" Chakotay took a deep breath to steel himself for answering but the Captain didn't pause long enough to let him. Snatching a PADD up from her desk, she pressed it impatiently into his hands, "Look, it's getting worse, 49 hours of holodeck time in six days…"

Chakotay put a quietening hand on Janeway's arm as he put the PADD down without even pretending to read it, he knew what it would say. "Kathryn, she's fine. The holodeck isn't doing her any harm, not at all…"

Janeway's eyes narrowed at his placatory tone, her anger sparked. "You're not going to tell me what you saw her doing are you?" she asked incredulously.

"No." Chakotay answered honestly, meeting her eyes apologetically but otherwise unrepentant. "It's private, I'd be breeching more of Seven's trust than I already have. You need to trust me _and _Seven, I know she's fine and not doing anything wrong."

Janeway ran a frustrated hand through her auburn hair and began to pace, now glaring at Chakotay. "I _do_ trust Seven, that's not what this is about, you know that." She snapped harshly, "Aren't I allowed to be concerned when she abandons her duties, her beloved routine, to lock herself away on the holodeck?"

Chakotay couldn't bite back his irritation as she refused to listen to him. All of the frustration and confusion he felt over this situation, the resentment he felt towards Janeway for putting him in this position, exploded from him. "She's not an android to be programmed Captain! She's a young woman who's allowed to make her own decisions, mistakes if that's the case." Thoughts that had subconsciously mulled over for years began spilling out from his mouth uncensored, "You have to remember that you're her Captain, not her mother…"

He stopped as he saw the Captain's face drain to white in anger, her offence obvious as her eyes blazed with hurt. "I have _never_ treated Seven as anything less than a human individual." She stated stiffly, pausing as her hurt changed to spite, "I can't say the same for you Commander."

Chakotay inhaled sharply as her words hit a nerve made even rawer than usual by his recent experiences, his initial distrust, no, even hatred, of Seven of Nine had been a source of intense guilt for a long time. "No…" He conceded thickly, swallowing down the violent retort which had first sprang to his lips with difficulty. He _had_ provoked her first after all. "Listen, you know Seven better than I do, so you know that even if she is…distracted right now she wouldn't neglect her duties, right?"

The Captain sighed thoughtfully before opening her mouth to reply but the ship's sudden and violent roll dragged a shocked gasp from her lips instead. Tom's voice immediately filled the Ready Room through the comm. system, "Sorry Captain, we had to move pretty quick to avoid that shot and I'm not getting any help from Astrometrics."

Janeway's eyebrows shot up in Chakotay's direction, "Do you still believe it isn't affecting her duties?" she muttered as rushed past him back to the Bridge.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D This was the most difficult chapter to write yet, I hope you still like it. It's also shorter than I intended because I need to get ready for going on holiday tomorrow until Friday. If anybody updates anything, I'll review when I come back. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

Seven of Nine's quarters, safe and secluded on the holodeck, echoed with the soothing sounds of classical music as the notes came chanting from the elegant piano in the corner, accompanied as always by the reassuringly regular pacing beat of the metronome placed atop the instrument. The player herself did not have her full attention on the music however. She knew this particular piece by heart and therefore let her eyes follow the changing expressions of her companion rather than the unchanging notes of the sheet music in front of her. She'd always played for the sake of the music itself, never having had the chance to witness its effect on others, the Doctor's first concern was always on instruction rather than appreciation, but it was different now. Chakotay's face altered with every note, bringing a new facet of attractiveness to his face each time, and she couldn't help but feel relieved that she'd allowed herself the pleasure of playing for him. If you're going to let yourself feel for a hologram, she berated herself mentally for an instant, you may as well hone your skills while you're with it. This dark thought made her chest tighten for a moment, the self-criticism made worse by the fact that somehow the thought sounded in her mind like a disappointed Captain Janeway, but she quickly distracted herself by refocusing on the music, seeking out the beat of the metronome to guide her until she'd finished. She noted with relief and affection that the Chakotay hologram hadn't noticed her tiny pause and was gazing at her, mesmerised, as her hands slid from the keys onto her lap. "What did you think?" she asked softly, studying him intently.

Chakotay's answer was expressed in the delightedly surprised grin he gave her, but he spoke anyway, "You were amazing." He told her with honest warmth, laughing in wonderment, "I was expecting "Chopsticks"; I had no idea you this good!" He raised a teasing eyebrow, "I'm surprised the Doctor hasn't already secured you for one of his monthly recitals."

Seven smirked even through her flattered blush, "He has suggested it to me more than once." She admitted.

"Well maybe you should take him up on it, I'd certainly be there." Chakotay replied with a sincere smile.

"Perhaps I will consider the matter again." Seven conceded as she shifted on the piano's seat to offer him more room. "It's your turn."

Chakotay sighed regretfully, "Unfortunately, I don't play." He told her apologetically, "But I'd love to hear _you_ play again." He paused to flick through the music books Seven had arranged around the piano and quickly found what he was looking for, showing her the page, "This is one of my favourites."

The reminder that she could programme him to play as many instruments as she liked flashed through the more detached areas of Seven's mind, but she dismissed the idea with a shudder. Instead she obligingly took the book from him and set it open in front of her, smiling when she recognised it as one she also liked a great deal. "As you wish." She agreed easily, restarting the metronome with a flick of her hand before letting her fingers begin their dance over the keys. She was just beginning to relax into it, her ears savouring the sounds, when Chakotay laid a hand lightly over one of hers. She stopped immediately, shooting him a bemused look, "Is something wrong?"

His face softened when he heard the apprehension in her tone. "No...but I want to hear you _play_ the music." He shook his head slightly as further confusion clouded her features, deepening her frown, and closed the small gap between them, taking both of her hands firmly in hers. "Your technique is flawless, but you're not playing." He tried to explain before elaborating with a soft sigh as she stared at him uncomprehendingly, pointing to the metronome in front of them. "You're not letting your emotions into the music. Remember when you used to deny yourself your emotions?" Seven flinched and looked down unhappily; he had no idea how true that still was… He squeezed her hands supportively as he continued, "The metronome gives you a sense of order, but it also stops you from truly accessing your emotions." Seven swallowed as she nodded slowly, she found that she couldn't really deny his conclusions. "Okay then." He murmured softly, lifting her chin up with one hand as he set the now silent metronome aside with the other.

Seven took that as a request to try again but found that her hands were shaking as they returned to the piano. "Yes…" She whispered apprehensively, gulping hard as she plunged back into the music.

"What are you feeling?" Chakotay pressed emphatically beside her.

Seven cringed as she hit a wrong note. In her haste she seemed to have lost all control of speed or volume, it was barely recognisable as the same tune. "My tempo is erratic…" She muttered in reply through gritted teeth.

"Not what you're thinking, what you're _feeling_!" Chakotay corrected, exasperation creeping into his tone, "Don't worry about the notes, just play and tell me what you feel."

Seven took a deep breath, her hands now ramming into the keys in an extremely unprofessional manner. She was surprised by how frightened this request left her and panic at being so out of control choked her for a moment before she began to answer, "I feel…apprehension, anxiety…fear…" Suddenly something inside her snapped and she stopped playing with a very unmelodic clang. "I can't." She whispered brokenly, drawing back from the piano as if it would bite her.

"Yes, you _can_." Chakotay reassured her resolutely as he took hold of her shoulders firmly, rubbing rhythmical circles into her tense muscles with his thumbs as he looked directly into her gaze. "It doesn't have to be perfect!"

Seven stiffened as she felt hot tears burn in her eyes and blinked furiously to hold them back. His words didn't bring the intended comfort; they were just as hollow as the man holding her tightly. The pursuit of perfection was the closest equivalent to a religion within the Collective, and although the Voyager crew did not place such a quasi-religious significance on it, she knew it was _expected_. What else did she have to offer the crew except her perfectionism? They relied on her to strive for it as no one else could in their long, dangerous journey to the Alpha Quadrant, to offer solutions and explanations. That was her value to the crew, only this hologram didn't need that…

A violent jolt shoved these relentless thoughts aside. Her Chakotay hologram reacted first, "What was that?"

Seven hurriedly stood up, but before she could react further the Captain's overwrought, irate voice assaulted her over the comm. system, "Seven of Nine, report to Astrometrics, _now_!"

Seven felt her mind freeze in horror for a split second as she thought of the minefield. "I'm on my way Captain!" she almost shouted in reply, casting a pained glance back at the confused looking hologram before hastily commanding, "Computer, deactivate programme!" The effect was instantaneous, the worried face of the Chakotay hologram evaporated along with the room and her human appearance. She winced upon seeing her wide blue eyes staring back at her, one capped with her familiar optical implant, from the reflective surface of the holodeck walls but as she became aware of the wail of the red alert siren she forgot other, irrelevant, concerns and transported herself to Astrometrics.

* * *

Even with the help of the transporter, as she arrived in Astrometrics, Seven's gut twisted sickeningly with the thought that she might be too late. Glaring frantically at the console in front of her, she tried to sort out what was happening. The sensors were in uproar, unable to accurately pinpoint the danger while being bombarded by data she'd neglected to block out earlier. "Got any coordinates for me Seven?" Tom asked down the comm. line, his normally confident voice marred with desperation.

"Yes!" Seven replied hurriedly, her mind gripping hold of the first set of coherent coordinates the sensors gave out. "Starboard 879.01 mark…" She stopped with a gasp as she finished her promised medications and realised her error, "No, Starboard 657.09 mark 2." She corrected breathlessly.

The ship gave a hard lurch as Tom obeyed, and by the lack of explosion Seven gathered that they must've missed the mine. "Thanks Seven." Tom told her with gratitude that made Seven grimace as she looked up at the readings on the viewscreen. She'd barely avoided the destruction of the entire ship! If she hadn't been so negligent in her duties, so distracted by her attempts at a "personal life", she could have given the crew fair warning as she'd promised… The guilt that had been gradually seeping into her with each new holographic experiment briefly overwhelmed her along with relief for their escape and she lurched forward, bending over the console as her breath left her in short gasps. Her hair, still loose from the holodeck, hung over her troubled face like a curtain before the beep of her comm. badge made her straighten up hurriedly.

"Seven, report to my Ready Room." The Captain ordered sharply.

Seven bowed her head even though the Captain couldn't see her. "Yes Captain." She agreed submissively.

* * *

She walked onto the Bridge, having restored her usual appearance, to find her crewmates either openly staring at her or surreptitiously avoiding her gaze altogether. The one main exception to this rule, disconcertingly, was Commander Chakotay, who looked at her levelly in understanding as he stepped out of the Ready Room before rapidly turning his attention to the viewscreen. If she'd been more confident of her ability to read him, she would've thought she saw sympathy in his face too, his Adam's apple moving up and down as he swallowed unhappily, but she dismissed the idea as she entered the Ready Room. He was the last person who owed her empathy after what she'd done!

The Captain stopped her intemperate pacing as soon as she locked eyes with Seven. "Well, do you want to explain what just happened?" she asked without greeting her, her quiet tone deceptive.

Seven bit the inside of her mouth as she struggled, given the turmoil she was experiencing, to stand her ground in the face of the imminent interrogation. Normally she could withstand any questions about her conduct with relatively unruffled ease, she was generally certain of the rightness, or at least the inevitability, of any course of action she took. The Captain frequently didn't agree with her analysis of course, but she could still defend her convictions calmly. This case was different, she was _very _aware of her wrongdoing, and how close Voyager had come to destruction. "The sensor modifications…took longer than I anticipated." She said quietly, knowing the Captain expected some sort of explanation, whether completely true or not.

The Captain's eyebrow arched menacingly, her eyes narrow. "They might have proceeded more quickly if you'd stayed at your post." She remarked coldly, her voice dripping with condemnation.

Seven flinched as the pointed, but justified, comment hit home but her self-defensive mechanisms still kicked in out of habit. "I did not realise I was confined to Astrometrics." She retorted.

The Captain stared at her as if she didn't know who she was. "You were on _duty_."

The judgemental anger didn't hit Seven as hard as the obvious disappointment in those words, which cracked her fragile façade of composure. "Yes…" She admitted with genuine remorse, "I was…distracted and was deeply negligent of my duties, endangering the ship in the process." She forced herself to meet Janeway's eyes, "It will not happen again Captain."

The Captain's demeanour softened a fraction, the obvious sincerity in Seven's apology mollifying her slightly. "Sit down Seven."

Seven gave the Captain a startled look. The older woman knew she rarely sat in formal situations, preferring, perhaps by some flight complex, to stand, but Janeway again indicated the chair on the other side of her desk so Seven obediently sat down across from her. "I presume this distraction is on the holodecks, since you've logged…" The Captain paused to glance at a PADD, "17 hours in the last three days alone." She leaned back in her chair with an uptight sigh, "Mind telling me what you're doing with all that time?"

Seven's hands clenched in her lap. "I've been conducting…research."

The Captain's lips pursed, "It must be fascinating, what does it involve exactly?"

"I've been…working on a way to significantly increase the warp engine's capacity." Seven explained. It wasn't a lie exactly, she _had_ been pursuing such research intermittently for years.

"Sounds promising." The Captain conceded, although Seven could tell she'd seen through the deception as she shifted irritably. "I'd love to see your ideas sometime Seven, but you can't neglect your duties either."

"I know Captain, I don't intend to." Seven murmured.

"Good, dismissed." The Captain told her quietly, waiting until her protégé had turned to leave before adding, "We all make mistakes Seven, remember that."

Seven flinched guiltily but didn't respond. She was hurt by the judgement in the Captain's tone but remained silent as she left as quickly as her legs would carry her.

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/n: I know everyone was having problems with their alerts when I posted a chapter of "Listen to Your Heart" on Thursday night, hopefully the system will be working for this chapter. I hope you all enjoy! :)**

"I've brought the report from Engineering you requested Commander." Tal Celes said quietly as she reached Chakotay's chair, but the normally attentive man she knew appeared to be completely lost in his own thoughts and she was loath to intervene. She shifted the PADD she was holding apprehensively in her hands as she awaited a response, even after almost seven years being on the Bridge still intimidated her. Finally, she placed a cautious hand lightly on Chakotay's arm. "Commander? Are you alright? I can come back later…"

Chakotay jumped slightly at her touch, pulled back to awareness of where he was. He turned in his chair to give a nervous Celes an apologetic smile, "I'm sorry Celes…" He took the PADD from her then ran a tired hand through his hair, "I'm just a little…distracted today." Against his will, his eyes automatically moved to the source of that distraction, the doors of the Ready Room that Seven of Nine had entered a matter of minutes ago with the Captain.

"It's okay Commander…" Celes mumbled shyly, resisting a curious urge to follow the direction of his gaze. "Even the Prophets get distracted sometimes."

"Yeah, I guess we all do." Chakotay agreed, a little too quickly. He was just about to force himself to tear his attention away from the door when his patience was rewarded. Seven strode out of the room and across the Bridge as she had many times before, but he felt his jaw clenching involuntarily as he watched her head for the turbolift a little too fast, her eyes downcast and her shoulders hunched over, as if she wanted to curl in on herself. He knew, at least partially, what she had just faced, had expected this in a way, but her reactions still unnerved him even as she disappeared from the Bridge on the turbolift. Even after the most contentious of arguments, and Seven had had them with most of the crew at some point including himself, he'd never seen her looking so _defeated _before. She always exuded some form of confidence, or perhaps given what he'd seen of her the past few days it was defiance, that had enabled her to stare her detractors down and maintain an impassive, detached stance that Tuvok would be proud of. Now though, that unshakable impassivity had gone. Her expression was still unreadable, he couldn't pinpoint any particular emotion on her face, but for once he knew for a fact they were there, storming under the surface. He sighed audibly at his own train of thought, maybe he was reading too much into all this…

"I wonder what she's done now?" Chakotay heard Ensign Calderon, at the comm. since Tom had left for his night off, mutter loudly to his friend Crewman Jackson.

"Well, just then with the mines was a near miss." Jackson speculated, "But I heard she was doing some weird Borg project on the holodeck and nearly blew up Deck Six…"

Chakotay had had enough even before the mention of the holodecks but now he began to lose his temper. "Does this conversation have anything to do with the duties I've assigned either of you?" he asked sharply, his tone unexpectedly heated. Both crewmembers immediately fell silent, shell-shocked by the force of their Commander's disapproval. "Good." Chakotay told them tersely, standing up hurriedly as he saw the Captain re-enter the Bridge out of the corner of his eye, looking just as grim as Seven. He headed over to her impulsively when she pointedly avoided him, "What did you say to her?" he asked, hopefully out of earshot of this gossipy Bridge shift. He was surprised by the accusatory tinge to his own question, Seven _had_ most certainly been in the wrong this time by neglecting her duties after all.

The Captain didn't seem to pick up on it though as she heaved a dissatisfied sigh. "I just told her not to neglect her duties again." She answered shortly before continuing, "I just don't get it this time Chakotay." She admitted, her unease evident. "God knows I've gotten used to people lying to me about their indiscretions over the years…" At these words she shot him a coldly pointed glance which in an instant told Chakotay that Seven hadn't told the Captain anything, and in turn that Janeway half-blamed him for the current situation. "I just never thought I'd need to go through the lecture about _duty_ with Seven of Nine…" The Captain confided disbelievingly as she regarded Chakotay again, "That's the one concept of humanity I always thought she understood from the beginning." Sadness and apprehension flicked briefly over the Captain's controlled features, "It makes me doubt if anything we teach her really gets through that Borg armour in the end."

Words sprang to Chakotay's mouth, about how Seven's actions stemmed from growing humanity rather than a retreat into Borg indifference, but he found he couldn't voice them. "I don't know Captain." He answered finally, "Come on, we've still got a dangerous route on our hands here." Janeway nodded hastily in agreement and then went to her chair to deal with more pressing concerns, Chakotay soon followed her lead.

* * *

Seven walked hurriedly into Astrometrics, ready to bury herself in the work she'd been so shamelessly shunning, but found that fate had not offered her the complete peace she needed at that moment, Icheb stood already working busily. Guilt assaulted her as irritation prickled her. Normally she loved working with her protégé, he was as efficient as she was, the Doctor had once commented that they were "on the same wavelength", but he also brought an innocent eagerness to work with him that always brightened her outlook in tandem. Still, it upset her to have to face him now, when her shame was so evident and deserved. Icheb of course didn't notice her discomfort as he turned promptly to greet her. "Good Evening Seven. I have continued with your sensor modifications as you began them, but I think you have had "best save" of the day, as the human saying goes."

Seven winced as she heard his pride in her in his voice, obviously he didn't realise how close her actions had come to getting them all killed. "Yes…" She murmured distractedly, instinctively rubbing her forehead in a typical human gesture as pain shot momentarily but sharply through the skull. She supposed if she was ever going to develop a tendency for stress headaches today would an opportune day. "I believe the saying is " best catch of the day" Icheb." She corrected as she reached the console. The Doctor had recently introduced Icheb to some common human platitudes and he was trying to incorporate them into his conversation at every opportunity.

"I apologise." Icheb said regretfully.

Seven tensed guiltily, "There is no need." She assured him softly.

Icheb began to nod when he saw the second grimace of pain cross Seven's features in as many minutes. "Are you alright Seven?" he asked anxiously.

Seven took a deep breath and let the console take some of the weight as she glanced over at him. "Do you know of a saying which can alleviate guilt Icheb?"

Icheb's brows furrowed in deep thought. "I cannot recall one immediately." He admitted apologetically, peering at her worriedly, "But I'm sure I can find one if I searched through the database…"

Seven felt a powerful surge of affection for him as she shook her head. "No, that is unnecessary Icheb." She assured him firmly, pausing for a long moment before asking another question, "Will you remain at this post for me until I come back?"

Icheb gave a bemused nod. "Yes, of course, but where are you going?"

"To correct an error." Seven replied stiffly as she left.

* * *

Seven swallowed hard as she looked around the darkened holographic quarters she had known as her own. It was irrational for her to even be here now, keeping a date with the Chakotay hologram, but she hadn't had the strength to call out anymore than "Activate programme" when she'd entered the holodeck, it felt wrong to do otherwise. She caught her reflection in the floor length mirror still there from before her first date and was disquieted to see that was unconsciously wringing her hands in the human manner. Scolding her arms to stay by her sides, she walked shakily over to the couch, unable to stand any longer but not allowing herself to relax either, perching herself on the seat like a bird on a perch ready to take flight at any given moment. She stared down at her lap as she waited, pulling at her hem of her red dress, suddenly she felt ludicrously overdressed, embarrassed by the sight of her knees. It would have been more honest to dispense with the deception and come here in here biosuit, implants present, but the holodeck had presented her this way and she hadn't resisted, had even loosened her hair again to complete the distorted picture…

She was pushed out of these thoughts by the soft swish of the doors opening and her head jerked up to see the Chakotay walking calmly in, balancing a covered dinner plate in one hand and beaming warmly at the sight of her in a way that made her heart melt and freeze up in fear at the same time. "Hey…" He greeted easily as he set the plate down on the nearby kitchen counter. "I thought I'd cook for you tonight." He unveiled the dish with a jokingly theatrical flourish, "Roast chicken, then strawberry cheesecake for after…" He tempted, "I slaved over the replicator for the whole day." He paused, obviously expecting one of her usual wryly affectionate comments, but Seven remained ominously silent. "What's wrong?"

The gentle way in which he asked this made Seven's gaze travel involuntarily to his face, but that made it even harder to force her reply out, "I just…wanted to tell you that I have enjoyed your company…immensely." She stopped as her chest tightened further and next words were somewhat breathless as well as thick with emotion, "You'll never know how deeply this experience has affected me…"

"I know." Chakotay interrupted softly, stepping towards her, "Seven, I wouldn't change what we've had so far for the world." He gave her his most charming, heart-warming smile, his dark eyes shining in the half-light of the room as dimples of pleasure formed on his cheeks. He reached out and took her hand, "I know we'll just keep making each other better and better…" Seven felt him freeze and drop her hand as she flinched at his words. When she met his eyes again they were full of hurt and confusion. "You're ending this?" His voice was harsh with disbelief. Seven forced her paralysed muscles to nod robotically in reply as she stood up hurriedly, ready to walk past him, but he seized her arm. "Why? Seven, the last few weeks have been life-changing for_ both _of us, I'm not just going to let you walk out of here without a word!"

Seven cringed painfully but kept her back to him stubbornly, staring at the floor. "It would be better if you would…" She whispered thickly, shivering as he dropped her arm in anger. "Our…relationship has led to me neglecting my duties on Voyager, I…cannot allow that to continue…"

That explanation sounded hollow, trite, even to her ears, and Chakotay took in a sharp intake of breath as if she'd slapped him."I can speak with the Captain, get her to change your duty shifts…" The desperate, pleading catch in his voice as he said this made Seven's chest tighten until she had to fight for every breath.

"It's impossible…" She pleaded, shocked by the tears she felt forming in her eyes and struggling to fall as she gave him one last look.

She was startled to see his expression harden as he looked back at her. "Ask yourself _why _you want to end this, is it just duty or something else?" He challenged harshly, doubtingly. His voice rapidly became a frustrated shout as she didn't answer, "Every time you let yourself get closer to your emotions, you back away, just like with the metronome!"

"That's not true…" Seven barely registered her own, half-moaned words as she jerked away from him. She stumbled as her world swayed, her vision suddenly blurred by more than just tears, she felt as if searing hot needles were being shoved into her through her eyes.

Chakotay ignored her words, striding forward to close the gap between them. "You're _not _Borg anymore! You're _human_!"

"_Stop_!" Seven cried out as she pushed him away, the movement causing her increasing uncoordinated body to slump forward, she was barely able to catch herself on the table with one arm.

Chakotay's voice behind her changed instantly from rage to crippling fear. "Seven? What's wrong?"

"Ahh…" She groaned, her head was being crushed and twisted in a vice of agony and now she was completely unable to catch her breath, panting in desperation as she tried to force her lungs to work. "Doctor…" She managed to force out, "Medical…Emergency…"

The ringing in her ears that had changed to a scream almost blocked out her hologram's panicked cry of her name and frantic attempt to go to her as she collapsed to the floor.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	7. Chapter 7

The Doctor transferred himself to the holodeck within moments of hearing Seven's agonised cry for help. He wasn't sure what he'd expected to find, perhaps the holodeck had malfunctioned in some way and Seven had been injured, but it wasn't the scene he saw before him as he materialised. He stood in a darkened set of quarters, identical in layout to those throughout Voyager, but he didn't take the time to study the holographic setting further as Seven demanded his attention. She lay in a crumpled heap, lifeless except for an occasional involuntary jerk of her heavy limbs. Commander Chakotay stood protectively over her, visibly distraught and obviously overwhelmed with relief by the sight of the Doctor. "Doctor! Thank God…"

"What happened?" The Doctor demanded as he moved purposely forward towards where Seven lay.

"We were…" Chakotay swallowed hard, pressing a tense hand to his forehead as he exhaled guiltily, his huge, fear-filled eyes fixated on Seven, "…having an argument and then she just collapsed…" His body tensed further as frustration entered his tone and he stared at the Doctor pleadingly, "What's _wrong_ with her?" he questioned insistently.

"I'm about to find out." The Doctor replied tersely, although not entirely without sympathy, as he ran his tricorder over Seven, noticing her attire for the first time. Normally the dress, as well as her loose golden hair, which spread out from her head like a shattered halo, would have distracted his romantic mind, but for now his medical programming was at the forefront of his concerns. "Her cortical node is shutting down…" He realised with a dazed, fearful gasp, hurriedly taking her unyielding body by the shoulder to check her over visually, "And where are her facial implants?" he asked, now utterly bemused as well as worried. Seven's implants, a map of her Borg past written all over her body, should have been on easy display in her revealing outfit, but they were nowhere to be seen, completely erased despite what his tricorder was telling him.

Confusion clouded Chakotay's ashen features as his gaze moved between Seven and the Doctor uncomprehendingly, "I thought you had removed all of her cybernetic systems…"

It was the Doctor's turn to be uncomprehending and he looked up at the Commander in disbelief, "What? I could never do that, she'd die…" He stopped mid explanation as he finally noticed that the Commander was, like Seven, out of uniform, and something clicked in his mind as he remembered exactly where he was. "Computer, deactivate programme." He ordered softly.

Disgusted anger passed over Chakotay's face for an instant, obviously unable to understand why the Doctor wasn't attending to Seven, but almost as soon at the expression appeared, he and the scene around him evaporated like a mirage. The Doctor sighed as he glanced sadly over at his patient, still unconscious but now back in her familiar form, clothed in a biosuit and with her implants as present as ever, sparking and jolting violently. "What have you been doing?" He murmured to her sorrowfully as he fondly pushed the hair away from her still face.

* * *

"Commander…" Seven mumbled, pushing the word through her dry throat as bright light assaulted her eyes. Even when dimly aware of the return of consciousness, enough of it hung back to trap her in her last memory for a few more seconds.

"If you're referring to your other holographic friend, I'm afraid he's not here." The Doctor informed her in a brisk, dry tone from somewhere above her.

These words hit Seven like a cascade of ice water and brought her mercilessly back to awareness with a sharp, horrified gasp. She sat bolt upright and almost fell off the biobed she found herself on as her head screamed in complaint, but she instinctively steadied herself enough to be able to choke out, "What?"

The Doctor peered at her knowingly as he encouraged her gently to lie back down, "Your simulations with a hologram of Commander Chakotay, you had a malfunction in the holodeck."

Seven tried to fight the shame of discovery that flooded her cheeks with a traitorous blush but found that it was futile. Instead, she focused on the part of the sentence that she was willing to acknowledge. "A malfunction?" she breathed tightly.

The Doctor sighed heavily. "Yes, and a major one. Your cortical node was shutting down when I found you." Despite her mortification at the situation, that information was shocking enough for Seven to meet his eyes and he continued, "The Chakotay hologram told me that the two of you were having an argument just before you collapsed, could you tell me about it?"

Seven's lips pressed together until they were white and bloodless, her brows knitting together mutinously, "What does that have to do with my cortical node?" she finally ground out stiffly.

"Everything, I think." The Doctor answered, "Look, environment affects everything. I need to know what you were doing just before this malfunction to help me figure out what caused this." He couldn't stop his exasperation from building as Seven remained stubbornly silent, "This is life threatening Seven, I had to resuscitate you when you came here!" He took a deep breath to calm himself as he watched Seven withdraw from him, her arms crisscrossing her body defensively and her eyes frozen to the floor. He decided to try a different tactic and placed an empathic hand on her shoulder, flinching as she shuddered at his touch. "It was a very nice programme Seven. The dress, the quarters, the candlelit meal… It looked very relaxing and…intimate."

Seven grimaced as it dawned on her just how much he had surmised and jumped off the biobed to walk away, able to feel the Doctor's eyes burrowing into her back as she paced Sickbay. Humiliation burned hot in her veins and when mixed the regret and self-hatred she had already felt there was a toxic combination of emotion that wore down her control and composure. She turned slowly to face the Doctor again, swallowing hard. "I presume your programming contains the concept of doctor-patient confidentiality?" she asked quietly.

Hurt flashed across the Doctor's face. It stung that she felt that only his programming would prevent him from breaking her confidence, he'd hoped she had more trust in their friendship than that, but given her fragile state, he let it go. "Of course it does Seven." He assured her, "I'd never repeat anything you told me in private, I never have."

Seven nodded in acknowledgement, hearing sincerity in the words, but she felt dread as well as relief, she'd committed to telling him now. "After my experiences in Unimatrix Zero…" She sighed, glancing at the Doctor to see if he was following. He nodded to her, he of course knew of Unimatrix Zero and of the freed drones Seven had communicated with within it before it had been destroyed, but he'd never delved into how deep those relationships had been, despite their obvious effect on her. "I found my life here to be…incomplete." Seven flushed at this admission, it sounded weak, even conceited, Voyager _was_ her life. Who was she to ask for more? Still she continued under the Doctor's watchful gaze , "I found that I…missed the emotions I had experienced there and wanted to feel them again." She bit her lip, regret clawing at her again, "The holodecks seemed the simplest way to achieve that."

The Doctor nodded in understanding, "Yes." He acknowledged, giving her a few seconds before he broached an even more delicate aspect, "You chose a hologram of Commander Chakotay to help you?"

Seven sighed, feeling cornered and unconsciously crossing her arms again. "Yes." She admitted tersely, fighting another blush that rose up her neck as the Doctor waited for more. Gritting her teeth and avoiding the Doctor's eyes, she added, "I respect the Commander, he has many…admirable qualities." She cringed slightly as she heard the stammer in her own voice.

The Doctor felt a smile pulling at his lips despite wanting to keep Seven at ease. Her bashful manner, so different from her usual blunt assessments of people and situations, was a pleasant revelation. In recent months, in the wake of Unimatrix Zero, he'd reluctantly begun to believe that Seven would never open up to close relationships and be as alone as The Borg intended, but now that fear was receding, much to his relief."He certainly does." He agreed warmly, letting himself smile fully now as she relaxed slightly. "This is wonderful Seven!" He told her empathically as he gave her shoulder an understanding squeeze.

Her utterly perplexed expression made his heart sink a little as she shrugged off his grip. "In what way?" she spat out incredulously, almost sounding insulted.

"You're growing! This is a huge step forward for you Seven, forming intimate relationships is the most naturally human of experiences…" He enthused, leaving her to go to his console, "When I've figured out what caused this malfunction, you can certainly expand your experiments on the holodeck…"

"No." Seven interrupted wearily, "I am going to delete the programmes, creating them in the first place was a terrible error."

"Seven…" The Doctor gasped in exasperation, "How can you say that when they've already helped you so much? There's absolutely no reason to delete them, they're nothing to be ashamed of…"

"They distracted me from my duties!" Seven snapped, "The ship could have been destroyed…" Her voice caught guiltily and the Doctor seized her arm.

"Just because you got a little too involved _once_ doesn't mean you can't learn to balance work and recreation." He told her firmly, "Everyone on this ship has had to learn to do that at some point, even the Commander."

Seven flinched at his mention of Chakotay and wrenched her arm free. "Well, I have been convinced that I've experienced enough "recreation" for the time being." She declared icily, although there was a painful edge to her tone. "Contact me when you can correct the malfunction." She said tightly as she stalked towards the door.

The Doctor sighed in defeat, but tried again to soften her resolve. "You have good taste." She spun back around as if his voice had electrocuted her, her cheeks reddening as she read into the meaning of his words. "Your quarters." He clarified with a small smile, "They suited you."

Seven took a deep breath, startled by the tears that pricked at the backs of her eyes and had to close them for a moment to stop the salty liquid from forming fully. "They were only holographic fantasies Doctor." She reminded him resignedly as she stepped out of Sickbay.

* * *

The Doctor sighed as he stood at the foot of Seven's regeneration alcove, bracing himself to tell her of a realisation which had shaken him to the very core. He only had to shake her arm to rouse her and almost immediately she stared down at him with those piercing but unreadable blue eyes. "Doctor?" she queried coolly. Obviously their earlier confrontation had not been forgotten.

"I've found the reason for your malfunction." He told her, himself not bothering with a greeting.

Seven felt a shiver of foreboding run over her, she could tell from the Doctor sombre, professional manner that the news was not good and for the moment she dismissed the embarrassment she still felt from her mind. "And?" she pressed with a calm she did not feel.

It took a long time for the Doctor to answer. "Your cortical node seems to have a function neither of us was aware of." He took a deep breath, "There is a component which appears to trigger if a drone ever reaches a certain level of…emotional stimulation…"

Seven gulped silently as she completed his train of thought. "This component, when triggered, deactivates the drone? As I almost was today?"

The Doctor grimaced at her bluntness. "Yes. It seems to be a kind of fail-safe device, designed to kill drones who become too emotional and thus independent of the Collective." He saw her pale and was quick to try to reassure her, "But I've got a plan, I _think_ I could safely remove it. It would take several operations and I'm still researching the details, but it's definitely possible…"

Seven's sigh made him pause and he looked at her to see that she stood in her usual determined stance. "You need not concern yourself Doctor, I…do not wish the failsafe to be removed."

The Doctor baulked at her. "What do you mean?" he hissed incredulously, "This is _dangerous_ Seven! You won't be able to continue with your simulations…"

"Precisely." Seven stated, her eyes distant. "The failsafe will give me further reason not to stray from my duties again to indulge in irrelevant fantasies."

The Doctor grabbed at her in frustration. "That's the Borg talking, not you." He said with unshakable certainty.

Seven gestured contemptuously at the alcoves and other Borg paraphernalia that dominated the Cargo Bay in which they stood. "I am Borg." She told him in a deadened tone, her eyes glittering for a moment before the lids flickered closed, shutting the Doctor out entirely.

She waited without moving a muscle until he'd reluctantly left her, convinced she'd retreated into regeneration, then she stepped swiftly down to the floor and strode over the Computer console. "Computer, show all holodeck programmes created by Seven of Nine." She ordered. She watched as the short, but meaningful, list appeared on the screen and her chest tightened involuntarily. "Delete all programmes, authorisation Seven of Nine Omega One Six." She whispered, flinching in physical pain as any sign of the programmes, with all the memories and emotions they conjured up, disappeared. If only the emotions she'd tied to them were so easy to erase…

* * *

Chakotay was adept at tuning out the noise of the Bridge, but in this particular shift he knew that he was truly distracted, several people had had to repeat information he had_ asked_ for more than once and that wasn't like him at all. He had hoped that with the Captain having spoken to Seven of Nine, he could forget about his tangled involvement with her over the past few days but that hope had proven to be ridiculously optimistic. Finally, he gave into his curiosity and bent over his console to find her whereabouts, although he wasn't at all sure what he'd do with the information. The location that popped up on the screen, he wasn't going to vocally ask the Computer in the middle of a busy Bridge shift, made his gut twist unexpectedly. Sickbay. What was she doing there? What had happened? The excessive unease he felt troubled him and he tried to suppress it down with the rationale that she was probably attending her usual maintenance check with the Doctor. Still, despite his best efforts, all of his crewmates around him noticed that their cool and collected Commander was a great deal more antsy than normal during that shift.

It was another two hours before he went off duty and could leave the Bridge unhindered, and before retreating to his quarters he headed for the holodecks, trying not to analyse his reason for doing so. He had just reached the door for Holodeck 1 when the Doctor walked past him, a strange look passing over his face at the sight of him. "Taking a break on the holodeck are we Commander?" he asked, his voice tight.

Chakotay couldn't help but feel flustered under the hologram's oddly searching gaze, as if he sensed something was amiss. "Oh…Uh, I was just checking something out." He muttered sheepishly before a question of his own sprang impulsively to his lips, "Is Seven okay?" He saw the Doctor's surprised expression and tried to explain, "I was looking for her to…ask her something and the Computer said she was in Sickbay. I was…" He raked through his mind for an appropriate word, deciding "worried" was too strong, "…concerned about her." He finished lamely.

The Doctor stared at him, almost disbelievingly, for a few seconds before his face clouded over, which Chakotay noted with unease. "She's fine now." He said shortly, "One of her implants malfunctioned, that's all."

Chakotay could see there was more to it than that but didn't feel able to pry. "Will you be able to fix it for her?" he asked worriedly.

"If she lets me." The Doctor muttered to himself under his breath, but Chakotay heard him. "Excuse me Commander; I should be getting back to Sickbay." He said abruptly.

"Of course." Chakotay agreed, stepping aside to let him pass before slipping into Holodeck 1. "Computer, activate recording of programme Seven of Nine Beta 3. Override privacy protocols, authorisation Chakotay Alpha 9 Zeta 2."

"Unable to comply." The Computer intoned solemnly, "The programme Seven of Nine Beta 3 has been deleted by the registered user."

**A/n: Wow, I didn't intend for this chapter to be so long, I hope you all like it! PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	8. Chapter 8

Chakotay felt his jaw set, his teeth grinding together, as he looked down at the latest duty shift rota. There wasn't much out of the ordinary about it, he might even have been pleased at how much the crew were stepping up in order to complete the repairs caused by the minefield as fast as possible, but as it was he was frustrated by the one person whom he knew was doing too much. He glanced up at Lieutenant Wiseman, who had been helping him compile the duty shifts that day. It was normally his sole responsibility but with having to supervise repairs as well he needed all the help he could get. "Did Seven really _request_ all of these extra shifts in Astrometrics and Engineering?" he asked.

Lieutenant Wiseman was perplexed by both the strange question and the sharp edge to the Commander's tone, but answered honestly, "She was very clear about it to me Commander. Even though all of those hours stretch regulations, she seems to think that with the minefield so close behind us she needs to be extra vigilant in Astrometrics. As for Engineering, with all the repairs I thought…" He stopped as Chakotay breathed a frustrated sigh, "I suppose I could tell her that all of those shifts aren't available…"

Chakotay's lips curled sadly as he saw how intimidated the other man was at the prospect of a confrontation with Seven. It hadn't been long ago that he himself had been exceptionally wary of the former drone, but now he just couldn't fathom it, not for the same reasons anyway. "It's okay Lieutenant." He told him resignedly, "She's probably right about the repairs anyway, they'd certainly go slower without her…"

Tom's ears pricked at Chakotay's tone. "Seven causing you trouble Chakotay?"

"No." Chakotay replied hurriedly, sinking back in his chair with a distracted sigh, "I just wonder how Seven has any time to sleep, that's all…"

Tom twisted around in his pilot's chair, an amused smirk pulling at his lips. "Ah, but that's her trick isn't it? She _doesn't_ sleep, she regenerates and as well all know by now that's more efficient." He saw that his mild jest was just deepening Chakotay's frown and changed tact. "If it makes you feel better about overworking her, B'Elanna told me she's been much easier to deal with in Engineering the past few days, quieter. She's hardly mentioned any so called "improvements" to B'Elanna."

As Chakotay mulled this over, Harry spoke up from Ops, looking almost as disquieted as Chakotay felt by Tom's words, "Maybe she's still feeling guilty about almost missing those mines?" he suggested uneasily.

"I don't see why." Tom said firmly, facing his friend fully, "We _did_ miss them and that's the important thing. If I beat myself up every time I had a narrow escape I'd be…"

"Pretty beaten up?" Chakotay finished wryly as Tom's support of Seven filled him with an unexpected wave of gratitude. It would do Seven a lot of good to hear those words with her own ears, although he doubted that was all that was bothering her. He'd spent over an hour trying to retrieve her holodeck programmes, hoping to help her or, the more cynical part of his brain suspected, alleviate his own confusion and guilt, over the whole thing. However, the deletion of the programmes had been so absolute and methodical that Chakotay knew, even as a depressed, thwarted frustration bubbled within him at the realisation, that Seven had overseen the destruction of her holographic life herself. Of course, she was entirely within her rights to do so, but where the relief should have settled in his brain at the thought of her simulations being over, anxiety stubbornly resided instead.

Tom laughed heartily, "Definitely, and you and the Captain would be due a few blows at me!" Harry laughed too and Chakotay managed to summon up a chuckle from somewhere despite his conflicted thoughts. Harry seemed to take this as a cue to continue conversing as they worked.

"So, did Neelix talk you into attending his cooking class tonight?" he asked in good humoured curiosity.

"I gave him permission to hold it myself." Chakotay replied with a dry smile, "We all need time to unwind and my cooking skills couldn't get much worse." Just as these words left his lips, the taste, as well as image, of one of the Captain's burnt creations popped into his mind and he grimaced. Maybe he should be glad of what culinary skills he had.

"I doubt preparing "Talaxian tenderloin in ten minutes" will give any of us much time to unwind." Tom remarked before cracking a good-natured grin, "B'Elanna and I will definitely be there."

Harry returned the grin in relief, he hadn't wanted to deal with all of Neelix's enthusiasm without back up, and then turned to Tuvok at Tactical. "Are you going to join us Mr Tuvok?"

Tuvok's shoulders quivered in a tiny, almost inaudible, sigh before straightening stoically. "I did not intend to originally, but the Captain has since advised me that it would be illogical to miss the opportunity to perfect a new skill."

"And she'd be right about that." Tom assured him solemnly, although his gleeful smile was at odds with his words. "You'd better report to the Mess Hall at 1900 hours just like the rest of us then Mr Tuvok."

Chakotay's gaze focused on the PADD again as he tuned out the rest of the friendly banter, and to his dismay found that Seven's long hours were still troubling him. He'd understand if she was just avoiding _him_ for the sake of peace of mind, but she was shutting herself away again, the very habit her programmes seemed to be starting to break. He couldn't just let her slide back from all of that progress, could he?

* * *

Seven felt her lips purse and her stride shorten in agitation as she spotted another inaccuracy in her report into the alien minefield. It had to be _perfect_ if the Captain was going to forgive her for her idiocy, let alone forgive herself and ease her heart's grip on that particular guilt. Bowing her head even deeper over the PADD, she began to intently dial in her corrections, but as rounded the corner a near collision made her head snap upwards. Blood rushed up towards her face as her eyes were met first with a broad chest then moved upwards to its owner, Commander Chakotay, but thankfully she was almost sure she managed to stop the blood before it reached her cheeks. "I apologise Commander." His easy smile in immediate reply surprised her enough to pause for a second, but that wasn't enough time for Chakotay to reply properly.

The smile he gave her was almost unconscious, he was actually pleased to see her, near collision or not, and his eye thought he caught the tiniest of blushes, although when he blinked it was gone. "It's no problem…" He fought the urge to cry out an irritated "Hey" as she seemed to barely register his words, stepping swiftly aside and striding rapidly on her way. Instead, he impulsively turned on his heel and followed her. He had to jog slightly at first to keep up with her, despite his longer legs. "Where's the fire?" he asked as he reached her side.

Her eyebrows crinkled in bemusement. "Fire?" she asked sharply, although he could hear a quiver in her voice, as if she wasn't certain whether or to take him literally. Chakotay couldn't help but find that somewhat endearing despite her tone and she seemed to take the hint in the words well enough, she slowed to an abrupt halt.

He gave her the explanation she was searching his face for by rephrasing. "What's the hurry?"

Seven's grip tightened self-consciously around the PADD, only now sensing that he wanted to converse with her and picking up her pace again accordingly. "I must complete my report into the alien minefield and their other weapons installations." She answered with cold dismissively, hoping against hope that that tone, which scared off many of her crewmates over the years, would be effective on the Commander too.

He didn't even flinch, becoming somehow more persistent as he faced her. "Come on, you saved the ship, I think you deserve a break." He saw a wince pass fleetingly over her features, disbelief at his words glinting in her eyes for a split second that made him all the determined to convince her. "I'm on my way to Neelix's cooking lesson in the Mess Hall, "Talaxian tenderloin in ten minutes", why don't you join me?" He gave her an encouraging smile, "It'll be fun." He assured her softly.

Seven couldn't stop herself from breaking eye contact, shaken. The fact that here Chakotay was inviting her to cook, a hobby she'd indulged in with her fantasy of him, was painfully ironic. "I am no longer interested in cooking." She finally responded stiffly after an uncomfortable pause.

Chakotay almost reached out for her arm as he realised he'd made a bad misstep. Going cooking with him was just too reminiscent of the holodeck, probably for him as well as her now that he thought about it. Still, he wanted her to go, show her that she could have some of what she'd dreamed of in the holodeck, and it was too late to fully back out now. "Then come for the company." He suggested in a last ditch effort, "B'Elanna's coming, even Tuvok promised to make an appearance." He smiled, as he had earlier, at the thought, hoping to draw Seven in, but it seemed to have no affect, even stiffening her resolve.

This time Seven locked her eyes with him, she had to understand why he was suddenly being so magnanimous towards her when she'd done nothing of merit to deserve it, in fact quite the opposite, she deserved his revulsion for what she had done. Was it pity? The Doctor may have told him something, a nagging voice in her head proposed, but she shunned it away violently as she answered coolly, "I'd rather not." On autopilot, she remembered the courtesies the Doctor had made her memorise, "Perhaps another time?"

Chakotay felt real anger towards her for the first time, he'd never known Seven to be insincere. Cold maybe, reserved, but never insincere. He could see in her eyes that as far as she was concerned she never wanted that "time" to come and that realisation made something in him snap. "You know, I just wanted to socialise with the crew for once…" He told her hotly, barely able to stop himself saying the "real crew" and revealing everything he knew, "It might do you some good!"

Seven stepped back from him, her body lurching momentarily as if he'd struck her. He may as well have, the shock of the angry words was akin to a kick in the stomach. She ignored his gasp as he belatedly took in the hurt he'd inflicted on her and found herself nodding robotically before she turned quickly and headed off the way she had come, away from him and what he represented. After all, what he'd said was perfectly true.

Chakotay gulped, guilt overwhelming him, as she twisted away from him. He had, of course, regretted what he'd said within seconds of it leaving his mouth and seeing the devastation cross her face before her Borg mask asserted itself, enforcing impassivity he knew was false. He couldn't blame her for that self-protection mechanism, far from it. If someone who had seen what he'd seen of her inner, private world could still be unspeakably cruel to her, she obviously needed it. Ignorant of those uninformed crewmembers milling nonchalantly past him, he kicked out at the wall in frustration. None of said crewmembers questioned him, they saw at once that he was in a black mood as he retreated to his quarters. Talaxian tenderloin would just have to wait for him too.

**A/n: This is more angsty than I intended, but I hope you still like it! I'll try to update tomorrow. PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/n: I really apologise for getting this up a day late. I fell over yesterday and hurt my hands a bit, so I took a break from typing the latter half of this chapter. I'm fine now though, don't worry!**

"One of the connective implants in your arm was slightly out of alignment, but I've corrected it now." The Doctor informed Seven as he gave her one last quick scan with the tricorder, "You'll need to be more careful when you're crawling through Jeffries tubes, it was the shock you got from that malfunctioning gel pack that caused it…" He paused mid explanation as he realised she wasn't listening to him as intently as she should have been. Her body had curled in on itself, her shoulders hunched and her legs already hanging off the bed, as if she were preparing to run away. "Seven?" he probed, snapping the tricorder off with a dry click.

The sound seemed to alert Seven, her gaze finally focusing as she straightened herself up on the biobed defensively. "Thank you Doctor." In an intrinsically human gesture, and thus probably one she wasn't consciously aware of, she brushed her hand tiredly against her forehead. "It won't happen again."

The Doctor responded with a doubtful frown, "It will if you don't stop running yourself into the ground." He said in exasperation, "You've been doing an insane number of shifts for weeks, ever since…" The words died in his throat as he saw her face close up and anger flared instantaneously within him. It wasn't like Seven to avoid facing something and she'd developed the trait just as she was in danger! "I've got half a mind to go to the Captain and Commander Chakotay both and tell them to cut your workload for medical reasons…" He threatened half-heartedly.

Seven finally spun to face him, eyes flashing in warning as shame darkened her cheeks. "You will do no such thing." She said icily before sighing as he turned away from her. Both of them knew he'd never say anything, but the shadow of the secret sat as stubbornly between them as a barbed wire fence, ready to prick either of them at any moment. "There is nothing wrong with me Doctor; I've always liked to work." She reminded him, her demeanour softening.

The Doctor bit his lip pensively, "I know you do, but you also always take things to the extreme." Both of them winced as they recalled their previous discussion, but the Doctor felt that, this time at least, he had to persevere and make his point. "Look, just because you're unwilling to go ahead with more…social interaction at the moment…" He began carefully, "…doesn't mean you can't relax at all! You used to engage in hobbies didn't you? Playing the piano, cooking…"

Seven took a deep breath as she stared him down defiantly. "I am just reassessing my options for relaxation at the moment Doctor."

For once, the Doctor didn't let her excuses distract him in the slightest. "Maybe going to the reception party for the Ledosian delegation tonight would help you reassess." He countered, "The whole crew will be there at some point, there is no reason why you shouldn't at least make an appearance." He put a reassuring hand on her shoulder as he watched her head dip unhappily, "You'll be fine at a big gathering like this, don't worry." He murmured kindly before releasing a heavy sigh, "Still, I wish you'd reconsider my proposal to remove…"

Seven shuddered under his grip as she shrugged it off, her whole frame freezing like the arctic ice her blue eyes suddenly resembled. "I believe I've already informed you of my final decision regarding that Doctor." She said sharply before a sigh left her which seemed to give her body permission to sag in defeat. "As for tonight's diplomatic function, the Captain has made it clear that my attendance is mandatory." She admitted, not bothering to disguise her resentment. "The Ledosians are apparently interested in my warp theory expertise."

"Well, aren't they supposed to be some of the scientific leaders on that subject in this quadrant?" The Doctor queried, trying to recall the briefing the Captain had given the senior officers on their newest First Contact.

"Apparently so." Seven replied, her dismissive tone showing how little credence she put on the information. Despite their admirable technology, it matched and even exceeded that of the Federation in some ways, the Ledosians had not made a good impression on her when she'd been present for the trade treaty negotiations the day before. They struck her as a ponderous and conceited species on the whole, but they were peaceable and as the Captain had told her, Voyager needed all the friends they could get.

"Then of course they'd want to talk to you wouldn't they?" The Doctor said, a hopeful smile spreading across his lips. "That means you'll probably need to play a bigger role than usual at the party…" He began pacing the floor in front of her thoughtfully, "You should get a nice formal cocktail dress, everyone else will be in their dress uniforms after all. It would be simple enough to replicate one using the same material as your biosuits to be comfortable on your implants…

Seven gave a tiny grimace out of his line of vision. She knew the Doctor's intentions were good, but the patronising feeling she was experiencing lingered. Now that he had seen her dream of humanity, quarters, fashion, lovers, he seemed to think that by offering her a poor substitute for these things he was helping her. It was like waving a toy in front of an injured child to distract them from the pain… "I'll consider it Doctor." She said shortly, interrupting his speculation, "May I leave now?"

The Doctor's face blanched in disappointment, but she'd already jumped down from the biobed in anticipation of him letting her go. "Oh, alright then." He conceded wanly.

* * *

Seven felt at a loss as she left Sickbay, despite her relief at escaping from the Doctor's interrogation, she really had little else to do. Icheb had been requesting a solo shift in Astrometrics for days and today she'd reluctantly agreed to let him work alone for a couple of hours. Engineering wasn't an option either, now that the repairs were completed B'Elanna was running a systems diagnostic and Seven knew better than to force her presence on her during such a procedure, pregnancy had made the half-Klingon woman's fuse even shorter than usual. Her own body promptly answered her dilemma by making her stomach growl hungrily and with a sigh she turned towards the Mess Hall, it would no doubt be mercifully quiet right now, the lunch rush was long since over and the afternoon work shift in full swing. If she were lucky, she might even have the place to herself and prepare something in the galley rather than resorting to her usual limited range of nutritional supplements.

Her hopes were ruthlessly dashed as she walked into the Mess Hall to find Neelix busily rampaging around the galley, managing to juggle several strange concoctions at once, but it was the sight of Chakotay, his tall frame sitting awkwardly on one of the galley stools while a bright purple, steaming soup sat in front of him, that made her freeze to the spot.

She was just considering if it were feasible to leave without the two men noticing her when both did. "Seven!" Neelix welcomed cheerily, his usual friendly, beaming smile spreading across his face as he bustled over to her. To her surprise, she found that Chakotay, although obviously initially startled by her arrival, smiled at her with just as much genuine warmth as Neelix. She was absurdly glad when Neelix stepped between them, giving her an excuse to look away from the Commander. "I'm glad you're here, I'm rehearsing the meal for tonight and the Commander is helping me taste test!" Seven relaxed a little, that explained the smile, Chakotay was just relieved that someone was interrupting Neelix's experiments on his taste buds; it had little to do with her. "I'd be honoured if you'd help too Seven. I'm sure the Borg assimilated something of the Ledosians likes and dislikes, right?" Neelix asked her hopefully.

"I don't think cuisine is really what the Borg is interested in Neelix…" Chakotay intervened carefully.

Seven shot him a grateful look as she tried hurriedly to agree, "The Commander is right Mr Neelix, I'm not sure if I'm suited to…" She saw Neelix's face fall, his amber eyes dimming, and the excuse stuck guiltily in her throat, "But if you really want me to assist you…" She started lamely, cringing a bit at getting herself into this. She just found it difficult to deny such a request, she liked Neelix. Despite often finding his gregarious personality overwhelming, he'd been unfailing good to her since her first day on Voyager and she knew that she had to find ways to repay the favour occasionally.

Neelix's face lit up again instantly. "Of course I do Seven!" He grasped up at her shoulder with a surprisingly firm grip and led her towards where Chakotay sat. "I'm sure the Commander would like someone to talk to while I'm so busy cooking!" He added with a chuckle, and with his typical disregard for personal space, made sure Seven sat right beside Chakotay.

"That would be nice but…" Chakotay stopped as he felt Seven's leg accidently brush against his own as she moved obligingly onto the stool, it wasn't the touch that disturbed him but the way she drew back as if he'd electrocute her. "You've always been able to talk as you cooked before Neelix." He finished hurriedly, trying to cover up the pause and feeling strangely breathless.

"That is very true." Seven murmured, keeping her head down as she shrank self-consciously against the stool, keeping a wary distance from Chakotay. Remembering Neelix's request to talk as the Talaxian disappeared to the back of the galley, no doubt to bring out another of his delicacies, she cleared her throat awkwardly. "I did not realise your interest in cooking extended to taste testing Commander."

Chakotay exhaled as she spoke, feeling relieved. He'd been giving her a wide berth, for both their sakes, since the incident with the cooking class invite. Her reference to it let him hope she'd forgiven him. "It hasn't." He admitted, leaning forward to speak out of Neelix's earshot and perhaps catch her eye, although she seemed even more skittish of him than before. Obviously the attraction she felt for his hologram had not entirely been erased from her mind as the programme itself had been from the computer. Smiling wryly as he caught an enquiring quirk of her eyebrow, he explained, "The Captain asked me to come down here to check up on Neelix's preparations for the dinner tonight but Neelix seems determined to make me try every dish…" He gave an exasperated chuckle, "I was only supposed to be here for five minutes, max."

Despite herself, Seven was intrigued and turned towards him slightly. "And how long have you actually been here?" she asked.

"Almost an hour." Chakotay replied sheepishly.

Seven cast a glance at Neelix's back as he poured a runny dressing over two servings of an unique looking salad, and smiled in understanding. "Then I'm sure the Captain will be sending you reinforcements anytime now."

"Maybe." Chakotay agreed, encouraged by the reappearance of her usual dry humour. He'd need to break the ice a lot more though, if he was going to tell her what she needed to know, to help both of them. "Are you coming to the dinner tonight?" he asked cautiously, not wanting a repeat of the heated scene last time he'd pried into her social life, her real one that is.

Seven seemed to find it an acceptable question though. "The Ledosians seem to be interested in my expertise." She told him, giving a small sigh. "The Captain…"

"Encouraged you to attend?" Chakotay finished knowingly.

Seven's gaze involuntarily shot to meet his, feeling an unexpected laugh bubble out through her lips as she saw the twinkle in his eyes, reassuring despite the memories and feelings it brought up for her. It was a long standing joke among Voyager's more stubborn crewmembers that any "encouragement" from the Captain was a whisker away from being an order. "You could say that." She answered, her shyness rapidly returning as she felt his intent eyes on her.

Chakotay felt relief start to painstakingly loosen the knot of tension in his gut as he heard her laugh. He had, of course, heard it on the holodeck and thus knew she was holding back, but it still sounded exotic to him and made him more sure he could talk to her frankly without crashing and burning. He took a risk and touched her arm, "Hopefully it won't be a drawn out affair, the Captain doesn't like strangers on her ship for too long…"

Seven coloured as the heat from his hand travelled up her arm, but thankfully Neelix resurfaced before she had to make further conversation. He put the plates of salad down in front of them with a flourish. "This is my provisional salad course. I'm sure you'll never be able to guess the secret ingredient in the dressing."

"No Neelix, I'm sure we won't." Chakotay replied weakly as he took the tiniest morsel of the soaked salad onto his fork he could get away with and popped it hastily into his mouth to swallow it quickly. Unfortunately the taste was so unlike anything he'd ever tasted, and not in a good way, that his throat refused to swallow it until he gulped down a mouthful of water. "It's very…unique Neelix, perhaps a bit too daring for our guests though…" He began diplomatically.

As a testament to the salad's flavour, even Seven, who'd often declared taste irrelevant, gagged a little before getting her forkful down, dapping at her lips before cutting Chakotay off. "Is there Scolympian ginger in this Neelix?" she asked, causing Chakotay to stare at her in amazement.

"Why, yes!" Neelix answered eagerly, "You guessed the secret ingredient Seven!"

"I am sorry to say that you must remove it Neelix, some of the chemical elements in that ginger are poisonous to Ledosian physiology."

Neelix looked horrified, snatching the plates away. "Really? The Doctor is supposed to tell me these things! I don't dare to think about what would've happened…" He trailed off as he hurried back to his stove. "I'll need to come up with a replacement!"

As they watched him fret, Chakotay leaned towards Seven to murmur a question in her ear. She had to fight the urge to jerk back nervously as his breath tickled her. "Is that stuff _really_ poisonous to Ledosians Seven?"

"Yes, I would not lie about such a thing Commander." Seven responded seriously.

Chakotay became flustered as he worried he'd offended her. "I know you wouldn't…I just…"

Seven was disconcerted by his embarrassment and looked back at Neelix, who was now chopping at the familiar twisted growth that was Leola root. "I would perhaps lie to save the Ledosians from Leola root." She remarked drily.

Chakotay found himself having to stifle a loud guffaw at that, his reaction obviously startling her as she jumped at the strangled sound. "Well…" He replied, choking back more laughter as his gaze moved from the Leola root to Seven. "I dare you." He challenged suddenly.

Seven's eyebrows arched until they reached her hairline and she stared at him openly, her reserve towards him pushed aside by surprise. "You _dare_ me?" she asked incredulously.

Chakotay nodded rigorously, grinning like a schoolboy. He relished the chance to have a normal conversation with her, reset their relationship back on an even keel, even if it meant his being childish to do it. "Yes, I _dare _you to tell him just that." He clarified, "For the sake of _our_ stomachs Seven, not just the Ledosians."

Seven studied him for a minute. She'd given up avoiding looking at him, it was times like this she wished she hadn't been so ambitious in the attractive magnetism of her hologram, or at least based it on a man with a less alluring voice, just not looking at him didn't seem to lessen his effect on her. She took a deep breath as she considered, it made her strangely happy to see this teasing side of this character, it made her worries about his disapproval ease, her heart lighten. Giving in as he continued to grin at her encouragingly, she called through to Neelix. "Mr Neelix, I believe you may have the same problem with Leola root, don't use that either!"

Chakotay found the fact that her voice remained steady throughout this trick, even as her lips twitched at him conspiratorially, gut achingly funny and it took all he had to hold his laughter in until Neelix ran off apologetically to Aeroponics for some emergency vegetable gathering. "Only you would be able to do that with a straight face!" He told Seven admiringly when he finally managed to speak through his chortling.

Seven shrugged dismissively, but he could see the smile pulling at her lips. "He didn't see my face, it was my voice that did the work." She pointed out.

"Same thing…" Chakotay started to reply before being interrupted by Seven's comm. badge.

Seven tapped her comm. badge."Seven of Nine here."

"Seven, I need you to report to the Bridge. The Ledosians have a proposition for you." The Captain said through the comm. line.

"Of course Captain." Seven replied hurriedly, stumbling awkwardly as she tried to get off of her stool too quickly.

Chakotay instinctively caught her by the arm, stopping her fall, but very aware of her muscles tensing in panic at his touch. For an instant, he thought he saw her pale and he knew at once that their few minutes of ease and light-heartedness were gone, like waking up from a dream. He wondered if they'd ever get to the stage were they'd be like that all the time, especially if he _did_ tell her about what he'd done… Gulping slightly, he helped her regain her balance before quickly letting go. "Be careful." He reminded her softly.

Seven stared at her feet, again painfully self-aware. "Thank you Commander." She murmured as she turned towards the door, heart thumping traitorously.

"I'll see you at the dinner." Chakotay said quietly, suddenly deadly serious, "We'll talk."

Seven felt her mouth dry up. Talk about what exactly? "As you wish Commander." She mumbled obediently after a long pause and then continued towards the Bridge.

**A/n: I might have gone a little bit overboard with the fluff in this chapter, but most of you did say that the ice should be broken a bit. Also, before any of you ask, I've written the Ledosians in on purpose, wait and see… ;) PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D **


	10. Chapter 10

**A/n: This chapter is dedicated to NikkiB1973 for writing a wonderful P/T one-shot called "First Kiss". Everyone should read it, it's so sweet! :)**

Chakotay looked on in amusement as the Captain tapped her foot impatiently. "They're on their way Captain." He assured her quietly.

"I know." The Captain replied shortly, before sighing at her own irritation. "I just don't like being kept waiting. We could really use an ally and the Ledosians are looking like they could be…"

Chakotay's lips quirked upwards. "Unless they keep you waiting much longer, they will be." He told her wryly, turning to Ensign Danes at transporter control as Janeway laughed, "Have they given the signal to be beamed up yet Ensign?"

"No sir, apparently two members of the delegation are running a little late, but they've given assurances that they're almost ready." Danes answered quickly.

Janeway exhaled in relief. Although she'd learned over the years not to set her expectations too high when it came to initial diplomatic relations in the Delta Quadrant, where the helpful clout of the Federation was non-existent, she was allowing herself some hope with the Ledosians. They were said to be advanced and peaceful, a reputation which had proven correct so far, and were even offering the entire crew shore leave as well as opening trade negotiations and giving Seven an invite to their prestigious warp mechanics conference. Scientists and engineers from throughout the sector would be there, it would be a great chance to network, if Seven could cope… She shook her head slightly at her train of thought, she'd have to trust that Seven would be fine. Whatever had been going on with Voyager's ex-drone a few weeks ago in the holodeck seemed to have resolved itself, just as Chakotay had told her it would, and she'd decided to forgive the brief, but unsettling, blip in the younger woman's behaviour. Seven had even appeared to be excited, by her standards, at the thought of taking part. Janeway had to admit that it probably wouldn't do their standing with the Ledosians any harm if Seven amazed them with a few titbits of her Borg knowledge…

As if Janeway's thoughts had somehow called her, Seven just then joined them in Transporter Room 2, holding a large PADD. "You wished to see me Captain?" she said politely, her gaze sweeping quickly over the others waiting in the room, Chakotay and Tuvok, but she did not greet them.

"Yes Seven, I thought that since you're going to be our main representative by attending this conference, you'd better play a bigger role than usual in greeting them, let them get to know you." Janeway informed her with a smile.

Seven's brow furrowed uncertainly, "I'm not sure if "getting to know me" in a social setting will help them accept my warp theories Captain. It would take a great deal of explanation which I doubt would be appropriate dinner conversation…"

Janeway put her hand on Seven's arm to stop her. "Tonight is more about diplomacy and new friendship than scientific debate Seven. Being in a "social setting", as you say, will help trust develop and that's what's needed here. An alliance is more than just sharing information, it's about sharing a part of ourselves." She gave Seven an encouraging look, "I know this is the first time you've been asked to play a truly diplomatic role, but it'll be good for you and I'm sure you'll do well."

"Thank you Captain." Seven replied, keeping her voice to a modest murmur as she averted her gaze, trying to ignore the pressure she could feel building up around her. Of course, she was pleased that the Captain trusted her with such an important mission, but she couldn't help but feel unequal to it. She could discuss warp mechanics with ease, had planned out all of interesting aspects she was going to introduce to the conference, but diplomacy? Since part of her, her Borg identity, still couldn't fathom the purpose of it, how was she supposed to properly represent Voyager?

"Captain, I'm pretty sure the focus of the conference will be on engine schematics rather than treaties and Seven can handle that infinitely better than any regular old Starfleet diplomat." Chakotay remarked calmly, shooting Seven a reassuring smile. Despite feeling relieved at hearing the pride in the Captain's voice, he knew he had to rein in her expectations a bit as he watched Seven tense up under the weight of them, his heart giving an empathic twinge.

Seven felt warm gratitude radiate over her at Chakotay's words, some of the tension in her muscles easing before a chill of anxiety ruined her new calm, it unnerved her that he'd known exactly what she needed to hear. Was she really so transparent? Unconsciously she shifted back from him as she hurriedly handed her PADD to the Captain for inspection. "Here is my plan for the three days of the conference Captain, I hope you find it appropriate."

The Captain gave the data on the PADD a precursory glance, "You seem to have everything well organised Seven…" That was something of an understatement, Seven had taken the timetable of the conference, which was spread over three days, and had noted in detail everything she intended to do to fill every minute of those three days. "But do remember to have some _fun_ too, just because you've been offered this opportunity doesn't mean you need to miss out on shore leave altogether."

Seven swallowed, obviously caught off guard by the Captain's advice, which she found more than a little contradictory. How was she supposed to be a respectable envoy for Voyager and yet have fun at the same time? "I will consider making room for fun Captain, and perhaps research some options." She finally answered stiffly.

"Ledosia is a beautiful world, I'm sure you'll come up with something to do, but I've found that spontaneous fun is much better than anything scheduled Seven." Chakotay advised her kindly, thinking back on their high-jinx in the Mess Hall that afternoon.

"I do not believe I am well suited to spontaneity Commander." Seven replied quickly without thinking, blood rushing to her cheeks as he gave her a small, knowing, grin and the memory of their meeting in the Mess Hall rushed back to her like a tidal wave. He was right, that had been spontaneous, embarrassingly so.

Janeway, mistaking the reason for Seven's embarrassment and thinking Chakotay was teasing the sheltered, workaholic ex-Borg unnecessarily, said comfortingly, "Don't worry Seven, I'm sure that the Ledosians coming here tonight can tell you about what they do in their free time. Maybe you can join them when you're down there?"

Seven didn't have time to respond before Ensign Danes spoke up from the transporter station. "I'm beaming up our guests now Captain."

Janeway nodded and within a few seconds a group of six Ledosians, five male and one female, arrived on the transporter pad. Janeway smiled at the most elaborately dressed male, the ambassador she'd been talking to for days by comm., and reached out for his hand, which he, after a small pause, took firmly, "Ambassador Weltin, welcome to Voyager. I hope you had a smooth first experience on our transporter."

"Oh, it was amazing, there's never been such a leap forward since warp…" Another man, standing well behind Weltin enthused in awe, his eyes, wide set on a thin, sallow face, already studying every aspect of the room intently. "How does it work exact…"

"Dr Mallon, please!" Weltin interrupted in exasperation, "Those kinds of questions can surely wait." Despite Weltin's diminutive, portly appearance, his voice dripped authority and Dr Mallon fell silent, although obviously irritated. "I apologise Captain." Weltin said, his tone now deceptively smooth, "Dr Mallon is the esteemed scientist in our group and he's therefore overwhelmed by all the technological might your ship displays, please forgive him."

Janeway gave Mallon an understanding smile and extended her arms out to the full group in welcome. "Oh there's no need Ambassador please, we'll be happy to give you a tour later, after our meal together. Our Morale Officer Mr Neelix, who's also our in-house chef, has been preparing for your arrival all day." She waved for Chakotay, Tuvok and Seven to step forward, "This is Commander Chakotay, our First Officer, Lt. Cmdr. Tuvok, our Head of Security and Tactical Officer, and Seven of Nine…"

While the five others in the group eyed Seven with either fear or repulsed fascination that made Chakotay grit his teeth, wondering how Seven could stand it so impassively, Dr Mallon strode up to her confidently. "I've already spoken to Miss Seven of Nine Captain, it was I who suggested she attend our conference."

"That is true Captain, Dr Mallon and I have already conversed." Seven confirmed, not adding, as she felt the Ledosian's eyes roaming over her, that she'd accepted the invite _despite_ of his manner rather than because of it. She was suddenly glad she'd stuck with a clean biosuit rather than a wearing a dress as the Doctor had suggested, although she couldn't quite put her finger on what exactly about Mallon sparked the irrational feeling.

"Good, you already have something in common to talk about then." The Captain said warmly, "We'll continue the introductions as we make our way to the Mess Hall, shall we? Mr Neelix will be getting anxious."

Weltin gave a graceful nod, "Of course Captain."

* * *

Conversation began to flow as they slowly made their way, almost in processional form with the Captain and Weltin at the head of the group, towards the Mess Hall. Chakotay soon lost his concentration in the overload of introductions and small talk, but his ear soon zoned in on Seven's stoic voice as she continued to be cornered by the persistent Dr Mallon. "And you were part of Unimatrix One, where the drones are central to the Queen?" Mallon asked loudly.

Seven flinched as the five pairs of eyes of the other Ledosians focused in on her, the hallway almost falling silent. So much for the "blending in" the Doctor told me to attempt, she thought sarcastically as she answered, keeping her voice patient, "Yes, I was once a member of Unimatrix One, which serves the Queen more directly than others." She couldn't help but put emphasis on the "once" in that sentence, hoping he'd take the hint.

He didn't, most of what she'd said seemed to go flying over his bald head as he continued to stare at her in continued admiration. "I must say I'm shocked to see a former drone being so well-preserved! It's truly amazing. I'm sure I'd be able to convince the team running the conference to let you discuss your cybernetic implants…"

Seven coloured as his words elicited both impotent anger and shame. She took a deep breath, remembering the Captain's faith in her diplomatic skills, "I don't think that would be appropriate, neither would I be comfortable…"

Chakotay's voice, with a sharper edge to his deep, soft voice than usual, came from so close behind them that Seven jumped. "I'm sure that conference is planned months in advance Doctor Mallon, and I assure you that Seven is very good on warp mechanics."

Mallon was just about astute enough to hear the warning in the other man's voice and quickly disowned his previously cherished idea. "Of course she is Commander, I got a little carried away with enthusiasm that's all…" He laughed weakly, "I'm sure Miss Seven could supply us with enough knowledge to hold a number of conferences on any number of subjects." Thinking he had salvaged his dignity, he scurried off to rejoin his group for the time being.

"Sorry about that." Chakotay murmured to Seven as he automatically took Mallon's place walking at her side.

Seven thought she could sense that he wasn't sorry at all and that made her more uneasy than talking to Mallon ever had. Why did he keep intervening? There was no reason for him to feel obliged, perhaps he'd felt pity for her embarrassment? "No need Commander." She replied quickly, turning her attention back to the rest of the group as they all began to troop inside the Mess Hall.

Chakotay grimaced slightly, hearing a double meaning in her words as she turned away from him with an unreadable expression in her eyes. There had been no need for his words with Mallon as well as his apology, he'd probably offended her. He hadn't intended to butt in, far from it, but Mallon had crossed a line too far. The way the squat little man peered at Seven, as if he was trying to decide whether to lust after her or dissect her for her implants, had set his blood on a constant simmer since he'd laid eyes on the man and those insensitive comments about the Borg had caused his anger to boil over. He found that he didn't even regret putting the man, a foreign dignitary after all, in his place and that realisation made him sigh. Seven had dragged him into her concerns and he'd need to talk _everything_ out with her if he was ever going to be free of them.

* * *

The Mess Hall however, was not the place for an intensely private conversation that particular night. All of the senior officers, including the Doctor although he couldn't eat, had a place with the Ledosian delegation at the main table, in reality several smaller tables pushed snugly together, the joins hidden by a tablecloth. The food, considerably toned down by Neelix after the fright Seven and Chakotay had given him to the benefit of the diners, was plentiful and synthehol and conversation flowed. Seven was one of the few that sat in near silence, with Mallon talking her ear off directly across from her and Chakotay having somehow ended up sitting next to her, she was too ill at ease for much conversation. Thankfully, Tom Paris' cheery voice floated over from where he sat with B'Elanna, addressing the Captain, "Captain, B'Elanna and her team finished the upgrades on the Delta Flyer today, I was hoping I could do some manoeuvres tomorrow."

"I'm happy with that, as long as the Ledosian Government is happy to allow you to test these upgrades in their space." The Captain replied, giving Ambassador Weltin an enquiring glance.

"I don't see why not Captain, as long as he complies with our flight laws." Weltin answered with a small smile at a jubilant Tom.

"Oh wait!" The Captain exclaimed, "Who is going to take Seven to the conference and back if you're busy Tom?"

Mallon laughed, "I'd certainly be honoured to collect Miss Seven in my own shuttle Captain, that would be the simplest solution."

Seven gulped in dread, three hours in the company of this man had made her certain that she'd didn't like him, how could she tolerate such a companion for three_ days_? "Dr Mallon, I don't think…"

The Captain politely shook her head. "It's not Starfleet policy for a crewmember to go on an away mission alone Doctor. I think it would be better if we used one of our own shuttles for transport…"

Mallon blinked over at her balefully, "Surely you don't believe she'd be in any danger Captain?"

The Captain blanched a little, "Well…"

"I'll take her Captain." Chakotay said suddenly before he was fully aware of what he was agreeing to do, then swallowed as he realised. Could Seven handle three days with him, considering everything? Could he handle that?

The Captain latched onto the idea before he could think about retracting it. "I think that would be best, thank you for offering Commander."

"But Captain…" Mallon began to argue in such an ingratiating tone that to Chakotay's ears it sounded very much like nails on a blackboard, "I don't see why the Commander should have to give up his time when I've already offered to…"

"I _said_ that I'm taking her." Chakotay said firmly, for a moment barely able to suppress a scary urge to bang his fist on the table. As he took in Mallon's defeated expression with satisfaction, he thought of the positives to this away mission. Yes, it would be awkward at first, but he'd definitely find some time to talk to her over the three days and hopefully she'd be more receptive to his apologies and explanations when she couldn't just run away from him, like on Voyager. Of course, even if none of that mattered, he doubted he ever would have wanted her to go with Mallon, Seven had already been kidnapped too many times before to take the risk.

The Captain cleared her throat as she shot Chakotay a strange look, mildly intrigued by his tone. "That settles that then, right Seven?"

"Yes Captain." Seven answered, perhaps a little too loudly as she tried to block out the roar of blood through her ears. Her chest hurt as her vision of a friendly, but distant, relationship with the Commander began to crumble. She was still vulnerable to him, that had been proved to her now, and she just couldn't afford to be! Yet, she couldn't find a way out, she was quite so desperate as to resort to taking up Mallon's offer. "Thank you for your help Commander." She murmured formally, not looking at him as she stood up abruptly, her chair flying out behind her. "If you would excuse me, I am late for my regeneration cycle." She said rapidly.

The Doctor, seeing her confusion, supported her. "Yes Captain, she's had a malfunction today, regeneration would do her some good."

The Captain gave Seven, who was appropriately pale, a worried look. "Of course you can be excused Seven." She agreed kindly.

Seven then left them with little else than a quick nod to the Captain, but as the others turned back to their meal, Chakotay's stomach was sinking in guilt. He'd made things worse between them once again.

**A/n: Ugh, I think this chapter worked a lot better in my head than on the page, but I hope it's at least passable. PLEASE REVIEW! :D The next one will be better! **


	11. Chapter 11

**A/n: Thanks to everyone who reviewed the final chapter of "A Raven's Ghost" and also to xXBrightsideBumblebeeXx for updating her C/7 fic "Shreds and Shards". I beta-read it so I know that it's an awesome read, one of my favourites! **

Chakotay let a restive, uneasy, sigh leave his lips as he completed the last of the pre-flight checks on the shuttle he was taking to Ledosia. Now that he'd done everything productive he could to fill his time, he'd just have to wait for Seven's arrival. The nerves that tightened around his gut at that thought as he left the shuttle to stand impatiently in the empty bay irritated him and he was starting to regret his impulsive decision to volunteer to take her to this conference. If the mere idea of spending a flight alone with her put him on edge, how was he supposed to relieve the burden of telling her about his, initially at least, unintentional spying, with any sort of composure that might lead to forgiveness?

He was just considering, in the more unscrupulous parts of his mind, how he could get out of this obligation he'd stumbled into with blind stupidly when the electrified swish of the shuttle's bay's large double doors heralded Seven's arrival. She somehow managed to walk into a perfectly straight line towards the shuttle without looking up once from the PADD clenched in one hand. It took Chakotay clearing his throat before she even registered his presence, but her reaction was strong when she did see him. Her head snapped up, her feet unconsciously stumbling back a step. "You're early!" she exclaimed.

Chakotay could've been offended by the incredulity of her tone, but when combined with her startled expression, such a contrast with her usual cool impassiveness, he couldn't help but be amused. "You don't have sole prerogative on being punctual you know Seven." He teased, surprised by how easily both the jest and his wry smile came to his lips so soon after being so confused over her.

Seven kept her eyes on him for an instant, her cheeks tingeing with the palest of blush pinks in that split second, before her head ducked downward as it did when she feared an error, occupational or social. "I meant no offence Commander." She said hastily.

Chakotay sighed guiltily; obviously she wasn't prepared for the gentle banter he'd coaxed out of her the day before. Sometimes he wondered if that conversation in the Mess Hall had been a dream, or even a holodeck programme of his own. "I know that Seven." He assured her softly, giving her a careful smile, "To be honest, you would have almost certainly beaten me here if I didn't think of doing the pre-flight checks beforehand."

Seven relaxed at bit at, taking a deep breath as her eyes swept over the shuttle. "An efficient strategy Commander." She said approvingly, only now really meeting his gaze, "I presume we can then leave earlier than expected?"

"As soon as you're ready." Chakotay answered simply.

Seven picked up the small case she'd left at her feet, Chakotay thought that it looked more like a toolbox that a suitcase, but knowing Seven it probably served as both. "I am ready." She told him brusquely, already striding for the shuttle's door.

Chakotay chuckled to himself as he followed her. "Okay then." He agreed, but when he saw her stiffen a little at the sound of his voice, seriousness came over him again and he reached out for her arm. "Seven…" He started, gripping her arm to snare her full attention, "You're okay with me taking you to this conference aren't you?"

Seven blinked at him in bemusement. "Of course I am Commander. I know you are a very capable pilot and your offer made my travelling to the conference feasible." Her eyes narrowed as she scrutinised his face intently, searching his expression for an answer to her own question which she didn't dare voice, _why_ had he volunteered so fervently to give up his shore leave in favour of taking her to this conference? "Why do you ask?" she queried, her curiosity partially winning out.

Chakotay shrugged a little too quickly, dropping her arm like a dead weight. "No reason." He replied, cursing himself as a coward as he did so, "You just seemed a little…upset about it last night."

"Upset?" Seven echoed, biting her lip as she swallowed and tried to enforce a calm demeanour over her features. "Not at all. As the Doctor said, I was in need of regeneration, that's all."

"Yes, of course." Chakotay said quietly as he watched her turn sharply into the shuttle with un utterly unreadable expression on her face, sighing heavily himself he followed her. This was going to be a _long_ three days…

* * *

"So…what are you planning to do down on Ledosia?" Chakotay asked awkwardly as he kept one eye on the autopilot's readings. It was almost time to take back the controls, within minutes they'd be ready to penetrate Ledosia's atmosphere and he wanted to draw some sort of conversation from Seven before his attention had to be fully diverted from her.

Seven gave an uncertain pause behind him as she looked up from her PADD. "Discuss warp mechanics." She finally responded, not really intending to be rude, she really wasn't sure what else he expected her to do at a warp mechanics conference after all, but if her lame answer caused him to desist trying to start conversation, then that was a bonus. The prospect of being alone with him for any period of time was uncomfortable enough without the strains of "small talk".

Chakotay sighed through gritted teeth and glanced over his shoulder at her. She was still sitting seemingly absorbed in her PADD, as she had been in silence for the last thirty minutes of the flight. If he hadn't already known she was just studying warp mechanics in preparation, he might've wondered which masterpiece of fiction could engross her so much. He undoubtedly would've found the ride insufferable if he hadn't known at least part of the reason why she was trying to avoid engaging with him, and also if he hadn't sensed her watching him every few minutes. Somehow that was a comfort, although it bothered him that he found the embarrassment of a woman around him something of an ego boost. "I meant for fun, outside of the conference." He clarified.

"I doubt I will have much time that is _not _occupied by the conference." Seven informed him coolly before sighing to herself, "Did the Ledosians last night strike you as much fun anyway?"

Chakotay laughed, glad to see a little of her dry, observant humour seeping through. "No, maybe you're right." He muttered, thinking of blowhards like Dr Mallon. "That doesn't mean you shouldn't _try_ to have fun." He pointed out to her forcefully.

Seven's face had again closed up into a hard, impassive, mask, a habit that was really beginning to frustrate Chakotay. "Thank you for your advice Commander." She remarked with cold stiffness.

Chakotay blanched a little as he realised he'd again pushed her boundary too far, but he was unwilling to let her go completely, and as his eye caught the spectacular rainforest canopy that covered almost half of the planet, the other half being depressingly industrialised and not exactly inspiring, he didn't try to restrain his gasp of delight. "Look at that!" he declared excitedly, "Isn't it beautiful?"

"Beauty is irrelevant." Seven replied distractedly.

Chakotay spun in his seat to face her, rendered absolutely dumbfounded by that comment. "_Beauty_ is irrelevant?" he repeated incredulously, anger sparking within him when she gave a sharp, disinterested nod. "How can you say that? Seven, you've called a lot of things irrelevant over the years, but…" He forced himself to rein in his rebukes as Seven regarded him stonily, watching his reaction rather than explaining herself. An idea struck him and he quickly dialled some new commands into the flight controls.

Seven jumped as the shuttle lurched to the left, curving over the unpopulated wilderness instead of soaring over civilisation towards the allocated landing bay at the conference. "What are you doing?" she demanded of Chakotay.

"Showing you some relevant beauty." He replied seriously as he swung the shuttle down lower towards the surface to get a clearer view of the landscape below them.

Seven gripped the edges of her chair as she stubbornly avoided looking out the window. "I assure you that I can better appreciate beauty _after_ the conference Commander…" She began to retort through clenched teeth.

"We're here _now_…" Chakotay started to remind her, only to have his words unceremoniously cut off by a roar, the whole shuttle lurching and shuddering at the sudden impact. "What the hell was that?" Chakotay shouted over the near deafening groan of the struggling shuttle, trying to manoeuvre the best he could with fried controls.

"We hit some kind of forcefield!" Seven reported as she bent herself double over the sensor console. "It appears to be very similar to technology used by Species 167…"

"Did the Borg find out how to deactivate these forcefields? Because we're going to have to go through it, the engines are dying…" Chakotay said desperately as he got one last spurt from the engines which tossed them upwards but he knew they'd come crashing back down.

"I cannot even start to deactivate it from here…" Seven answered, fighting panic as she wracked through her mind for any solution. "We must fire phasers at the forcefield at a specific rate and strength!" she announced, immediately starting the process.

"Phasers? How will that…" Chakotay started to ask as he watched the red light of the shuttle's phasers hit but not fully penetrate the forcefield which was now visible to his naked eye.

"Just trust me and prepare to initiate emergency transport!" Seven shouted back, snatching up an emergency kit and clutching it to her chest with one arm as she used her other hand to direct the phasers for one final blast. "Now!" Chakotay's quick compliance with her instructions saved them both as he slammed his hand down to activate the transporter and they were carried off by it just as the shuttle tore violently through the gap the phasers had created.

* * *

The first thing Seven next became aware of was the pain of something poking her in the chest and upper stomach, then of the damp soil underneath her. Soil? Her memory, dazed by shock, returned to her and her eyes, which had been instinctively squeezed shut, shot open. She lay on a forest floor, on top of the emergency kit she'd thought to bring, but she could hardly discern anything else before rolling to the side and heaving air into her badly winded lungs. A sense of proportion quickly returned to her however and a chilling fear entered her heart. "Chakotay!" she cried out, forgetting to use his rank let alone disguise the complete panic in her voice, "Chakotay!"

A raspy, winded cough answered her before his words filled her with relief. "I'm over here Seven!"

Seven realised that his voice was, thankfully, very close to her and scrambled frantically up to her feet, almost breathing a hysterical laugh when she reached her full height and saw that he laid mere metres away from her. "Are you damaged?" she gasped out anxiously as she headed towards him.

"I think I've broken my ankle." He admitted, but was still nimble enough with his upper body as he sat up awkwardly to catch Seven as she stumbled in her haste to get to him. "Are you okay?"

Seven felt her face grow hot, even more ludicrous in this situation, as his arms steadied her but quickly shook him off and straightened up as she assessed herself for injury. Apart from where the emergency kit had slammed into her during transport, which was sure to leave a few bruises, and some tears to her biosuit, she was fine. "I am undamaged."

"That's good." Chakotay breathed in relief as she turned away from him to rescue the emergency kit. "That was a good idea back there."

Seven gave a bitter, broken sigh as she knelt by his leg, which was bent at a worryingly unnatural angle, and began to scan it with one of the two tricorders from the kit, handing him the other. "I should have been able to see that forcefield long before we…"

Chakotay was struck by the frustration and guilt in her voice and interrupted sharply. "Hey, we're alive aren't we?" He peered at her intensely, "You saved us both, don't beat yourself up over something you never could have predicted." His mouth twisted in anger, "The Ledosians didn't exactly warn us…"

Seven's head dipped, her face hidden by some of her golden hair than had been pulled partially loose by the chaotic transport. She was glad of that; she didn't want him to see how much his comforting words had affected her. "You were correct, your ankle is fractured." She said briskly as she stood up and moved back from him hurriedly. "As for the Ledosians, they must've known about the shield, but I highly doubt they control it, it is far too advanced and probably older than their civilisation."

"Someone, maybe Species 167 like you said, put this forcefield here and then left again?" Chakotay theorised.

"That is a possible explanation." Seven agreed before sighing again. "I think I may be able to use the shuttle wreckage to deactivate the forcefield, or at least break through it enough to transmit a message to Voyager."

"Great." Chakotay said; hope entering him again before he glanced around them in dismay. "Where would this wreckage be?" he asked, almost reluctant to know.

"Anywhere within the area the forcefield covers, which is half the planet." Seven answered mercilessly, although despondent herself. Taking a bracing breath however, she tried to think positively. "But it is most likely to be near the hole the phasers punched through, which should mean it is within a few square miles of our location."

Chakotay studied the dense forest around them, they'd be lucky to cover a mile a day in such conditions, and that was if his ankle wasn't broken and they knew where to look. "Well…" He began bravely as he tried to stand up, "I guess we'd better get a move on then if we want to make your conference."

Seven ignored his remark about the conference as she saw his left leg buckle on its damaged ankle and a groan of pain escaped his stubbornly stoic mouth. "You will need assistance to walk, I will help you."

Chakotay looked her up and down as he sank unwillingly back to the soft ground. She was an undeniably fit, even athletic, woman but he was still significantly taller, as well as several kilos heavier, than her and he doubted she could take his weight for long as they'd need to travel. The daunted flicker that crossed Seven's face told him she was the making the same conclusion, but she still resolutely came to his left side and slung her arm around his back. "My implants give me enhanced strength." She stated, addressing his doubts as if he'd spoken them out loud, "We also do not appear to have another choice."

"I'll give you that one." Chakotay muttered with a dry laugh, then a painful groan, as he put his arm around her and let her take his weight as he tried to hop forward, "Let's go."

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	12. Chapter 12

Seven mentally cursed her high heeled boots as she struggled to stay stable on the soggy forest floor but she knew Chakotay was having even more difficulty trying to shuffle along on his injured ankle. He hadn't once voiced a complaint even as she dragged him along leaning on her shoulder, but she could see the pain of it etched into his face, so vivid that she could almost feel it herself every time the contours of the land jolted him. She could easily ignore the thirst that scratched at her throat as well as the burn of exertion in her legs but the numbness that had begun to effect the shoulder bracing Chakotay was more difficult to avoid and she was too slow to react when Chakotay stumbled over his injured foot and she couldn't save the fractured bone from having to take his weight. The breathless groan of agony that left his lips, although he hurriedly attempted to stifle it, made Seven wince in sympathy and guilt, "I'm sorry Commander." She murmured, immediately dismissing her own aches and pains to reposition herself more supportively.

Chakotay had to bite down on his lip to control his urge to grunt in pain as he stubbornly lifted his suffering leg off the ground again. "I'm okay Seven. It wasn't your fault." To his surprise she didn't accept this, glancing up at him sorrowfully from her place under his arm, and he could see from the deep-set frown which settled on her face as she then looked down at his battered limb that she again doubted the decision to move him. "We have to find that wreckage." He reminded her firmly, in a tone more suited to his superior role on the Bridge than his current dependent situation. "Are we any closer to finding it?"

Seven breathed a heavy sigh as she studied the tricorder she held in one hand. "I calibrated this tricorder to specifically locate any signature from the wreckage, we are apparently heading in the right direction but the nearest fragment I can read is at least two miles away."

"Two miles?" Chakotay echoed, his mouth curling in bitterly as he thought of the hours it had taken to cross half that distance at his snail's pace. He could tell by the sun's position above him that it was already well past noon, night might well fall before they found anything. "And there's no guarantee that the wreckage that's closest to us will have the component you need to try to get us out of here?" He asked, his voice unintentionally sharp as he tried to hide his growing despondency.

Seven's head, already bowed as she held up his exhausted frame, dropped lower in defeat as she shook her head. "No, Commander. As I said, the useful pieces of wreckage could be anywhere but with the hole I managed to create in the shield it is feasible that the main body of the shuttle is still relatively intact, meaning that our best chance would be to find that."

Chakotay sighed bitterly as he shifted to look Seven more fully in the face, ignoring the stabbing pain in his ankle as he did so. "_You're_ going to have to find it Seven." He told her reluctantly.

Seven stared at him in disbelief, her eyes narrowing as his words sank in. "I cannot just _leave _Chakotay." She stated with incredulous frustration, "You are injured! It isn't possible for me to just abandon you…"

"You wouldn't be, we still have working comm. badges." He pointed out, "Look Seven…" He ran a hand over his damp forehead as he tried to regulate his breathing to shut out the pain from his mind, "We both know I'm in no fit state to search for the shuttle right now, and we need if we're going to get back to Voyager." He watched Seven's jaw clench as she resisted the logic in his words and as her mouth opened again he somehow knew she was going to fight him, "If we're going to argue, can we at least have a rest while we're doing it?" he muttered to her wryly before she could speak.

Seven couldn't suppress the urge to raise her eyebrows at that comment even as she assessed his condition as objectively as she could. It made her heart twist unhappily to realise that he was right. His complexion had turned grey underneath the deceptive flush of heat on his cheeks and his breath was raspy with effort even when standing still. Leaving him might be a risk, but continuing on like this would be torture for him. "Of course." She murmured, unable to keep up the wry tone he'd somehow managed to maintain throughout this ordeal. Her eyes swept over their surroundings and quickly found a large tree nearby with a wide, strong trunk under a pleasantly cool canopy of green leaves. "Come on." She encouraged, forcing him to let her take most of his weight for the few paces to the base of the tree where she carefully helped him to sit down.

Chakotay allowed himself a relieved exhale as he sank gratefully against the tree, but still watched Seven's pensive face as she knelt beside him, trying to arrange his twisted limb as comfortably as possible. He bravely disguised a wince, knowing that she was already deeply reluctant to leave him, and tried to reassure her. "I'll be fine, I'll just sit here until you come back with good news."

Seven blinked painfully as he smiled at her, her heart and mind fighting a violent battle within her. The latter knew that the only rational choice was for her to leave as he asked, but her emotions fought and resented this conclusion. "Yes." She agreed robotically as she scanned him with the tricorder, almost dropping it when she saw his temperature. Longing to disprove the reading, she thoughtlessly pressed her hand to his forehead, flinching when she felt how hot it was even compared to her own sweaty palm.

Chakotay saw the flicker of fear running over her face and guessed what it meant. "A fever?" he whispered, leaving the obvious answer, infection, left unsaid.

"Slight." Seven muttered, her hand, cool to his dazed senses, sliding gently down his cheek before she withdrew it. She cringed herself when she realised what she'd done. There were certainly less…intimate places to check for a temperature than his face! Pushing her irrelevant embarrassment aside, she visually checked over his ankle again, her stomach flipping over as she removed part of his torn trouser and saw the bone poking through the skin. "Commander…" She choked out, fighting nausea and guilt, "I cannot leave you like this…" She felt like slapping herself in frustration, if she'd been more careful in moving him…

"You'll have to." Chakotay pressed with difficulty, acutely aware that now he'd sat down he'd need more help than she could give him to ever stand up. Seeing her stiffen even further, he added emphatically, "I'm not exactly happy about you going to search on your own Seven, but like you said before we don't have another choice right now…"

Seven cut him off as she stood up swiftly. "I know." She replied quickly before reaching into the emergency pack she'd slung over her back while helping Chakotay and pulling out a small container of water. "Here." She offered shortly.

Chakotay hesitated, "You're the one who's going to be walking in this heat…"

Seven shrugged nonchalantly, "My implants have mechanisms to help prevent dehydration and with all this plant life there is sure to be a source of freshwater nearby."

"Right." Chakotay muttered uneasily as he took the bottle from her took a grateful few gulps of water, heated by the sun but still refreshing enough to be grateful for. He met her gaze seriously, "Keep your comm. badge safe, we need to stay in contact."

"If you require me I will come straight back." Seven assured him, glancing into the forest apprehensively for an instant as she did so.

Chakotay swallowed as he remembered how much Seven hated being alone, maybe he was expecting too much? What if she _did _get lost? He shunned these thoughts with the same rationale he'd given Seven, deciding to lighten the mood as she continued to hover. "That's an order Crewman." He replied lightly, almost laughing as he saw her brows furrow, he didn't think anyone had dared to call Seven by what was technically her rank before and it was enough to make her nod to him before she headed towards the denser tree line. Despite himself, he felt a chill of fear flee down his spine and called out to her, "You will remember where I am right?"

A tiny smirk pulled at her lips even as her eyes remained pinched with anxiety. "I pinpointed your position in my tricorder." She answered, "I also have a photographic memory."

Chakotay gave her a wan smile, "I forgot about that." He admitted with a teasing but tired laugh, forcing his smile to widen reassuringly as she looked at him in concern. "Good Luck." He added softly, barely able to catch her hasty nod before she turned her back and he then allowed himself to curl his exhausted body tighter against the support of the tree. The line between consciousness and dream began to blur as he watched her blonde head bob out of sight.

* * *

The next thing he was aware of was a rustle near his ear, which he blearily assumed was Seven returning. "Seven?" he mumbled, his voice husky with near delirious sleep, but as his eyes opened it was a very different face he saw above him. "Ahh…" He gasped out in shock, trying to move away before belatedly realising that he still couldn't walk. He now saw that there were two men, one significantly older than the other, his long white locks of hair brushing against the hodgepodge of undid fabric and animal pelts that made up his clothes. This man was staring intently at his leg, brow creased in thought and Chakotay saw now that they didn't look aggressive, just inquisitive. "My ankle, it's broken…." He tried to explain, hoping his universal translator would kick in if these people responded to his voice. "Can you help me?"

The younger male's hands moved in a series of fluid, expressive motions in response. Although mostly they were directed at the older man, Chakotay found himself watching in fascination even as he experienced disappointment. These people, although they strongly resembled the Ledosians, were clearly not oral, which meant that his universal translator was useless. The older man responded in a shorter burst of movements, of signs for it was obviously a full language, and then knelt calmly to manipulate Chakotay's leg, which made him cry out in pain. The younger man touched his arm sympathetically as the older one nodded in understanding of the situation. Chakotay smiled at them gratefully, there were other ways than speaking to communicate after all.

Just then however, his comm. badge leapt into life with a loud beep, causing the newcomers to jump back from him in shock. "Seven of Nine to Chakotay." Seven's voice echoed through the badge with her usual stoic clarity, "Seven of Nine to Chakotay…" The younger man reacted then and snatched the badge from Chakotay's uniform in a panic before crushing it with the older man's wooden walking staff.

"Damn." Chakotay breathed in frustration as he watched the shattered badge splutter out one last syllable of Seven's hail before falling silent.

* * *

Seven irritably shoved her hair out of her face as she clambered over another moss covered, rotten log in her determination to directly follow her tricorder's readings. Her pace hadn't let up since she'd left Chakotay despite the tiredness gnawing at her and she had no intention of slowing down. The faster she found the shuttle the quicker Chakotay could be attended to in the comfort of Voyager, she'd forgotten all thoughts of attending the conference. In reality, she hadn't walked far, however drained her body and mind felt, and was no more than half an hour away from Chakotay's location, but her anxiety still seemed to build with every step forward she took…

A shrill beep from her tricorder abruptly alerted her to a piece of wreckage within a few metres and she stumbled over to it eagerly, hope and then disappointment flooding her in equal measure as she found only a charred and bent section of the hull, about the length and breath of her forearm. Yes, it in itself was useless to her but it still gave her an idea of where the main wreckage site could be. She methodically scanned the fragment and marked on her tricorder exactly where she'd found it before deciding to give Chakotay an update as well as check on him. "Seven of Nine to Chakotay." She announced clearly down her badge, every muscle in her body tensing irrationally when he didn't reply. "Seven of Nine to Chakotay." She repeated, a little more shakily, before gasping in fear as she heard a low crackle of foreboding from the other end. "Chakotay, answer me!" she exclaimed fearfully down the line, hardly giving herself a chance to gather up both the fragment and the emergency pack before she sprinted off the way she had come.

**A/n: I hope my characterisation and plotting is okay in this chapter, I couldn't really remember their exact interactions in this part of the actual episode to use as a basis. **


	13. Chapter 13

**A/n: I'm sorry everyone, I intended to have this chapter finished days ago, but it's been a little hectic for me the last couple of days. I hope you all like it anyway. I've really enjoyed reading "Relative Human Errors" (No relation to this fic, lol). It's the new C/7 fic by Anniexus. Chapter 4 was particularly amazing! :)**

Chakotay stifled his grunt of pain sheepishly as the healer's hands fell away from his ankle, instead gamely tried to return the older man's reassuring smile. "Thank you." He murmured gratefully, having to hope that his expression conveyed the meaning of the word these people couldn't understand. It seemed to work, the man's gaze was warm with understanding as he rose from his crouched position by Chakotay's leg, now bound up in a skilful splint he'd made, and he even gave Chakotay's shoulder an almost fatherly pat before moving away. Even without the benefit of a shared language, Chakotay thought wryly, the Doctor could learn a thing or two from these people on bedside manner. In fact, their knowledge of medicine seemed impressive too, he couldn't help studying with some admiration what they'd managed to do with his ankle, which now lay as straight as his uninjured leg, if bound up by a wooden splint and bandages made from a strangely flexible leaf, as broad as those on coconut palms, which was having a pleasantly cooling effect on the torn, angry skin underneath. Of course, he wasn't a doctor, so he had no idea if these measures, and the soothing herbal balms they'd first applied, were truly helping his injury, but since the pain in his ankle had ceased burning as a raging fire through his nerves, inescapable even in unconsciousness, and was now a dulled, if still constant, throb, he wasn't about to resist the attention. Seven, no doubt, would've declared it crude though. A surge of anxiety and guilt, feelings he'd been trying to keep restrained at the back of his mind, overwhelmed him at the thought of Seven. He still had no idea where she was, what she as doing, nor any way to contact her. He dreaded to even imagine what she would think when she returned to where her photographic memory had placed him to find him gone.

He shook his head to try to dislodge these prowling fears, there wasn't anything he could do about it now, he couldn't go back, didn't even remember where exactly she'd left him. He'd just have to hope that Seven was a good detective when armed with her tricorder and would find him. Although, in her logical, unsentimental mind, it was probably more efficient that she work on lowering this shield and hailing Voyager than locating him, but he believed she would put efficiency aside for once, for him.

To distract himself from these intense thoughts, he again focused on his surroundings. Thankfully it was easy to do, the village itself was fascinating, with its inhabitants popping constantly in and out of an obviously intricate cave network embedded into a cliff with loomed over the forest floor and dripped with plant-life, and then there was the encampment he sat in now, surrounding the caves in a semi-circle of open hearths and simple tents. This scene was merely a backdrop though, for the people who lived in it. Chakotay wasn't sure what to keep his eyes on: the old healer that had helped him, now intently carving a branch with a knife, the young men who came careening in with hands grasping newly caught animals or nets swollen with fish, the women who snatched these spoils away and set to the tasks of skinning or smoking it, the young girls who were laden down with baskets of fruit and grain, or the children who watched _his_ every move as intently as he studied theirs. The constant flow of their sign language through the whole group was unbelievably vivid, but he'd been watching for so long that he could see a pattern, and could probably make a guess on certain meanings, "no", "yes", "thank you". He laughed aloud at the route his thoughts were taking, earning many curious stares from the people around him; it struck him as maddeningly ironic that something as outside his interest as a warp mechanics conference had led to him indulging in his neglected passion for anthropology. If he wasn't facing the prospect of being stranded here and if he knew for sure Seven was safe, he would undoubtedly be enjoying himself…

A frantic scuffle in the undergrowth somewhere behind him, then the slapping cracks of branches being pushed unthinkingly aside, pulled him out of her reverie and made him struggle to twist around to face the sound with just as much curiosity as the people around him. He half expected it to be kids playing around, but as he saw a pair of unmistakable pale blue eyes squinting desperately through the greenery he realised with a wave of relief who was causing the commotion. "Seven?" he called out loudly, "I'm over here!"

"Chakotay!" Seven immediately replied breathlessly, almost as a desperate cry, before appearing directly in front of him, although still half disguised by the vibrant plants around her. "What happened?" she asked sharply as she struggled to calm herself, "I thought…"

Chakotay winced guiltily as he heard the quaver of fear in her voice. Yes, he'd done her a disservice in even thinking for a second she wouldn't look for him, but the relief he'd seen flood over her entire face in that unguarded moment when they'd first locked eyes had surprised him, despite what he knew of her private feelings. "I'm okay Seven." He assured her gently, gesturing to the people around him, "These people found me and brought me back to this camp…" He started to explain.

Seven froze as she registered the natives' presence around them for the first time and was frustrated by her own carelessness at not seeing them before now, Lt. Cmdr. Tuvok certainly wouldn't have approved of her lack of vigilance. She peered at Chakotay, mentally assessing him for further injuries and mercifully finding none. "They kidnapped you?" she asked tersely.

"They _helped_ me Seven." Chakotay told her firmly, sighing slightly when he saw that she still didn't believe him.

Disbelief wasn't the only emotion Seven was experiencing at that moment. After her initial relieved elation at finding him unharmed, anger was beginning its toxic build-up within her. She couldn't help but recall, with excruciating detail, the fear that had set upon her the moment she'd discovered him gone and the suffocating panic that had squeezed at her chest when she'd seen those three sets of tracks leading away. Now that those fears had proved unfounded, resentment towards Chakotay for appearing so…blasé about the whole incident smouldered inside, although, if she had bothered to analyse what she was feeling more deeply, she would have found that what unsettled her more was the fact that she had felt such strong emotions about him at all, under any circumstance. "Then why didn't you contact me?" she finally retorted questioningly, unable to stop an accusing edge entering her tone.

Chakotay saw something resembling hurt in her eyes and swallowed, realising he was on something of a slippery slope with her. "Because they…broke it." He admitted heavily, grimacing when her eyes narrowed, "It's not what you think, your voice coming from nowhere just scared them." He shifted to show his ankle to her, "But we're not in danger from them, they really helped with my ankle."

Seven eyed the villagers apprehensively for a moment, Chakotay knew from the white knuckled grip she had on her tricorder that she wished it was a phaser, then warily stepped out from behind the protective undergrowth to come to his side. "Your injury does appear improved Commander." She conceded as she looked down at his leg, angry at herself for leaving these aliens to attend to him when that had been her duty. "But you are still in need of medical attention in Sickbay."

"I know." Chakotay assured her with a small smile as he saw her stance relax a little, "Did you find the shuttle?" he asked seriously, lowering his voice despite the fact he knew the aliens couldn't understand him.

Seven's head dipped unhappily as she shook her head. "A single fragment." She answered, and Chakotay now noticed the sharp scrap of metal she was holding awkwardly under one arm. "It is not the component we require, but I believe the search area can be reduced significantly." She took a deep breath, ignoring the wave of exhaustion which washed over her, "Now that I have located you safe and unharmed, I will resume searching."

Chakotay glanced up at the rapidly darkening sky, then back at Seven. Despite her resolutely stoic expression, she was white with strain and he could see her shapely legs shaking with the shock of overexertion. He wondered, with a lump rising in his throat, if she'd run all the way from wherever she'd been to here in search of him. "It's getting too late Seven, and with no way to keep in contact with you I'm not willing…"

"Do you still have your comm. badge?" she interrupted stubbornly, causing him to frown at her before silently pulling the wrecked badge from his uniform pocket and pressing it into her hand. Seven fought the disappointment that filled her as she held the crushed badge in her hand, the only outward sign of the sudden hopelessness she felt was her fingers closing tightly around the badge. "Irretrievable." She informed Chakotay shortly, biting back a sigh, "For such a technologically underdeveloped race, these people knew exactly how to destroy a comm. badge." She muttered.

"From what I can see, "technologically underdeveloped" or not, they've _adapted_ perfectly to their environment." Chakotay pointed out in defence of his new friends before regarding her levelly, "Look Seven, even if we did have a functioning comm. system, I still wouldn't let you keep searching. It's too dangerous to wander around an unmapped planet at night, especially alone."

Although Seven's depleted body, now shivering with cold as the warm sun rapidly set, strongly agreed with Chakotay's argument, her overwrought mind was exasperated, "Then what do you suggest?"

Chakotay tried not to be irritated by her flat, cold, even slightly patronising tone, after all they'd both been pushed to the edge of their limits by the day's events. "I think we should rest here for the night, recuperate and make a real plan, and then start searching again in the morning. If you've narrowed down the possible area like you say, then these people might be able to help us…"

Seven visibly stiffened, "I do not believe it would be wise to involve these people any further Commander, we would be violating the Prime Directive."

Chakotay bristled, "When have _you_ ever cared about the Prime Directive?" he asked a little too forcefully, unwilling to admit even to himself that her question had hit a nerve. In the hours since these people had found him, he'd been haunted by the question of whether he was exposing them too much.

Seven felt her hackles rise. She generally let any barbs thrown at her be deflected by her own indifference, and was ignorant of many more that the crew said behind her back, but she was highly sensitive to any accusations of hypocrisy, one of the traits she most abhorred in humanoids. "Whenever I, or anyone else in the crew for that matter, has ignored the Prime Directive it has been for the safety of Voyager." She reminded him hotly, forcing herself to calm down as she saw understanding and regret flicker across his handsome features, "Despite the obvious flaws in the design of the Directive, it is applicable here." She told him softly, "These people may be harmed if we involve them, both by our presence as well as our technology. We are disrupting their lives."

Chakotay sighed as he realised with a jolt that Seven's judgement was probably right, if a little extreme and harsh. He knew he'd have gotten the same lecture from every one of his old teachers at the Academy as well as Captain Janeway, although for the Captain to tell him such things would have definitely been a case of the pot calling the kettle black. "You're probably right Seven." He admitted tiredly, "We won't involve them anymore than we can avoid, but for tonight at least we have nowhere else to go."

Seven reluctantly nodded in acknowledgement of Chakotay's undeniable logic. She couldn't take him with her, and at least with these harmless people he was safe from any predators that may attack him in the open forest. Also, selfishly, she couldn't deny the weight of her own hunger and exhaustion begging her to give in and rest here. "True." She eventually conceded, surprised by her ability to return the wan smile Chakotay gave her in reply.

* * *

Chakotay's stomach growled in anticipation as one of the older women handed him a wooden mug of something hot from the hearth just outside the cave he now sat in. He smiled at her in gratitude and her hands flickered in a quick single sign before she cautiously moved towards where Seven sat curled against the cave wall to offer her a mug. Seven took it with a stilted nod, but made no move to drink. Chakotay on the other hand gulped greedily, so hungry by that time that he barely registered the sweet nutty taste. It was more a stew than a liquid, having the consistency of oatmeal, but since the villagers didn't seem to need spoons he held the mug up to his lips and drank. "Good, isn't it?" he murmured to Seven glancing over at her awkwardly, they'd barely exchanged a word since they'd agreed to remain in the village for the night. To be fair to Seven, she looked ready to sleep on her feet rather than talk, but he still felt the need to break this new layer of ice between them.

Seven sipped at the mug with a great deal more delicacy that he himself had shown. "Yes." She agreed quietly, before tilting her head at him enquiringly, her gaze intent. "You like it here." She said this as a statement rather than a question but he answered her anyway.

"Yes, yes I do." He replied, clearing his throat. "I don't like being stranded here of course, but I have to say that it's very interesting. I don't think I've ever met a people on this journey I'd like to get to know quite as much."

"They strike you as interesting anthropological specimens?" She asked, still watching him.

He chuckled, "You remember that, huh? A six year old's dream?" He smiled to himself as she nodded shyly. "Yeah, I guess you could see it like that, but really this whole place reminds me of so many trips with my father."

Seven's eyebrows rose, "Your father often trapped the two of you behind a planetary shield?" Her voice was teasing now.

He laughed. "No, not exactly, but since I was a teenager being dragged along against my will, he may as well have done." He ran a hand through his hair, "He would have loved it here, these people live as my people did for centuries."

Seven shifted uneasily on the cave's dirt floor. Now that she saw the rationale behind his curiosity it didn't seem as threatening as it had earlier. She was just too used to the Voyager crew's frequent bouts of explorer's curiosity leading them into trouble, as well as her own form of it causing her pain, to trust it as a reasonable thing. "Perhaps you can learn some more about them while I search." She mused, "_Discreetly _of course." She added hastily, not wanting to entirely undermine her earlier argument.

Chakotay turned to give her a sincere, open smile at that point, knowing it had taken her a lot to give him that concession. "Maybe." He agreed before looking at her in concern, "If you're really planning to search in the morning, you'd better get some sleep."

Seven's head shot up to stare at him. "Borg do not sleep." She stated sharply, as if he'd suggested to her to commit a crime.

"You're not Borg anymore." Chakotay reminded her gently, realising as she flushed that the words were weighed with more meaning than he'd intended. "I know you regenerate under normal circumstances, but…" He continued hastily.

"But these are not normal circumstances." Seven finished for him with a small smirk, "I will…attempt to sleep Commander."

He smiled at her again, little realising that it was becoming a marked habit. "That's all I'm asking for Seven." He assured her softly before turning away to finish his drink, drifting back into his thoughts. He'd believed for a while that day that they just weren't going to see eye to eye, but to his relief things seemed to have settled down between them again. He _had_ intended to tell her during this away, just because they weren't at the conference didn't mean he should chicken out… "Seven…" He began heavily, "We need to talk about something else…" He stopped as he turned back to face her and saw that she was already sound asleep, curled up like a cat on the ground, her head resting on her hands. His heart twisted as he studied her sleeping face, creased with an anxious frown, but still more relaxed than he'd seen her when awake for a long time, ever since she'd stopped her programmes. He supposed that sleep robbed her of the defensive mask she wore without fail, and though very glad to see that, it worried him how _vulnerable _she looked. Making an impulsive decision as he felt a strong breeze from the mouth of the cave hit his back and saw Seven shudder in response to the chill, he manoeuvred his body nearer to shield her, keeping his back to the entrance and his face level with, and facing, hers.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D This chapter was difficult, they spent a lot of it arguing! Thanks so much everyone for getting this story over the 100 review milestone in 12 chapters, I really appreciate it. :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/n: Thanks to Sweetdeath04 for updating her C/7 fic "Masks" on Saturday, I love the new chapter and the whole fic!**

Captain Kathryn Janeway breathed a sigh as she set another long winded report down on her desk and couldn't help but selfishly wish that she'd ordered Chakotay to do his usual, unenviable, task of sorting through the constant influx of reports, deeming what was worthy of her attention and passing it on, before he'd left with Seven but unfortunately she hadn't thought that far ahead when she'd given him permission to be Seven's chauffeur for three days. Oh well, she'd just have to remember that for next time, she thought resignedly as she reached for her habitual energy booster, a cup of black coffee. She couldn't complain really, she'd encouraged Seven to go to the conference and although she'd been mildly surprised by Chakotay's willingness to accompany her, as far as she knew the pair had never spent more than a few minutes alone and Seven wasn't about to win any prizes as a conversationalist, she'd been perfectly happy to allow it. Chakotay was very a tolerant man for someone who'd once waged a guerrilla war, often to the point where the trait irritated her more impetuous nature, but he'd always been wary of her ex-Borg protégé and Seven was exceptionally reserved around him, never showing, as far as she knew, the defiant streak herself and the Doctor saw a little too much of at times. However, she'd been detecting subtle changes in their relationship ever since she'd given Chakotay that ill-fated order to monitor Seven's holodeck use. The fact that Chakotay had then had the nerve to clam up about what Seven had been doing, she'd now come to suspect that he'd never heeded her request at all, still irked her, but if it led to two of the most complex characters on her crew being on friendly terms then she could content herself.

She spluttered in disgust as she brought her anticipated coffee to her lips and was met only the dregs, a few ice cold, congealing replicated coffee granules staining her favourite mug. The Doctor might often lecture her over the extent of her caffeine addiction but even she wasn't that desperate, not tonight anyway. As she stood up slowly, dragging her cramped, complaining muscles out from behind her desk with the cup in hand, she debated whether to chance going down to the Mess Hall to try one of Neelix's homebrewed coffee substitutes or to use up a few precious replicator rations on a refill. One glance down at her overflowing desk told her she'd didn't have time for the Mess Hall, a conclusion her taste buds were grateful for, and she made her made over to the replicator, just dialling in the instructions as her comm. badge beeped. "Janeway here."

It was Ensign Simmonds of the Bridge's Delta shift who replied, "The Ledosian Ambassador is hailing us Captain. He's asking to speak to you."

Janeway sighed in exasperation as her coffee appeared in the replicator, hot and steaming. She supposed she'd have to wait just a little while longer for her peace and quiet. "Patch him through to my Ready Room Ensign." She ordered briskly as she strode back to her desk and positioned herself in front of her own personal comm. screen. Fixing a polite smile on her face as Weltin's own pudgy one appeared on the screen, she greeted him pleasantly, "Good Evening Ambassador, what can I do for you? I hope Tom Paris hasn't messed up the first of his flying lessons." Her lips quirked, thinking of Tom's mortification earlier that day when he found out he'd need to follow Ledosian law and complete remedial flying training after breaking an obscure flight regulation.

"As far as I know, he is doing all our legal system asks of him Captain." Ambassador Weltin replied before biting his plump lips apprehensively, something that immediately set the experienced Janeway on edge, "I was wondering if you've been in contact with your away team…"

The Captain's brows furrowed questioningly, "Commander Chakotay and Seven of Nine? No we haven't, I'd presumed they were busy at the conference. Is there something wrong?"

"That's just it Captain, your people have not arrived at the conference…" Weltin began.

"What?" Janeway cut in anxiously, "What's happened to them Ambassador?"

"I…I don't know." Weltin stammered, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. "We've seen…no trace of them since their shuttle entered orbit initially."

Janeway's eyes narrowed as her gut told her she wasn't getting the whole story. "Is there something you're not telling me Mr Weltin?"

Caught out, Weltin cleared his throat. "Well, our authorities have good reason to believe your people may be with the Ventu."

"The Ventu?" The Captain echoed, impatiently waiting for him to elaborate. "Kidnappers? Terrorists?"

Weltin shook his head vehemently, "Oh no, nothing like that, they're completely harmless. Related to us in fact, a link in our evolutionary chain. They live as hunter-gathers in the rainforests on the far side of our planet, we used to live just like them before the industrialisation of half a millennia ago."

"How could a group of unindustrialised, rural forest dwellers have my people?" The Captain asked incredulously, "They were in a shuttle flying to the conference…"

"Ahh, there's something I neglected to mention about the Ventu, their habitat as it were, is completely encircled by a protective shield. An advanced alien species erected centuries ago without our consent, apparently they believed we'd "pollute" the Ventu's way of life…" He trailed off as Janeway glared at him, "This shield is impenetrable, we've been locked out of a third of our planet's land mass for almost four centuries now. Any vessel which has ever hit the shield, accidently or otherwise, has disintegrated on impact…"

Janeway felt her stomach twist sickeningly and was suddenly glad she hadn't drunk that cup of coffee as bile rose in her throat. "Are you telling me you think my people may have been _vaporised_?"

"If they did hit the shield, then yes Captain." Weltin answered regretfully.

The Captain snapped up onto her feet, "I expect your government's full cooperation in the search for my people, your secrecy about this shield may well have endangered their lives!"

Utterly cowed, Weltin mumbled, "Of course, of course, everything we can…"

Giving into her anger and fear for a moment, Janeway cut their comm. link unceremoniously and hit her own comm. badge. "Red Alert. I want every possible scan conducted on Ledosia, surface and atmospheric, we need to find Chakotay and Seven _now_."

* * *

Seven's eyelashes fluttered as the heavy sleep she'd surrendered to began to leave her, but even as her eyes opened fully confusion still reined for a moment as she felt dirt beneath her and saw a ceiling of rock, blackened by smoke, soaring above her like a cathedral. It was only when she heard the patter of soft, steady footsteps and then focused on the yawning hole in the rock where sunlight streamed in that she remembered where she was, in the cave that made up part of the native inhabitants' camp where Chakotay had insisted they stay for the night. The thought of her injured crewmate instantly made her prop herself up by the arms. "Chakotay…" She called out worriedly, cringing as she heard her own sleep hoarsened voice, "Commander!" A tightening in her chest she hadn't really been aware of before relaxed exponentially as his laughter, deep and huskily warm, unmistakable, reached her ears. She shook her head in wonderment even as she felt a smile tug stubbornly at her lips; he really did like it here! At least he was okay and that allowed her to rise a little slower, rubbing at her bleary eyes and trying to salvage her dishevelled hair. Sleep was so inefficient when compared to regeneration! When reactivated from her alcove, she could be fully alert within two seconds…

She spotted Chakotay almost as soon as she left the cave, basking in the pleasant morning sun and, unintentionally or not, the rapt attention of every alien in the camp. The youngest toddler to the most aged man, and everyone in between, was watching his every move as he scratched markings in the ground with a stick. Almost as soon as she stepped out into the full light herself however, she felt all of those curious gazes transfer to her. Just as she froze nervously, Chakotay glanced up from what he was doing and saw her, a reassuring smile immediately spreading wide over his face, settling Seven's nerves a little even before he spoke. "Good morning Seven."

"Good morning." Seven replied, inclining her head slightly in acknowledgement before frowning at him quizzically, "You did not wake me."

Chakotay gave a small shrug, "I thought you needed the rest."

Seven was reluctant to agree, although it was undoubtedly true, to admit such a thing went against the grain for her. "Thoughtful but inefficient." She finally replied softly, "It must be mid morning by now; I could've spent the time searching."

"You'll need good light to spot the shuttle." Chakotay pointed out calmly before glancing back down at the marks he'd made in the ground.

Seven's interest was peaked, "What have you been doing?"

"Trying to collect some local knowledge." Chakotay answered with a wry grin, ushering her over. "They won't hurt you Seven." He assured her when she hung back, glancing at the people around them warily.

"No." Seven agreed quickly, striding over to him and feeling somewhat surprised that he'd managed to sound reassuring without being patronising, generally the crew made her feel embarrassed about her more unfounded fears. "Explain." She stated as she squinted at the squiggles he'd scored into the ground.

Chakotay bit back a chuckle at her blunt phrasing and pointed to what he'd drawn. "This…" He indicated a rough triangle, "…is the mountain we always saw in the horizon while we were walking yesterday, and this…" He followed a wavy line with his thumb, "…is the river we walked along. Now according to your calculations, the wreckage should be within a relatively short distance of both these landmarks, right?"

"Correct Commander." Seven confirmed with a nod, "But I fail to see how making an amateurish representation of them in the dirt will assist us."

Chakotay laughed, Seven certainly didn't pull punches. "Amateurish, huh?" he asked, eyebrows arched high, chuckling again when she had the grace to blush in response. "The drawing itself isn't important Seven, I'm trying to get these people to give us some guidance. They know these surroundings better than anyone and they're so curious that surely they must've noticed the shuttle crashing somewhere in this area."

Seven sighed to herself as she looked over the makeshift map, "Your idea has merit Commander, but firstly we have no way to communicate with these people even if they do have the knowledge, secondly we should not wish them to find the wreckage. It would be dangerous for them."

Chakotay grimaced in disappointment as her words sunk in, "You're probably right." He conceded, wiping away his drawings with his hand, "But we _can_ communicate with them." Seeing her doubtful look, he held up the stick he'd been using, "The old man who treated my leg carved this walking stick for me. This is "thank you." In their language." He clenched his hands into soft fists and crossed them at the wrists over his chest, bowing slightly.

Seven couldn't help but be impressed by his perceptiveness as she watched the aliens react excitedly to his attempt at their language. "No doubt you would've made an effective anthropologist." She murmured, acknowledging his smile in reply before refocusing on the task at hand, "Since your injury still limits your mobility, I will search for the wreckage myself…" She was interrupted by an eager young girl handed her a bowl of what looked like some kind of porridge and eyed it uneasily.

"It's breakfast." Chakotay informed her, "Try it, its better than most of Neelix's concoctions."

"That would not be difficult." Seven remarked wryly, making him chuckle, but catching his watching eye, she awkwardly mimicked the thank you he'd shown her to the girl, who grinned in delight. "As I was saying…" She continued stiffly as she picked at the surprisingly palatable meal, which seemed to be a mix of a corn like grain and some sweet nuts. "I will resume my search for the wreckage and you can remain here."

"Which one of us is in the command here?" Chakotay reminded her, feeling guilty as she blanched in mortification. "I'm just teasing you Seven. If I could come up with something better I'd suggest it, I'm not happy about you going out alone, but your plan seems to be the only one we have." He glanced down at his ankle in frustration.

"I will have my tricorder, so I should be able to avoid most dangers." Seven assured him, setting her bowl aside and tightening her grip on her tricorder.

Chakotay was dissatisfied with that, but knew it would do no good to show it. "Be careful." He instructed her firmly.

Seven looked at him seriously, holding his gaze. "I will be." She replied before distractedly pushing her hair, which was progressively falling free of her few remaining hairpins, out of her eyes but quickly realised it was futile. Ripping a bit of fabric from her torn biosuit sleeve, she proceeded to tie her hair back in a ponytail at the nape of her neck. Chakotay found himself strangely captivated by the deft movements of her fingers as she did so.

"It looks nice like that." He murmured without thinking, quickly clarifying when Seven stared at him blankly, "Your hair."

Seven forced her eyebrows up, hoping that would distract from the colour she felt flooding her face, "How so?"

Chakotay shrugged awkwardly, suddenly very self-conscious. "It just looks a little less…severe I guess. More relaxed."

Seven's head bobbed nervously as she stood to her full height. "I will keep that in mind." She mumbled in response to the compliment, before sighing as she looked out at the tree line. "I do not _feel _very relaxed…" She admitted in a shy whisper.

"Don't worry." Chakotay told her bravely, "We're going to get out of here. Voyager will already be looking for us."

Seven's brow furrowed, her lips parting to say something more, but she seemed to think the better of it. "I'm sure they will be." She said heavily. Without another word, she trooped out towards the deep forest she'd been studying so apprehensively moments before.

"Be careful!" Chakotay shouted out after her, scrambling to his feet using his stick to watch her go. He hated how small she looked as she disappeared into the dense tree cover and had to rein in a groan of frustration. If only he could walk properly! Suddenly he saw the girl how'd served Seven's breakfast start to follow her, only to pause and look back at him. Without thinking he made another sign he'd learned from watching mothers and children interact, "Go on". The girl grinned at him before shooting after Seven at a run and Chakotay found he was smiling in relief. Seven would have a guide with her whether she wanted one or not.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/n: Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed my new fic, "Contagion". I hope you all like this chapter too. :)**

B'Elanna shifted uncomfortably, the ripened swell of her abdomen weighing heavily on her thighs as she crouched down beside the charred and bent sheet of metal crumpled on the floor of Engineering. This forlorn fragment was the only salvageable sign, after a long night of searching, of Chakotay and Seven of Nine since their disappearance and as such B'Elanna was willing to tolerate anything if it would help find her missing crewmates, her friends. "Well…" She started with a sigh as she lowered her tricorder, "It's definitely _was_ part of the shuttle."

"Yes." Icheb, who was crouched along the opposite side of the fragment, agreed quietly before wiping away some of the blackened residue along the edge with his hand to reveal a faded section of the shuttle's identification code which normally would run across the starboard side. A grimace ran briefly over Icheb's face at the discovery, mirroring B'Elanna's own, but when he spoke his voice was level. "It appears to have been part of the starboard stabiliser."

"Yeah." B'Elanna confirmed with a nod, "But the fact that it seems to have been sheared off fits with our theory that the main body of the shuttle managed to get through the shield…"

"B'Elanna!" Captain Janeway's strident call echoed through Engineering as she hurried briskly towards them. Her face visibly paled as she saw the half melted segment of metal and her eyes shot to B'Elanna's. "Report Lieutenant?" she asked tightly.

B'Elanna awkwardly began to try to rise to her feet, giving Icheb a grateful look as he automatically reached out his arm to steady her. "As I told you Captain, we managed to find a piece of the shuttle resting on the shield and beam it up for examination…"

The Captain gestured sharply at the metal lying in front of her, "_That's_ all that's left?" she muttered thickly, "Is there really any chance…" She stopped herself as she noticed Icheb, blanching guiltily as she touched his shoulder in concern, "Icheb, I don't think this is a good place for you right now…"

Icheb was normally unfailingly respectful to the Captain, and to everyone else on the ship, but B'Elanna could see that Janeway had touched a painful nerve. He flinched back from the Captain and hot emotion flared in his eyes even as he regarded her stoically, "My _place_ is wherever I can be of most use in assisting the search for Seven and Commander Chakotay." He replied stiffly.

The Captain looked at him sympathetically, "Of course, but…"

B'Elanna decided it was time to intervene. "I need his help here Captain, that's why I let him stay." Taking a deep breath she continued her explanation, "As for whether there's a chance that they're down there on the planet, I'd say it's a big one Captain." She indicated the burn marks along the wreckage, "From what we've been able to tell, this piece was torn away from the shuttle and left resting on the shield…"

Hope filled the Captain's features as she interrupted, "And that would only happen if it got caught by the shield as the shuttle was passing through it, right?"

B'Elanna nodded eagerly, "We think so, the damage certainly doesn't fit with the rest of the shuttle vaporising like the Ledosians argue."

"That still doesn't answer the question of _how_ they could've managed to get through the shield." The Captain mused thoughtfully, "From what our own scans of the shield, as well as what the Ledosians have told us, it's impenetrable."

Icheb shook his head, "Almost but not quite Captain. I suspect this shield was erected by Species 167, and if that is the case, striking it with a particular phaser frequency would disrupt the field long enough for a vessel the size of the shuttle to…" He paused to glance at the broken stabiliser, "…squeeze through."

"Giving Chakotay and Seven enough time to beam to the surface." The Captain concluded with a sigh of relief. "But would Seven know to do that with only the couple of minutes warning they had?"

Hopeful certainty gleamed fervently in Icheb's eyes; his trust in his surrogate mother's capabilities was absolute. "I believe so Captain, Seven's knowledge of the Collective's database is much more extensive and in-depth than my own."

"I think so too Captain." B'Elanna agreed, "There's traces of an intense high frequency phaser burst on the shuttle fragment we recovered, and if anyone is capable of executing a plan like that it's Seven."

The Captain smiled in acknowledgement of their hope. "Yes, that's definitely true, and Chakotay would listen to her." She paused and met their gazes seriously, "Could Voyager match the phaser frequency Seven used to temporarily bring the shield down and beam them back?"

Frustration crossed B'Elanna's features, "I've already considered that but the shockwave from phasers as big as Voyager's would create a huge shockwave which might cause _us_ to crash too, as it is, I doubt the shuttle is in great shape down there."

"We just have to believe that the two of them are down there." The Captain told her firmly, "At least I have evidence of their survival to show the Ledosians now so we should get more resources, but either way I don't intend to leave until we have Chakotay and Seven back on board. Keep me informed of your progress down here."

"Yes Captain!" B'Elanna, Icheb, and the whole of the Engineering crew replied with conviction.

* * *

While, unbeknownst to her, Voyager intensified their search, Seven was continuing with one of her own. The increasing slant of the sunlight flooding through the trees as well as the internal clock built into her implants told her that it was now long past midday and in the hours since she'd left Chakotay her strong, determined stride through the awkward undergrowth had slowed to a leaden trudge as the wreckage remained frustratingly elusive. Admittedly, her tricorder had offered her a few promising leads but every time the readings would pinpoint a minor component, more fit for Voyager's waste recycling system than for building a pulse generator that would bring down the shield, or at the very least a crude comm. device. She tried to rein in the human impulse to "get her hopes up" but after consistently the heady rush of anticipation and relief only to have such thoughts completely dashed was gradually affecting her outlook on the situation. Earlier, she hadn't fully admitted to herself, let alone to Chakotay, how slight the odds really were of finding enough relatively intact wreckage to assist them at all. Now though, with disappointments feeding her doubts, her merciless Borg logic nagged her that it was most likely that the entire shuttle had been ripped into tiny, unusable pieces as it fell to the planet's surface. She stopped, suddenly frozen by the idea that her efforts were pointless, but her natural resilience, or perhaps stubbornness, soon reasserted itself enough to push her feet forward with renewed vigour. As she did so, the shrill beep of her tricorder, eerie in this undisturbed haven of nature, demanded her attention. A glance down at the readings was enough to get the destructive cycle of rising hopes started again, these energy readings were the largest she'd seen so far and indicative the shuttle's main cabin, or at least a large field of debris. Feeling a smile tug tentatively at her lips for the first time since she'd left Chakotay at the camp, her steps lengthened to an eager sprint. However, before she'd travelled a metre her unsuspecting foot was caught by a protruding tree root and, unbalanced, her body slammed flat against the rough forest floor.

"Ugh…" She choked out breathlessly as she struggled onto her knees, irritably yanking her foot free from the offending root as she did so and sighing as she rubbed her now aching ankle. Next time she went on an away mission she'd request appropriate walking boots and attire, her heeled ankle boots and tight, sweat inducing biosuit were certainly not suitable for a long trek. Forcing herself up on shaky legs, she tested her ankle, relief flooding her when it only stung slight in complaint as it bore her weight. She and Chakotay had no chance of getting themselves free from here if they both broke an ankle! As she dusted herself off she realised that her tricorder was nowhere to be seen. Scanning the ground anxiously, she spotted the telltale gleam of metal down a hole where layers of interlacing tree roots had degraded the soil. Desperately, she plunged her hand into the hole, but it was far out of her reach, and after a few minutes of digging at the dirt, the hole caved in and the tricorder disappeared completely. "No!" she cried out in frustration, her muddied hands curling into fists as she felt the noose of panic begin to tighten around her. Without the reliable guidance of the tricorder she had no way of finding where those power signatures originated from, but her mind was truly focusing on that as she looked around her, suddenly fearful. The canopy of trees above her, once benign in offering shade, now seemed threatening, giving her no route of easy escape, and the rustles and flutters of movement around her could no longer be dismissed as harmless with a wave of her tricorder. The crew of Voyager believed Seven to be anti-social, and she couldn't blame them, her apprehensions of doing something wrong had for years led her to avoid unnecessary interaction, but in reality her true fear was being alone. Having the tricorder with its stream of scientific data to cling to had pushed the phobia to the back of her mind but without it her irrational feelings of abandonment and vulnerability returned with a vengeance. In those few moments of kneeling on the ground, chest heaving as she tried to calm her racing heart, she longed for Chakotay, for anyone, and even desperately wished that she'd listened to his fears and remained with him at the camp. She'd probably be unable to even find her way back there…

The sudden appearance of two bright dark eyes staring into her face inquisitively brought Seven back to reality with a jump and a startled gasp before she belatedly recognised the young girl from the camp. "What…What are you doing here?" she asked in bemusement, trying and failing to hide the relief in her voice at finding a friendly presence.

The girl watched her lips move in fascination, her head cocking slightly at the sound of her voice, but she of course didn't answer. Seven sighed heavily as she remembered that this species were not vocal and tried to recall what she'd seen in the camp of their sign language as well as talking, hoping that her face could express meaning. "Do you know where we are?"

The girl's friendly smile widened and she began to move forward further into the forest, effusively gesturing for Seven to follow. "Are you directing me back to the camp or…" Seven stopped the rest of that irrelevant question leaving her lips as she watched the girl move through the almost impassable undergrowth with the ease of a bird through the air, she really had no choice but to follow. The only feasible alternative was to wander around by herself, lost and alone, and she was far from ready to face that.

* * *

Chakotay felt the nervous churning in his stomach intensify as he scanned the tree line around the camp for Seven's return, something he'd been doing semi-unconsciously since she'd left hours ago. The rational, detached part of his brain continued to remind him that it was bound to take her a while to find anything, and if she did she'd probably get so wrapped up in trying to salvage something useful from it to come back in a hurry, but at the moment his emotional side was definitely dominating his thoughts. He was responsible for Seven and no amount of rationalising would change that. What if she'd been injured? What if there were people living in this area who were more hostile than these kind people? Most of the camp's inhabitants seemed to have left for the time being, so he didn't even have the distraction of watching them to stop him from fretting and brooding…

Just as that thought ran through his mind, a large group of men and women trooped back in to the centre of the camp, their excitement evident in their visually descriptive language. When he saw some of them move towards him, the idea of asking them for help reoccurred to him, not in finding the shuttle this time but locating Seven. Maybe the young girl who he'd sent after Seven was staying in contact somehow. Making a decision, he drummed his walking into the ground to get their attention and then began to scrawl a representation of his crewmate on the ground. For a light-hearted, wistful moment, he considered what Seven might have made of his attempt to draw her, but he soon became serious again as recognition and then understanding crossed the faces of the people around him. "I need to find her." He told them, directing the sign for something like "want" or "need" at the picture. "My friend. I need to find my friend!"

One of the men who'd been watching him most intently hurried off and returned with one of the females, pushing her towards Chakotay. She had bits of metal hung around her eye on a string and her hand had been similarly decorated. Chakotay felt his jaw clench as he struggled to stand upright and saw that the men were copying his tattoo by having a clay mixture dabbed onto their foreheads. "Damn it, Seven was right…" He groaned in frustration. Their presence here was disrupting these people's lives, affecting their ways. Still, it was too late to completely erase his presence here now, and he still needed their help. He rammed his stick down on the drawing, "My friend! My friend!" A few different women, all accessorised to ape Seven's implants, were now thrust towards him but he shook his head in frustration, "No…" He started angrily but froze as he noted what they were using to mimic Seven's appearance. Metal, refined metal, and they could only have got a hold of that from the shuttle!

**A/n: This chapter was a difficult one, I've had to type it in lots of little sections because I've been so busy with preparing to leave for university. I hope you all still enjoyed reading though! PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	16. Chapter 16

Seven couldn't quite restrain her sigh of relief as she saw her companion's skipping pace ahead of her through the undergrowth slow to a measured walk. The sheer physical, and emotional, toll this day had taken on her had caused her innate stubbornness to wane slightly, enough for her to admit to herself that she was exhausted. Perhaps Chakotay had been wise, rather than inefficiently thoughtful, to allow her the couple of extra hours sleep this morning. Unfortunately, as the Doctor frequently reminded her, she needed to regenerate regularly to function properly for an extended period of time. The nanoprobes now beginning to degrade in her bloodstream were gradually bringing on a dull but persistent ache to every remaining Borg implant in her body, adding to the purely psychological burden she carried of being permanently on edge in this alien, wild environment. She shivered as she remembered the unrelenting panic of when she'd lost her tricorder. Despite having no idea if the girl was leading her anywhere useful, and the fact that her sunny, unconcerned manner was going against her own current mood and circumstance, Seven wasn't ashamed to be grateful for her presence.

Just then, the girl stopped at a gap in the trees, leaning through before beaming back at Seven with a delighted smile. "We have reached your destination?" Seven asked tentatively as she carefully made her way over. Part of her argued that it was pointless to talk to someone who couldn't understand any oral language let alone of from a planet a quadrant away, but she found that she now wholly empathised with Chakotay's attempt to communicate. It felt comforting, necessary even, to at least try. The girl seemed to read the uncertainty on her face and reached for Seven's arm, her gaze reassuring as she gently pulled her through the gap along with her.

An amazed gasp unconsciously left Seven's lips as they left the cover of the trees. They stood in a lush green clearing, bushes of berries hugged the ground and bright wildflowers lay colourfully underfoot, but the main thing that captivated Seven stood proudly in the centre of all that like a crowning glory. It was a waterfall, crystal clear but still mesmerizingly blue, which cascaded down in a graceful arch from the shining granite rock face which enclosed part of the clearing and into a circular pool framed by more flowers. She could feel herself relaxing as she took in the scene, she was unable at that moment to imagine a more perfectly picturesque place; even the splash of the water was rhythmical and calming. She realised, as she watched the girl have a similar reaction beside her although she must have seen this before, that perhaps this was the relevance, the power, of beauty. A wry smile passed briefly over her lips, the Commander had proven his point to her, though certainly not in the way he had intended. She caught the girl watching her expectantly and returned her smile, in a slightly more restrained manner, as the girl pointed again to the waterfall. "Yes, it's very impressive." She murmured, her gaze captured by the sight again for a moment, "But I need to find my shuttle, I can't remain here."

The girl, of course, didn't understand her, just pouted at Seven's serious expression before walking to the pool and scooping up a few handfuls of water to her lips. Seven knew this was a sensible idea and headed to the water herself, drinking the cold, deliciously fresh water greedily, the replicated drinks offered on Voyager couldn't compare with it. The girl seemed to relish her enjoyment and came to her side holding a handful of small maroon berries, gulping a few down herself before pressing the rest into Seven's palm. Seven eyed them sceptically, just because the girl could eat them didn't mean they weren't poisonous to her, but the hungry growl of her stomach won out as she rationalised that she'd need to eat something in this forest eventually and it would be better to take what the native people offered. Swallowing them all in one go, she was pleased to find that they tasted a lot like cranberries but sweeter, without the parched feeling in her throat afterwards. The girl grinned knowingly and brought her another handful before dunking her feet into the pond with a contented sigh. Watching her, Seven's feet, hot in her dirty, tattered ankle boots, gave a jealous throb and within minutes Seven had cast aside protocol and added her feet to the water, echoing the girl's earlier sigh of contentment.

They sat there in silence for a little while before Seven noticed the girl playing with a few round stones, giggling as they snapped back together every time she pulled them apart. "Magnetism…" Seven mused thoughtfully, "May I see those?" she asked politely, showing the girl what she meant by holding out her hand and making the sign for "please" she could remember Chakotay practising. The girl happily gave a couple of them to her and Seven tested their qualities, seeing which were positively magnetised and which negatively. She realised after a minute or so of study that the magnetism of these stones wasn't natural, something had triggered it, and the only thing she could conclude was that components from the shuttle were creating a magnetic field…

Dragging her feet hurriedly out of the water, and barely remembering to tug her shoes back on in her haste, she stood up and signalled to her friend, "Come on!"

* * *

Chakotay stumbled as his stick caught on a tree branch, but several of the people grouped around him immediately moved to stabilise him, all frowning in obvious concern. The entire population of the village seemed to have decided to go en-masse to the wreckage site, which had slowed down their progress significantly much to Chakotay's silent frustration. If Seven hadn't found the wreckage then he had no idea where to look for her… He took a deep breath to calm himself, leaning against a tree before looking to the medicine man who'd helped him and who helped guide the group. "How much longer?" he said tiredly, just to get the question off his chest rather than really expecting to be understood.

Something of what he was feeling must've shown however, for the man nodded at him sagely and pointed calmly at the hill in front of them. "So it's over that next hill?" Chakotay guessed with a relieved smile. The older man seemed to find his hopeful face amusing and Chakotay was suddenly reminded of his father giving him lectures about the value of patience throughout his childhood, Kolopak had often worn an identical expression to what he saw on his new friend's face right now.

Chakotay set off with renewed vigour, coming as close as he could considering his broken ankle to bounding down the hill as he heard the telltale sounds of repairs, clanging metal and muffled grumbles of frustration. Within seconds he spotted Seven's blonde ponytail and saw that she was crouched underneath what remained of the shuttle's cabin. "Seven!" he shouted to her eagerly.

"Commander?" she called back in a surprised tone, shock rapidly followed by intense relief flying over her drawn face as she scrambled out from among the wreckage and caught sight of them. He only saw a fleeting glimpse of those emotions however as her stoic, professional mask settled on her face and she headed towards him. "May I borrow your tricorder?" she asked abruptly, hands tucked neatly behind her back as if she were awaiting inspection at her console rather than standing in a jungle surrounded by smouldering shuttle parts.

_That's _all you have to say to me after hours of separation? Chakotay thought with a mixture of incredulity and hurt, having to take a sharp intake of breath to stop himself from vocalising that question in a reply. She looked up at him expectantly and Chakotay found a dry chuckle rising in his throat as he shrugged, holding out his tricorder to her, "Sure."

The impassivity of Seven's face faltered as she saw that she had offended him. "I lost mine." She explained, her eyes dipping away from his as it always did when she was embarrassed about an error.

Chakotay pressed the tricorder into her hand, smiling at her reassuringly as his moment of exasperation faded to leave him feeling guilty for putting her on the spot. She nodded in response to the smile and stepped back to watch as he surveyed the scene. "It looks bad…" He muttered when he'd taken it all in, glancing at her, "Can you do anything with it?"

Now it was Seven's turn to appear reassuring, although she explained the situation frankly. "I believe I can lower the shield. I found the shuttle because I realised there was a magnetic field across this area, I believe I can use it to disrupt the shield effectively but the shuttle must be moved somehow, I cannot access a vital component while the shuttle is positioned like this."

Chakotay grinned at her, "I think we'll have plenty of help." He told her, gesturing for his guides to come forward.

Seven shot him a confused look, "They followed you?"

Chakotay shook his head, "No, they led me here. I think they found it quicker than either of us." He pointed out the women who were wearing bits of debris to mimic Seven's implants and sighed in sympathy as she gasped in horror. "You were completely right, I'm sorry. We've exposed them too much."

"I do not think we could have done much to prevent it." Seven admitted to dismissing his apology and then glanced at him questioningly, "Although I fail to understand why they would imitate _me_."

"The same reason the men are painting my tattoo on their faces." Chakotay answered softly, giving her a weak smile, "Haven't you heard that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery?"

Seven shifted uncomfortably. "Perhaps." She conceded, "But I think we should try to keep them away from here now, it's dangerous. They could have been electrocuted on any one of their trips here."

Chakotay grimaced at the thought but sighed resignedly as he took in the size of the main part of wreckage. "I understand what you're saying, but once again, do we have a choice? Without their help we'll never be able to move the shuttle enough to bring down the shield and get out of here."

Seven bit her lip for a moment as his point hit home, then regarded him seriously. "Do you think you can give them adequate directions?"

Chakotay nodded firmly, "Yes, I've been able to communicate what I need to say well enough so far."

Seven took confidence from his tone and turned back to the shuttle. "We should get started then."

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D **


	17. Chapter 17

Seven studied her borrowed tricorder intently for a moment before refocusing her eyes on Chakotay and the villagers he was carefully directing to lift the main part of the shuttle. Chakotay must've seen the contemplation on her face for he shot her a gently questioning look, "Ready Seven?"

She held off from answering immediately, even for her quick mind interpreting the data the tricorder presented her with and correlating it with the real situation around her was proving a challenge, one she normally would have relished but was now tainted with worry for Chakotay and their helpers. Forcing herself to relax, the answer slipped confidently into her mind and out of her mouth. "Ready Commander. I need you to direct them to move it 1.5 metres directly ahead, almost where you're standing." She went to his side and showed him the details on the tricorder and he nodded briskly in understanding, allowing himself a small smile of hope.

"Right, I'll tell them." He assured her calmly, managing to move on his wooden crutch with an agile purposefulness Seven couldn't help but pause to admire. Stopping directly in front of the nose of the shuttle, still thankfully recognisable even after the impact of the crash, he signalled to the group that had gamely arranged themselves around the shuttle and were already holding it clear off the ground, their toughened but supple muscles straining but coping with the immense weight. "Over here, then lower!" he signed bluntly, wishing, as he knew a nervous Seven had since he'd proposed this effort, that he was able to give them more detailed, cautionary, instructions.

When they began to move however, he saw that however he'd mangled their language, they understood more than he ever could have explained. They bore their burden forward with a fluid, uniform calm, so in sync that no crew in Starfleet, or even members of the Borg Collective could've given them lessons in teamwork. In fact, Chakotay suspected that if the crew of Voyager had had to undertake such an endeavour there would have been muttered discord and griping rather than the proud and encouraging smiles these people exchanged. He heard a soft, awe filled, gasp from Seven as the shuttle was lowered to the ground on the spot she'd indicated and grinned widely at her, "Impressive aren't they?"

"Undoubtedly." She murmured in agreement before glancing down at the tricorder again, "That should be the correct position, if my calculations are correct…"

"Which they have an almost alarming tendency to be." Chakotay teasingly reminded her as he heard the doubt creeping into her voice.

Seven's only reply to that was a slight rise of her eyebrow before turning away from him to head for the shuttle. "Tell them to keep their distance at all costs!" she instructed him, her words echoing eerily as she disappeared inside the shuttle through an open gouge in the side.

"Easier said than done." Chakotay muttered to himself as he watched several of the fascinated people flocking to follow Seven inside, with many more continuing to scavenge curiously among the smaller scraps of debris. Eventually he had to resort to physically pushing the ringleaders back with his free hand, then scrawling out a "do not cross line" in the ground with his stick, which seemed to finally get the message across and they backed off. "How's it going in there Seven?" he called anxiously as he coaxed a playful young boy back to his mother.

"The relevant shuttle components have been recalibrated to emit a signal which should disrupt the shield." Seven reported as she clambered awkwardly out of her confined workspace in the shuttle, "I will activate now." Leaving a good distance between herself and the shuttle, leading Chakotay back with her, she remotely activated her contraption using her tricorder.

The effect was almost instantaneous. A sparking fizz resounded in their ears and Chakotay felt a sudden thickening in the air around them, now heavy, he knew, with whatever electromagnetic field Seven had set up to kill the shield. For a few sickening seconds, Seven feared that the technique had not given the desired results, but then violet, venous fissures appeared in the sky, widening, lengthening and blending together like ripples on a pond or cracks in a broken mirror. This visual spectacle, however amazing and barely believable, lasted only the blink of an eye and soon the forest had fallen back into its peaceful serenity. It was the scientist in Seven which propelled her to break the silence with a conclusion, "I believe it may have worked Commander."

"I'm pretty sure it did Seven." He replied firmly, his eyes filled with grateful admiration as he met her gaze, "If it hasn't, I'd like to see what it did do…" He added with an awestruck laugh.

Seven smiled at his astonishment, finding it endearing somehow. "Perhaps we should study the process more closely when we return to Voyager." She conceded thoughtfully, the tension in her gut beginning to unravel as his belief became contagious.

"I'm sure the Captain would give you permission in a heartbeat, Starfleet hasn't come across anything like this shield before." Chakotay answered warmly, "Give me your comm. badge and I'll try to hail Voyager."

"Of course Commander." She agreed politely, starting to pull her comm. badge free of her biosuit as she politely gave him back his tricorder, which he took back with an amused smirk. Just then however, Seven saw something which made her heart plunge in panic. Her young female companion, who had led to this place and helped her in so many ways, was innocently holding up one of the magnetised stones she'd collected earlier to the hull of the shuttle, her eyes fixated on the silver metal like a magpie's would be. "_No_!" Seven cried out in frantic warning, "Don't touch that…"

The girl spun around at Seven's tone, but the warning had come too late. At that moment her trinket stone came into contact with the shuttle and just as Seven had known it would, the electrified power of the field she had generated to free them was conducted through the stone and up into the girl's body, sending her flying backwards.

Chakotay heard Seven's horrified gasp, watched her hands flying unconsciously to her mouth, before he fully realised what had happened and stumblingly followed his stricken crewmate to the girl's side. "Keep them back…keep them back…" Seven whispered repetitively to Chakotay as she knelt by the girl's side and the girl's friends and family tried to crowd around in panic.

Chakotay had already taken control anyway, gently trying to calm and reassure the natives as he saw that the girl was breathing but also understanding that these people needed to care for her themselves. "Seven, let them take her back to the cave. We can all help her better there…"

Seven's elegant frame, hunched painfully over her fallen friend, shuddered in denial. "Moving her could cause more damage Chakotay!" she retorted sharply.

Chakotay ignored the accusatory note in her voice, realising that in her shock she was directing the bulk of her fear and guilt at him. He heard her breath catch as she finally remembered to breathe and slowly bent over her, straining to look into the eyes she held stubbornly away from him. "You could be right, but its dangerous for everyone if we stay here, you know that. We'll let them take her back to the cave and look her over properly, and if we can get through to Voyager from there we'll call the Doctor and get some help for her, okay?"

Seven's head lowered as Chakotay's considered and gently spoken but firm words sank in. "Yes Commander…" She mumbled faintly, only to be rewarded by the girl moving back into consciousness beside her, obviously dazed and with her hands burned but otherwise, by Chakotay's judgement at least, alive and well.

"See, she's okay. It mustn't have been a bad shock." He consoled Seven again as he signed to the people around them allowing them to come and gather the injured girl up in their arms. He was glad when Seven didn't resist and carefully put a comforting arm around her still quaking shoulders, although her face was disturbingly blank. "Come on." He coaxed in a soft whisper, leaning heavily on his stick to help them both stand up, but on feeling him strain Seven seemed to come to her senses and moved guiltily away from him, only giving him a tiny, ashamed, nod of acknowledgement before walking on ahead with the group, sticking close to the girl.

* * *

"How is she?" Chakotay asked anxiously, starting to rise from the rock he was resting on as Seven left the cave, gripping the tricorder so tightly that Chakotay could see that the skin barely visible under the metallic webbing of her cybernetic hand was white and bloodless.

"Your initial assessment seems to have been correct Commander, she is "okay"." Seven reported quietly, her ashen face not quite able to form a smile but her relief obvious in her voice. "I would prefer to monitor her for concussion, treat her burns and seek real medical advice however."

"We'll stay as long as we need to so that we can sort all of this out." Chakotay replied resolutely, not only thinking of the injured girl but of the remaining shuttle debris and whatever else they may have done to affect these people and their forest.

Seven exhaled, her stoic mask slipping for a moment. "I believe that would be wise Commander…"

She, and Chakotay's smile in return, were interrupted by the shouts of several unfamiliar voices nearby, then the crash of leaden, careless footsteps around them before the culprits showed themselves, a group of Ledosians chattering excitedly. The first one, wearing a ludicrously large sun hat and swiping intermittently at insects visible only to him, lurched forward and grabbed Chakotay's hand enthusiastically, "Commander Chakotay and Seven of Nine from Voyager I presume?" he asked eagerly.

"Yes…" Chakotay replied cautiously, unsettled by the group's abrupt appearance, "And you are?"

"Dr Mildic Favor of the Ledosian Anthropological Development Council. I'm an expert on the shielded side of the planet, formerly shielded thanks to you, and the Ventu in particular."

"The Ventu?" Seven queried uneasily.

"The people that live here, that's what we know them as." Dr Favor explained impatiently, "They're a vital link in Ledosian evolutionary history! Now, thanks to you, we finally get to study them first hand…"

"And what does this "study" involve exactly?" Chakotay asked with cool politeness.

Favor must've picked up on something in his tone for he coloured slightly, "I'm not sure what you're implying but we won't _harm_ the Ventu in any way, they'll be given every advantage the Ledosian Government is able to offer them."

"Yes…" Favor's colleague piped up, "They'll be offered every part of our civilisation, education, medicine, technology, spiritual guidance…"

Chakotay tried to disguise the frown he could feel forming on his face. "That all sounds…generous."

"What's generous is this forest!" A female scientist broke in, addressing Dr Favor, "All of these untapped resources…"

"Perhaps you are jumping to conclusions about the value of this area because you have been denied access for so long." Seven remarked stiffly as she watched the Ventu eye the intrusive scientists fearfully.

"Oh no!" Favor exclaimed, "We always knew the rich anthropological and geological data that lay here, we've studied it through remote scans for years, but thanks to you lowering the shield we can truly explore!"

"That's…very good to hear." Chakotay responded politely, moving closer to Seven as she backed away, her expression uneasy.

Suddenly, Seven's comm. badge crackled into life. "Chakotay, Seven, can you hear me?" The Captain's voice asked anxiously.

"Loud and clear Captain." Chakotay replied warmly.

"It's good to hear your voice Commander; we were searching for you until the Ledosians suddenly announced that the shield had somehow collapsed from the inside."

"That was my doing Captain." Seven reported quietly, still watching the Ledosians carefully.

"I thought so, good work." The Captain said approvingly, "Are you ready to be beamed up? Apparently the Ledosians have already sent a team down so I don't think there will be a problem…"

"I don't think I should leave yet Captain." Seven cut in, "There was an injury here while we were working on lowering the shield and I must monitor her. The Commander however, should be beamed back to Sickbay, he has fractured his ankle."

"Seven!" Chakotay intervened in frustration, "We'll both go back at the same time, you can't just be alone down here…"

"Do I need to remind you that rank has no consequence in medical matters?" Seven broke in, although her tone lacked her normal wry bite, instead sounding tired and mildly exasperated, "You are injured and require treatment."

The Captain, who'd heard this exchange with a mixture of incredulity and amusement, said, "I have to agree with Seven, Chakotay."

Air whistled irritably through Chakotay's teeth as he realised he'd been cornered. "Yes Captain." He acquiesced tersely before signalling Seven to cut the comm. line off. "I'm still not happy with you being down here alone, I'll get the Captain to send someone else down…"

Seven shook her head firmly. "Unnecessary. Bringing more people would only disrupt the Ventu more and you know I'm in no danger from them."

Chakotay gave the gossiping scientists a suspicious sidelong glance, "It's not the Ventu I'm worried about." He muttered.

Seven sighed heavily in agreement for a moment, "I will avoid them as much as possible." She admitted.

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D I'm really not sure about the characterisation in this chapter, or anything about it really!**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/n: Thanks to everyone for their reassuring reviews on the previous chapter, I feel a lot better about it now. I was going to write for one of my other fics today but my imagination seems to be addicted to this one at the moment. I hope you all enjoy. :)**

"I'm sure we could arrange for a fully qualified doctor to come and attend to the girl if you wish to return to your ship Miss Seven of Nine." Dr Favor said confidently as he entered the cave, studying its interior with barely disguised disdain as well as academic interest.

Seven didn't look up from where she knelt by her Ventu friend, firmly keeping her back to the man she had quickly categorised as a pompous irrelevance. "That won't be necessary; I have already received precise instructions from Voyager's Doctor." She glanced gratefully over at the complete med kit the Doctor had beamed down for her; they'd decided between them that it might enflame the situation if he joined her. The Ledosians were already displaying possessiveness over the land they had just "reclaimed" and Seven could tell that they wanted her back on Voyager as soon as possible, to let them conduct their "research" in peace.

Favor gave a slight chuckle behind her. "Isn't Voyager's doctor a hologram of some sort? I doubt he can be programmed to deal with the unique physiology of the Ventu…"

Seven bristled at the man's superior tone but skilfully hid her reaction by smoothly picking up a dermal regenerator and inspecting the girl's burns as she replied icily, "The Doctor's programme is ceaselessly adaptive, he managed to reverse my assimilation process. Can your doctors claim such a record?"

She'd caught him. "Well…no, no." He took a deep breath, as if recovering from a blow, "I meant no offence ma'am, I'll leave you to your nursing."

Seven smirked as she heard the man back out of the cave, seeing the Ventu around her visibly relax as his departure and grin at her in approval. "Thank you." She responded with dry politeness before turning the girl's hand in hers and healing the last of her, thankfully superficial, burns.

The girl gave a soft sigh of relief as new, healed skin weaved over the fiery rawness of the burns, but even as she did so she stared at her hands in astonishment before beaming at Seven in amazed delight. Seven normally would have felt a twinge of pity that these people didn't know of such technology, but today she was only relieved, even charmed, by the response. "I have repaired the damage, you will be fine." She told the girl softly, quickly giving an older woman she now knew to be the girl's mother a reassuring glance before beginning to rise from her knees. "I will leave now." She said solemnly, repeating the gesture she'd seen Chakotay use before he left.

The girl's face instantly fell and she plaintively grabbed hold of Seven's arm, holding her back. Seven was about to try to make her point again when the girl's mother began to sign to her quickly, her face understanding but firm. For a moment the girl appeared querulous, but then Seven guessed that her mother must've made a suggestion for the girl suddenly smiled brightly and ran off to the back of the cave. She returned with a large blanket folded over one arm, which she promptly placed directly in Seven's lap, making several signs as she did so.

Seven frowned in concentration as she struggled to interpret what she was being told. "You want me to have this?" she asked, almost entirely disbelieving, as she uncertainly fingered the blanket. It was unsophisticated, there were of course none of the poly-fibres ubiquitous on Voyager, but it was luxuriously soft and thick, deftly hand-woven and delicately edged with amber like beads which caught the light spectacularly. Even as she admired it however, she knew it would be wrong to take it. She wouldn't require a blanket, even one as beautiful as this one, on Voyager and months of works had obviously gone into making it perfect and useful for someone. "Our heating system is fully regulated, you must keep this…" She started to say, carefully sliding the blanket from her lap.

All of the Ventu in sight shook their heads fervently, none more so than the girl herself, who stubbornly pressed the blanket into Seven's hands. A reticent smile passed over Seven's lips and she found her grip on the blanket tightening as she observed the faces around her, a sadness expectedly prickling at her heart. "I will appreciate it and remember you all." She murmured as she stood up, now holding the blanket tight against herself along with the med kit. "Thank you." She added sincerely, signing the word at the same time and watching them say, "You're Welcome" in return before she swiftly tapped her comm. badge. "Voyager, one to beam up."

* * *

The Doctor was buzzing around her with a tricorder within seconds of her materialising in Sickbay. He heaved a sigh of relief within a few seconds and stepped back, prising the med kit from her hands as he did so. "Well, it seems what the Commander told me was right, you were the one who came out better from the crash."

Seven raised an eyebrow at him, "If that hadn't been the case, I would've been transported back here with Commander Chakotay would I not?" she reminded him, ignoring his sigh of exasperation at that reply as she scanned the room for Chakotay, "How is the Commander?"

The Doctor smiled knowingly at the anxiety in her voice. "He's fine." He led her from his office towards the back of Sickbay, where Chakotay sat on a biobed with his ankle now restored to its natural position, the remains of the splint and bandages the Ventu had applied now cast aside by the Doctor. "I must say I'm impressed with the Ventu's medical acumen. The salve they applied certainly prevented infection and I didn't need to reset the bone."

Chakotay smiled warmly, "They were impressive in lots of ways Doctor." He replied thoughtfully before addressing Seven intently, "How are you Seven? Were you okay down there?"

"I am fine Commander." Seven answered quietly, "The Ventu girl recovered."

Chakotay shot her an empathic, supportive look which didn't go unnoticed by the Doctor. "That's wonderful news." He remarked sincerely, earning an immediate nod of agreement from Seven. "How about the Ledosians? Did they cause any trouble?"

Seven's poised expression became instantly pensive, as if a dark cloud had drawn over her. "My impressions of them did not improve with time." She said shortly, although she couldn't completely restrain a worried sigh which told Chakotay more than her words had.

"The Captain has asked to debrief us as soon as possible, how about we go now?" he suggested quickly, eagerly starting to swing his legs off the biobed before glimpsing the Doctor's look of disapproval, "That is, if I'm given permission to leave?"

The Doctor inclined his head at this acknowledgement of his authority, "Your ankle has fully healed Commander. You're fit to return to duty." Chakotay took this as permission to leap off the biobed, almost laughing at Seven's incredulous expression.

She recovered her composure soon enough though, "If the Captain wishes to see us then we should go." She agreed impassively, turning towards the door.

Chakotay was intrigued by the blanket in her arms and opened his mouth to ask her about it, but, as if she could sense what he was thinking, she awkwardly put the blanket aside without meeting his eye. This, of course, only piqued his curiosity further. He knew she must've received it from the Ventu but didn't know why she wouldn't tell him about it, and even seem ashamed of the gift. From her closed expression however, he could tell that was a conversation for another time. "Let's go then."

* * *

"…and I honestly think the Ventu have the right to be left alone, shield or no shield." Chakotay finished his argument emphatically as he stood in front of the Captain's desk in her Ready Room. "The Ledosians don't have the right to impose all of these decisions on the Ventu without their consent, and they can't give it right now."

The Captain nodded sagely, lips pressed tightly together in thought. "I understand your point Chakotay, completely. The Ledosians have given me the impression over the past few hours, while we were searching for the pair of you, that those aliens probably had the right idea when they put that protective shield around the Ventu, but that doesn't change the fact that it would be a huge step for us to intervene." She inhaled sharply and sank back in her chair as she tried to process her thoughts, "It could also be argued that _we_ don't have the right to enclose the Ventu behind that shield."

Chakotay had expected her to make that point, "We'd be allowing them to develop at their own pace, in their own way Captain."

Janeway nodded again in acknowledgement, her eyes drifting over to Seven, who had yet to say a word regarding this issue, very unusual for her normally opinionated protégé and despite her resolutely stoic face, Janeway could tell she was troubled. "What are your thoughts about all this Seven? You've been awfully quiet."

Seven stiffened as she felt the eyes of both of her senior officers on her, her head jerking up defensively before she regarded the Captain levelly, "I do not believe I can give you proper advice on this matter Captain…" She swallowed slightly, becoming increasingly unsure. "I am uncertain as to what the right course of action would be." She admitted.

The Captain tried, and failed, to stop her eyebrows from shooting up. "It's not like you to sit on the fence Seven." She commented thoughtfully, "Do you mind me asking why now?"

Seven took a deep breath, trying not to feel disconcerted by the Captain's bemusement or how raptly Chakotay was studying her. A small part of her was irritated by the question, after all she'd just said she didn't know how she felt, but she knew that humans generally liked to explore such issues. "When we first found the Ventu, or more accurately when they found Commander Chakotay and I followed, I found them difficult to understand, let alone appreciate. I wanted to leave and was…frustrated by the entire situation." She paused to cast an apologetic glance at Chakotay, who answered by smiling encouragingly at her, "I did however, during my time there, come to recognise them as an intelligent, resourceful and compassionate people." She gave a tight, almost guilty, sigh, "When the Ledosians initially arrived, offering technology and advancements to the Ventu; I cannot say I was against it. They have a great deal of potential and deserve all resources they can get, such as education and medicine, but…"

"But?" The Captain echoed, sounding surprised.

"Yes, but." Seven answered in a brittle tone, her discomfort returning with the Captain's interruption. She knew she was going against expectations, she was generally the biggest promoter of technology and advancement, but as uneasy as refuting all her previous opinions made her, she knew she had to be honest. "I do not believe the Ledosians have the Ventu's best interests at heart, they may well exploit them and their forest, but more importantly I do not think the Ventu require any assistance. They have a fully developed culture of their own and are wholly self-sufficient. With the shield gone I fear they will lose that uniqueness."

She was surprised when she stopped speaking to find that the Captain was smiling widely at her, pride in her eyes, and even more disconcertingly that Chakotay was staring at her in an awestruck fashion. His gaze was so direct it made the blushes she thought she'd learned to suppress in his presence flare up on her cheeks. "That was a very impassioned argument Seven." The Captain said gently before her gaze moved to take in both Seven and Chakotay, "It seems clear, to me at least, that you both believe the shield should be restored."

Seven was startled at first by her conclusion, but found herself nodding along with Chakotay, voicing her thought had solidified in her the fact that she wanted the Ventu to be left in peace. "That doesn't change the fact that the shield is down now." Chakotay pointed out heavily, "I doubt the Ledosians will be convinced by our arguments."

"No…" The Captain muttered, leaning forward onto her desk as she pondered, "But it definitely goes against Starfleet regulations to leave shuttle wreckage on a non-Federation planet, so we _have_ to remove it don't we?"

* * *

Chakotay paused in his approach to the doors of Cargo Bay 2, wondering if they had a doorbell; it would be rude to walk in unannounced… This thought passed through his mind even though he'd walked in unannounced for several years without a second thought. He grimaced, no wonder Seven had created holographic quarters for herself, this place wasn't exactly personal, or even truly private. Taking a breath, and trying not to dissect his reasons for coming down here, he stepped inside.

She was standing at the room's only console, completely erect as if strapped to a iron rod, hands neatly behind her back. He doubted Seven of Nine would ever be told off for resting her elbows on the dining table as he had in childhood… Her voice shattered his contemplations of her. "Commander?" Her tone was neutral, although her metallic brow was arched slightly. The focus of her gaze was still on her console however, and Chakotay couldn't help but wondering if looking at him _always_ made her think of her simulations. Maybe that would explain why it was only in unguarded, emotional moments that she looked him straight in the eye.

"I thought you'd like to know that the shield is back online, Tom managed to beam back all of the shuttle fragments, including the ones you had to reconfigure."

Seven gave him a odd look, "Yes, I already knew. I've been monitoring the mission from here." Chakotay immediately cursed his stupidity, he should have known she'd do that, it was obvious! "I gather that Tom Paris is now completely banned from flying in Ledosian space. His instructor was not impressed by the manoeuvres he deployed to transport the shuttle."

Chakotay had to laugh heartily at that, and suspected for a split second that she'd added that when she'd noticed his unease. "I think he'll survive, I'm ready to give him a commendation for helping the Ventu."

Seven stiffened perceptively at the mention of the Ventu and shifted noticeably closer to her console. "Thank you for taking the time to inform me of developments Commander."

"It's a pleasure." Chakotay replied honestly, smiling at her, but seeing instantly that something had made her draw back into herself. He didn't even consider leaving, instead letting his eyes fall on the mysterious blanket from earlier, now carefully folded up on top of Seven's console. In a few of his long strides he was beside it, and her. "That's a beautiful blanket." He commented softly.

A muscle in Seven's jaw jumped before she shrugged noncommittally, "You can have it if you'd like, I have no use for it."

Chakotay saw through that but knew better that to bluntly call her out on it, instead gently pointing out, "If the environmental systems ever go down, you might get cold." Seven bit her lip in reply to that before silently nodded her assent, eyes low. Chakotay decided he'd get nowhere if he didn't try to dig a little deeper, "There's something bothering you isn't there?"

Seven flinched before openly staring at him in surprise, caught out when he held her gaze. "I am concerned for the Ventu's well-being." She admitted abruptly.

Chakotay regarded her reassuringly, "The shield is back up and you've seen they can look after themselves…"

Seven shook her head in frustration, "That's not what I mean. The Ledosians were there long enough to study the modifications I made to the shuttle, eventually they will be able to lower the shield themselves and the Ventu will be in danger."

"It's possible…" Chakotay conceded carefully, his heart sinking as he saw where her line of thought was leading her.

Seven's fists clenched on the console, her whole body hunching over. "If I had never made those modifications…" She whispered, her voice thick with guilt.

"We would still be stuck there!" Chakotay reminded her forcefully, realising too late that he had taken hold of her arm and was leaning into her face. Shaken by the jolt that closeness gave him, and by the sight of her eyes, glassy with unshed tears of fear and guilt, wide with shock at his touch. He stepped back a little too hurriedly, "I for one am happy to be back on Voyager." He admitted, trying not to notice how hoarse his voice suddenly was.

"As am I." Seven agreed sincerely, her shoulders relaxing a little.

Chakotay felt she needed a little more, though kept a respectful distance this time. "There's no guarantee that the Ledosians will figure out your modifications, nor was there one that they never would've figured it out if we hadn't been there. All we know for sure is that , for now, the Ventu is safe, and that we did right by them. We can't spend our lives worrying about what other people might do, all we need to worry about is doing the right thing ourselves, do you understand what I'm saying?"

Seven gazed at him levelly, suddenly much calmer. "Perfectly Chakotay." She murmured, her eyes dropping shyly at her use of his given name rather than his rank. "Thank you again for coming to speak to me."

"Anytime." Chakotay replied in the same tone, inexplicably lost for words and only able to mumble a quick goodbye before taking his leave.

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D I really enjoyed writing this chapter, as you can probably tell by the 3000+ words, and I hope you all liked it too! :)**


	19. Chapter 19

Chakotay realised his breath was rattling heavily through his chest as he left Cargo Bay 2 and had to stop before he reached the turbolift, his damp hands curling into fists as he forced himself to take stock. As the immediate, powerful emotions his conversation with Seven had stirred up began to slacken their grip the fog of confusion, familiar during his sessions on the holodeck with her, began to return, along with the impotent frustration he'd felt then. She was capable of so much, he knew that for certain now, not only of the stable relationships he'd seen form on the holodeck but of untold depths of compassion and empathy. She'd certainly shocked him with her argument in defence of the Ventu, careful and measured but considerably more personal than his own. He suspected that it had been the poignancy of her admissions that had swung the Captain in their favour rather than his more moral based discussion, after all, Janeway had ignored him more often than she'd heeded him over the years. He realised that he shouldn't have been so surprised, he hadn't been totally blind before, he knew Seven was fundamentally good-natured, could be selfless to the point of revealing a self-destructive martyr streak, but then she'd ruin that image of herself by saying something unbelievable like "beauty is irrelevant" and he'd automatically think of her as drone once more.

He sighed irritably as that thought ran through his head, angry at himself, and studied the dark corridor in which he stood, still speckled every so often with a patch of Borg technology which hadn't been removed, the legacy of when this section of the ship had been wholly assimilated, and grimaced. The whole crew had done Seven a disservice by penning her down here. Now that he thought about it, it was as if Seven had spent her entire time on Voyager on parole, ordered to become a full crewmember but also expected to subsist in a Cargo Bay which was essentially a Borg relic. The crew tolerated her attempts to become social but didn't go out of their way to encourage it. She was one of the crew but not part of it in many fundamental ways. He remembered, when he'd first watched her simulations, asking over and over _why _she felt she couldn't reveal that part of herself in real life. It had had saddened him then that she was too insecure, perhaps still too full of Borg pride to let go and be human, but now he saw that it had a lot more to do with the people around her than with Seven herself, holograms were safe.

He moved to step forward again, his legs suddenly leaden. At least this time he'd been able to reassure her and had hopefully helped her to accept and cope with the emotions the situation on Ledosia had left her with, she wouldn't need to bottle it up or confide in holograms….

"Commander, what a lucky coincidence!" Neelix's cheery voice bouncing down the corridor jerked Chakotay away from his intense thoughts. "I was just about to come and look for you!"

Chakotay frowned, feeling slightly dazed. "Why…why would you come to look for me down here Neelix?" he asked quickly.

Neelix chuckled, flashing his pointy teethed grin. "Actually I'm here to speak to Seven and then I was going to speak to you, now I can invite you both at the same time!"

"Invite us?" Chakotay echoed dubiously, the memory of when he'd unsuccessfully invited Seven to one of Neelix's gatherings, a cooking class, popping spontaneously into his head. "To what exactly Neelix?"

"It was Lieutenant Paris' idea really; I'm just helping out in my role as Morale Officer." Neelix answered brightly, continuing towards the Cargo Bay, "Come on and I'll explain…"

Chakotay moved to hold Neelix back from the doors. "I don't think Seven will…" He stopped himself abruptly; surely he'd learned not to assume anything about Seven by now?

Neelix must've seen the conflict in his expression for he smiled knowingly as he shrugged off Chakotay's hand. "I know that Seven doesn't find social events easy, but I've always believed she just needs a little coaxing, and that's my job."

"Coaxing…" Chakotay repeated thoughtfully, glancing at the doorway furtively before smiling to himself. "You could be right about that Neelix, you want some help?"

"Gladly Commander." Neelix agreed happily and walked with him into the Cargo Bay.

Seven still stood at the console almost exactly where Chakotay had left her a few minutes before, but Chakotay was gratified to notice that the Ventu blanket had been moved from the console to join the meagre collection of Seven's possessions by her alcove. She nodded politely to Neelix but couldn't restrain herself from cocking a surprised brow at Chakotay, "Mr Neelix, Commander."

"Good evening Seven!" Neelix replied exuberantly, "I hope you've recovered from your experiences on Ledosia?"

Seven paused for a split second, unconsciously glancing at Chakotay, before giving a slow but firm nod. "I believe so Neelix, thank you for your concern." She replied softly, "May I ask why you are here?"

"Well, _I'm_ here to invite you both to a little get together on Holodeck 2 being thrown in your honour!" Neelix announced, obviously expecting both of them to share his enthusiasm.

"_Our_ honour?" Chakotay forced out somewhat incredulously as he saw Seven blanch, "Why exactly?"

"Yes, I fail to see what we've done to merit…" Seven began, her cool exterior becoming mildly flustered.

"You were missing in action for two days!" Neelix pointed out, "The whole crew was worried about you and working on a way to find you. Of course your safe return needs celebration!"

Chakotay and Seven exchanged uncertain glances, unsure of how they could respond to that without hurting Neelix's feelings. Seven eventually took the plunge. "Mr Neelix, there's really no need to expend resources on my account…"

"Nonsense Seven!" Neelix interrupted, "Your shore leave was disrupted, you need a break, some fun, as does everyone else on the ship, which is why this party is being held."

"I am sorry that the crew's shore on Ledosia was cut short because of our situation." Seven responded, "But I've come to believe I learned more from my time with the Ventu than I would have at the warp mechanics conference." She didn't catch Chakotay shooting her a surprised and relieved look as she spoke these words; she was too focused on Neelix's reply.

"Even if you enjoyed your time there, which is wonderful to hear, that doesn't mean you don't deserve a party." Neelix told her, addressing Chakotay too, "It's being combined with Tom's celebration of his flying lessons ending, so it should be fun. You'll be the centre of attention after all!"

Chakotay decided to ignore Seven's slight wince, starting to like the idea of a party. "Which programme is the party being held in Neelix?"

"Sandrine's." Neelix answered, "It starts at 2000 hours and is completely casual, no uniforms. Even the Captain has said ranks can be forgotten at a party."

"It sounds great Neelix." Chakotay said gamely, "I'll be there."

Neelix beamed at him, amber eyes sparkling. "Wonderful Commander!" He began to turn back towards the doorway, "I'd better go and round up some more guests." He smiled hopefully back at Seven, "Please think about coming along Seven."

Seven gave him an obliging nod, an affectionate smile flickering briefly over her lips. "I will consider it."

Satisfied, Neelix took his leave, but Chakotay stayed where he was, watching Seven as she returned to her work. "Are you really thinking about going?" he queried in gentle curiosity.

"I might…" Seven began, her eyes uneasily scanning the Cargo Bay for a moment and falling again on the Ventu blanket, "It may prove a…"

"Good distraction?" Chakotay filled in, able to sense the weight of her previous concerns returning to her shoulders.

Seven's lips twitched with a strained wryness. "Precisely." She admitted honestly, "However, I am unaccustomed to being the "centre of attention" as Neelix phrased it. I do not think I'd relish it."

"Oh, I don't know, it can be enjoyable in the right situation." Chakotay countered, and Seven wondered if she was imagining a twinkle in his eyes. "Besides, with the party also being in Tom's honour as well as ours, I'm sure he'll happily take on any attention you don't want."

Seven felt a laugh bubble pleasantly out of her throat which only grew louder as Chakotay joined her. "Yes, you are almost certainly correct about that!"

Chakotay laughed again, and then became more serious. "So you'll go then?" He unconsciously touched the back of her hand, which was resting on the console, encouragingly as she nodded shyly. "Good, I'm glad." He murmured before making a small sigh as he met her gaze, "I'm also relieved you're not angry with me about missing your conference, that was absolutely my fault after all."

Seven shifted awkwardly, embarrassment tingeing her features. "I was angry…at first." She conceded, glancing up at him guiltily, "But I now feel I should thank you for it."

Chakotay was slightly taken aback. "What? Why?"

A small, thoughtful smile settled on Seven's face. "As I told Mr Neelix, I believe I learned a great deal. Warp mechanics after all can be studied anywhere at any time, the Ventu on the other hand were unique."

"They certainly were." Chakotay agreed softly, "For what it's worth, I think I learned a lot too."

Seven couldn't resist lifting her eyebrows at him, "You learned to follow your scheduled flight plan at all times?" she suggested, her tone utterly deadpan but belied by the teasing smile pulling at her lips.

Chakotay burst out laughing. "No, not exactly, although I probably should take that lesson to heart shouldn't I?"

"Yes." Seven answered, brutally honest as ever. Her smirk soon fell away though, and she gazed at him gratefully, "You were fundamentally right however, Ledosia did show me some very relevant beauty."

"I'm glad to hear that Seven." Chakotay said, very sincere now. "You will come to the party won't you?"

Seven thought she could hear entreaty in his voice and felt heat rise up her cheeks. The Doctor and the Captain frequently firmly "requested" her presence at social events, but it felt very different with Chakotay asking. She knew that if the Doctor were here he'd remind her exactly why it was different, but she pushed those emotional considerations hurriedly aside. "Yes, I shall Commander."

"Good." Chakotay answered, his weighty tone conveying a lot more than that simple word. "Don't call me Commander anymore Seven. I'm Chakotay, at least when we're off duty, and remember this party is strictly casual."

Seven's expression became unreadable for a moment, her voice wavering. "As you wish, if you comfortable with that."

"I am." Chakotay assured her firmly, wondering why he'd never asked her before, all of the other senior officers had always called him Chakotay when they were off duty, with Tuvok sometimes the exception depending on his mood, but he'd never thought of extending the privilege to Seven. "I should have made that clear to you before, I'm sorry."

Seven flushed, "No need Comma…" She caught him frowning at her teasingly and corrected herself, "No need Chakotay."

Chakotay smiled at her widely, "I'll see you later then." He said cheerily, turning to leave.

Seven felt a sigh escape her as she nodded and then the doors shut behind him, feeling shell-shocked by this turn of events. "Yes, I suppose you will." She murmured to herself almost disbelievingly.

**A/n: The holodeck strikes again… ;) PLEASE REVIEW! :D Unfortunately I'll probably not be able to update again until next week, I've got a lot of work to do and my mum is coming to visit me too. I **_**might **_**be able to squeeze a chapter of something in tomorrow, but I can't guarantee that so I thought I'd warn you. **


	20. Chapter 20

The sheer variety of clothing options in the replicator database was even more immense than Seven of Nine had anticipated. If she hadn't known how much emphasis the Federation in general, but especially humanity, put on the importance of choice, she would've called this vast catalogue a woefully inefficient use of vital computer storage space. After all, what was the probability of any woman ever choosing to replicate a skirt decorated with brown horizontal stripes that were then overlaid with yellow and orange polka dots? Certainly not she, but as she glanced over at the sometimes equally lurid choices for men and smiled to herself, thinking of Neelix's fondness for clashing colours, perhaps there was someone for every outfit on this list. Despite that conclusion, she was still finding it irrationally difficult to select an outfit for the party she'd somehow been convinced to attend and which started in precisely 19 minutes.

The nagging presence of the time constraints at the back of her mind were starting to make her feel increasingly flustered and she glanced with some degree of longing at the small pile of freshly laundered biosuits sitting on a storage crate by her alcove, pondering whether to give in to habit and just wear one of those as she did every other day. Her innate stubbornness however, strangely decided to rear its head now; sharply reminding her that one of the conditions of her invitation was not to wear a uniform. Her biosuits weren't Starfleet issue of course, but she knew it could be argued that they counted as her own unique kind of uniform. She sighed in exasperation as she again began to scan through the list, limiting it to dresses now, since according to the Doctor's social lessons dresses were most appropriate for evening events like this one. It also meant she didn't need to use as many rations, but that wasn't really the point, she spent her allocated replicator rations so sparingly that Tom had once joked she could get every crewmember a drink and still have enough left over to last her the rest of the trip back to the Alpha Quadrant.

Unfortunately, the database immediately brought up the two dresses she'd shown interest in before. One was the dusky pink creation the Doctor had chosen for her experimental date with Lieutenant Chapman, a date that had gone so disastrously wrong that she would have wiped it from her memory if she could have. Voluntarily wearing a reminder of that evening was absolutely out of the question. The other dress however, was even more violently rejected. It was the bright red dress, short and figure hugging, she'd had the temerity to choose during her holodeck simulations, if only as a hologram disguising her biosuit. Just seeing it brought back a tumult of emotions she'd rather not think about, especially now, and she felt her stress headache intensify. Why was she putting herself through this again? It stuck her as painfully ironic that her main motivation for attending was because the real Chakotay had gone out of his way to ensure it. She paused for a few minutes, frozen with indecision, before she determinedly resolved that she should dismiss the past as irrelevant for tonight. Still, she made sure to remove all red dresses from her search parameters.

Even cutting out an entire colour from the selection, sadly red had always been her favourite colour it was one of the few traits that she had carried over from childhood, didn't make anything much easier in her current frazzled mindset. Suddenly though, like an unexpected gift, a memory from the day she'd supervised Naomi Wildman and Mezotti playing "fashion show" resurfaced from nowhere. Naomi, quoting one of the fashion manuals she'd dug out to get pictures from, had said with authority that a dress should be a shade or two darker than your eye colour to make your eyes "pop". If that held true, then blue would be a good colour for her. Feeling grateful to the pair of playful little girls, she narrowed her list down further and breathed a sigh of relief when she liked a particular blue dress immediately. That didn't mean she'd follow their make up advice though, after using herself and Ensign Wildman as clothes horses for a few hours, Naomi and Mezotti had practised their make up applying skills on her. Upon seeing the result, Samantha had admiringly called her a "trooper" for her patience and promptly taken her aside to show her how to take it all off, a process that had eventually involved a heavy duty facial wash, half a bottle of eye make up remover and a full bag of cotton wool balls.

Realising that she only had nine minutes left, she ordered her new dress from the replicator, making sure none of the fabrics would irritate her implants. Thankfully it was quite easy to put on, significantly simpler than her biosuits in fact, and after replicating matching shoes she felt relatively ready. Standing in front of a mirror that sat in storage at the back of the Cargo Bay, she was surprised by how much the dress changed her reflection. It was a rich, vibrant, indigo blue. The pencil style skirt hugging her legs right down to the knee, where it ended in two small slits, might have made her uncomfortable if the tights she was wearing to hide the implants scarring her legs didn't blend in with the outfit so well. It was the upper section of dress she liked best though, the silk that made the skirt ended as a sweetheart curve to her bust line, after that delicate lace covered her décolletage and shoulders, ending as fluted three quarter length sleeves at her elbow, all again hiding most of her implants. Holding her arms out, she impulsively spun herself slowly in front of the mirror, glad to feel a wide smile pulling at her lips. Remembering Chakotay's gentle comment about her hair, suddenly she saw his point about her up-do looking oddly severe; she hurriedly pulled out the restrictive pins, letting her hair fall freely over her shoulders. Uncertainty plagued her though, memories of her time on the holodeck, and Unimatrix Zero, tugging at her until she recalled more of Chakotay's words and replicated a ribbon which matched the one encircling the dress at her waist, using it to tie her hair back in the loose ponytail at the base of her neck. Satisfied, and surprised by how good the alterations made her feel, she couldn't help but wonder if having a fashion sense was so irrelevant after all.

* * *

"Do you want a drink Chakotay?" Tom asked good-naturedly as he walked over to his First Officer and friend, who was standing slightly separate from the main group of crewmembers, most of whom were crowded around the bar at that moment watching the holographic barkeep performing cocktail tricks that would've been impossible for any humanoid barman.

"No thanks, not now Tom." Chakotay declined quickly, glancing at the holodeck's doors, as he had been unconsciously doing every few seconds since he'd entered the programme. "I don't think I'll be drinking much tonight." Part of him badly wanted the cheery numbing effect of alcohol to take the edge of the nerves running through him like an electric current, but he doubted he could talk to Seven seriously if he were even a little tipsy.

"And why not?" Tom challenged laughingly, "You're off-duty and I'd say the situation on Ledosia needs to be drunk away and forgotten about."

Chakotay felt his eyebrows rise. "Is that code for everyone getting so drunk that they forget you needed flying lessons down there?"

"If I'd be so lucky." Tom said ruefully, although with a self-deprecating smile on his lips, "But B'Elanna at least will never let me forget it, even though I did help you and Seven out in the end."

"Well, that showed pilot manoeuvres that can't be taught, that's for sure." Chakotay conceded, "Thanks Tom."

"Anytime." Tom replied sincerely, his eyes narrowing as he caught Chakotay looking towards the doors for at least the third time during their short conversation. "What's up? Either this party is a lot worse than I think it is and you're looking for an escape route or you're waiting for someone. "

Chakotay's head snapped away from the door, caught out, wincing when he saw Tom's searching expression. "Seven hasn't come yet and she told me that she would, that's all."

Tom frowned at Chakotay's uncharacteristically cagey tone. "Well, it _is_ partly her party so she should turn up at some point, much as she dislikes social events I don't think she's ever consciously snubbed us. What time did you give her?"

"Neelix told us both 2000 hours." Chakotay answered pensively.

"Well…" Tom checked the clock on the wall, "It's only two minutes past."

"Have you ever known Seven to be less than punctual?" Chakotay countered, his mood visibly darkening.

Tom chuckled uneasily, caught off guard by Chakotay's serious air. "No, never." He admitted, "But there's always a first time. Why do you want her to come so badly?"

Chakotay shot him an exasperated look. "Is there something odd about wanting to socialise with my friend?" he asked curtly.

Tom backed off. "No, definitely not. I for one would love to see what she makes of this." He replied easily, though his curiosity was piqued, he'd never heard Chakotay refer to Seven in that way before, he'd always been cordial with her as far as he could tell, but right now he seemed concerned for her, though in an entirely different way than the Captain and the Doctor expressed it. Suddenly he didn't want to forget Ledosia so completely, and wished he'd been a fly on the wall while Seven and Chakotay had been trapped down there. He was getting the distinct impression it had been an interesting couple of days for them, to say the least.

He heard Chakotay's sharp intake of breath and grinned knowingly when he saw the cause. "There she is now."

**A/n: Another set up chapter, don't be angry with me! I just felt I couldn't squeeze all I wanted to happen at the party into one chapter. PLEASE REVIEW! :D A little shameless plugging now, I've just started a new fanfic fandom for the TV show "Dark Skies" and posted the first fic for it. I know the vast majority of you won't have seen it, but I purposefully wrote it so that non-fans could follow it because I want to grow the fandom. I'd really appreciate it if some of you lovely reviewers could tell me what you think of how I've written it, thanks! :)**


	21. Chapter 21

"Harry…" Tom prompted, fighting the laugh that was rapidly rising in his chest as he elbowed his friend sharply in the ribs, "Hurry up and close your mouth before a holographic fly flies into it. Besides, knowing Seven, she bound to ask why you're staring at her so…open-mouthed." He chuckled to himself as Harry hastily pressed his lips together, flushing bright red in embarrassment as he glared at Tom defensively.

"She wouldn't just ask…" He started in an irritated tone before groaning as he watched Seven walk closer, her steps so lacking their normal brisk confidence that she was apparently totally oblivious to the stunning effect she was having on all the men, which was as effective as a wide-spread phaser blast. "Alright, she _would_ probably ask but I've managed to deflect her questions before…" Tom's guffaws grew louder at that, drawing many curious glances to their conversation, and Harry decided to change tact. "Anyway, can you really blame me?"

"Not this time." Tom admitted honestly, though still smirking. "Looks like Chakotay certainly wouldn't."

"Chakotay?" Harry repeated blankly before giving his attention to his First Officer, who'd been talking to Tom just before he'd joined them and Seven had entered. Far from aping the open-mouthed awe he himself had shown at Seven's appearance, Chakotay, at first glance, looked more composed. He saw now though that that impression was deceiving, whereas most of the male crewmembers had lost interest by now, Chakotay's eyes were still unwaveringly locked on Seven, to the point of being distinctly blind and deaf to those around him. After all, he and Tom stood only a couple of paces from him and there had been no reaction whatsoever from him about their conversation. "What's up with him?"

Tom's eyebrows shot up at his friend's naivety, "Come on Harry, surely you can guess? You've been through it with her yourself after all haven't you?"

Harry's eyes shot disbelievingly from Tom to Chakotay and back again. "No, he can't be! He tried to suck her out an airlock, remember?"

"That was years ago and he just spent two days alone with her on a planet, do the math." Tom explained in exasperation, smiling as realisation dawned on Harry's face. "I wouldn't bring up the near miss with the airlock at the moment if I were you; Chakotay seems a little touchy right now."

"Yeah…" Harry agreed slowly, feeling ashamed of the curiosity which now kept his gaze firmly on Chakotay. To be fair to Tom's theory, he didn't think the older man had breathed since Seven had appeared, a simple elbow in the ribs wouldn't knock him out of it. "What should we do?"

Tom flashed him a mischievous grin, "The only thing we can do." He answered, stepping out from the crowd to hail Seven, "Hey Seven, over here!"

Seven restrained the relief that flooded her at the sound of Tom's cheery summons and the sight of his friendly smile among the sea of faces that were on the move constantly through the extent of the holodeck programme, not giving her a chance to gain badly needed bearings as to what was expected of her. "Good evening Lieutenant." She greeted him politely as she moved hastily towards him, freezing in place as she belatedly realised that Chakotay stood next to him with Harry Kim.

Seeing her tense up at the sight of Chakotay, an achievement considering how nervous this whole situation was obviously making the normally coolly indifferent former Borg, Tom kindly took her arm. "It's great to see you Seven, but drop the ranks tonight okay? It's Tom."

Seven nodded obligingly, "Of course, I presume that is a requirement of being "casual"?"

"It is." Tom agreed, smiling at her phrasing before looking her up and down, "Although I would say you look a lot more than casual tonight."

Seven's head dipped uncomfortably at his offhand compliment. "Perhaps I dressed a little too formally. It was difficult to decide, that is why I was delayed, I apologise."

"You look great Seven, don't worry!" Harry assured her eagerly, earning a shaky smile of gratitude from Seven.

"Oh yeah, you do. Don't you think so Chakotay?" Tom remarked, grinning to himself when his question forced Chakotay out of his stupor, looking dazed. "You were just starting to worry she wasn't going to come weren't you?"

Chakotay began to recover his wits, but not before shooting Tom a pointed and questioning look. "It wasn't like that exactly…" He began, his lungs suddenly fighting for air, "I just…"

"No, I'm sorry Commander." Seven cut him off, "I assured you of my presence here, it was very rude of me to be late…"

"It was only by a few minutes." Chakotay reminded her firmly, causing Tom no end of amusement since Chakotay had been left so agitated by her tardiness just moments before. "Anyway, it was worth it. You look…absolutely stunning, perfect."

Seven felt her cheeks tinge with pink as she heard true sincerity in his words and started to avert her gaze shyly, only to find her eyes sweeping over him appreciatively. He was dressed much more simply than her, just black trousers and a white shirt, but she found herself doubting how anyone could look better, the clothing just tight fitted enough to show off his muscular frame to its best advantage. The bright white of the shirt seemed to emphasise the healthy tan of his skin and the dark intensity of his eyes… She heard him take a deep breath and felt worry shoot through her that he'd caught her assessing him, a reply leaving her lips hurriedly before she could over think the wisdom of saying it. "You also look very handsome." Flushing as she realised the forwardness of the comment, she couldn't look at him, instead focusing intently on the details on her new shoes.

Chakotay's hand touched her shoulder reassuringly, and the heat of his skin seemed to pass through the sleeve of her dress until her head shot back up to meet his gaze. "It makes a change from red I guess." He commented light-heartedly, shrugging off the praise which actually made his heart race.

Seven nodded in agreement, gesturing awkwardly down at herself. "I do not normally embrace change, but this one has proven positive so far."

Chakotay's grin widened, "Definitely." He told her confidently.

Tom tapping him on the shoulder interrupted their conversation abruptly. Both had forgotten that Tom and Harry, let alone the rest of the crew, were present. "I'm getting requests to retell the Ledosian story…" Tom said, pointing to the group of laughing engineers bunched just behind them, "You two want to come and put in your side of the story?"

Feeling Seven back closer towards him in denial, Chakotay answered for both of them. "I think you'll do it enough justice for now Tom, we'll let you be the centre of attention for the moment." He said with a small wink at Seven, who didn't even think to stifle her giggle even as the sound made Tom's eyebrows arch questioningly.

"Now what's that supposed to mean?" he teased them, "Do you know me well enough to recognise a humble pilot when you see one?"

"I believe, for that to be the case, the definition of "humble" would need to be significantly altered." Seven replied, somehow managing to keep her voice completely deadpan even as Chakotay and Harry snickered beside her and her usually impassive blue eyed gaze sparkled with humour.

Tom dramatically threw a hand up to his chest as if she'd struck him, "I'm wounded Seven!" he laughed, "How can you say such a thing?"

She tilted her head at him, "Quite easily." She responded honestly.

Chakotay had to rein in his laughter to be able to talk at all. "Come on Tom, I'm sure you'll feel a lot less wounded once you're regaling the rest of crew with your story."

"Probably." Tom admitted as he turned to head towards his awaiting listeners, "But that doesn't mean the two of you will get out of telling us all about your experience of being stranded, in detail."

Seven cringed at the thought, glad that Tom was no longer watching. Dramatising her time with the Ventu for the benefit of the crew's entertainment was the last thing she wanted. The experience had been profoundly affecting and private and she couldn't share that with them. "Don't worry Seven." Chakotay's soft voice gently interrupted her thoughts, as if he'd been reading her mind. "You never need to talk about it if you don't want to, the crew wouldn't force it." He looked into her face reassuringly before cracking a small smile, "Tom was just teasing, and no doubt his stories will last the whole night anyway."

Seven nodded heavily, overwhelmed for an instant by the soothing effect his kind insight had on her, before she murmured gratefully, "Thank you Comm…Chakotay."

His smile was tinged with relief as she remembered to use his name; his rank had begun to grate on him when it came from her lips. "Hey…" He looked around the room, searching for a topic of conversation which wasn't coming to him naturally, "Do you want a drink or something?"

"That would be acceptable." Seven answered quickly, glad that he was taking the lead and scanning the confusing programme for a replicator.

Chakotay watched her keen gaze and guessed what she was looking for. "There are no replicators here; Sandrine's is supposed to be an early 20th Century establishment. We'll have to go to the bar." Seeing that she was still a bit disorientated, he gingerly took her by the wrist and guided her towards the bar against the far wall. "You haven't visited this programme before?" he asked in surprise. All kinds of events had been thrown at Sandrine's over the years; it was practically an extension of the Mess Hall when activated, so it disturbed him to think that Seven had never been invited before.

"Occasionally." She answered after a moment of thought, "But I've never stayed long, I didn't see the purpose of it."

Chakotay was glad that she spoke in the past tense, even appearing a little apologetic as she looked at him, and he relaxed a bit. He tried again to recall if he'd ever seen her here, but to be honest her present image, in that blue dress that was amazingly just as heart-stopping as the red one he still had engrained in his mind's eye, was the only thing he could think of clearly right now. "I hope this party is giving you a better impression, you've certainly made my night tonight…" He halted when he realised how that sounded and hastily added, "…with all those funny comebacks you gave Tom."

Seven gave him a small smile in reply, studying the scene around her cautiously. As they walked up to the bar together however, a small group of young men, all minor officers in security, began to whistle loudly. Seven turned to Chakotay with a perplexed frown as he noticeably stiffened, "Why are they making that sound?"

"No reason." He answered tersely, "They're just drunk and stupid." He moved as discreetly as he could to Seven's other side, trying to block the men's view of her as his blood began to boil. Weren't these guys mature enough to have grown out of wolf whistling? He wasn't so discreet with the warning glare he sent them, intense enough to penetrate even their cloud of intoxication.

Seven knew something had irritated Chakotay, but decided to let her questions go as the whistling abruptly ceased, making the issue irrelevant. The Doctor however, obviously wasn't ready to let it go as he popped up from behind the bar, dressed in full bartending gear, including a beret. "Stop that lewd whistling right now or I'll be ordering you to report to Sickbay for alcohol extraction, understood?" he declared irately.

"Yes sir." All the men mumbled, suitably chastised and all giving Chakotay wary glances before shuffling off unsteadily.

The Doctor sighed heavily, "The work of a bartender is never done…" He mused.

Chakotay propped his elbows on the bar as he eyed the Doctor questioningly, "Why exactly are you playing bartender again Doctor? I thought that was a one off for Kes' birthday years ago."

The Doctor grimaced, "Tom challenged me that if I could hold out for the whole night he'd do an extra week of shifts in Sickbay."

"And if you don't manage to "hold out"?" Seven asked.

"Then he gets a week off of course." The Doctor said with a sigh, "He's always looking for ways to shirk his duties in Sickbay; I would've thought anyone jumped at the chance to work with a medical expert such as myself…"

"He would not be able to shirk any duties or have to work extra if you ceased making these bets." Seven reminded him pointedly.

The Doctor had the grace to blush in shame, guiltily remembering when Seven had suffered because of a particular bet. "You're right." He admitted quietly before his attention to her current situation, his eyes flicking frantically from her to Chakotay and back again. "I see you've made use of the implant friendly fabric I designed to replicate some new clothes?" he commented knowingly, twitching an eyebrow at her out of Chakotay's line of sight.

"Yes." Seven confirmed tightly, shifting uncomfortably under his scrutiny, "I did not believe my biosuits would have been appropriate for this setting."

"No, they wouldn't be really." The Doctor agreed, "But I would've perhaps chosen…"

"Doctor…" Chakotay intervened firmly as he saw Seven flinch, "Aren't you going to say that the dress is beautiful on her?"

The Doctor bristled a bit at the reprimand but knew it was deserved as he looked at Seven. "Commander Chakotay is right of course." He said quickly, smiling at her sincerely, "I don't think I've seen you look better Seven."

"Thank you Doctor." Seven replied with graciousness that Chakotay admired, considering how the Doctor had initially spoken to her.

"Bartender!" A heavily accented voice called out and the Doctor spun around with an expression of dread to meet a hologram that was as much the boss of this establishment as he was in Sickbay. "I have ten customers waiting in line and you are here talking!"

"I was going to serve them…" The Doctor began defensively, only to be shushed by her plump hand pressing his lips shut. "Alright…I'll go." He acquiesced, his voice still muffled by her hand as he caught Tom pausing in his elaborate storytelling to watch the interaction.

Chakotay chuckled in amusement as the Doctor slouched off before turning back to Seven. "Seven, have you met Sandrine?"

"We have not been introduced." Seven said quietly, eyeing the fiery hologram, petite and buxom, cautiously. "You are the proprietor?" she asked Sandrine bluntly, not used to talking to holograms other than the Doctor in a scenario that was not a prescribed social lesson.

"Oui mademoiselle." Sandrine answered sweetly, "What would you like to drink tonight?"

Seven glanced at Chakotay uncertainly, who took that as a cue to suggest something. "I'll have a fresh orange…" Seven nodded and he corrected himself, "Two fresh orange juices please."

"Of course." Sandrine agreed, rolling her "r" excessively as she batted her eyelashes at Chakotay, "Whatever you desire."

Chakotay saw Seven watching this exchange intently and tried his best not to smirk. "Thanks Sandrine…" He told her politely before being interrupted by Chell's tap on his shoulder. "What can I do for you Chell?" he queried, suppressing the exasperated edge to his voice. Chell was well-known to be the ship's motor mouth and as much as he liked the friendly Bolian, he didn't want to spend the whole night talking to him.

"We're going to extend the programme to include a dance floor, would you mind coming to help coordinate?" Chell asked in a chirpy tone, "I'm afraid there's going to be arguments over which music to put on and…"

Chakotay flung his hands up to stop the, obviously long-winded, explanation. "Okay, I'll come over for a couple of minutes and organise things if you really need me too…"

"We need you to!" Chell declared desperately.

"Right, okay." Chakotay agreed, only sighing and letting himself roll his eyes a little at Seven as Chell turned away. "Seems I can't escape the First Officer's negotiator and counsellor role even when ranks aren't allowed."

"The crew respect your judgement." Seven assured him softly.

He smiled at the genuine comment. "Thanks." He murmured before his gaze became anxious, "You'll wait here?"

She shot him a wry look. "Where else am I going to go? I am unfamiliar with the protocols of such an event."

"You're doing fine." He told her firmly, "I'll be back in a couple of minutes, okay?"

Seven nodded and reached back for one of the barstools, awkwardly trying to perch on it before promptly starting to slip off, only prevented from falling to the floor by Chakotay's strong arms taking her by the waist and placing her securely on the stool. Heat flooded her and she found herself stuttering slightly, "Thank you…these chairs seem to be of an inefficient design…"

Chakotay was leaning over her to such and extent that she could see his Adam's apple moving up and down rapidly before replying, "its okay, a lot of people have trouble with them…" He stepped back, but it was as if his hands had a delayed reaction to his brain's order, lingering on her for an extra second or so before hurriedly letting go. "I'll see you soon, after I've dealt with whatever's going on…" He muttered distractedly, his voice an octave lower than normal, distinctly huskier.

"Yes." Seven murmured, watching his retreating back as he turned away from her and moved quickly into the crowd. Her mouth felt so dry that when Sandrine brought her the glass of fresh orange she gulped at it thirstily before even saying thanks.

Sandrine smiled knowingly as she followed her guest's gaze. "Monsieur Chakotay is certainly enchanted with you isn't he?"

Seven stiffened, spinning around on the barstool to stare at her holographic host. "Impossible." She retorted starkly, her voice wavering as confusion filled Sandrine's face. "You are incorrect; he would never see me in the way you are implying."

Sandrine sighed slightly at the young woman's clipped, hopeless tone and patted her hand kindly as she met her gaze. "I think it's you who needs to see _him_ more clearly, ma belle cherie."

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D Don't worry, the party isn't over yet! :)**


	22. Chapter 22

"Really Tom?" B'Elanna questioned sceptically as she mulled over her husband's assertions about the party's other two guests of honour, glancing first at Seven of Nine sitting alone by the bar then at back of Chakotay's head as he patiently stood mediating the crowd's debate over music choice. "Come on Tom, you _have_ to be imagining things." She shook her head disbelievingly, her eyes narrowing as they met his certain gaze, "One away mission stranded together does not a romance make." She pointed out firmly.

Tom, much to her irritation, chuckled, her eyebrows aching. "Is that so Lieutenant? I would've thought you'd remember that time you were stranded in open space with a certain pilot…"

B'Elanna rapped him lightly on the arm as a laugh she couldn't quite restrain confirmed his argument. "Alright, maybe it does happen _occasionally_, but you have to admit that we'd had something between us for a while before that…"

"There was?" Tom cut in innocently, blinking his eyes in bemusement for effect, "That wasn't exactly the impression I got…" When B'Elanna snorted in mock offence, he gently pulled his wife into his side, his hand automatically coming to rest protectively on her round belly, and kissed her intensely. Still though, as he pulled back breathlessly, he wasn't quite ready to let go of his newest pet theory. "Seriously though B'Elanna, watch them for a little while and see if you can really still say that one of those occasions isn't happening in front of our eyes."

B'Elanna looked up into his blue eyes that she loved so much and sighed as she saw earnest conviction there. He really wasn't joking. Realising that made her honestly think on Chakotay's behaviour these past few weeks, preoccupied didn't even cover it. Unbidden, the memory of how interested he'd become when she'd brought up Seven apologising to her flashed through her mind. She's found his questioning slightly odd at the time but hadn't thought much more of it, until Tom had to go and plant this idea in her head… "Alright." She declared suddenly, smirking when she saw Tom's surprise, "I'll go and see it for myself right now." Determined now, she immediately freed herself from his hold and headed straight for the bar.

"B'Elanna, I didn't mean you should…" Tom began uncertainly.

She flashed a quick grin at him, now feeling mischievous herself. "Be careful what you wish for Mr Paris."

* * *

Seven gave a start as she became aware of B'Elanna speaking to her, hastily pulling her gaze and attention back to her immediate surroundings rather to the back of the room where both had unconsciously drifted. "I apologise Lieutenant Torres." She said stiffly, again forgetting that in this setting using ranks was apparently considered inappropriate, "Were you attempting to speak to me?"

B'Elanna quickly shrugged off the apology, feeling a little guilty. "Don't worry about it, it's pretty loud in here. I was just asking you what you thought of the party."

Seven gripped the edge of the bar for a moment, unsure if the flurry of disconcerting emotions she'd felt thus far tonight could truthfully be described as enjoyable. "It has proved an interesting, even unique, experience." She finally answered, "Mr Paris has organised this party well."

B'Elanna nodded in agreement as her gaze swept over the numerous happy faces around them. "He certainly has, although Neelix certainly helped with the execution." Growing tired standing on her rapidly swelling feet, she reached to grab a barstool, "Not so bad for a humble pilot really." She added jokingly.

Seven's brows furrowed in amusement as she understood that B'Elanna was not offended, "He told you about that?"

"Yeah, you've never said anything more true either." B'Elanna replied good-naturedly as she scrambled onto the barstool, a taxing endeavour with the impediment of her pregnancy.

Seven offered her a hand, "Allow me to assist you." She suggested awkwardly, "These chairs are of a strange, ineffective design. I almost fell off myself."

"Thanks." B'Elanna said warmly as she took the unexpected help gladly, Seven didn't reveal a considerate side very often and made her questions multiply. "I did see Chakotay helping you earlier, that was a close call."

There was no mistaking it, Seven blushed brightly for a split second as she mentioned Chakotay and even after it had faded B'Elanna still noticed that the ex-drone's pale skin was a shade pinker than usual as she replied, "Yes, the Commander was there at the right time." She murmured softly.

B'Elanna heard the note of wistfulness in the other woman's voice even as her face became even more pensive. She doubted Seven was even consciously aware of how every few seconds her eyes would return to Chakotay, who still standing at the back of the room by the new dance floor. "He always is." She remarked, "You'll find he's very good that way Seven." She said kindly as she saw the normally indomitable ex-Borg shrink into herself, her eyes turned inward. God, Tom was right about one side of it at least, somewhere along this long journey Seven of Nine had become human in the most fundamental way.

That thought had barely passed through her mind when Chakotay himself made his way towards them, his pace was so certain that everyone could see he was making a direct beeline for the bar, it was as if his short time away had been spend on a desert island rather than a few metres away such was the way he seemed to drink in the sight of Seven like a parched man does water. Seven though, seemed oblivious to his reaction to her and, after opening her mouth as if to speak to him, quickly shifted her focus to Icheb, approaching them with Chakotay, instead, her demeanour steadying again. "I did not know you were here Icheb."

Icheb looked at his guardian shamefacedly, "I did intend to continue my studies tonight, but Neelix informed me this party was for you and that you'd like me to be here."

"Neelix was correct." Seven assured him immediately with an openly affectionate smile, "As for your studies, they can be continued at another time, this opportunity is unique." She sighed to herself as she realised she was repeating her own conclusion about her time with the Ventu at the expense of the warp mechanics conference and found herself looking past Icheb to meet Chakotay's intent gaze, who'd obviously remembered too as he smiled at her encouragingly. The hot blush of self-consciousness, which seemed to be growing fiercer every time she looked at him, burned again and her jaw clenched as she asked stiltedly, "How did the situation with the music resolve itself?"

Chakotay laughed, though the exasperation he'd felt strangled by a few minutes before was still obvious. "A compromise was reached, finally. I was starting to worry I'd spend the whole night being the peacemaker! It was Icheb who came up the solution actually."

Seven's eyes shot to her protégé in a questioning glance, who promptly explained, "I merely suggested that everyone take turns in selecting songs for the dancing, that seemed the most efficient way of ending the argument."

Seven's brow creased slightly, "Certainly it was. I wonder why it did not occur to anyone before, it seems glaringly obvious." She pronounced.

Chakotay chuckled, "Sometimes what's obvious is impossible to see in the heat of the moment."

B'Elanna couldn't resist shooting a pointed look between Chakotay and Seven, which only the former picked up on, as she agreed, "Yes, that's definitely true."

"Sounds like you're having a philosophical discussion here or something." Tom commented with a laugh as he joined his wife, smiling at her as the music began in earnest. "You feel like leaving it for a little while to give your old man a dance?"

B'Elanna slipped off the stool and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, "Don't start that, if you're an old man what does that make me?" she teased as he led her away.

Icheb frowned after them uncertainly, "I was under the impression that Lieutenant Paris was still considered relatively young for a human."

"I believe "old man" can be a humorous term for husband." Seven explained with a quick glance at Chakotay for confirmation, who nodded.

Chakotay himself was beginning to feel antsy as he watched many crewmates pair off, either romantically or platonically, for dancing. He knew himself well enough to know why this was, it had been the only reason he'd let himself be distracted from her to deal with the music debate, but he wasn't sure if dancing with Seven would be a mistake. Could he really afford to muddy the waters even more between them when they still needed to talk? He mentally snorted at the thought, he'd made everything complicated of his own free will the instant he'd agreed to step into that holodeck and then reach out to her, let alone asking her here and finally acknowledging to himself that his attraction to her was rapidly becoming all consuming, pushing all other, more noble, concerns about her to one side. "Do you want to dance Seven?" he asked, much more abruptly than he'd intended, somehow managing to say it all in one shaky breath.

Seven's slim frame jumped as if his question had electrocuted her, again almost falling off the stool as she developed what could only be described as a deer in the headlights expression, one he never thought he'd see on her face. "I must decline." She answered jerkily, her voice deteriorating into a stammer, "I do not…I _cannot _dance…"

The embarrassment on her face was so obvious, this time her blush was lingering to the point where she was truly red faced, that Chakotay found that curiosity over extreme reaction hit him before disappointment. "I find that hard to believe Seven, everyone can dance for fun." He backed off as her discomfort increased, her flushed face ducking away from him. "It doesn't matter." He told her with a reassuring smile, "It's not an order Seven." He added as she continued to look unhappy, although the disappointment he felt wash over him left his earlier mental debate null and void.

While listening to Chakotay, Seven also had Icheb's confused whispers in her ear. "I do not see why you should not be able to dance Seven, you're more agile than most humans. Besides, it may be considered rude to dismiss the Commander's offer so completely…"

Seven cringed painfully. Her enhanced body was the problem, she couldn't risk injuring Chakotay as she had her last unfortunate dance partner! As Icheb said though, she knew that to refuse would be offensive… She took a few seconds to study the already dancing couples and saw that none of them were in the strict ballroom frame the Doctor had taught her and which had previously been her downfall. There seemed to be less scope for disaster. "You need not order me Chakotay." She said quietly, taking a deep breath as she took his offered hand then slipped off the stool, "I will try to dance with you, if you wish."

Chakotay could feel her slender fingers quivering slightly as she tentatively grasped his hand and automatically squeezed them as he smiled at her reassuringly, "I do wish it." He told her, suddenly feeling much calmer as he led Seven away from the bar and onto a quiet corner of the dance floor away from the prying eyes which obviously made her so uncomfortable. "I haven't done this properly since high school prom but I promise I won't stand on your feet." He assured her lightly.

"It is not your expertise I am worried about…" Seven muttered to herself distractedly, cringing once more as she realised what she'd just unintentionally revealed.

Chakotay frowned as he saw she wasn't joking and put a firm hand on her shoulder to get her to look at him. "Seven, you don't really think you're a bad dancer do you?" His eyes swept over her figure, which he'd learned over the past few weeks was inherently graceful despite her ingrained Borg stiffness. "I don't believe that."

Seven sighed then and cautiously raised her gaze back up to his. "The one and only time I practised dancing, except with the Doctor, I dislocated Lieutenant Chapman's shoulder." She admitted guiltily, shifting away from him as if she expected him to push her away in terror.

"When did you dance with Lieutenant Chapman?" Chakotay queried sharply, counteracting her withdrawal by stepping closer.

Seven released a heavier sigh, but ultimately decided that it would be better to explain, though his suddenly abrasive tone confused her. "He was the one Lieutenant Paris and the Doctor "set me up" with when they tested my social skills."

Chakotay bristled as he recalled what she was referring too. "You mean that time they bet on you?" he clarified harshly, flinching as she nodded. He'd been the one to deal with that punishment but now he regretted his leniency, people had been stuck in the Brig or demoted for less cruel acts, but personally if that had happened now they'd be getting a dose of Maquis justice, a fist to the face. "I should've given both of them much stiffer penalties than I did Seven, I'm sorry."

"They did not break any Starfleet regulations." Seven said simply, "And I do not think, from the level of guilt they exhibited afterwards, that they truly intended to hurt me." Her face darkened for a moment, "In fact, I think they were certain I wouldn't care."

Chakotay swallowed a lump that had risen in his throat, observing her with new eyes once more. "You're too forgiving sometimes Seven."

Seven shook her head, "No, quite the opposite." She bit the edge of her lip, "However, I ask forgiveness of everyone, I do not like to be hypocritical."

Chakotay decided to change the subject, they were treading on difficult ground for him considering he'd done much worse by her in the holodecks than Tom and the Doctor had ever done. "If it makes you feel any better, I remember now that Lieutenant Chapman came to me for altered duty shifts when his shoulder was dislocated, as far as I know he never told anyone how it happened."

Seven exhaled in relief before her lips twitched wryly, "Perhaps I have better taste in partners than I thought."

"Maybe…" Chakotay forced out. Considering that he knew perfectly well Seven barely interacted with Chapman, he was having a hard time smothering the flames of jealousy this conversation had somehow sparked within him. The more he tried to dampen it, the hotter it raged. "But not for dancing obviously, I'll show you."

Seven felt her heart rate increase exponentially as his hands, after guiding her own onto his shoulders, moved down her body, one between her shoulder blades and the other fitting snugly on the small of her back. She was unsettled by how easily her body seemed to accept and mould to his touch, that was only going to encourage futile emotion! Still though, when his feet began to moved she found herself following him with little effort. She was barely aware of the next few minutes, until she realised that at some point her own hands had moved of their own accord to curve around his neck rather than rest stiffly on his broad shoulders. She could only blush as to move now would make him notice her impropriety…

Suddenly the music changed from instrumental to vocal and Chakotay instinctively came to halt as he felt Seven freeze in his arms. "What is it?" he asked in concern.

"This song…" Seven mumbled, her face reddening further when she realised he wouldn't have noticed if she hadn't reacted.

Chakotay listened intently to the words, unable to place the song for a few seconds until something triggered his memory, "I think its "It Can't Be Wrong" by Frank Sinatra, a 20th Century singer…"

"I know the song." Seven interrupted, avoiding his eyes, "I…I sang it during my captivity in the World War II simulation."

Chakotay's eyes widened as he realised what she was talking about. Seven's short-lived stint as a bar singer was part of the folklore on board Voyager, since it was just so seemingly out of character for her, but he himself had never heard her, having been playing the role of fighting soldier at the time. "This…is _you_ singing?" he asked, awestruck that the beautiful, and downright seductive, voice he was hearing from the speakers had once come from the mortified young woman in his arms.

Seven nodded shyly, her lips pursing. "I'd heard rumours that there was a recording of it, but I thought I was being teased."

Chakotay startled her by removing his hand from her back, her body instantly crying out for the warmth, but he surprised her again by cupping her face with it. "You could never be teased about that Seven, you have an amazing voice and I want to dance to it if that's okay with you?"

He sounded so firm that Seven found her embarrassment leaving her as quickly as it had come and a smile coming in its place, even a small chuckle. "I remember singing "Moonlight Becomes You" too, so you may have to dance with me a second time."

Chakotay's arms naturally encircled her again. "Gladly."

**A/n: I think I got a bit carried away with this chapter, I hope it was still in character and believable. PLEASE REVIEW! :D I'm going away for the weekend so this might be my last chapter for a few days, but I've got an idea for another one-shot nagging at me so if I have time I'll type that up tomorrow. :)**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/n: This chapter is dedicated to NikkiB1973 as a thank you for posting her C/7 fic, "Rescuing Chakotay". She's managed to salvage the episode "Resolutions" with the help of Seven and a time machine! It's an awesome fic, so read it! :)**

The clink of glasses chorusing around Sandrine's hit Seven's ears abrasively and knocked her back into alignment with the world around her as she felt Chakotay draw to a reluctant halt and she automatically followed him as she had throughout their impromptu dance. She blinked, feeling oddly unfocused, and shivered involuntarily as Chakotay's warm hands fell away from their close, guiding hold around her. Her breath caught in her throat for an instant as she caught his gaze in that moment the spell the dance had apparently cast upon them broke. For a split second she was _certain_ she saw longing of some kind in his affectionate, thoughtful gaze, but she angrily dismissed the notion as wishful thinking as she realised that her arms were still loosely coiled around his neck for support and yanked them back to her sides with so much haste that she barely registered Chakotay's flinch at the withdrawal, nor the shudder which ran over him as her hands inadvertently slid down his chest. "What's happening?" she asked hurriedly, once again taking irrational interest in her shoes rather than looking directly at him.

Chakotay brushed her shoulder with the back of his hand as he pointed behind her, "Look who's here."

Seven turned to where he indicated and saw that Captain Janeway was now standing in the centre of the room surrounded by crewmembers, many of whom were rattling and clinking their glasses at her. She stiffened with embarrassment as she wondered how long the Captain had been present for without herself, or seemingly Chakotay, noticing. The background music had dulled back into nondescript instrumentals, they must've danced through both of 'her' songs and others, although even her internal clock couldn't tell her how long they'd been dancing for in reality. "I presume their making that noise to attract the Captain's attention?" she asked Chakotay quietly, lifting her metallic brow slightly.

Chakotay chuckled as he nodded, "Neelix doesn't tend to believe a party is complete without a speech of some kind, he'd make a great wedding compeer."

As if he'd heard Chakotay's cue, Neelix called out above the din of his babbling guests, "Would you like to make a speech Captain?"

The Captain laughed, and from her expression Seven knew she'd expected this at some point, although she half-heartedly tried to bat away the Talaxian suggestion. "I'm sure everyone just wants to enjoy the party without hearing from me for once Neelix…"

Neelix shook his speckled head firmly, "You represent us all Captain, and this is a party of thanksgiving."

Won over, Janeway smiled amiably in agreement, her keen eyes now seeking out and finding Chakotay and Seven. "Yes, we do have a lot to be grateful for these past few days." Gamely, she grabbed a chair and stepped onto it like a stage, elevating her petite frame above the heads of most of her crew. "I'd like to thank every single one of you for working non-stop to find Commander Chakotay and Seven Nine, and in trying to get them back. I'm sure they appreciate it."

Feeling Seven stiffen uncomfortably at all the expectant eyes on them, Chakotay stepped in smoothly. "Of course we do Captain and we're glad to be back."

"That's what this party is to celebrate, your return and the crew's hard work." The Captain replied warmly, her gaze sweeping over her crew with the all-encompassing speed of an electioneering politician."

"Here, here!" Tom echoed cheerily, before quickly adding, "Don't forget my Ledosian trained piloting skills though, I want those celebrated too."

"They will be!" The Captain answered to a wild chorus of cheers and laughter from her crew which she drank in, "Keep enjoying the party!" she concluded before hopping off the chair and heading for the party's signature guests, whom she was a little surprised hadn't come to speak to her before now. "How's your party going, a tonic for Ledosian ire?" she joked as she reached Chakotay.

"I think so." Chakotay replied, glancing at Seven, "Makes you glad to be back on Voyager, right?"

"Yes." Seven agreed softly, studying the happy, familiar faces around her with new appreciation. "I doubt such an event could happen with such exuberance outside Voyager."

"You'd be surprised, but we do have to enjoy the good moments when they come along." The Captain told her, only now taking the time to assess her protégé's outfit with surprise, "Has the Doctor been trying out a new wardrobe on you again Seven?"

Chakotay frowned a little at the assumption in her tone, but Seven's own expression revealed nothing other than slight embarrassment. "I chose this myself Captain."

"Oh!" The Captain exclaimed lightly, "Well, it's certainly different, but very nice for the occasion I suppose." As Seven nodded obligingly, she now realised that they were standing on the dance floor. "Have the two of you been dancing all this time?" she asked with mild incredulity, "At your own party? Everyone's here to speak to you…"

"The Commander was kind enough to assist me in correcting my dance technique Captain." Seven interrupted, "It was an activity I was uncertain of, and so I took his offer, but I assure you I have spoken to everyone who expressed a desire to speak to me."

The Captain was mollified by that, the thought that Seven had sidestepped the opportunity to socialise with the wider crew in favour of Chakotay who she was already comfortable with had exasperated her for a moment. She didn't want Seven to only be accepted by the senior officers and still distrusted by the junior ranks. "Good then." She turned to Chakotay with a wry, questioning look on her face, "I've never known you to dance in all of our seven years here Chakotay."

"Like I told Seven, I haven't danced properly since senior prom." Chakotay replied slightly to brush off her suspicious tone, "She didn't need me to correct anything, she's a perfect technician as always." He smiled at Seven encouragingly, "It was just a little confidence you needed, that's all."

Seven felt herself smile back as his gentle tone soothed something inside her, "Yes, the Borg did not instil me with their arrogance when it came to dancing."

"Knowing them, it was considered irrelevant." The Doctor remarked drily as he appeared at Seven's elbow. "Which doesn't mean you shouldn't do it of course…" He quickly added as he caught the Captain and Chakotay's sharp gazes. "Actually Seven, I was teaching myself the tango while you were gone, perhaps we could…"

Seven blanched a little but fought the instinctive urge to look at Chakotay, instead regarding the Doctor coolly, "I think I've had enough dancing for one evening Doctor." She informed him, feeling dizzy and hot as she recalled the surreal experience with Chakotay.

She felt Chakotay's hand move to hold her up even before she felt her legs go weak, his dark eyes burning with concern even as it was Janeway who spoke, "Are you alright Seven? You've turned pale."

Seven felt a shot of panic hit her in the chest as the Doctor swiftly withdrew a tricorder from within his bartender costume and scanned her. Surely her emotional failsafe wasn't triggering now, not after remaining dormant on Ledosia? Relief radiated through her even as the Doctor breathed a long, disapproving sigh. "Your electrolyte levels are far too low, you haven't regenerated since you got back have you?"

"No." Seven answered honestly, "I prioritised completing my report and attending this function, but I will leave now."

"We're not ordering you to leave the party Seven…" The Captain began apologetically before exchanging a worried glance with the Doctor, "…but it would probably be best."

"Yes Captain." Seven agreed with a diffidence which amazed Chakotay, although he could see that she did appear suddenly drained and felt anxiety stab at him.

Still, he had to bite back a sigh. He knew Seven had had plenty of time to regenerate between their return and the party, but he also suspected why she hadn't. Although he'd done his best to comfort her, the situation with the Ventu had roused guilt, unjustified or not, which would've made any sort of relaxation difficult. He knew his mind had been too unsettled by it all to release him into sleep. "I think I'll leave now too Captain, I've got some duty rosters to finish…" To Chakotay's chagrin, he was pretty sure he heard Tom give a knowing chuckle somewhere behind him and he had to wonder if his excuse to leave with Seven was that transparent.

Neither Seven nor the Captain or the Doctor seemed to notice however, the Captain even looked pleased. "Well, unfortunately these things need to be arranged every day." She commented to him with a wan smile and a shrug before looking at him seriously, "You'll make sure that Seven does regenerate won't you? Sometimes she gets distracted by efficiency and it's been a long day already…" She whispered to him.

Chakotay suppressed an incredulous gasp. He knew Seven could hear all this perfectly well, her stance and expression were too well-schooled into impassivity for it to be otherwise, and he couldn't help but be offended on her behalf. He knew that the Captain took a motherly view of Seven, and the Doctor to the lesser extent a fatherly one, but they were acting as if he were escorting a teenager back for her curfew, not a grown woman who'd been through a darker hell than they could imagine and had a high enough IQ to put many computer programmes to shame. He remembered the Captain's attitude to Seven's privacy in regard to the holodecks and winced, how was a woman who went to such measures to involve herself going to take the fact that he and Seven had been growing closer under her radar?

Seven's voice, muted and resigned compared to the compelling spark of life he'd witnessed in her only minutes before, broke through his troubled thoughts. "I am leaving Commander." It irritated him that she lapsed back into using his rank, "You may stay here…"

"No." He interrupted her firmly, resting his hand on her arm as he moved defensively to her side. He then smiled at her warmly, "I invited you, so we should leave together."

Seven felt a strange fluttering in her stomach as she heard the assured certainty in his voice, as if he were entirely comfortable with announcing to the whole crew that he had singled her out as his company, his friend. "As you wish." She acquiesced in a shy murmur.

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! I hope you're not disappointed with this chapter, a bit less fluff and a lot more interference… I was going to write more but I haven't had much time today because it's my 21****st**** birthday. I've finally got a new chapter up for "The Borg With Butterfly Wings" though, so please read that too. :)**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/n: I know many of my other fics deserve updating, but lots of people were desperate to know what would happen after the party and my imagination complied. Thanks for the support everyone! :)**

Seven's acute hearing focused in on the pitiless click of her new high heels on the corridor's smooth floor as the disconcerting silence between herself and Commander Chakotay lingered stubbornly on. From her observations of the crew, she'd discovered to her disadvantage that humanoids tended to dislike periods with little or no conversation and would go to sometimes embarrassing lengths to fill it with inconsequential chatter that she had little idea how respond to. At this moment though, paradoxically, she found herself mentally begging Chakotay to take up this habit that she normally found so irksome, if only to distract her from thoughts concerning him and their evening which would undoubtedly lead her into a labyrinth of confusing emotions she'd rather not unravel.

Perhaps he was merely accompanying her out of politeness, he had said that it was a social convention for guests to be taken home by the person who'd invited them out, but he'd also been prodded into it by Captain Janeway and had made it clear that he had work to complete. She didn't want to be the unwitting source of his delay. That thought was enough to stop her in her tracks, the patent heels giving one last click as her feet came together.

Chakotay was walking just a pace or so behind her, lost in his own thoughts as he watched her move. It fascinated him somehow that even her gait was a unique mix of strict Borg precision and easy, feminine grace. The two things should have been utterly incompatible, yet Seven combined them fluidly and unconsciously. Her bearing was as upright as a marching general, arms pinned behind her back as her feet beat measured, exact steps into the floor, yet there was little harshness to the movement. In his eyes she moved as smooth as a swan through water, her hips still managing to sway alluringly in front of him. When she came to an abrupt stop, he was so distracted he very nearly collided with her, just managing to judder to a halt within a few hair breadths of her back. "What's wrong?" he asked quickly to cover up his embarrassment, "Did you leave something in Sandrine's?"

Seven shook her head, biting her lip as she thought wryly; I left behind my sense of composure. "No." She answered, chancing throwing him a quizzical glance over her shoulder, "I did not bring any superfluous belongings with me to the holodeck."

Chakotay swallowed as he chuckled awkwardly, "Right, of course." He agreed, mentally cursing the question, Seven wasn't exactly the type to carry a purse around, let alone leave it lying somewhere. "Why'd you stop then?" he asked good-naturedly, "You still want to go back to the Cargo Bay right?"

"Yes, I must regenerate." Seven confirmed briskly before ducking her gaze down from his, looking ahead down the corridor towards the turbolift which would take her down to Cargo Bay 2. "I was merely going to assure you that you are under no obligation to accompany me, I know that you must be anxious to complete the crew duty rosters."

If Seven hadn't looked so genuinely concerned and innocent at the moment, Chakotay might've thought she was teasing him and laughed. Obviously his excuse to leave the party with her had backfired somewhat, he should've known Seven, utterly guileless as she was, would've taken his apparent dedication to the duty rosters at face value. "Duty rosters can wait; I finished this week's before I came out to the party actually." He informed her honestly, smiling weakly as he saw her bemused expression, "I enjoyed the party, but it's been a long couple of days for both of us." He smiled at her, "I need sleep more than you need regeneration!"

Guilt rather than the laugh he'd been hoping for after this light remark settled over Seven's face. "Then you should return to your quarters and not concern yourself with me, I know that the Captain said you should check that I do as she asked, but…"

"What the Captain said is irrelevant." Chakotay interrupted her firmly, "What you do doesn't need to be approved of by me or anyone else." He forced himself to back down as she appeared gratified but startled by his words. "Anyway, like I said earlier, its good manners to accompany you back and we didn't get enough chances to talk in a crowded place like Sandrine's." Seven met his gaze in surprise. They had talked a great deal at the party; he'd conversed with her more than with anyone else and vice versa. She was about to point this fact out to him when Chakotay spoke again, his tone still light and teasing even as she sensed his dark gaze becoming serious, "Unless you're bored of my company Crewman?"

Seven tore her face away from his, having realised by now that it was a futile exercise to suppress her blush reflex around him. "No, no, of course not…" Out of the corner of her eye she saw regret for her embarrassment flicker across his face, his fingers resting briefly on her arm, again making the skin under the lace sleeve warm. She found herself twitching an eyebrow at him as her discomfort suddenly retreated, "I can assure you that I have tolerated much more boredom than you inspire, _sir_."

Chakotay laughed outright at the spark in her eyes as she emphasised "sir" in the same joking way as he had called her "Crewman", though much more successfully deadpan than he had managed. "Alright then, it's agreed, neither one of us is bored, so let's keep walking shall we?" He grinned as she nodded, falling fully into step with her this time as they moved towards and entered the turbolift rather than hanging behind her. "Honestly Seven, I find it hard to believe that the Doctor hasn't taught you about proper manners with parties. I invited you to come with me; I wouldn't have let you leave alone and kept on partying myself."

Seven fought the urge to snap around to face him fully in the confined space of the turbolift, instead reining herself in to a sweeping glance at his face. His expression was honest and open, he was totally unaware of the effect his words had had on her. Yes, he'd convinced her to attend the party, but she hadn't dared suspect that he'd invited her _specifically_. They'd both attended at Neelix's request, that was _all_, the more rational side of her brain insisted, but the idea of his requesting her presence seemed to latch onto her emotions like a vice and then squeeze. "I…" She trailed off for a moment, forgetting what he had said, but then pulled herself together in response to his inquisitive gaze, though her heart still pumped a little too quickly as she spoke, "Well, I'm sure that the Doctor has informed me of that convention at some point, but as all of the individuals I interact with in my social lessons are holograms, they cannot exactly accompany me home." She allowed her lips a wry twist, "The Doctor probably would, but by the time my lessons come to an end we are generally mutually ready to be apart." She gave a small sigh as he nodded knowingly, "In such simulations we can frustrate each other a great deal."

"I can believe that." Chakotay agreed sympathetically as they stepped out of the turbolift. He tried not to shudder as they walked down the dark, Borg technology infested corridor to Cargo Bay 2's huge, imposing doors, remembering his earlier thoughts about Seven being penned down here. That belief had only intensified tonight as he'd become more acutely aware of the Captain and the Doctor's patronising treatment of her. "Seven…" He broached carefully as he followed her inside the cavernous space that was the Cargo Bay, "Does certain behaviour…" He cleared his throat, fearful of offending her or worse her not knowing what he meant, "…by particular crewmembers upset you?"

Seven, who'd left his side to calibrate her alcove, turned to gaze at him directly while still nonchalantly dialling commands into the alcove's control panel. "You are referring to the Doctor and Captain Janeway?" she questioned bluntly, lifting her metallic eyebrow once again as he blanched at her directness but didn't deny it. "I noticed that my interactions with them seemed to unsettle you." She clarified softly.

And they say this woman is ignorant of people's feelings, Chakotay thought silently, marvelling at her perceptiveness while also wondering, perhaps egotistically, if it was limited to him. "Yes." He admitted quietly before taking on a stronger tone, "It did more than "unsettle" me Seven, it irritated me. You've grown so much as a person and they seem to forget that more often than they should."

Seven's brow furrowed as she considered this. "You say they were…patronising this evening…" She began slowly, waiting for Chakotay to give a saddened, exasperated nod before continuing, "But you forget that they _are_ my patrons in many ways." She pointed out, "I have resisted them often, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse, but if I always disregard their advice on trivial or irrelevant matters, they may not give it when I _do _require it." She sighed heavily, leaning against her alcove as she felt his eyes on her and unable to stop her own eyes from giving a small roll, "One of the main things I have had to learn on Voyager is tolerance of others' opinions." Her tone became self-deprecating, "It is a skill I have yet to perfect."

"It's difficult for everyone sometimes." Chakotay replied quietly, his voice so muted and thoughtful that Seven found herself studying him. His gaze had become distant, his jaw had tightened, and she had to wonder whether her words had upset him. He wasn't offended, she knew that much, but she was surprised to realise that he understood. She did not inquire about the Maquis as a rule, she'd realised from her earliest days on Voyager that politics was even more out of line as an investigative subject than the crew's romantic lives, and as such knew little more than bare facts about how the Maquis crew had integrated with the Voyager crew in the years before she'd come abroad. Human nature alone dictated that the transition must've been difficult for the Maquis crewmembers, but she'd always believed that Chakotay had accepted his position early on. Unlike her, he'd never seemed to have to work to hide underlying conflict, he was always calm, unruffled, willing to compromise. It only struck her now that that exterior was hard for him to maintain, he'd had enough disagreements with the Captain over the years, not least with bringing her onboard, to show that he did exert anger and outrage when the situation was dire enough. Perhaps it had been as difficult for him, in his own way, to adapt to Voyager as it had been for her. As the last of these thoughts occurred to her, Chakotay seemed to shake his regrets off as if he'd heard her inner voice. "I had a great time tonight Seven, I'm glad you decided to come."

"As am I." Seven agreed shyly, "I enjoyed the new experiences." She flushed as she thought she saw a new intensity fill his eyes for a moment, and lowered her head, covering her confusion by indicating her dress. "This new attire seemed to be well received also."

Chakotay stepped closer, smiling warmly now. "Of course it was, you're beautiful." He said simply, swallowing hard as he saw her cheeks grow pinker. "You know…" He added huskily, saying the first words that came into his dazed mind, "If you wanted to, I'm sure you could be more flexible with what you wore for duty shifts, maybe even a uniform."

Seven's eyes shot piercingly up to his, wary and questioning. He could see the hope in her pale blue irises too though and felt guilty for using his knowledge of her holodeck simulations to gain insight, but then again, all he wanted at that moment was to see fully into her mind. "I could not, I was Borg, the crew would be uncomfortable and I do not deserve…"

"You deserve every bit of recognition you get now and much more Seven." Chakotay cut in firmly, "The crew wouldn't be offended, you're a part of this crew now and you're certainly _not_ Borg."

Seven felt her resolve to refuse waver as he looked upon her so emphatically, his belief in her evident and empowering but also frightening in a way she couldn't describe, her heart starting to race again. "Well, I suppose I could request a Crewman's uniform since I haven't been through Starfleet Academy but still it breaks regulations and the Captain…"

"The Captain will be happy that you've asked." Chakotay assured her gently, sighing a little as he saw she still looked unsure. It was another anomaly of Seven's life here that she was in limbo between being entirely unacknowledged by Starfleet yet somehow considered a senior officer as well. Despite her being modest and sticking to Crewman, he knew that in the reality of everyday life on Voyager Seven only really put herself under the command of the Captain, himself and Tuvok. Out of the Lieutenants on board, only B'Elanna, of course, thought to order her around at all. "Listen, if it would make you more comfortable I'll come with you when you ask the Captain for permission."

Seven exhaled more heavily than she'd intended. "I'd appreciate that Chakotay."

Chakotay gave her hand a brief, encouraging squeeze. "How about tomorrow then? We can talk to the Captain and then have dinner."

"Dinner?" Seven echoed uncertainly, then nodded dumbly as she realised that was impolite. "If you wish." She swallowed hard as she began to feel her head begin to hurt in earnest. The failsafe… Still, even as the thought of that threat occurred to her, she found herself saying, "I'd like that."

Chakotay didn't think as her shocked, nearly whispered, reply hit his ears, he bent his head and let his lips brush her cheek. He knew at once, as soon as he touched her feather soft skin and felt the spark of desire run through him, that he'd acted on one impulse too far. It would've been easier, in many ways, simpler, if he could just move to her lips and kiss her. All of the confusing feelings and what ifs would disappear then, he wouldn't need to tell her everything, actions spoke louder than words after all. He withdrew though after barely a second, feeling temptation again as she gazed up at him in disbelief, rosy faced. "I really enjoyed tonight Seven. It's another tradition to kiss your companion goodbye."

"Oh." Seven murmured, colouring deeper. She supposed that made sense, the Captain was always exchanging pecks on the cheek with her DaVinci hologram, she shouldn't read so much into it, and yet… Acting on autopilot, she tilted her head and hastily returned the gesture, feeling her palms grow damp as her lips lingered for a split second on his warm skin. She heard his breathing quicken and tensed as she pulled back, also breathless. "I enjoyed myself also…" She forced out, stumbling over the next thing that suddenly needed to be asked, "Chakotay, will this dinner be a…a date?"

She stiffened in preparation for his horror at her blatant misunderstanding, but instead relief and even pleasure diffused over his handsome face. "I'd like it to be Seven." He replied in a gentle, low voice, smiling slightly at her shocked expression before hurriedly turning to leave.

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/n: Wow, this story has reached 200 reviews in 24 chapters, that's a record for me! Thank you so much for all the feedback and support everyone, I truly appreciate it. Please keep it up and enjoy this chapter! :)**

Seven squinted in distaste as she stood in the half light of the Cargo Bay, positioned in front of the cracked mirror which had been discarded from someone's quarters and she'd been using with increasing frequency lately, not least the night before when she'd chosen her outfit for the party. Her Borg mindset had resisted the urge to replicate a new one; it was an irrational impulse of vanity. Still, she mentally remarked wryly, here she was acting on that same impulse with flawed materials, the Collective wouldn't have approved of that either. Slowly, she traced one finger over the rim of her optical implant, brushing her forehead as she did so at almost the exact place where her cortical node was locked deep in her skull. An unintentional sigh left her throat then as she gazed at her pale reflection on the mirror's dusty surface, the failsafe hadn't fully triggered last night but its warning pangs and the inevitable accompanying dreams had disturbed her regeneration enough to drain her complexion and keep a tired wrinkle lingering between her brows.

As the clock ticked ever closer to her duty shift in Astrometrics starting, the same question that had been on repeat in her mind echoed again, what should I do? The initial argument she'd made to the Doctor concerning her failsafe still held true, mostly. However, she'd defied the premise of that argument just by agreeing, tentatively or not, to join Commander Chakotay on a dinner date. It was likely, in all honesty even probable, that the failsafe would activate in such a situation but be that as it may she didn't want to back out, the spark of excitement, of hope, she felt at the prospect somehow dominated over the waves of fear she was experiencing simultaneously.

The languid swish of the Computer dragging the Cargo Bay's hulking pair of doors open made her jump violently, inhaling sharply as she whipped her head around to confront the intruder.

Chakotay's warm smile tensed sheepishly as he registered her reaction to his arrival. "Good morning Seven." He swallowed nervously as she stared at him wordlessly, "I'm sorry, did I disturb you?"

Seven hurriedly stepped unconsciously back from the mirror, managing this time to smother her blush before it diffused over her cheeks. "No, not at all. I was just…" She trailed off, realising a lie would trap her in a corner, and instead turned to face him, quirking an eyebrow mildly, "Don't you have a duty shift on the Bridge this morning?"

Chakotay met her gaze as her eyes swept appraisingly over his freshly pressed uniform. "I'm on my way there." He confirmed quickly, "I just thought I'd come here first." He gulped again as surprise immediately radiated from her serious, sky blue eyes. "To see if you still wanted me to come with you when you ask the Captain about the uniform…"

"Yes." Seven cut in a little too emphatically, "I…believe I will need the support."

"Okay." Chakotay agreed softly, "Although, honestly, I don't think you'll need me too much. The Captain will be delighted that you're asking."

Seven glanced back at her reflection in the mirror for a split second, morbidly struck by the fact that the crack in the glass divided her face almost exactly into the side scarred by unavoidable implants and the more human side, although even there the spider web of an implant splayed at the base of her ear marred the image. How could she presume the right to wear such a visible emblem of Starfleet acceptance when she was so…damaged? "Perhaps." She murmured pensively.

Chakotay, who had intently followed her gaze and felt his heart drop as he guessed her train of thought, stepped briskly forward and firmly gripped her elbow. "For definite." He corrected implacably.

Seven looked up at him uncertainly as she nodded slowly, very aware of the comfortable, warm pressure of his hold on her. "Probably." She conceded.

Chakotay let his grip slacken, he didn't want to push her too far, but at least he'd been there to offer reassurance. He couldn't help but note that she took a deep breath as he let her go, then promptly realised that he was doing the exact same. "I thought we'd wait until early afternoon to talk to her, this morning is quite busy for all three of us. Besides…" He added lightly, "The Captain is most amenable to conversation after her third or fourth coffee of the day, which generally falls just after lunch."

An amused, knowing smile pulled at the edges of Seven's lips but she suppressed the brief urge to laugh outright. "I have noticed that trend in her behaviour also." She told him, shaking her head and giving an exaggerated sigh as he chuckled, "Both the Doctor and I have tried to convince her as to the dangers of caffeine addiction to no avail."

Chakotay laughed louder at her openly joking manner, "There's no hope of that advice taking hold I'm afraid, I've been telling her to cut down for almost seven years now and she only drinks more."

"Maybe you're just not very convincing." Seven suggested teasingly, grimacing slightly when she mentally noted how incorrect that statement was, he'd been convincing _her _to do things that were outside her comfort range at every turn recently.

Chakotay's laugh this time rang a little more awkwardly, though he took it good-humouredly in the sense it was meant, unconsciously shifting uncomfortably as he spoke again, "Maybe, you'll have to ask her." His gaze was suddenly unwavering as his tone abruptly turned serious, "Are you still willing to join me for dinner tonight Seven?"

Seven, in the back of her mind, thought she detected a nervous edge to his soft, velvety voice but quickly dismissed the idea as improbable. Why would _he _be nervous? He had done the asking and presumably had much greater experience with 'dating' than she had… Perhaps he is apprehensive about being so intimately alone with ex-drone? A harsh, pessimistic mental voice hissed, or maybe he regrets asking you at all? She had to close her eyes for a moment as these doubts oppressed her, the now increasingly familiar first spasm of pain from the failsafe hitting her head like a warning shot. As she opened her eyes again though and saw that he'd seen her discomfort and stepped closer in concern, the whole of his handsome face lined with it as he continued to watch her, somehow that sight brought a positive, even light, reply to her lips. "Yes, I am most willing." She told him, "My decision has not altered since last night…"

Hearing the tiny quiver of uncertainty in her voice and so guessing that she'd just stopped herself from tagging a question onto the end of that last statement, Chakotay hurried to reassure her, "I'm glad." He paused for a moment to smile at her tentatively, "Honestly, _I _came to the decision to ask you days ago and I certainly haven't changed my mind."

"Oh." Seven breathed out before she could stop herself, somewhat startled by his timescale. Days? She knew that she somehow managed to make a good impression on him last night but Chakotay considering his offer for _days_ struck her as improbable, too flattering to her to be true. "I…" She trailed off, brushing her hand over her throbbing forehead as her mind rushed suddenly into a decision. "I am not sure of what time I will be able to come…" Seeing his face fall, she hastily explained, "One of my implants must be repaired and I am uncertain how long it will take the Doctor to fix it, that's all."

"You're unwell?" Chakotay broke in, scrutinising her intently.

"It…shouldn't be serious." Seven assured him awkwardly, able to skirt the truth but avoiding telling him a complete lie either. "The Doctor has told me he'll be able to correct the problem, it really just causes…headaches under certain circumstances."

Chakotay tried to smooth out his frown for her sake but didn't quite succeed. "What I saw you have just now looked more like a serious migraine." He said tightly, though he quickly backed off as he saw her flinch in reply, "Don't worry, just let me know when you're available, I can give you the day off if you need it…"

"That shouldn't be necessary." Seven answered firmly, though a second later her gaze and tone dipped shyly, bordering on ashamed. "I would appreciate it if my duty shift for this morning could be altered slightly however, I should probably go to Sickbay now."

"Sure, of course!" Chakotay replied empathically, "Take all the time you need. The most important thing is your health."

Seven forced her eyes up towards his again, but to him her expression still seemed surprisingly muted, her face pale. "Thank you."

* * *

The Doctor was distractedly humming along to the score from Madame Butterfly in his office when he heard the careful swish of Sickbay's doors opening behind him. The tune died on his lips as he saw Seven standing just within the threshold, as tense as a wound spring but with an odd light in her pinched eyes too. "Seven? What can I do for you?" he asked cautiously, "Your next maintenance check isn't until tomorrow…" Really, in his ideal world it wouldn't have set so many alarm bells ringing for Seven to wander into Sickbay unannounced, he would've loved to see more of her casually after all, but as it was he was resigned to her only coming here when necessity prescribed it.

"I am well aware of our schedule Doctor." Seven replied, taking a deep breath before walking straight up to him. "I am here to enquire...about your research into the failsafe incorporated into my cortical node." Another weighted breath left her, "I have…reconsidered your effort to attempt to remove it."

To say that the Doctor was awestruck would've been an understatement, although he supposed he should've been used to her directness of manner by now as he tried to gather his disbelief and delight into a coherent reply. "Really Seven?" he finally asked thickly, letting a smile break out across his face only when she nodded quietly, "Well, I have to tell you how _utterly _relieved I am that you've come to this decision Seven, the dangers of your situation, not to mention the whole range of emotions you were cutting yourself off from completely, had me truly worried about you…"

Seven pressed her lips together, "I presume your concern led you to research methods on how to remove the failsafe?"

The Doctor nodded vigorously, "Oh yes, I've been working on the problem constantly ever since it presented itself." He assured her before his voice became a little disappointed, "Unfortunately I haven't been able to find a way to resolve it in a single operation, it would take at least two."

"Could you start the process now at least?" Seven asked pointedly.

"I'd rather not leave you in this position for a second longer Seven." The Doctor informed her empathically before taking his time to stand back for a moment and study her. She looked pale, tired and decidedly preoccupied. "Seven, do you mind me asking what has precipitated this change of heart?"

She visibly stiffened, her chest going still. "I…merely spent time considering the situation and came to the conclusion that I had perhaps not included all relevant variables when I came to my original decision." She replied with deflecting scientific blandness.

The Doctor was surprised how quickly he saw through that to pick out one particular 'variable', Commander Chakotay, the flesh and blood man this time. Even he, who hadn't particularly wanted to see anything, had noticed that they'd been happy in each other's company during the party the night before and, looking back, he realised that Chakotay had been edging closer to Seven for weeks now. He was grateful that the shift in the relationship had drawn her reckless game of Russian roulette with the failsafe to a halt, but everything else about it left him uneasy, and not just for personal reasons. Perhaps he was judging the Commander's intentions harshly, he knew him to be a good man, but his first concern had to be for Seven and her welfare, didn't it? It would be a tragedy if Seven's first experience of being free of the failsafe was the pain of being hurt. He couldn't help but think back to the story of the opera he'd just been listening to, Seven didn't deserve to be cast aside like a modern day Madame Butterfly, it would set her back so much. It was more than possible, Chakotay didn't have the best romantic track record, and had had a good number of the exotic away mission flings First Officers were infamous for, and then there were the crew's unsubstantiated, but stubborn, suspicions about him and the Captain…

Seeing Seven eyeing him apprehensively, the Doctor put his medical professional hat back on. "That's good to hear and if that's the case I don't see why we shouldn't start now. Be that as it may, it's my duty to warn you that the halfway period between the two operations will be difficult to navigate."

"In what way?" Seven murmured, fear now resurfacing in her voice, "I won't be able to feel the emotions?"

"Oh no, I think you will." The Doctor answered, "In fact, from my study of the failsafe I think your entire emotional range will be more acute. Although the failsafe only triggers at the onset of…" He cleared his throat, "…_certain _emotions, I think it's been systemically dulling your emotional reactions to everything." He squeezed her shoulder, "It will be frightening for you at first, but you'll get through it." He waited for her to nod before continuing, "Your cortical node will be fragile until the process is completed, but realistically we need at least a couple of days between the two stages for safety. The failsafe will still be nominally active during that time…" Seeing her blanch, he rushed to assure her, "But the threshold for it triggering should be much higher. Since you've managed so long with only triggering it once in its current settings, your emotional state would need to be extreme before that happened, which I think is unlikely while you're aware of your condition, right?"

"Yes…" Seven agreed slowly.

The Doctor gave her arm a gentle pat as he showed her a small cortical monitor. "I'd have you wear this between the operations so I can monitor your condition, if anything _did _happen with the failsafe you'd be beamed straight here."

Seven remained in a thoughtful silence for a moment before giving a resolute nod. "Then I give you permission to perform the first operation right now Doctor."

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D I know that the Doctor had the failsafe removal down to a single operation by "Endgame" but this story is only set a couple of days after "Natural Law" so he hasn't had the extra time. Also, as I'm sure you've gathered, the change is important to the plot! **


	26. Chapter 26

**A/n: Thanks so much to NikkiB1973 for starting an awesome new C/7 story, "Shining Star". I hope everyone enjoys this chapter as much as they will enjoy that story. :)**

Seven took a slow, tentative step out of the turbolift and onto the Bridge, still feeling a little disorientated following the first operation on her cortical node which the Doctor had completed less than two hours ago. He'd strongly encouraged her to stay in Sickbay for the rest of the day, but Seven had resisted, only agreeing to don the cortical monitor before leaving. She needed time to process her decision, she'd didn't think the Doctor realised just how suddenly her resolution to deal with the problem had come upon her. She watched the small clutch of faces that made up the current Bridge shift react to her arrival, some, such as Ensign Kim and Lieutenant Paris were friendly and open, while a couple of others veiled their lingering hostility to her as badly as they ever had. Most however, appeared merely indifferent and she somehow found that more difficult to deal with. It made her think, as her head gave a stubborn throb and her fingers nervously grazed the monitor that she'd managed, somehow, to disguise under her skin tight biosuit, that even if circumstances had forced her to act on her cortical node the fears that had urged her to stay within its protective emotional limits certainly hadn't dissipated either.

One person who's reaction to her was definitively out of the ordinary was Chakotay. His eyes had locked on hers so quickly as she'd entered that she had the fleeting suspicion that he'd been watching the turbolift, awaiting her arrival. That thought, coupled with the wide smile that radiated across his face, made an oddly pleasant shiver run up her stiffly erect spine, but she hurriedly dismissed the idea as presumptuous. He was in charge of the Bridge, he had better things to do than check constantly on her arrival! Belatedly realising she'd been standing there, in the middle of the Bridge, staring at him as she tried to interpret his actions, she hastily nodded to him, swiftly stepping down to join him on the lower level by the command stations.

Chakotay stood up hurriedly from his chair as she finally approached him. He found himself once again admiring her gait as her long legs stepped down in one supple move and smoothly glided towards him. He distractedly caught Harry's distinctly intrigued gaze over her shoulder and realised his reaction to Seven was probably being considered weirdly disproportionate, his cheeks even hurt a little from his unconsciously large smile, the rare dimples of his full smile deepening. "You ready to speak to the Captain?" he asked her in what he hoped was a quiet voice.

Obviously not quite quiet enough, Seven immediately got some sharp, accusatory glances shot her way from people who were _supposed _to be absorbed in their work but seemed instead to be turning their attention to other people's conversations. He bristled at their negative assumptions but Seven's response was so slight, her face dipping away from his for a split second, people who'd spent less time with her than he had over the past weeks would've no doubt concluded that she didn't care. "Yes." She answered simply before twitching an eyebrow at him as she added, "That is why I am here."

Chakotay wondered for an instant if she were purposefully flirtatiously teasing him, if she was aware of the fact that a growing part of him wanted her to come here solely to see him, but soon discarded the notion as wishful thinking. She probably just considered his question too obvious considering they'd confirmed this plan together only this morning. "Yeah, of course." He replied clumsily before recovering his composure as he saw her eyes flicker uneasily to the door of the Captain's Ready Room. He gently reached out for her elbow and gave it a gentle squeeze, "It'll be fine Seven."

Seven felt her body relax, instinctively calming at his touch even before he'd cemented the effect with his kind words. She didn't think she was that transparent, but Chakotay was obviously somehow developing a skill for reading, not to mention settling, the wayward emotions she always battling to hide. "Thank you." She murmured, taking a deep breath before marching determinedly towards the Ready Room. Chakotay practically sprinted after her for a couple of steps before remembering to let go of her and follow at his own pace.

"What was _that _about?" Ensign Daltrey, a man not known for his positive attitude towards Voyager's attempts at 'Borg rehab' as he angrily christened Seven and Icheb rescue, muttered in bad-tempered bemusement, "She must've done something majorly wrong to warrant both Chakotay _and _the Captain's attention…"

Tom gave a loud, derisive snort, irritated by the other man's judgemental, even bigoted, stance. "Did it look like Chakotay was anything other than exceptionally…" He cleared his throat, "…_pleased_ with her Ensign?"

A soft, knowing chuckle rippled through the whole Bridge as the more unbiased crewmembers admitted Tom's point. Daltrey reddened in offence as he cottoned onto the mild innuendo, "You're forgetting that he would've killed her via the airlock if it hadn't been for that fluke of her being away from the rest of the drones…" He grumbled bitterly.

"I think that makes it even more romantic…" Celes murmured dreamily from her post, blushing deeply, as easily embarrassed as ever, when everyone turned to stare at her. "I…I just think that being…close after that much hate in the beginning would be…poetic somehow." She stammered defensively.

Now it was Daltrey's turn to snort derisively, "How much drivel have you been watching on the holodeck recently Celes?"

"I do not think knowing details of Crewman Tal's holodeck privileges is pertinent to your current assigned tasks Ensign." Tuvok intoned coolly, having just come on to the Bridge to relieve Chakotay as the Commander had requested.

Knowing that the rumour mill had to shut up shop while Lt. Cmdr. Tuvok was in charge, the Bridge fell into silence, their curiosity left unsatisfied.

* * *

Captain Janeway was leaning so far over her broad desk that she was practically draped over it, intently trying to read the half dozen PADDs she had spread out in front of her all at once, her attention only occasionally diverted to swipe a strand of loose hair away from her strained eyes. Seven, walking with the natural silence of a cat, merely positioned herself in front of the desk and waited. She'd concluded long ago that it was simpler to just await her turn to be addressed rather than risk ire by interrupting. Chakotay was again struck by her passiveness, so opposite to her perceived demanding persona, but remembered their conversation from the night before and knew she'd learned the hard way how to navigate her complicated relationship with the Captain, he had no right to judge that. He however, although his own relationship with Kathryn Janeway was probably even more complex and fraught than Seven's, was unwilling to hang round in anticipation of her notice. Instead he politely cleared his throat.

The Captain's head snapped up, the reflexes unconsciously sharpened by battle revealing themselves. Her eyes widened in surprise at seeing the two of them together and she smoothly pushed aside the PADDs as she gave them her stock smile of distant pleasantness. "What can I do for the two of you?"

Seven froze with uncertainty and doubt as she picked up on the other woman's slight emphasis on the 'two' and shifted uneasily away from Chakotay, suddenly uncomfortable with her decision to bring him with her, although she couldn't pinpoint exactly why. She wasn't helped by the fact that the Captain's questioning frown over her own shoulder towards Chakotay wasn't quite subtle enough for her keen eyes not to catch, even as Janeway wiped the expression away as quickly as it had come as her gaze shifted from Chakotay to herself. Add that to the fact that she could clearly hear the curious babble about this very meeting on the Bridge through the Ready Room's closed doors and she was seriously considering dismissing this wishful idea altogether and returning to her proper place in Astrometrics.

Chakotay was close enough to, and focused on, Seven to be able to hear her tiny but sharp intake of breath at the Captain's question and felt his own frame stiffen in sympathy as he saw her shoulder blades tense and become even more visible through her tight navy biosuit. He opened his mouth to answer for her but quickly reconsidered, instead giving her a slight, encouraging push forward.

Seven managed to avoid stumbling but still felt a flush creeping up to her cheeks, unsure whether it was brought on by the Captain's confused expression or by the light pressure of Chakotay's hand on the small of her back, her skin still tingling from the touch long after he'd withdrawn. "Captain, I…" She swallowed, watching the Captain grow more concerned, "I wish to make a request."

The Captain smiled, trying to put her inexplicably nervous protégé at ease as her own curiosity mounted. "Oh?" She stated in surprise, languidly resting her chin on one hand and arching an eyebrow Chakotay's way even as she addressed Seven kindly, "Of course you can Seven, go ahead."

Seven nodded robotically in acknowledgement, her gaze fixated on her feet. "I wish to be allowed to wear a uniform." She said hurriedly, the words running together. "I realise that I can't wear the officers' uniform, not having been through Starfleet's rigorous acceptance procedures, but…"

She stopped her explanation abruptly as she registered the Captain openly staring at her in disbelief and heard her soft "What?" Seeing Seven, and Chakotay, both flinch in response to her unintentional exclamation, Janeway quickly stood up and strode over to the former, a tentative smile forming on her lips. "Are you sure that's what you want Seven?"

"Yes Captain." Seven replied quietly but firmly after a moment's pause.

Janeway caught her glancing briefly at Chakotay after this confirmation but her pleasure in the revelation made her file away that titbit for later analysis. "That's _wonderful_ news Seven." She said empathically, now letting her smile beam as she grasped the younger woman's shoulders supportively, "I know that everyone will be delighted and moved that you've decided to take this step towards being a real, full-fledged, member of this Starfleet crew." She laughed happily, "Just so you know, you'd pass Starfleet's 'rigorous' standards quite easily, but for now I think you're right, a plain uniform is a great first step."

Seven returned the Captain's smile with a pensive one of her own, taken aback by just how enthusiastic the Captain was. She turned to look at Chakotay, unsettled by the distinctly troubled expression he wore as he watched the Captain. As if he felt her eyes on him, he met her gaze and gave her a reassuringly genuine smile as he warmly suggested to the Captain, "How about we give her that uniform right now Captain?"

Janeway's eyes brightened further, "Oh yes!" she agreed eagerly, rushing to her replicator and dialling in the commands as if afraid Seven would retract her consent at any moment. Chakotay would've been amused by her antics, but as it was she left him cold. He knew Seven had noticed his muted reaction and felt guilty over it, but he couldn't help the irritation that flared as the Captain had spoken. Seven had been a 'real' and 'full-fledged' member of this crew for years! Her emphasis on the Starfleet nature of Voyager irked him as much as it always had, the part of his heart that still clung to his time as a Maquis commander was threatened and offended for the sake of his people, were they still not Starfleet enough for their Captain? He snapped back to reality as the Captain said to Seven, "Why don't you go into the bathroom and try it on?"

Seven appeared a bit startled before nodding numbly as she took the uniform. "As you wish Captain." She replied softly before hastily disappearing into the Ready Room's en-suite as ordered.

When she returned, cheeks flushed and hair slightly mussed from the speedy change, her biosuit discarded over one arm, Chakotay felt himself step backwards, a rush of air leaving his chest. Seven, clueless, frowned at him in worried bemusement, her posture stiffening. The Captain, not so lost for words as her First Officer, exclaimed happily, "Perfect Seven!" Even as she declared that though, she moved forward to straighten the blue accented shoulders of Seven's new uniform.

As the Captain stepped close to Seven, Chakotay felt an unpleasant shiver run through him as he saw the sudden resemblance the uniform brought out in them. He knew part of the reason the Captain was so pleased was the long pursued ideal to remake Seven in her image, but that was the last thing Seven needed, or _he _wanted. He winced as he saw Seven notice his reaction, a hurt look passing vividly over her face before she hid it. "It suits you Seven." He murmured honestly to make amends, and it was true, not many people could make the unflattering square jackets look as good as Seven did.

"Thank you." Seven replied in the same tone before quickly turning back to the Captain, "Captain, I should return to my post, I've already delayed my duty shift today."

"Alright Seven." Janeway agreed easily, smiling at her in approval.

As Seven swiftly turned to leave, Chakotay impulsively reached out for her elbow, upset by the thought that he might have offended her. "I'll see you later?" he whispered.

Seven's carefully impassive face softened as she was met with his unexpectedly pleading expression. Uncomfortably aware of the Captain's presence, she answered with a gentle nod before continuing out of the door.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D It was such a relief to get back to fiction after a long week of writing assignments, but I feel that might have cramped my style a little. I hope you all enjoyed! :)**


	27. Chapter 27

**A/n: I apologise for the lack of chapters over the past few days. I had the long journey home from uni on Friday and have come down with a cold since then, but its time for me to knuckle down and get on with this story like you've all been requesting. Thanks so much for the support everyone. :)**

"Is there something you wanted to ask me yourself Commander?" The Captain asked a moment or so after the doors had slid shut behind Seven of Nine. Chakotay's demeanour had piqued her curiosity somewhat; she'd presumed that he and Seven had just coincidentally come to see her at the same time, after all, what had Seven requesting a uniform have to do with him? Right now though, as he hovered by the doorway, a slight frown hanging over a distant gaze, Kathryn had a strong suspicion she was missing something and her years as the only Starfleet Captain in the Delta Quadrant had made her develop a dislike of that feeling, it was dangerous, especially where her crew were concerned. "Chakotay…" She prompted again, her voice trailing off as he gave a small start, his usually admirably composed eyes blinking at her as if he'd forgotten where he was.

Chakotay felt the uncomfortable warmth of embarrassment creep up his skin as he registered Janeway's searching and openly inquisitive gaze on him, wondering if she could have overheard his whispered question to Seven. He had the irrational feeling that if he looked at her directly now she would hear his thoughts, which would definitely be incriminating in her eyes… "Uh…" He stalled, running a harried hand through his hair as his mind hastily latched onto the first work related thought it could, "I finished the week's crew evaluation report last night if you want to see it…" Kathryn's raised eyebrow at that reminded him sharply that every other such report over the years had been sent from his desk's console to hers without a specific meeting to escort it, but it was too late now. Thankfully, and unusually for her, she didn't comment on the change in routine, though her lips twitched as if she were restraining the urge. Quickly, before she reconsidered, he moved over to the Ready Room's secondary console and swiftly downloaded the report to a PADD before bringing it to join the others already overwhelming Janeway's desk.

She picked it up immediately, obviously not ready to dismiss him. Well, a sarcastic inner voice taunted him; you do _appear_ to be here just to deliver that report, so it must have something worthwhile in it. He wondered then, as he watched her scan-read, why he should feel the need to hide the fact that he'd just been here in order to serve as Seven's moral support. The Captain of all people should appreciate that, but a large part of him doubted that she actually _would_… She glanced up at him then, her focused, level gaze on his as she laid the PADD aside telling him that she'd seen right through the report excuse within a few seconds of starting to read it. "Thank you Commander, the crew seem to be doing well. You should probably talk to Seven about combining this with her personnel efficiency report."

Chakotay grimaced a little despite himself, unsure whether Janeway had mentioned Seven to unsettle him or if he'd entirely imagined it, a completely unintentional shot across his bow as it were. "I will Captain." He agreed smoothly, too practised an officer not to regain his composure speedily.

"I'm sure." The Captain replied, a thoughtful glint in her eye. "You were awfully quiet when Seven made her request."

Chakotay's jaw clenched as he heard the questioning note in her tone. Did she really, honestly, think he could be against it? "Actually…" He corrected her testily, too defensive to consider the wisdom of revealing anything, "Seven came to me to see what I thought of the idea first."

"Oh?" The Captain stated, her surprise evident. "I wouldn't have thought…" She stopped herself, obviously seeing Chakotay stiffen, but he could quite easily finish the statement, she wouldn't have thought Seven would've come to him. "Anyway…" She continued lightly, "I'm glad you decided to encourage her, this is a wonderful step forward." Her brow furrowed and she sighed as she watched him, deciding to brooch her first thought again. "You just didn't _look_ too pleased while she was here that's all." She finished.

"Then you've misunderstood Captain." Chakotay answered a little too hotly, "I'm very pleased for Seven, of course I am, after all this time she deserves all the acceptance we can give her…"

"That's not how I see it at all." The Captain interrupted in a musing tone, "I think this signifies her acceptance of _us_ Chakotay, of what's best for her. She's let go of the Borg now and embraced Starfleet."

"Maybe." Chakotay conceded as he unconsciously released a small sigh, "But you pushed Starfleet a little hard on her, Voyager itself is probably more important than Starfleet right now. Wanting a uniform to fit in with the rest of us doesn't mean she wants to be signed up for Academy entrance exams…"

"Icheb does." She countered defensively, sighing herself as Chakotay shot her a sharp glance, "Alright, I admit they're both individuals and that I shouldn't jump to conclusions." She stood up from her desk, taking her faithful coffee cup to the replicator for a fresh caffeine shot but meeting Chakotay's eyes over her shoulder. "I stand by the fact however that Starfleet would ultimately be the best place for Seven of Nine Chakotay, her attributes would be appreciated and…" A worried shadow passed over her face, "…her past wouldn't matter as much as it probably would in civilian life."

Chakotay swallowed as her point him him, icy fingers of concern clawing at him. "That's probably true." He admitted, surprised at the thickness in his voice as they shared an empathic look, "But that's for Seven to decide for herself." He added firmly.

Kathryn nodded slowly, studying him intently as she did so. "You've gotten closer to her recently haven't you?" She remarked softly, continuing before he could answer, "I should probably stop worrying about that holodeck incident shouldn't I?"

Chakotay flinched, the off-hand comment shocking him more than the more impassioned words of just moments before. "Captain?" he asked tersely.

She gave him a slightly apologetic look, thinking he was still sore over her reaction to his refusal to relieve her worries. The refusal itself still angered her, but at least she could smooth it over by conceding that what had fuelled her concerns had mostly faded with time. "Well, I've decided that she can't have been doing anything too self-destructive with her time in the holodecks if it's helped her reach you Chakotay. Helping her is worthwhile, I promise you."

Chakotay felt numb as her words sunk in. "Thank you Captain." He forced out, the words burning his throat even as he gave a self-conscious shudder, his mind suddenly churning. "I…I'd better be getting back on duty now." The stale words barely had time to reach the Captain's ears before he turned away and walked straight out of the room, not waiting to be dismissed as the sick feeling of guilt he thought he'd pushed away returned, having grown greater and more vengeful in its short absence from his heart and mind. He looked down at the hand he'd used to hold Seven back as she too had left, the fingers beginning to shake under his gaze as self-hatred hammered into him. What was he doing? Had he really believed that just because his feelings had changed he now had the right to hide the facts about their development from Seven? He had always intended to tell her, had planned to tell her on Ledosia for God's sake, why hadn't he? Her right to know hadn't lessened, in fact it had grown with every minute he'd spent with her since. Of course, it didn't need much self-analysis to know precisely why he hadn't one ahead with his intention, he now feared her reaction more than ever, more accurately what it meant for him. She'd be angry with him, upset, and now that was the last thing he wanted, but did he have a right to let his own feelings dictate anything? He'd brought this on himself after all, and knew that he deserved at least some anger for his intrusion. If he never told her then he wouldn't need to face up to the guilt of hurting her, since she'd never know of it, but could he really develop a real, lasting relationship with someone while carrying that guilt around? He sighed heavily, oblivious to the curious stares of the Bridge crew who'd just gotten over Seven new appearance before she returned to Astrometrics. He knew the answer to that. He'd have to be honest, and then accept the consequences.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D** **I did honestly intend for this chapter to be longer, but I'm still not feeling that great so writing is taking a lot out of me. I hope you still liked it though; I'll deal with the reaction to Seven's uniform in the next chapter, since lots of people requested to read that. :)**


	28. Chapter 28

Seven had intended to return to Astrometrics as soon as she left the Ready Room, she'd delayed her shift there for long enough today, but the sudden shift in atmosphere as she stepped back onto the Bridge made her freeze within a few steps of the Ready Room's door. The usual activity of Voyager's hub, happily ticking over merely seconds before, had ceased abruptly. Since all of its inhabitants had their eyes riveted on her, Seven could only conclude that she was the reason for this burst of inefficiency. The urge to run back into the Ready Room and change back into her biosuit rushed through her mind, but, considering that idea counterproductive, she restrained any sign of unease except swallowing back a small lump forming in the back of her throat as she said, "Is there something I can do for you?" The words sounded harsh even to her own desensitised ears, more accusatory than she'd intended, but she hadn't asked for this attention and didn't hesitate to mirror their stares in her own expression as she awaited an answer.

Several people flinched at her question, but from the red that tinged their cheeks and the way they looked away from her for a moment, Seven guessed they were embarrassed by their own conduct rather than offended by her own. She heard a familiar chuckle and focused on Tom Paris with more than a little relief. He had, characteristically, recovered himself first and as he met her gaze his own was as open as ever and as he spoke his tone was one of easy warmth and curiosity. "I think we were all just a little…shocked by the uniform Seven." He explained honestly, "Not that you don't look great…" he added, flashing her a quick grin before shooting a dazed Harry a teasing glance.

Seven set her shoulders back, not sure how to reply to that when everyone else seemed so…disconcerted by her. "Thank you Lieutenant…" She finally began to reply stiltedly.

"What happened?" Ensign Daltrey suddenly asked loudly, cutting her off. "Did the Captain order you to wear that?"

Seven couldn't suppress a flinch as she heard his anger at the idea woven into his voice. "No…" She admitted, stiffening as she noticed the quiver in her answer before continuing in a stronger tone, "I asked the Captain to be allowed to wear a Starfleet uniform and she granted my request."

Even Daltrey seemed to be affected by that, caught off guard. "Why would you do that?" he questioned in genuine amazement.

Seven couldn't hold back a small sigh, part of her, the logical, detached part which she'd relied on almost exclusively for so long, had been asking that same question. She realised she was taking a long time to answer as Daltrey cleared his throat and decided that there was little point in hiding her alteration of perspective. "I believe I may be more cohesive with the crew this way, perhaps 'blend in' more effectively than I have before." She replied, her soft thoughtful tone, more to herself in many ways than her assembled crewmates.

"An honourable, and logical, goal Seven." Tuvok stated levelly from his post at Tactical, pointedly holding her gaze for a moment before calmly ending the brief pause in his work and focusing again on his console.

Tuvok's reassuring words, as close to a declaration of approval as the carefully reserved Vulcan ever came, was enough to push the others forward and Seven was suddenly surrounded by a cloud of positive babble. Harry Kim even moved towards her from the console, smiling at her sheepishly, feeling ashamed that it had taken him so long to speak up, but he couldn't help that Seven's new look had left him more tongue tied than ever around her. He took a deep breath as he began, "It's great Seven, I'm glad you asked, but you were always a part of the crew anyway."

A knot of tension she'd barely been aware of slackened in Seven's stomach so suddenly that she was startled by the mist that formed a veil over her eyes for a moment until she blinked it away, "I appreciate the sentiment Ensign." She murmured thickly, lowering her gaze as she composed herself and shivering as, unbidden, the image of the troubled glint in Chakotay's eyes as he'd seen her in the uniform haunted her again, diminishing any short burst of relief and pleasure.

Tom took the blue accented shoulder of her new uniform in his friendly grasp. "My only sentiment is why you don't have any pips Seven. Living Voyager has been better training than Starfleet Academy could ever be!" He laughed to himself, perceiving just as Seven did that many people stiffened and frowned at his words, but he simply ignored them. He wasn't one to hide his opinions, nor to bow to the pretentiousness of some Academy alumni either.

Seven couldn't be so indifferent however, though as she felt hot blood rush uncomfortably to her face she wished she was. She was too pragmatic to devalue her own intelligence and capability, but also knew that requesting a rank she hadn't earned in the traditional manner would've been a step too far for her to take in the eyes of most of the crew. Witnessing the lingering, though now relatively minor, trials the Maquis crewmembers faced had vividly taught her that. "Perhaps." She muttered, the only concession she dared make to Tom's kindness. Sensing that she outstayed her welcome, and more than ready to slide back into some form of normality, she turned swiftly to Tuvok, "I will return to Astrometrics now." She informed him mutedly.

"Of course." Tuvok agreed smoothly, indicating by his tiny frown in the direction of the others that they were to return to work themselves as Seven quickly disappeared into the turbolift.

A rush of air escaped her chest as soon as the turbolift doors closed behind her and she had to take several deep breaths before she could restore her body to a calm equilibrium and issue the direction to Astrometrics. As the turbolift reached Deck Six, she plunged forward out of the confined space and strode rapidly towards her refuge.

"Seven!" Naomi Wildman's voice ringing down the hall brought her to a halt as the young girl reached her, beaming in surprise and delight. "You got a uniform!"

Seven felt her lips curve up fondly at the sound of her rampant enthusiasm but was too drained to give the full explanation she'd been cornered into on the Bridge. "Yes." She confirmed simply.

"Well, it looks awesome!" Naomi declared before apparently deciding that would be her last opinion on the matter, "I was just coming to Astrometrics to visit you, are you going there?"

"I am." Seven responded, letting herself mimic Naomi's pleased smile as the child confidently put her small hand in her cybernetic one and began to walk with her companionably. "Is there any particular reason why you wanted to see me?" she asked.

"Not really." Naomi replied cheerily, "But Neelix did say he might arrange a kadiskot tournament for tonight, do you want to go with me?"

Seven paused momentarily, feeling embarrassed. It would probably be awkward to explain why she had an engagement with Chakotay. "I cannot attend tonight Naomi, I…" she started regretfully.

Naomi grinned knowingly up at her, "You have a date right?" she finished, "With Commander Chakotay?" She giggled as she saw Seven's speechless amazement, but then, always older than her years in some ways, she gave her friend's hand a reassuring squeeze, "I helped Neelix give the Commander a cooking lesson this morning, I guessed he might be doing it for you."

Why did you guess that? Seven longed to ask, but she reigned herself in and said instead, as lightly as she could, "Then I'm sure I will eat a pleasant meal tonight."

"You will, me and the Commander made sure Neelix didn't put any Leola root in the recipe." Naomi told her confidently before looking over Seven's uniform again, "Do you think I'll get a uniform like yours someday Seven?"

Seven smiled at her then, pushing thoughts of her evening ahead aside for now. "You will if that is your goal. Yours will be red however, as befits a Captain's assistant."

"Yeah…" Naomi said wistfully before adding as they reached Astrometrics, "Maybe I can work in Astrometrics too though."

"I would certainly like that." Seven admitted warmly as they stepped inside to join Icheb.

* * *

Chakotay pensively glanced at the door, his stomach clenching in preparation for a twisting flip flop as he felt the time tick away, growing closer every second to Seven's agreed arrival time, and he knew she'd be perfectly punctual. Distractedly lowering the heat on his kitchenette's tiny cooker, he stepped out into the living area, feeling overheated as well as overwhelmed. The decision he'd come to just hours ago about telling Seven the whole truth, not only about his feelings now but how exactly they'd come to be realised, was gnawing at him more intensely than ever as he approached actually being faced with her. It would hurt her badly, and rightfully so, he knew that, but he also knew that hiding it from her would taint his relationship with her forever if he wasn't honest. Still, he kept asking himself, what right did he have to wreck Seven's peace of mind just to restore his? He wasn't even sure that telling her wouldn't make him feel worse than he did hiding it. He was trusting that she'd forgive him when she understood his side of it, that he'd never meant to hurt her and that he never would again if that was in his power, but what if she didn't, _couldn't_, forgive him? She was happy with him now, if he kept this a secret who was to say they wouldn't keep being happy if she never knew? The memory of his earlier conversation with the Captain brought back his greatest fear however, if he let things grow more serious between himself and Seven, and then she found out what he had done from another source, _that_ would be his true betrayal. No, his only option now, as deep in as he was, was to lay out his cards, his heart, in front of her and see what she would do.

The unmistakable buzz of transporter behind him made him jump violently and spin around to face the intruder in all readiness. In fact, he was faced only with Seven of Nine's clear blue gaze, her head unconsciously cocked a little to the side as she studied his shocked reaction inquisitively. "Am I early?" she queried, an anxious edge to her neat voice.

Chakotay stared at her, his gaze caught somehow on the way her loose waves of golden hair danced with her every moment. He realised he'd never seen her with her hair fully down outside of her holodeck programmes. "You're right on time." He answered honestly after a quick glance at the clock, but couldn't stop his brow furrowing with a question of his own, "Is there something wrong with the door?"

Seven started, she'd considered the impropriety of walking to the First Officer's quarters dressed as she was, but had perhaps dismissed too readily the prospect of offending him with her unannounced transport. Humans were obsequious about their privacy after all. "No…" She tried to answer, flushing more as her tongue began to stumble over her reasoning, "I thought it would be inappropriate, attract undue…attention, if I came to the First Officer's quarters at night, let alone dressed neither in uniform nor a biosuit…" She gestured down at herself, tugging self-consciously at the neckline of her cowl neck sweater, chosen because the collar disguised the bump of the Doctor's cortical monitor placed under her collar bone. Keeping her hair down also served to disguise it, rather than for any aesthetic purpose. If he knew about the failsafe in any way, particularly that she was only halfway into the process of its removal, this date would end before it had properly begun.

Chakotay ran a hand through his hair, her nervousness of being close to him around others was starting to bother him. "I guess I didn't think of that side of it. I'll just need to forget about the unauthorised use of the transporter systems won't I?"

Seven inhaled sharply, her eyes shooting to his, but upon seeing a smile tugging at his lips and a bright twinkle in his absorbing gaze, she soon smirked back. "I suppose you will Commander."

"Don't call me…" Chakotay began to rebuke her automatically, before starting to laugh as she arched an eyebrow at him.

Seven allowed a small laugh to leave her own lips before the alluring smell of cooking food reminded her of her conversation with Naomi. "How is your experiment with cooking proceeding?"

Chakotay stared at her in surprise before his face fell comically. "Which one of them told you?" he asked with an exaggerated sigh.

"Naomi Wildman." Seven answered as she walked into the kitchenette. Her face became pensive as she took in his preparations, "You were not obliged to go to this much trouble…" She murmured uneasily.

Chakotay's fingers laced firmly around her elbow, directing her face back towards his, "I wanted to do it Seven." The conviction and sincerity in his voice made Seven's skin warm up and the arm he held began to tingle. "I needed to improve my cooking skills anyway." He added lightly, his grip on her loosening until his hand just settled resting in the crook of her arm. "I promise there's no Leola root or anything remotely like it anywhere near what we're going to eat."

"Naomi already assured me of that." Seven informed him with a smile, "It is a good thing, I'm not sure if my tactics to avoid consuming it would've been effective with you after you dared me to use them on Neelix." His full laughter at that was soon joined by hers, but she was still mildly curious. "What _are_ you making then?"

Chakotay grinned at her, "The famous 'Talaxian tenderloin in ten minutes' of course."

Seven nodded, but then gave a small frown. "Didn't you learn that at the cooking class weeks ago? Why did you need to be instructed again?"

Chakotay winced a little but tried to hide it, "My culinary talents aren't honed enough to remember a recipe after one try Seven…" He sighed as he realised she wasn't buying that entirely, "Actually, I never went to that cooking class after you…er…refused to go."

Seven stiffened guiltily but still wasn't sure what that meant, why had her lack of participation stopped him _then_? "You didn't?" she asked, her voice tight with disbelief.

Chakotay shook his head slowly but gently pulled her closer to him as she started to tense. "It doesn't matter." He said dismissively, unhappy that the previously teasing mood had dissipated but also knowing that seriousness had to come. "Why were you worried about how you're dressed tonight?" he asked softly, his hand travelling down to hers and squeezing it, "You're beautiful."

Seven ducked her head shyly, it seemed the air had thickened between them, she was struggling to breathe. "Thank you Chakotay, but since the crew are still adapting to my uniform, I did not want to shock them further."

Chakotay's breath unconsciously became heavier as his eyes swept over her. As well as the long cowl neck sweater, a blush pink to bring colour to her pale face, she was wearing a straight black skirt that just grazed the tops of her knees. Her legs were hidden by thick black tights so she was actually very covered up, but in a way he preferred this to the knockout dress of the night before, she looked more approachable and relaxed. "The only way they'd be shocked is in a good way Seven, you're stunning, literally."

Seven's grateful smile in return was a little wobbly as she thought of her earlier confrontation on the Bridge. "Perhaps." She conceded, "The crew seemed to have varying views on it today."

"Well…" Chakotay began, then reconsidered as he caught her subtle but anxious glance his way. "I for one am sorry I wasn't as enthusiastic in the Ready Room today as I should have been, that wasn't really about the uniform…" He trailed off but decided to explain as he realised that Seven was listening intently, desperately. "The Captain's take on it threw me off guard, I don't want you to feel pushed into Starfleet…"

Seven touched his arm to stop him, sighing wryly. "Don't worry on that account. That is just the Captain's way. Starfleet is her vocation, she likes to believe everyone would be better off within it."

Chakotay relaxed as he heard the truth in what she said, but he was more intrigued than ever now. "Do you agree?" he asked quietly, "Do you think you'd be better off in Starfleet if and when we return to Earth?"

Seven bit her lip, shifting back from him as she pondered a question she'd asked herself repeatedly. "I do not know." She admitted, her throat clenching, "I do not know what will happen to me if we return, I try _not_ to think of it…" She swallowed hard and tried to collect herself, "Undoubtedly, I'd need to at least be debriefed by every level of Starfleet about my knowledge of the Collective but as for what they'd let me do after that…" Her voice broke with dread.

"Seven…" Chakotay interrupted, guiding her onto the couch and sitting down beside her, "No one has control of your life anymore except you yourself. Starfleet, nor anything or anyone else, can't stop you from living life like you want to, alright?" He smiled in relief as she nodded shakily, "You won't be alone either, all of the crew are going to face those same issues when we get home to some extent." He told her seriously, taking one of the hands she was distractedly twisting in her lap, "I can promise you though that I won't be more than a transport away from you if you ever want me."

"I will…" Seven admitted brokenly, flushing bright red as she realised what she'd said but then just ran a strained hand over her face as she met his gaze again. "I may be compatible with Starfleet; Voyager has accustomed me to it somewhat." She mused thoughtfully, leaning forward, "However, I have never really been a civilian in my life, it might be better to explore that instead…" She stopped as she felt Chakotay's gaze intensify, "What's wrong?" she asked sheepishly.

"Nothing." He assured her quickly, absently reaching forward to brush a strand of her hair behind her ear, his hand lingering on the blonde tresses. "You just really surprise me sometimes."

Maybe it was the touch of his hand so near to her face, his openly affectionate tone, or the warmth in his dark eyes as he said that, which made the uncalled for thought that she could surprise him much more flit across Seven's mind, but in truth that thought barely had a chance to occur to her at all before she acted on impulse and pressed her lips to his. She realised the enormity of what she'd just done as soon as their lips met, but his immediate response, his warm mouth moulding around hers, made every thought of pulling back from him fly out of her mind. Only a physical need for air broke through her numbed mind enough to make her pull back after those few prolonged seconds and suddenly the two of them had resumed their previous position, face to face on the couch. Seven felt the badly needed air stick in her throat as their eyes locked without a word being spoken. "I'm…" She breathed, further words dying on her lips as she realised she had no idea what to say. Chakotay's gaze, already intense, had darkened until his eyes looked black in the low light rather than their normal cosy brown. Meeting that expression somehow brought on dizziness in her as she felt her heartbeat ignore its regular rhythm and skip continually.

Something in her face must've changed then because his hand suddenly ran down her hair and cupped her chin, the other arm looping around her waist as he pulled her back into him. The kiss was deeper this time, Seven found herself responding with eager instinct to his cues and he immediately reciprocated by intensifying the passion further. Chakotay was blissfully lost in her until her hand curling around his shirt, her fingertips brushing his hot skin under the open collar, and the feel of her tilting in his arms brought the knowledge of just what he was doing flooding painfully back and when they had to break for air the spell of the moment shattered around him.

"I…" He forced out as his chest heaved, his entire body still pulsating with desire and arousal. "I need to…" He stopped again, freezing as she looked at him skittishly, "We have to talk…"

Seven twisted her head away, the panicky note in his voice making a shiver of warning run up her spine which pushed away the heat of the moment. "No." She assured him hurriedly, her voice catching, "We need never discuss this again." She started to scramble up from the couch, "I apologise for my actions…"

Chakotay's hand flew out to stop her standing up, suddenly his skin was ice cold. "God no, Seven, you have nothing to be sorry for…" He felt her stiffen as she sensed a platitude and tried desperately to recover his wits, "I need to explain something to you…please." She reluctantly turned to face him again, her lips were still bright red from their kisses but the rest of her was white with dread as she nodded slowly. He had to look away from her as he tried to drag up the words, they wouldn't come with her looking at him like that. "I knew you had feelings for me…"

Seven's hands clutched her knees until her nails pierced the tights she wore. "I would say that I just made that obvious." She choked out, humiliation making her stomach churn.

Chakotay felt a painful lump in his throat start to suffocate his voice as he nodded heavily in agreement. "Yes…" He whispered, "But I knew about it before." He gulped hard and had to bury his face in his hands to bring the words out, "I saw your simulations of me."

The feel of Seven's hand moving to his arm made him meet her gaze. He had never seen Seven, the most intelligent woman he'd ever known, look so utterly uncomprehending before. "I don't understand…" She said faintly, her stare so vague that she seemed to look through him rather than at him.

"I…I know you don't." He admitted thickly, gently putting his hand over hers, "I wish it wasn't true but…I watched your simulations of…of us on the holodeck…"

Registering what he'd just said seemed to take her a long time, but when it hit her it hit her violently. She ripped her hand, her whole body from him and frantically backed away from him until her shuddering back slammed into the arm of the couch. She was like a cornered animal. Chakotay physically hurt to see her like that, to the point where he couldn't say anymore. A sickened, tremulous gasp left Seven's throat as she was met with his silence. "No…" She rasped out, "Why would you…"

"The Captain was worried about your holodeck use, she asked me to check up on you…" Chakotay began, though he knew that wasn't an excuse and the strangled sound from Seven as she staggered up from the couch proved it. "I know I should have refused, but I was concerned too Seven! I was going to lie, but then I looked quickly and…and it was eye-opening seeing you like that…"

"I'm sure it was." Seven interrupted, blunt and bitter despite the sob he could hear behind the words. Her arm swung around to encircle the room in a frustrated gesture, "This was all out of pity?" she barked harshly, her shaking back to him.

"_No_!" Chakotay cried out, "This was _real _Seven, I've never lied to you, that's why I needed to be honest about…"

"Stop!" Seven almost shrieked, squeezing her eyes shut as agony hit her head in waves, practically blinding her. "Just stop it…please." She whispered hoarsely as she tried to breathe, stepping further away from him.

"Seven…" Chakotay choked as he tried to approach her, tears of guilt and fear burning at his throat and eyes. "I can't stop how I feel now anymore than I can change what I did, I'm asking you to try to forgive…"

Seven spoke as if she hadn't heard him, her voice disturbingly cold and robotic, eerily reminiscent of the drone she'd once been. "Tell me Commander, what is considered more _piteous_? Someone merely losing themselves in the fantasy in first place or that person prolonging it until they believe it's their reality?" She stumbled forward at a run, all remnants of that eerie self-control gone as she bolted from the room.

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D **


	29. Chapter 29

**A/n: Thanks so much for the great response to the previous chapter! It was unanimous that Chakotay was "screwed" as several of you put it, so I thought I'd better update since you're all waiting to see how this messy situation plays out… Enjoy!**

Seven's stumbling run juddered to a painful halt within a few hundred metres of Chakotay's quarters, only sustaining her for long enough to be around a corner and out of direct sight. His words, or at least the meaning she'd garnered from them, replayed in her throbbing head. Pity. Guilt. Lies… Her quaking hand, the embedded implants strangely hot despite her shivering, found a bulkhead to support her weight but her body crumpled forward in desperation as nausea, then breathlessness seized her. She could feel her chest contracting, fighting to drag in air, but no relief came, her heart as well as her head was being crushed. Her feet tried to shuffle forward, but it seemed as if the bones in her legs were crumbling as quickly as the protective, but brief, façade she'd put on before fleeing. Her vision blurred further, unable to focus on the institutional grey carpet in front of her as her knees buckled. There was something agonisingly familiar in the agonised pressure in her skull, hot needles of pain again being thrust through her eyes, but this time burning fluid huddled on her lashes before ripping down her cold cheeks. A groan escaped her, and her hands automatically moved from being coiled defensively around her waist to clutch at her head, as if searching for a release valve.

A shrill, electronic wail hitting her ears made her cringe back further, making the distortion shift from her sight to her hearing. Unable to stand it, she clawed at her throat and chest until she tore the culprit away, her gasps becoming sobs as she felt the blood on her skin but feeling relief as the sound faded, the small device dying in her hand. Crying with pain, she threw it away from her as hard as she could, feeling dazed as it bounced harmlessly against the opposite wall.

* * *

Chakotay stared at the closed door in front of him, the previously pleasantly low lighting in the room oppressively dark as he unconsciously strained for signs of her return. She's not going to come back. She's not going to listen to me ever again, I'll never get a chance to explain properly… These thoughts propelled him off the couch and on to his feet, he hastened towards the door in desperation but her words as she'd stood in this exact spot made him freeze. So detached, so analytical, as if she'd severed any link between her feelings and himself in order to ask that short, brutal question. There had been contempt there too, he deserved that, but it had been directed at _herself_. It was as if the woman he'd known just minutes before, whom he'd _kissed_, had been re-assimilated by the drone she'd once been, the one who'd rather die than stoop to embracing humanity. Had he taken that from her? Would his attempt to erase the wrong he'd done by her push Seven back into her impenetrable Borg shell? He felt something catch in his chest and realised belatedly as he sank back onto the couch that it was a stricken sob, heavy with loss and guilt. _No_. He might…might not be able to get her to forgive him, but he wouldn't allow her to go back, couldn't let what he'd done to her be a mortal wound after she'd begun to recover from so much…

The acrid smell of burning food hit his nostrils strongly enough to force him towards the kitchen. As he distractedly dragged out a smoking version of Neelix's tenderloin, he felt his eyes sting, and not only with the smoke. As he thought of the sweet, easy conversation they'd woven around this meal, the flame of self-hatred that he'd misguidedly tried to get Seven to extinguish with her forgiveness, became an inferno inside him and he threw the smoking plate across the room, tears beginning to flow in earnest as he heard it shatter. "What have I done?" he choked out, "Why…why did I…" His throat closed over, since he could clearly remember his rationale for being 'honest'. What had seemed reasonable before he'd seen the reality of Seven's reaction now seemed like self-deceiving folly. It had been selfishness, all of it, from the beginning. He'd exploited her to explore his own feelings. He thought of hers now, was consumed by them as his anxious mind raked over his painfully clear memories of her reaction. Just after being kissed, one of the most intense of his life and most likely her first ever, he'd admitted that he'd violated her privacy and trust. He knew she felt that he'd used her, that these last few weeks had been a mixture of pity and lust on his side, and while her feelings had been growing he'd been laughing at her. Nothing could be further from the truth, but did that matter? What could he say made him different from Riley or, God forbid, Seska? They'd used _his_ feelings to get want they wanted and then discarded him…

The very idea of comparing himself to Seska made him glad he hadn't eaten as nausea gripped him. He felt weak, hopeless, and soon found himself on the couch again, staring blankly at the door once more…

* * *

Tom walked companionably in step with his wife as they strode out of the turbolift, though with his long legs and B'Elanna's gait fighting not to be a waddle, it wasn't too easy. "So…" He eyed her distracted frown cautiously, "You've heard all about my eventful day up on the Bridge, do I want to ask about Engineering?"

B'Elanna's face, beautiful even when wracked with irritation, snapped around to his. "If you want to ask, ask." She retorted testily.

Tom exhaled, chuckling slightly, "Okay, I'll give. Vorik told me about the incident with the plasma converters in Jeffries Tube 3…"

"One of these days I should remind Vorik that snitching is illogical…" B'Elanna grumbled under her breath as she crossed her arms defensively, her ire slackening off a little as she glanced up into Tom's affectionate and mildly anxious face, "All that happened with those converters is that they were blocked and several people pointed out that in my 'condition', I shouldn't be crawling through Jeffries tubes…" She sighed as her daughter kicked her and she placed her hand protectively over the spot on her belly, but couldn't stop herself from taking the huffing tone she still felt she was entitled to. "I can go wherever I want in Engineering, I _need _to be able to go anywhere in Engineering, it's the 24th Century, not the 19th! I'm not that delicate…"

Tom couldn't restrain his amusement entirely, "B'Elanna, you hate clearing plasma converter blockages, you've been saying so since you took on your post in Engineering…" He reminded her.

B'Elanna allowed herself a wry, self-deprecating chuckle, he had her there. "It's…the principle of the thing Tom…" She argued half-heartedly, her good mood lifting until she saw something ahead of her that made her stop in her tracks. "Seven?" She stared down at the woman she knew as indomitable in disbelief. The blonde was hunched over the floor, her long frame slumped against a bulkhead, her entire body shuddering uncontrollably.

Tom, with his medic training completely ingrained however much he complained about his shifts with the Doctor, took control, moving swiftly forward until he was in front of Seven's collapsed form. "What happened Seven?" he asked in concern as he carefully crouched before her. It took several seconds for her gaze to lift to his, and even when it did it remained empty and unseeing. Her piercing ice blue eyes had dulled to a watery, indistinct grey, mirroring the ashen colour of her face.

B'Elanna inhaled sharply as she saw the tears staining Seven's hollowed cheeks, her heart giving an empathic, panicky twist. To see anyone in such a state would've upset and concerned her, but to see Seven like that was so strikingly abnormal, unnatural even, that it was truly disturbing. "Seven…" She murmured, "You've been crying out here, what…"

A ragged breath rattled loudly through Seven, making both Tom and B'Elanna wonder how long she'd been lying there with her breathing suppressed with sobs. "No…" She forced out, but her gaze was so unfocused that the couple couldn't be sure if she was truly answering them, "_No_…" Her whole body stiffened as if she'd been shocked with electricity and a moan was torn from her as she grasped her head.

Tom knew real, physical pain when he saw it and automatically reached for her arm, flinching back when the searing heat in her implants scorched his palm. "Seven, we're taking you to the Doctor…"

Seven shrank back from him like he'd struck her. "No…I don't need…" She was obviously only semi-conscious, her eyes beginning to roll wildly in her head, but her voice was so brokenly pleading that both Tom and B'Elanna flinched as she half sobbed and half groaned out, "Leave me…_alone_…please…"

Tom's hand moved to her shoulder, careful to avoid any of the badly malfunctioning implants, now sparking with unnerving blue veins of power as well as heat. "We can't do that Seven." He told her with a soft firmness, as if trying to coax a frightened animal.

"Tom…" B'Elanna whispered fearfully, holding out the small object she'd rescued from the floor for him to see.

Tom shivered himself as he saw what it was, then noticed the scratches scarring Seven's collar bone, just visible under her disordered sweater. "That's a cortical monitor, she was probably wearing it…" He broke off as a final, heavy sigh left Seven and she keeled violently forward, now completely unconscious and with her implants surging more violently than ever. Tom held a shielding arm over her as he slammed his hand into his comm. badge. "Initiate an emergency medical transport for Seven of Nine and take me there too, the Doctor's going to need help." He barked down the line and within a moment both he and the patient had been carried away to Sickbay by the transporter. B'Elanna, having to remind herself to breathe for a moment, struggled up and headed straight for Chakotay's quarters, following a hunch.

* * *

Chakotay jumped violently as he heard the door open behind him, filled with an intoxicating mix of elating hope and sickening fear as he turned. "Seven…" He croaked out hoarsely.

B'Elanna's dark eyes, wide with shock as she stood in the doorway taking him in, hardened for a moment. "No." She stated, worry and confusion overwhelming her as she saw her old friend struggle to keep his face from crumpling. "What happened?" she asked bluntly, her voice low and urgent.

Chakotay knew intuitively that she'd seen Seven somehow, her question was too pointed. Suddenly met with B'Elanna's familiar, concerned gaze, the rage of self hatred blazed in him again. "I'm a selfish bastard that's what happened!" he snarled bitterly, unable to rein his destructive thoughts in.

B'Elanna took a startled step back from him, she'd rarely heard such a tone from Chakotay, let alone curse words, not even back in their freer Maquis days. He was such a controlled man, even in anger eerily quiet. His reaction was as out of character as Seven having a breakdown and she knew that they came from the same source. "No, you're not." She assured him softly, "I, nor anyone on the crew, could think that of you Chakotay, and especially not Seven, not the way I've seen you two the past few weeks…" She saw him flinch and twist away at the mention of Seven, as if her name served as salt on a wound, but she wasn't about to back down. "What happened between the two of you tonight Chakotay?"

Chakotay gulped hard, blinking rapidly, and B'Elanna saw as he considered her question that he at one point had been crying as much as Seven. "I tried to…correct a mistake and it when all wrong." He admitted heavily.

He didn't go any further but B'Elanna knew she had to fish for more. "You broke it off with her?"

Chakotay's voice caught, but was painfully intense. "_No_." He had to take a deep breath to calm himself, "I did something I shouldn't have, something which would hurt her if she knew, but I felt I had to be completely honest with her if we…" Unbidden, images and sensations from his and Seven's kiss flooded his mind. He'd never thought much of time travel, but if he could go back to that moment now he would've told her he loved her when that kiss was over and left it at that. That's the only thing he'd _needed_ her to know if they were going to have a future… "I was wrong." He finished damningly, "I've hurt her. I can't tell you exactly what I did, but I don't think I deserve her forgiveness anymore, I never did." He whispered, looking B'Elanna straight in the eye.

B'Elanna was silent for several seconds before murmuring, "Maybe not, but you should give Seven time to decide that herself before you give up."

Chakotay swallowed hard, not quite willing to let himself take comfort from B'Elanna's words. "Have you seen her? How is she?" he asked thickly.

B'Elanna bit her lip uncomfortably before meeting his eyes sorrowfully. "That's what I came to tell you about. Tom and I found her collapsed in the hallway. She's in a bad way, her implants were malfunctioning somehow. Tom had her beamed to Sickbay…"

Chakotay stepped back as if she'd kicked him. "She…she told me she had an operation this morning, something must've gone wrong…" He muttered torturously as he ran past her out of the door.

**A/n: This has to be one of the ****hardest**** chapters I've written for this story, it just didn't come easily. I hope you feel that I've done some justice to the characters and the situation. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! **


	30. Chapter 30

"What happened?" The Doctor demanded urgently as soon as he saw Tom materialise in Sickbay, standing by the biobed Seven's limp form was now prostrate on.

"I'm not sure…" Tom admitted honestly, breathless with anxious adrenaline as he helped the Doctor manoeuvre Seven's leaden limbs into position to allow the biobed's in built scanner to do its work. "B'Elanna and I found her delirious and convulsing in the hallway." The Doctor seemed to be barely listening, seizing his tricorder with speed probably beyond a human and running over Seven in one swift, practised motion. Tom remembered with a pang as he saw the Doctor's features constrict, his programmed mask of professionalism visibly slipping, that that particular tricorder was the one Seven had modified and given the punctilious hologram in the interests of efficiency, a gift he treasured. "Is she…" He couldn't quite finish the question as he stared down at Seven, the spasms jerks of pain racking her long, slender frame from the still angrily sparking implants now looked eerily robotic. It reminded him for an instant, although he resisted the image, of the jolts of a prolonged resuscitation attempt, fighting a useless battle against death.

"No." The Doctor cut in sharply, the word had been forming on his lips before Tom had even begun the question, as if he were afraid leaving time for the unspoken word to hover would make it true. "But her cortical node is failing." His hand smoothly found a particular hypospray on his equipment cart and moved to inject it into Seven's throat in a surprisingly steady mood. "A paralytic." He answered Tom's unvoiced question as Seven's body slumped into motionlessness, although the threatening blue slashes of rampant power continued to surge through her implants. "She needs to be completely still if I'm going to have a chance of saving her and…" He trailed off, a breath that was only necessary to his emotional release escaping him as a sigh as his hands clenched around the metal edge of the biobed. He gripped so hard that his fingers, projections of lights photons that they were, faded slightly as they strained to hold together. "I _told _her to be careful, just for a few days for Go's sake, so that she'd have a chance of this never happening again…"

"This has happened to her before?" Tom asked, staring at the EMH in shock. Surely he would have learned at least some hint of a previous crisis, the Doctor and the Captain weren't exactly known for hiding Seven's issues, probably in the pursuit of justifying their shared protectiveness of their mutual protégé.

The Doctor winced as the question hit home, the guilt that rushed through him almost burning out his emotional subroutines. "Yes, once." He admitted softly, through the words were ragged as he gulped, "I should have forced her let me do something before she went this far…" He murmured thickly as took in her relaxed, _human _appearance with a mixture of pride and painful regret. Slowly, as he commanded the Computer to activate a ventilator, Seven's body had to be completely regulated while he did this; he let his fingertips brush against her chilled face. A flinch of rage managed to reverberate through his stimulated body as he felt the grainy stains of wetness sticking to her ashen cheeks. "She's been crying, who…"

Tom's reasoned blue eyes fixing on his brought him back to the situation at hand. "You can investigate that later if you need to Doctor." He told him, his strict tone making it evident that he didn't approve of such prying, "But right now you need to help her by sorting out this cortical node."

The Doctor nodded stiltedly, pushing concern about whatever extreme emotional event had triggered the failsafe to one side as he began an expert assessment of Seven's condition, his calm gradually returning. "Yes I do and I will need your help Mr Paris."

Tom gave Seven's frozen hand a cautious but brotherly pat as he sent the Doctor a sympathetic look. "Gladly."

The Doctor turned away to carefully gather the specialised tools he'd designed to deal with Seven's implants while Tom, on his order, injected another drug into their patient's veins. "Well then, let's get started while we still…"

He was abruptly interrupted by the loudly reluctant swoosh of Sickbay's doors, the Computer shrilly complaining that the lock had been overridden. Commander Chakotay, who was normally a paragon of composure, tact and natural reserve next to the more volatile woman he served, ran in before the resistant doors had even fully opened, his dark, emotive eyes as confused and distraught as his appearance. He was out of uniform, as, Tom noted silently, Seven had been, and in his own way he looked as bad as the unconscious young woman, as tormented with pain on some level as she had been on the brink of her collapse. He almost collided with the biobed nearest the door in his rush to get in, but froze in place as if he'd hit a forcefield as soon as his eyes fell on Seven's corpse like position laid out on the biobed. Gulping convulsively, gaze still locked on her, he choked out, "What…what happened to her?"

Pity moved Tom to speak as he saw B'Elanna enter the room at a slower pace and put a soothing hand on her old friend's shaking arm. "Her cortical node started to shut down somehow, the Doctor's going to have to do emergency surgery…"

Chakotay finally blinked, his gaze flickering to the Doctor as he spoke before loyally returning to Seven, "She said she had surgery this morning, but it went fine didn't it? She said it was _minor_, what made _this_ happen?" he demanded, unable to stop the accusatory note from his distressed voice as Seven captured his entire attention.

The Doctor bristled and Tom saw his former frustrated expression return with a vengeance, darkening his face like a gathering storm. "I intend to find out _exactly _what happened." He informed Chakotay coldly, looking through him rather than at him as he shifted closer to Seven protectively, "Now Commander, I have surgery to perform and being interrupted like this certainly doesn't expedite the process." His eyes narrowed as he indicated the door with a jerk of his head, "Now, take your leave and I'll contact you when Seven has stabilised."

The hostility in his tone was such that it penetrated even Chakotay's emotional fog as B'Elanna and Tom exchanged bemused and anxious glances between the two men. "Will you?" Chakotay questioned harshly, his voice hoarse. "I'm not going anywhere until I know she's going to be okay." He stated unequivocably, his whole body stiffening in an unconscious expression of his intimidating physical presence, mentally broken as he felt.

"That isn't an option…" The Doctor began to spit out angrily but was interrupted by a warning beep from Seven's biobed and hurriedly twisted away, ignoring after that point not only Chakotay's stricken gasp but also the fact that Voyager's First Officer was there at all as he settled all of his concentration on Seven.

* * *

Time seemed to lag for Chakotay after B'Elanna guided him to sit down, she seemed to be worried he'd let himself fall to the floor otherwise, and then left him with an empathic squeeze of his shoulder and a loving, questioning glance at her husband. He sat where she'd deposited him, his body soon protesting against the narrow metal stool that passed for a chair on Sickbay, but his mind was too lost in the maze of his own thoughts as he watched the Doctor and Tom work on Seven to be able to care. Again, he raked over the events of that evening, now wondering if Seven had shown signs of her debilitating condition approaching and whether he'd been so set on wrecking their relationship with honesty that he'd been woefully ignorant of her in more ways than in an emotional sense. For most of that terrible time though, he couldn't think of anything beyond his worst nightmare, what if Seven…died tonight and he never had a chance to explain? To tell her how he really felt right now with the past discounted, irrelevant?

It was Tom's heavy, exhausted sigh of relief, echoed by a shallower, more uptight one on the Doctor's part, which broke him out of that near catatonic state. He was instantly alert as they stepped back from Seven. "How is she?" he croaked out, his own voice cracked with grief and exhaustion he only now let himself begin to feel.

Tom smiled, it was strained and wan but his eyes were alight with relief and hope. "Okay, I think." He answered after a long wait for the Doctor to speak first, who remained stubbornly silent.

"She's stable now." The Doctor agreed quietly, but as he saw Chakotay automatically move to go to his frail, still unconscious patient, something inside him snapped and the wrath he'd been trying to restrain burst out, "It's no thanks to you Commander so stay away from her."

Chakotay, despite the internal beating he'd been giving himself, still started in shock and stepped back as if he'd been struck. "What?" he asked uncomprehendingly.

Seeing the Doctor's utterly unrepentant expression, Tom did his best to intervene, "Come on Doc, we've all been through the wringer tonight, calm down…"

The Doctor frowned imperiously back at him, "I won't be needing your assistance any longer tonight Mr Paris."

Chakotay, whose full wits were beginning to return as he was so blatantly denied access to Seven once again, gave Tom a grateful look but spoke firmly, "It's okay Tom, I think the Doctor wants to talk to me alone."

The Doctor's stony, unyielding expression told Tom that the hologram did very much _not _want to speak with his First Officer but the pilot decided it was now time to just his losses. He wasn't a counsellor for the jealous and possessive after all, he'd been that man himself before. "Right, okay, see the two of you in the morning." He conceded warily, not taking his time about leaving the room.

The doors hadn't fully closed behind him before Chakotay reached Seven's biobed, her surroundings now disturbingly quiet after the alarms and activity of earlier. Only the steady rhythmical blips of her heart and breathing rate monitors broke through the silence as he looked down at her, his rib cage seeming to enclose his chest tighter as a lump rose up to and then hung at the back of his throat. Her features, somehow taking on a new, haunting, beauty in their pale stillness, may have appeared comfortingly peaceful if not for the frown that encroached on her brow, destroying any illusion of serenity which her luxuriant hair framing her head like a halo might have offered. Chakotay couldn't help but wonder if it were thoughts of this evening, prowling around her dreams, which made that troubled expression linger even under deep sedation. His hand found her motionless one, a shiver travelling up his arm to his heart when he realised that her skin felt colder that the implants encasing it. I'm sorry… He mentally pleaded, longing to whisper the words out loud but with the Doctor's eyes boring into his bent head he didn't feel able to, it was too private, even as she slept unhearing.

Something clicked inside his mind as he reluctantly met the Doctor's burning gaze. "You blame me." He murmured, a statement rather than a question.

The Doctor gulped, and Chakotay saw a flicker of his own guilt reflected in the Doctor's eyes for a moment, but his answer was still stark. "Yes." He paused, as if waiting for him to ask why, but Chakotay left it unsaid. "You…" He began again distantly, his tone accusatory, "She _cried_ over you."

Chakotay's head lowered despite himself and he guiltily lifted his hand away from Seven's as he noticed the tear tracks scarring her face, which only hours ago had been flushed with good humour and pleasure. "Yes." He admitted heavily, "She did, I know that, but I _don't _know why that would put her at death's door like this." He gave the Doctor a cold, frank stare, "She told me she had a small operation this morning, that is was for _headaches_ for God's sake…" His voice broke, "Did _that _bring this on Doctor?" His gaze hardened further as the Doctor's unreadable expression wavered, "Tell me!"

The Doctor seemed startled by the violence of his command, but quickly collected himself. "I can't do that. If Seven wanted you to know she would have told you…"

Chakotay regarded him bitterly, "That's not good enough Doctor. You've made it pretty damn clear that Seven being like this has something to do with me and I want to know how." He sighed when didn't reply, "Doctor, if that is the case that I'll do anything to stop it happening again, I'll help her…"

The Doctor gave a shaky sigh, affected by his latter plea. "It won't happen again, not like this anyway. I managed to remove the failsafe…"

"What 'failsafe'?" Chakotay demanded, hearing the importance of the term in the Doctor's voice but feeling frustratingly clueless about what it meant.

The Doctor began to pace the short loop around Seven's biobed. "Several weeks ago, Seven's cortical node suffered a near catastrophic spontaneous shutdown, just what she suffered tonight on a slightly less severe scale. I discovered, and informed her immediately, that the cause was a failsafe incorporated into her cortical node precisely to deactivate drone when they have certain…experiences."

Chakotay's gaze narrowed impatiently, "What kind of experiences Doctor?" he pressed.

The Doctor bit his lip, his revulsion at even acknowledging whatever it was evident. "When a drone experiences what the Collective categorise as 'excessive' emotion, the failsafe was designed to deactivate that drone. That has been what happened to Seven."

Chakotay stared at him blankly, not willing to believe what he was hearing. As he looked over at Seven however, at the implants the Borg had indiscriminately left her with, and thought of the torment they'd put her through by toying with her even after the crew of Voyager had claimed her as their own, he was hit by the nauseating realisation that in the twisted, sadistic, fundamentally inhumane world of the Collective mind, the scheme made disturbingly perfect sense. The most efficient method of ensuring that separated drones could never lead individual lives in the most essential way… His horror and revulsion overwhelmed him for a moment until he had to put his head between his knees, and in that moment, with tears stinging at his eyes, he made another, almost as distressing, realisation. "Oh God…" He ground out, "That's why she deleted the programme…"

The Doctor was on him in an instant. "Programme?" he snapped, staring at Chakotay in disbelief, "She _told _you about the holodeck programmes?"

Chakotay's response was something between a groan, a bitter laugh and a sob. "Not exactly." He met the Doctor's questioning frown and saw that he owed the Doctor a level of honesty too. "When Seven was spending so much time on the holodecks, the Captain…she got the idea in her head that Seven was developing a holodeck addiction, or that the programme was dangerous somehow…" He snorted bitterly, Kathryn had no idea. "Anyway, she insisted that I check up on it, ordered me to…"

"You _spied _on Seven of Nine just because Captain Janeway _ordered_ you too?" The Doctor exclaimed, horrified, respect for either involved in such a plan falling away.

"I was going to lie without ever going into the holodeck, I should have, just to get Kathryn off my back, but in the end I didn't. I watched Seven's programmes. I didn't set out to, but seeing her like that, so relatable and human, I thought that watching would help me to understand, then she could be like that in real life…"

"I presume you didn't peep right up until the point she collapsed with the failsafe, considering you didn't come to her aid?" The Doctor asked acridly.

"_No_!" Chakotay snapped, "Do you think I would've tried so hard to get close to her if I'd known that by doing so that damned failsafe could trigger? I watched until her first date with…me, with the hologram of me, and then I stopped, I knew I'd gone too far. The next thing I knew she'd deleted the programmes…" He pressed his clawed hands over his skull, "I could've _killed_ her, all these weeks of being with her and this could've happened at any time…" A broken sob left him but then he glared at the Doctor, "How could _you_ have let her live with that for so long? Going to Ledosia with me could've killed her, going to the party, hell_ anything _could've set it off…"

"I know." The Doctor interrupted, "I did try to reason with her Chakotay, but after the shock of the holodecks she insisted she _needed_ the failsafe to keep herself in line. She was ashamed of the programmes, guilty over her preoccupation of them, but I think mostly she was_ scared_. Scared that she wouldn't be able to handle the emotion, that the Borg were right about her."

Chakotay had to take several breaths in as he heard the truth in what the Doctor said. "That would be just like her…" He muttered painfully as his gaze shifted over to her once again, "It's not fair…"

The Doctor swallowed, "No, no it's not." He paused for a while before adding reluctantly, "I'm not sure you deserve to know this, since it was obviously your rejection that set her off tonight, but that operation this morning, it was to start the process of removing the failsafe, I assume she did that because of you. The reason why she so nearly died tonight is because the process was only half-completed and the surgery made her cortical node less stable than usual. I was going to split the operation over a few days to reduce the risk to her, but because it triggered tonight I couldn't take the risk of not operating right away, thankfully she seems to be coping so far." His next sigh was one expressing his own guilt, "I thought she'd been fine for a few more days, the threshold for the trigger should have been higher than before, but I must've been wrong…"

"No…" Chakotay choked out agonisingly, "She should have been safe, but I put her through more than a hologram ever could."

**A/n: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! :D I apologise for not having this up yesterday like I said it would be but as you can see it ending up being angsty **_**and**_** long, too much for one day's worth of writing, lol. **


	31. Chapter 31

**A/n: I apologise for the total lack of updates, travelling, illness, writers' block, I've had it all this week! Thanks to NikkiB1973 for giving me plenty of great chapters to read, an update of 'Shining Star' and two chapters of her new P/T and C/7 fic, 'The Night Shift'. :)**

Chakotay's broad hands, clenched around his knees until they were cramping, stiffly moved to cradle his face. His shoulders, normally the strong, defining line of his reasoned, controlled stance, had long since buckled under the sheer weight of the guilt he was feeling and could no longer keep his lowered head remotely steady even as he did nothing more than fixate blankly on the dull grey floor that made the glare from all the coldly metallic medical paraphernalia surrounding him all the more stark, torturing his strained eyes until they were bloodshot. In vain, his fingers, throbbing with a strange ache that seemed to originate in his chest and radiate outwards, moved to shield his eyes but when he tried to shut out the reality of Sickbay his mind's eye took over, presenting him with much more tormenting scenes. Not only the memory of his doomed revelation to Seven, although that, the juxtaposition of their passion then his unwilling destruction of it, was on constant reply, but also much further back, in the holo-programme that had started all this. Why hadn't he realised there was a deeper, more deadly problem than just psychology? He remembered now, vividly, those flashes of pain that had blazed across her face in moments of intimacy, why hadn't he questioned that? Surreal though the experience had been, he should have picked up on the physical pain, just as he had shared her happiness and been moved to alleviate her guilt and shame. Logically, he knew he could never have guessed, just from Seven deleting the programme, that the Borg had planted a time bomb inside her but now that it had almost killed her, for a second time if the Doctor was to be believed, he couldn't help punishing himself for failing to hear it ticking while he'd been so purposefully intent on her for his own, selfish, reasons.

A very different type of warning, a change in tempo in the steady chorus of otherwise undecipherable beeps and clicks echoing through the room from Seven's bedside, broke off his train of thought like a lash of a whip. He may have let himself slip back into the emotional labyrinth of his mind while he'd been helpless, but that didn't mean he'd been utterly ignoring the reality of the Doctor attending to Seven either, he'd been subconsciously following the regular beat of the many monitors as if it constituted a macabre piece of background music. To hear such a sudden change after more than three hours made panic revive him, sitting bolt upright in his chair to interrogate the Doctor.

The EMH had pre-empted him, his gaze already steadily on him even as his tricorder did a final, slow sweep over Seven. "It's alright." He said softly, although Chakotay saw that even as his lips turned up with relief he still appeared rather grim. "She's waking up."

Chakotay himself was surprised at the volume of his own relieved sigh, it boomed disconcertingly around the room as he forced himself up onto shaking legs. He took one long stride forward before freezing as he saw Seven in close focus again, guilt and uncertainty paralysing him. "Is she out of danger?" he croaked out, shame rearing its ugly head within him as he was overwhelmed with an urge to bolt without hearing the answer.

The Doctor's measured pause seemed dreadfully long to Chakotay, "I believe so." He answered finally, "Her cortical node has stabilised and is functioning within normal parameters, but I'll need to convince her to stay here for at least two days of rest and monitoring before I'll be certain that her health is safe."

Chakotay visibly gulped, his eyes moving heavenward for a split second in a grateful acknowledgement to the sprits and ancestors he'd thought he'd forsaken long ago but he'd still found himself pleading and bargaining with relentlessly over the past couple of hours. He was able to take the few remaining steps to stand beside Seven. She was on the very edge of waking, the tension of consciousness slowly returning to her limp frame. He could see her fine shoulder blades digging painfully into the unyielding surface of the biobed as her taut, papery eyelids fluttered feverishly, the golden gilt of her eyelashes brushing eerily against her chalky, drawn cheeks. Her lips, cracked and bloodless, parted in a weak groan and Chakotay winced. "She's still in pain?" he questioned as his hand moved to rest comfortingly on her exposed cybernetic arm. The metal no longer burned, but it was still unnaturally warm compared to the tepid skin underneath. However, he was reassured to be able to feel the strong rhythm of her pulse under his thumb where he was rubbing her wrist.

The Doctor sighed bitterly, "Her body is almost 20% cybernetics, which isn't exactly natural. She's always in pain at some level no doubt. This however, will test even her stoicism. I wouldn't be surprised if it takes a week or more for her headache to fade away completely."

Chakotay felt his heart squeeze as this harsh truth hit him and he had to swallow as he looked down at her. "Can…Can I stay?"

"That's ultimately Seven's decision." The Doctor reminded him. His face wasn't without understanding and empathy, his protective stance had softened since Chakotay had explained everything, but Chakotay knew and accepted the fact that the EMH would always be in Seven's corner, as he should be. "But I'm not going to throw you out either, just step back a little, I don't want her to be confronted with all this right away." Chakotay gave a nod of grateful agreement, he realised that crowding her immediately wouldn't help his case, but it was still with definite reluctance that he let her go and stepped back until he had almost returned to his chair. The Doctor gave him a wan smile of support as he picked up a hypospray and pressed it firmly to Seven's throat. He registered Chakotay's flinch and said reassuringly, "It's a mix of drugs to wake her up and to relieve her pain, don't worry." Chakotay began an apologetic murmur but soon the attention of both men was taken up by Seven starting to stir. The Doctor smiled at her warmly, gently squeezing the shoulder of her human arm, as he saw her distinctive blue eyes, vivid even then, appear from under her leaden lids. "Good evening Sleeping Beauty."

Seven stared up at him uncomprehendingly, but as she rubbed a vague hand over her damp brow Chakotay saw her flinch at the word 'beauty'. "Doctor…" She mumbled, her voice weak and slurred before she shook her head slightly and her voice steadied, "What happened?"

Chakotay felt an indecent hope, for a split second, that she'd forgotten the whole evening before his horrified conscience crushed it. "Well…" The Doctor began awkwardly, "Tom and B'Elanna found you collapsed in the hallway. You started to have a seizure and Lieutenant Paris beamed you straight to me." He halted, bending down further so that he was more level with her face, "Your emotional failsafe had been triggered again, I had to complete the process of removal much sooner than I'd have liked, but I think you're going to be fine."

A dazed frown settled over Seven's face, "The failsafe? But…" Her breath abruptly caught in her throat and the Doctor and Chakotay both grimaced out of her line of sight as they realised she must be remembering. Seven herself felt the shock of those few moments in Chakotay's quarters reassert itself viciously, crashing into her chest and leaving her breathless. Every time she did try to catch her breath all she could hear were ragged gasps which verged on broken half-sobs she couldn't quite let out. She shifted away from the Doctor in panic but unfortunately by doing so she glimpsed Chakotay far to her left, visibly stricken but silent. Stubbornly, she flipped back onto her back and stared up at the ceiling, trying to ignore the hot pressure welling behind her eyes as she continued to sense the dark eyes which had hours ago so absorbed her now boring into her relentlessly. Finally, though it may have only been a few seconds later, she forced herself upright, keeping her gaze locked on the Doctor. "Since you've managed to repair me, can I leave?" she asked desperately.

Chakotay felt her name form pleadingly on his lips but it wouldn't come. He knew that if he'd been able to tell the Doctor part of the sorry story he should have been able to say all of it to _her_, but her reaction seemed to have killed his voice and then buried it. He could only be mute as he gazed at her, his vision blurring.

The Doctor placed his hands on her shuddering arms as he carefully pushed her back down onto the biobed. "I'm afraid not Seven." He replied with real remorse, he wasn't enjoying this anymore than Chakotay, "It was just too close a call this time, you're going to have to stay here to be monitored for at least two days if you want your body to regain its stability."

Seven's face began to crumple then in a way neither man had witnessed before, the finely shaped nails of her human hand digging into the edge of the biobed until they looked ready to break. "But…But…" She grasped frantically around for something redeeming and familiar, feeling as if she were drowning. "What about my work?" she finally managed to demand, "What will the Captain think? You _cannot _tell her…"

The Doctor exchanged a quick glance with Chakotay, swallowing slightly as he made a quick decision, giving Seven's hand a reassuring squeeze. "I'll deal with that right now, alright?" he said tightly, addressing them both, before swiftly moving over to his console and dialling in a command. The Captain's face, strained with tiredness but otherwise attentive, appeared almost immediately.

"To what do I own the pleasure at 2330 hours Doctor?" she asked pointedly, although there was concern as well as mild irritation in her eyes as she read the hologram's serious expression.

"I need to let you know Captain, that Seven is on medical leave until I say otherwise."

Janeway's face paled, "What happened? I saw her just this afternoon and she seemed fine…"

"She must've been putting a brave face on it Captain." The Doctor replied grimly, "I performed a…minor operation on her cortical node this morning. It seemed to have gone fine but things deteriorated tonight. She's stable now but I'll need to monitor her in Sickbay for at least two days without exception."

"Understood Doctor." The Captain agreed instantly, "Is she up for visitors? If I know her, she's bound to get cabin fever down there, despite your company…"

The Doctor's mind froze for a moment. "Uhh…I'll let you know in the morning Captain, it's been a difficult night."

"Of course." The Captain answered with a weary smile, "I'll let you get back to your patient then Doctor."

"One more thing Captain." The Doctor added hastily as he saw that the conversation was drawing to a close. "I also had Commander Chakotay in tonight. He has…Tarkaelian flu, so I've also given him a couple of days of medical leave, at my discretion.

"Tarkaelian flu?" The Captain echoed, a doubtful crease forming between her fine brown brows, "I saw him at that same meeting him Seven and I saw no signs of flu, not even a sniffle…"

"It can come on very quickly." The Doctor explained, "Sometimes it can fell a human within an hour." He pushed down a flicker of guilt, Tarkaelian flu _was_ particularly nasty, and Chakotay was so downbeat right now it wasn't entirely beyond the realms of possibility that he was ill. The Captain didn't need to know it was a sickness of the heart.

The Captain winced, "That doesn't sound good." She made a thoughtful pause, "Tell me Doctor, it _is _just a coincidence that the Commander and Seven of Nine are unwell at the same time isn't it? That they're sharing medical leave?"

The Doctor's hands clenched around the edges of the console, what did the Captain think was happening? That he was letting Chakotay and Seven use Sickbay as some kind of romantic rendezvous point of her sight? He bit back a sigh as he thought wryly how preferable that would be to the true situation, Seven had withdrawn back against the biobed, her face empty, and Chakotay hovered as if he could see a forcefield around her but was too afraid to try and test its strength. "It's the simplest kind of coincidence Captain." He answered smoothly, thinking as the Captain gave a satisfied and even slightly sheepish nod that he really wasn't given enough credit for his considerable acting skills.

"Goodnight then Doctor." The Captain said pleasantly, "Keep tabs on the crew, I don't think we want a Tarkaelian flu epidemic on our hands."

"Certainly not." The Doctor agreed firmly, "Goodnight Captain." As soon as her face had faded away completely from the screen, he walked up to his replicator and ordered a dose of pills, which he promptly pressed into a stunned Chakotay's hand, "Sleeping pills." He said, answering the unspoken question, "I think you'll need them tonight Commander, don't you?"

Chakotay responded with a heavy nod, his hand closing around the pills as his eyes moved cautiously over to Seven, who flinched but otherwise remained silent and unresponsive. Chastened and exhausted, he looked to the Doctor, "Thanks." He murmured hoarsely, shooting one last pleading glance Seven's way before retreating out of Sickbay.

The Doctor breathed a weighted sigh, not disguising his exasperation, as the doors shut behind the Commander. "You know Seven…" He began quietly as he returned to her bedside, "I don't believe he ever intended to hurt you, not really." He sighed again as he swept his tricorder over her, "You should at least allow him to talk to you, you owe your feelings for him that much."

Seven's eyes had closed, but now they snapped open as she pulled herself upright again. If he'd been expecting a response to his advice he was misguided. Dragging a limp hand across her face, able to feel the lingering gritty dampness of tears and the stickiness of ruined makeup, she said dully, "If you're not going to let me leave, can I at least wash my face?"

The Doctor's stance softened with fresh sympathy, "Yes, of course." He told her softly, moving towards the replicator once more, "I'll bring you a cloth and warm water." He watched ruefully as he fulfilled the request and she began an attempt to pull herself back together.

As if she could feel his eyes on her, Seven stopped, her face now as red as her eyes after an overly rigorous rubbing with the hot facecloth. "I have nothing to discuss with him Doctor." She forced out hoarsely, her frame now erect with proud defiance even as her eyes glistened, "I brought this embarrassing situation on myself by indulging in human weaknesses I have no right to desire." She was gritting her teeth so much the words left her without her lips moving, "I will not commit this grievous error again…"

The Doctor stared at her, his face white. "You know…" He muttered, almost to himself, "…that's definitely the cruellest thing the Borg did to you." Although she didn't react, didn't ask for any elaboration, he somehow knew that she needed to hear it. "Not the failsafe itself, but the ideology behind it. They've made you believe that it's inherently wrong, _weak_, to love another person when in reality nothing could be further from the truth."

He gasped as he saw that silent tears were now rolling unhindered down Seven's cheeks.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	32. Chapter 32

**A/n: I apologise for the lack of updates again this week, I've had a lingering migraine-y headache all week that's really slowed me down typing wise. At least going slow has meant an extra long chapter for this though. :) Enjoy. **

The Doctor sighed as he carefully picked up an already sterilised sample beaker and distractedly ran a cloth over it, frowning tiredly at his reflection on the curved, gleaming surface as he did so. He tilted the beaker back in his hands, grimacing slightly as the resulting reflection gave him a glimpse of Seven of Nine's still form on the biobed. She hadn't moved yet, if he didn't already have her detailed bio-readings constantly updating on the console next to him and thus knew her malady wasn't rooted in her physical condition, he would've been overwhelmed with the need to check her again. Even knowing he had done all he could for now, he was finding it very hard to keep his distance, to give her the space he was beginning to doubt would help. He'd always been that way with Seven; she could activate the full range of his emotional subroutines all at once. It hurt that he couldn't reach her at all when she undoubtedly needed someone. The only compromise he'd been able to come to with his two warring factions of thought, the one who wanted to prod and pet her until she recovered from this, and the other which fully advocated the detached 'tough love' approach, was to remain here as a silent, hopefully comforting, presence. So that was why he'd spent the last hour aimlessly toying with whatever object came to hand in his Sickbay, trying to convince her he was busy and unconcerned…

The beaker slid from his hand, forgotten as his concentration got lost in the maze of his worries. A dull clinking sound rang momentarily through the room as the beaker's reinforced plastic kept it intact even as it hit then rolled across the floor. The Doctor didn't move to rescue it right away, having caught Seven's reaction to the noise out of the corner of his eye. She flinched more violently than she should have, almost as if she'd been roused from sleep, but her eyes had been open, vacant and expressionless, since she'd shut down after their last exchange. Maybe he should check her for shock one final time… With another sigh, he moved across the room as unobtrusively as possible. At the moment Seven reminded him of a piece of delicate blown glass, ready to shatter spontaneously if as much as a sound wave disturbed her, and already starting to fracture. As he knelt to recover the beaker from where it had rolled under his diagnostic table, the obnoxious yelp of his comm. badge made him grit his teeth as he tapped it to open the closed line, "The Doctor here."

"Doctor, it's…umm, Ensign Kim here…" If the Doctor had been in a better mood he would've smirked, he could practically see Harry Kim's discomforted, flushed face through the comm. badge and if his medical experience told him anything it was that if a person was more embarrassed that scared when they called a Doctor it probably meant the injury wasn't life threatening. "I kind of had another accident on the holodeck again…" Harry continued after awkwardly clearing his throat.

"More night time paragliding session with Jennifer Delaney, Ensign?" The Doctor asked in dubious amusement.

"No, er, she decided we should try cliff-diving this time…" Harry replied sheepishly before gasping out a sharp grunt of pain, "Jenny thinks she's broken a few bones in her feet and I've _definitely _dislocated my shoulder…"

The Doctor bit back an irritated sigh, but his efforts didn't really soften the condescending note in his tone, to Harry's ears at least. "You know Ensign, I'm in complete support of Crewman Delaney's attempts to…arouse your hidden daredevil, but you have to remember that the holodeck safety mechanisms will only protect you so much, hence all of your recent visits to me. May I suggest that you add a dash of culture to your next date? I'm perfectly willing to give the two of you access to one of my opera programs."

Harry chuckled weakly, the movement obviously irritating his injury somewhat as his voice caught slightly, "I'll consider it, thanks, but would you mind paying us a house call to our programme right now?"

The Doctor felt a mix of relief and regret flood him as his eyes involuntarily found Seven again. He was of course unwilling to expose her to even Harry's kindly, guileless gaze at the moment but the thought of abandoning her here sat uneasily within him. "Of course, I'll be right there." He assured his crewmate softly, exhaling heavily as Harry muttered a quick, bashful thanks and the comm. line clicked swiftly off. "His new relationship with Crewman Delaney must be going well, he's really been pushing the boundaries for her, this is my third 'holodeck call' for the two of them in the space of a month. Who would've thought it?" He mused lightly, biting his lip when Seven didn't move a muscle. Her characteristic eyebrow didn't even twitch upwards in wry response. "I'm going to have to go, will you be alright here by yourself?" he asked tightly, cautiously approaching her biobed, his hand reaching out to touch her arm before he thought better of it, the limb falling despondently back to his side. "My programme is linked to your monitors; if any of your implants go awry I'll be back here in the time it takes to issue a command to the transporter…"

Seven's chest moved upwards in a laboured sigh, making the Doctor jump somewhat despite his prodding of her. Her dull eyes focused on him momentarily as she exhaled the breath, "You have already repaired me Doctor." She reminded him quietly, "I shouldn't serve as an obstruction to your duties."

"Oh Seven…" The Doctor murmured remorsefully, this time not restraining his urge to touch her, his fingers brushing the chilly skin of her hollowed cheek, "You know_ I_ can't…repair what's wrong this time. Only you can decide to do that, and talking it over, unburdening yourself somehow, is the way I advise you to do it." He stepped back sharply as he realised that she'd stiffened again, as frozen as an ice statute, her gaze lazily trailing after the light bouncing off the ceiling above her. He couldn't take this anymore, didn't want to be the one standing uselessly by her side as she continued her self-destruction…

Seven watched him leave out of the corner of her eye, his too hasty, agitated movements as he snatched up his medical bag and stomped leadenly out. Whatever had held her together, perhaps the sheer pressure of his presence had managed to contain her inside herself, deserted her as the hiss of the doors sliding closed cut through the dense air. As she rolled onto her side away from the doorway, the rush of loneliness that flooded her was enough to crack her mental walls and a sob so loud and guttural that it shocked her into flinching managed to escape. Then another, and another… Her ribs felt like the bones were going to split apart, her lungs felt full even as she struggled to breathe. Instinctively, her knees drew up and locked tight against her chest, her quivering arms encircling them with a surprising strength. Soon her face had also curled inwards, and as she squeezed her eyes shut as tightly as she'd compacted her body, she felt irrationally safe, grasping at this fragment of control…

As soon as the feeling came over her, a choked, bitter laugh rose up between the sobs. She could see the last time she'd used this tactic in her mind's eye, cowering under the Raven's piloting console, bunching her tiny frame smaller and smaller, more insignificant, less relevant to the encroaching invaders of her settled world. It hadn't worked then; the drones had found her with ruthless efficiency, her terror and grief ignored… Slowly, she forced her stiff body to uncoil like the metal spring it so resembled; retreating to childish impulses would only prolong this. The self-discipline in this action brought back a thread of rational thought, and she found herself dissecting the Doctor's words. Unburden herself? Talk it over? Talking involved explanations she couldn't drag out of her heart, and who exactly was she supposed to talk_ to_? The Doctor had already involved himself enough, as for the Captain; this situation would only give rationale to her well-established belief in her Borg protégé's emotional dysfunction. As for the rest of the crew, some of them undoubtedly were friends, or as close an equivalent she could get to some, but even they, when confronted with her recent decisions, would surely declare her deficient in some way, might even dismiss her as having a defective form of humanity.

No, the only person she'd ever let in at that level was the very person who'd helped to deepen this self-inflicted wound. She swallowed hard. Yes, she'd been deceived her vision of a relationship with him, but she'd coped with that before, hadn't she? What right had she ever had to conjure up such fantasies anyway? No, the furiously beating heart of this agony was that she'd lost the sole person she might've confided in…

* * *

Chakotay's fumbling fingers managed to dial in the access code to his quarters on the third attempt, but as he started into the darkened room which should have been comforting in its familiarity, his legs suddenly felt even heavier and he had to blindly grasp at the threshold to be able to stumble inside. "Computer, light…" He started to order just as his eyes fell on the room's current light source, a slim candle which cast a ghostly gleam over the table still laid for a dinner for two. His jaw clenched involuntarily, "Belay that." He forced out. Seeing the innocent romance lovingly weaved into these surroundings was the last thing he needed right now. What _did _he need? He glanced self-consciously down at the sleeping pills cupped loosely in his hand, already beginning to melt in his damp palm. There was a definite appeal to gulping them down, a quick fix oblivion style. The guilt, the fear and grief, it would be hidden away in a drugged smog for a couple of hours at least. Still though, he made no move to take the escape, feeling frozen. The pinpoint red standby light on his replicator suddenly brought an aching thirst to his throat, the machine's best efforts to approximate a scotch whiskey, or maybe the near tasteless potency of vodka, would probably do the trick just as well. Might even give him that deceptive floating sensation, the closest to freedom and pleasure he could feel right now.

He promptly threw the pills to the carpet, purposely crushing them underfoot as he turned his back on the replicator. He couldn't do that, not now. It would be disrespectful to Seven, let alone to the crew he'd promised his commitment to. That dark cycle in his life had ended, no matter how much he felt that familiar pain creeping back. Intensity, that was his problem, everything he felt was always so acute. Contrary, his father had declared him, unable to settle, to find peace. It had started long ago, before little Annika Hansen had been violated by the Borg, when as a hot-headed, self-righteous teenager he'd rejected everything his family had lovingly instilled in him and had run off to Starfleet in pursuit of glory as well as purpose. He hadn't even enjoyed it that much in the end, the Academy. It served him right that he'd chafed there as much as at home. Then, just as he'd thought he'd accepted his past decisions, his roots had been mercilessly burned by the Cardassians, his family dead. Most of his crewmates believed he'd joined the Maquis' crusade immediately, before the ash had even settled on his father's grave, but the story wasn't as honourable as that. In reality he'd escaped to the bottom of several bottles, leaving Starfleet but hiding in a bar or a dark hotel room rather than in the Badlands with the Maquis. It had been like that for weeks, trying to dull the blow, induce apathy. It had almost worked too, his detachment had been toxic and people had avoided him like the plague. It had taken his first love, Svetlana, and her story of revenge against the invaders who had killed her husband and young children, to awaken that rage as powerful and all consuming as his old passion for her. That had crashed and burned of course, he didn't love often but when he did it was a flame that flared fiercely until it sputtered out. He'd often wondered why that was, why his relationships seemed to combust spectacularly. He'd always thought he just chose the wrong women, Seska being a case in point, but analysing his recent behaviour he wondered whether he sabotaged his relationships, consciously or not. He had an addictive streak, and love was as much a drug for him as alcohol had once been. Maybe he was pushing it away, only in moderation, never too close… Was he that irredeemably jaded? If so, then Seven, with her purity of heart, most certainly deserved better…

* * *

Chakotay felt the grittiness of sleep dried tears in his eyes as the beep of his comm. badge finally reached his dulled ears. He stretched out his long legs as the singeing pain of cramp gripped his muscles. Blinking blearily as he struggled to regain focus, he realised he'd defied his own decision and fallen into an exhausted sleep on his couch, his tall frame far too long for the dumpy piece of furniture. One glance at the wall clock's glowing digits told him he'd been out for over an hour, and that was without the Doctor's helpful drugs. He remembered what had woken him as his comm. badge, barely clinging on to his dishevelled dress shirt, gave another soulful beep. "Will you come to Sickbay?"

Chakotay's heart managed to thud violently even as it twisted as he recognised the voice. Seven. How could she _possibly _be calling him right now? Was he dreaming? Quickly, he pinched the back of his hand, _hard_, inhaling sharply when the expected instant of pain came. Real then. She sounded normal, or perhaps 'steady' would've been a better description. It was eerie, considering what he'd witnessed in Sickbay…. "Com…Commander?" There it was, the hitch in her clear voice made his hands clench guiltily and he realised he'd been ignoring her. She, taking the first step and so being much braver than he, was being met with silence.

He slammed his hand against the comm. badge so hard that he was sure Seven must've heard the impact through the line. "I'll…I'll be right there." He breathed, forcing down the lump in his throat when her only reply was the comm. line clicking off a few seconds later. Hurriedly, he shoved his uncooperative body upright, a nervous shiver enough to make him pause to shrug on his discarded uniform jacket over his casual clothes as he ran out.

* * *

Seven's arms nearly buckled under her in her haste to sit up as she heard the doors begin to open. She hadn't actually expected him to come. Or perhaps had hoped he wouldn't come, she mentally conceded as her heart sprang into her throat, bringing nausea along with it. He stepped inside just as she twisted around to look him full in the face. The jacket thrown over the thin shirt, the short hair still succeeding in being dishevelled, he looked as disordered as she did, but that wasn't what caught her attention. In a previous era of their relationship, as reluctant crewmates, she'd found his face hard to read; a carefully maintained reserve which she couldn't help but respect, since she always placed a more extreme form of that same mask over her own face. Now though, the transparency, the vividness, of the torture embedded in his absorbing eyes hit her like a kick in the gut, just as it had when she had first woken, a reminder of everything she couldn't face. She couldn't help but gasp slightly and was dimly aware of him doing the same thing as her heart started to reach out of her chest towards him. Self-hatred and anger made her stiffen in shock as she realised that she'd missed him even more than she'd suspected. Irrational.

Chakotay froze as he felt her studying him, sensing her indecision and half expecting her to send him right back out of here. He couldn't stop himself from staring at her, their magnetism seemed to have hiked up even further under this strain, their gazes were locked. She looked so…_small_, so frail, pushing herself further back on the biobed, away from him, until her legs were hanging far off the floor. Her eyes had dimmed to grey, from what he could see of them behind the limp hair that hung in front of her face. She looked as if she'd shrunk in a matter of hours; her previously flatting outfit now seemed to hang off her slender frame as she curled in on herself. "Seven…" He tried to begin, then realised he had no idea what to say, even as his heart burst with sentiment. When she remained silent, just continuing to stare at him. His eyes skittishly scanned the room and he discovered they were utterly alone. "Where's the Doctor?" he found himself asking, gesturing jerkily around the empty room as an uneasy sound, somewhere near a laugh, left his throat. "Did you deactivate him again?"

Seven's colourless eyes suddenly darkened to agate, it was as if somehow had cast a black shadow over her sky blue irises. "He had other duties to conduct tonight." She informed him stiffly, "I've realised he doesn't deserve oblivion any more than the rest of the crew." Chakotay heard the hurt rebuke in this and was silenced, reduced to begging her for understanding with his eyes. Seven, however, seemed introverted, her whole body quivering as her chin jerked up. "He…the Doctor…says that the Collective, they've robbed me of the ability to love…" Her head had rolled downwards as she admitted this, but Chakotay saw the sparkle of streaming tears burning down her ghostly face as she snapped her gaze uncompromisingly to his, "Is he right? Is that true?" she choked out pleadingly, utterly lost.

Chakotay's mouth opened, flinching as her words hit him like a brutal slap? Had the _Doctor_ of all people told her that? No, no, she couldn't take _that _lesson from all this…

Seven seemed to take his split second of dumbfounded silence as an affirmative. "Of _course _it is! I am weak…defective…" She forced out through crushing tears, "Why would any _human _want an emotional failsafe for a moment, rather than the weeks I let it stay? No one else would need a hologram substitute for companionship…" An angry, bitter laugh broke through the sobs as her wild gaze met his again, though it was soon taken over by weeping once more, "I am weak enough to have to come back to the one who…took pity on me, because I do not have anyone else…"

Her body folded in on itself and as Chakotay heard her breathing become even more fragmented, he realised now she'd been hyperventilating since he'd entered, he blinked back his own tears and went to her. "Seven, you're having a panic attack." He told her firmly, deciding to break the barriers between them to stand protectively over her, his hand splaying onto her straining back. "Just...just breathe for me, please. Don't think of anything, just concentrate on breathing." As he felt her spine poking into his palm, he was vaguely reminded of a childhood incident when he's accidently knocked a fledgling out of its nest and had cradled the fragile, wounded creature in his hands as it struggled.

A panic attack? Seven considered weakly as pins and needles travelled up her arms and one side of her face was quickly going numb, yes that's probably what it was. Still, the oxygen just refused to enter her constricted lungs. Her gaze was just high enough to see Chakotay's frame start to shudder as his hand began to run large, freeing circles into her back. "The Doctor's _wrong_ Seven." He stated with harsh conviction, "The Borg might have tried to take your humanity, but they've never succeeded Seven, not even when you were put under the stress of being ripped away from them. Think of how much you've changed this crew for the better, helped us. Can you really say that you don't love Icheb, the other Borg children, Naomi and the rest of your friends?" He continued softly, sighing as he felt her breathing begin to steady, her eyes begin to focus as her body edged away from unconsciousness. He pulled her cybernetic hand from her knee, seeing that the strengthened nails had dug in so deeply that she'd drawn blood, and held it to anchor him as he felt his own emotions begin to pour out. "You'll find someone who loves you as deeply and purely as you're deserve, someone good and strong and…selfless. He'll be so much better, more worthy of you than I ever could be…"

He felt her shiver and inadvertently glanced down at her again, he'd been keeping his gaze respectfully over her bowed golden head, just in time to see what he thought was hurt flicker through her glazed eyes at his last words. He gulped painfully, he was imagining things he wanted to see, she couldn't possibly still want… He began to unravel his arms from her, through if he could have he would have hugged her properly, clung to her in their suffering. Seven surprised him by seizing his elbows in an iron grip, refusing to let him step back. Slowly, her head fell forward until it was almost resting on his chest. "Explain." She said hoarsely.

"You'd…you'd let me?" Chakotay asked thickly.

Seven gave a tiny nod as she sighed heavily, a shard of her stoic dignity returning. "You wouldn't be here if you didn't want to."

Chakotay sighed, again caught off guard by her insightfulness. "Thank you." He whispered as he surprised her by kneeling so that they were finally at the same eye-level. "I _never _pitied you Seven, even if you don't believe anything else I say, please believe that." After that resolute start, he found his resolve weakening, but one look at her told him he had to confess it all. "It started just like I told you before; the Captain was worrying over your holodeck use. I did try to dissuade her, but after she'd laid out all of her fears for you, I'll admit I became concerned too. That was when…" He gulped hard, "…when I agreed to check what you were doing." He gave Seven a desperate look as he saw her flinch, "I intended to lie to her, or just glance in, but…but when I saw that baby shower, so like the one we'd just thrown, I wanted to understand why you didn't feel you could be so free with _us_, if I could help you…" He had to guiltily lower his gaze as he forced out the first truly sensitive admission, "And I saw my hologram. I was surprised, curious and flattered…" Seven blushed a little under her drying tears but he made himself ignore her. "So, so I kept watching. I saw up to the end of the first date and then I knew I'd gone too far. God Seven, if I'd known you were in danger…" He trailed off, pushing himself back on subject. "I kept asking myself why I kept watching, when I knew it was wrong, but I slowly came to know when I realised that I was…missing you." He took a deep breath and let his hands lie lightly over hers for a moment, "I was selfish Seven, I put my need to explore my feelings for you above keeping your trust." He murmured, dropping her hands again, "As the two of us really grew closer, as I wanted, I felt trapped by what I'd done. I was falling in love with you and the depth of my betrayal became even more obvious. I couldn't handle it, I was selfish again and hurt you by telling you all this because I wanted you…to forgive me." He closed his eyes as she remained silent, praying for strength as he stood up to leave her. "It's okay Seven, you don't…

A weak sob escaped and as he moved away she buried her face in her hands. "Chakotay, I…" She started tightly before her face began to crumple, "This is just too complex and I'm so…so _tired_…" She exclaimed brokenly.

Chakotay moved forward again to give her hands one last squeeze, a final loving gesture. "I know. I'll leave you to…"

Her hands moved from his fearfully to grasp his wrists. "Don't go." She whispered, releasing him quickly as she registered his shock and pressing a hand to her face which couldn't quite suppress the sound of a powerful sob. "I…I don't want to be alone anymore…"

Chakotay blinked, struggling to see her through the tears building in his eyes as he tried to give her a reassuring smile. "That makes two of us." He admitted softly.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D **


	33. Chapter 33

"That makes two of us." Chakotay's heartfelt admission made Seven lift her eyes to his face once more, searching it for pity, for a hint that the words were a mere concession to her feelings rather than a reflection of his. The painful honesty she saw in the deep dark orbs of his eyes confounded her expectations however and she felt a lump of potent longing and grief build up in her throat again. Under the more obvious, elemental emotions that mirrored her own, regret, confusion and fear; empathy and understanding somehow managed to shine out from behind all that darkness as he looked at her. Witnessing that, clear as day, made her heart thud poignantly. She'd always been drawn to real empathy and true understanding towards her. It was so rare, made the sympathy she was often shown in the light of her 'tragic' life seem shallow and meaningless. As such, it had always reached her more than even affection. At the moment she saw all three in Chakotay's intense gaze. She daren't search deeper, beyond affection, right now, her heart might burst. Seven felt her hands twitch in her lap, tempted to grasp his. In fact, in that moment she desperately wanted to let herself sink into his arms, bury her face into the crook of his neck and just stay there, taking advantage of that sheltering comfort while she tried to come up for air from these waves of emotion that were drowning her. She knew that he'd let her, but that was beside the point. To do so would prolong the poison of this situation if her conflicted mind did eventually decide it would be better to shut him out. She still found herself breathing a sigh of relief when, true to his word, he didn't move away, didn't abandon her to deal with this.

Chakotay registered that relief, and felt one knot in his chest slacken, but another quickly replaced it when Seven didn't respond, again completely introverted. In other circumstances it might've fascinated him; the way so many emotions seemed to burn across her face at once before she stiffened, as if the Collective were giving her a mental command, and her face would be still for a few seconds before one glance at him would make her unravel and the cycle would start again. He'd vowed that, beyond giving his explanation, baring his soul to her in many respects, he wouldn't interfere with what she was going through. Her forgiveness, if he'd earned it, had to be given freely. It was a torturous trial though, another layer of punishment, to just watch her fighting with herself like this. Everything in him wanted to gather her up in his arms, hold the pieces of her he'd wilfully shattered together, then wipe tonight from her memory and his, make it _irrelevant_.

A quaking breath left Seven's throat as she weakly swiped a few strands of her hair out of her face, her lips pressing together until they were grey and bloodless. "I…" She found herself starting to say, although she had no idea how she wished to continue. She winced as she saw the twin feelings of hope and fear flood into Chakotay's familiar features, one brightening his face, the other plunging it into darker shadow. A jolt ran through them both as the reprieve of Sickbay's doors opening reached their senses.

"Seven, how…" The Doctor began, the false ring of his cheerful voice halting abruptly as he saw that not one but two people awaited him within his domain. "Oh." He murmured, a ghost of a smile playing across his lips, relief and a measure of satisfaction revealing themselves in that momentary expression even as his ageless face suddenly appeared a decade older. "I'm sorry for interrupting…"

Seven's vulnerable, withdrawn figure took an 180 degree turn at his voice, showing erect dignity in every fibre of her being as she gazed stoically past both Chakotay and the Doctor. "How are Ensign Kim and Crewman Delaney?" she asked politely, her voice hoarse but barely catching.

The Doctor gave an awkward chuckle as Chakotay gave a start of surprise. "Oh, I managed to patch them up again this time, don't worry. I did warn them to perhaps keep their impromptu dates on the more sedate end of the adrenaline spectrum for at least a few days though, maybe dinner instead of cliff-diving…" His fists clenched at his misstep as both Seven and Chakotay painfully averted their eyes for a split second at the mention of 'dinner'. "You know…" He started slowly as he absorbed the scene, they'd obviously made some much needed progress together, "I need to stay here to file an injury report for the Captain, but this deck's Observation Lounge should be empty at this time of night if you want to keep talking." He suggested softly, studying the shell-shocked, lost faces of the couple knowingly. He regarded Seven fondly as her reserve began to splinter away, shrinking in on herself again as she met Chakotay's equally huge, conflicted eyes. "I think you'll be okay out of here now Seven." He murmured kindly, the only guidance he could fairly give in the right direction, "Just keep the monitor on this time, okay?"

Seven replied with a jerky nod, as if she were a puppet on a string. "Okay." She echoed numbly, immediately starting to slide herself off the biobed, but her shaking knees buckled slightly as she asked her feet to take her weight and Chakotay had to catch her before she slumped to the floor.

Guilt stabbed the Doctor right in the heart of his emotional circuitry. Maybe he was pushing her onto the path of reconciliation too quickly… "I wasn't dismissing you Seven, if you still feel unwell…"

"No." Seven cut him off sharply through gritted teeth, unsettled by the familiar heat Chakotay's saving touch had sent surging through her. Bracing herself against the biobed, her hands clawing around the edge for support, she added in a low tone, "I'll be fine."

The Doctor nodded solemnly, more focused on Chakotay's reaction. The other man's Adam's apple moved convulsively up and down his throat as he watched Seven, staying respectfully away from her but with his arms instinctively held open, again primed to catch the weakened woman if she as much as wavered mid step. The Doctor felt himself relax and let a little more hope in as he observed this attentiveness. They were still in tune with each other somehow, walking in step even as they moved to leave in a broody, uncertain silence. It was a bittersweet moment for him. He was happy to sense that they may well get over this turmoil, but he felt the loss of letting the possibility of Seven's heart go, she'd already given it away, whether they actually resolved their issues or not.

* * *

Chakotay couldn't help but be glad that Deck 3's Observation Lounge was only a few doors away from Sickbay. He'd never had more awkward minutes with Seven of Nine, pregnant with unspoken tensions, not even when she'd been rapt to the Collective's whim and he'd been her avowed adversary. Something had _always_ sparked in the air between them, hatred and distrust initially, unease later, wit and then attraction recently. It was as if something had died, as if they'd both given up in some fundamental way, withdrawn from each other after their confessions. He understood what Seven had meant earlier, when she'd said she was tired, that this was too complex; he too felt drained of everything. He wondered why she'd agreed to talk to him more, the thought that she'd conceded just because the Doctor told her to made him uncomfortable, forcing her wounds to bleed further for his sake was really the last thing he wanted…

"Commander?" He flinched at her use of his rank, although he was relieved to hear that her voice struck a more normal, less strained timbre. He realised why as he turned to meet her gaze, he'd unthinkingly walked past the door to their destination. Under normal circumstances, Seven might've laughed at such an oversight, or at least arched a questioning brow in amusement, but now she was just studying him with an unreadable expression.

"Sorry." He muttered in reply, following her in as the doors slowly slid open. This Observation Lounge was identical to all the others, a panoramic strip of big windows showing off a stretch of Delta Quadrant stars, a big corner sofa pressed against the main window, a couple of tables and some smaller chairs sprinkled around to take advantage of the four food replicators in the room. There was a one such lounge on each deck, designed to be a quiet space for crewmembers to take duty breaks when they didn't have time to return to their quarters or visit the Mess Hall. The Doctor had been right, since the night shift was in full swing and Deck 3 was never a hive of activity anyway, the room was empty. A few strips of mood lighting and the glow of the stars were the only sources of light for the room and neither he nor Seven made move to alter it as they entered, the shadowy, silent atmosphere suited their moods. Seven's leaden frame only regained some of its characteristic grace as she sank into the corner of the expansive sofa, her shoes slipping off her feet as she neatly snapped her legs under her, her arms coiling tight around her slim waist as she stared out at the nameless stars rather than at him. Chakotay rubbed his eyes tiredly, his heart clenching as he took in her defensive posture and was again struck by her beauty. The starlight, to his eyes at least, made her skin glimmer like polished alabaster. Paired with the silver of her implants and the golden sheen of her flowing hair it made her look even more ethereal. He made a simple gesture towards the replicator, "Do you want something to drink?" Seeing the violet shadows under her eyes tempted him to just replicate her espresso and push it on her, she looked in need of the caffeine boost, but he knew that she detested coffee just as devoutly as the Captain worshipped at its altar.

Seven straightened guiltily at the kindness in his voice, as ever there wasn't a hint of a patronising note in his way of speaking to her. It shouldn't be like this, tonight should've driven them apart, driven him away from her, but here he was asking about her beverage preferences. She wasn't even sure why she'd agreed to keep talking, she wasn't sure she _could _say anymore, but she had the distinct feeling that if she didn't try to get it off her chest now she'd be weighed down with it forever, that they may never speak like this again. She found herself training her gaze on the implants snaking up her arm, distracting herself with the odd little details, as she answered, "Hot chocolate please." The words were barely audible, but she knew he'd heard her when he started slightly in surprise. Before, she knew, he would've thrown her a questioning smirk at that, or gone one better and flashed her that mesmerising smile, just for the sake of knowing why she'd said such a thing, but now he merely cleared his throat, his back still to her. With a small sigh, Seven answered his unspoken question, "Naomi Wildman introduced me to it, it's an occasional treat when I babysit her."

Chakotay smiled at the thought, his mood lifting at the endearing image her words conjured in his mind. "Two hot chocolates." He ordered swiftly, snatching up the two mugs as soon as they appeared. "This is one of the delicacies my ancestors introduced to the world." He told her, trying to keep the tone light, but falling short as he carefully handed her the mug so that their fingers didn't touch. "I don't think I've drunk any of this since the last time my Mom kept me home from school." He murmured distractedly to himself.

Seven suddenly wanted to know more of that story, to ask him to delve deeper into the memory, but the words wouldn't come. Instead she took a long slip of the bittersweet, tart liquid, letting the heat and sugar infuse a little energy into her sapped reserves. She forced herself to savour it, to take her time, as she watched Chakotay over the rim of the mug. He hadn't sat down, in fact he looked like he would've been more comfortable pacing as he hovered in the middle of the room, his own mug clutched tight in hand but untouched. "What are we supposed to do now?" she asked him abruptly, grimacing as her voice cracked with despair. When he didn't supply an answer, she offered one. "Should we…could we…" She swallowed, "…re-establish our professional boundaries?"

The entirety of Chakotay's imposing, powerful figure shuddered, his healthy, tanned face turning an ashen shade of grey as he stared at her as if she'd just shot him on high stun. "What, like going back to being Crewman and Commander?" he forced out. For the first time that night Seven heard not only incredulity but bitterness as well as anger and hurt in his deep voice. Something passionate flared in his eyes but then he seemed to rein himself in as his whole body slumped. "Is…Is that what you want?" he asked seriously.

Seven began to blink rapidly, turning away from him as she felt tears form. "I couldn't do that before, after the hologram…" She admitted faintly, self-hatred edging back into her voice, "My inability to let go of…certain feelings regarding is the root of this whole situation…"

Chakotay suddenly moved from where he stood to perch on the other end of the sofa, turning to meet her gaze intensely as he ran a stressed hand through his hair, "Seven, no one ever asked you to let go of any feelings, that was that damned failsafe. I've spent all night begging you _not_ to dismiss your feelings for me, whatever I've done…"

Seven's heavy lids blinked closed, her face lacquered with tears as she set her jaw. "If I hadn't indulged in those fantasies I would still be functional now and you would be ignorant of me!" she choked out, "If I hadn't piqued your pity or curiosity or whatever it was when you watched me you wouldn't…"

Chakotay grasped her hands, "Seven, I told you it wasn't pity. I tried to explain my stupid actions to you before and I know it doesn't make sense because you wouldn't think of doing that to someone, but you need to realise that I didn't fall for the woman in the holodecks, but for you as you are right now. I don't think of the dates with the hologram when I think of you, I think of us spending an hour laughing as we teased Neelix, our time on Ledosia, our dance at the party…" Desperately, he took the chance of grasping her hands in his, "I fell in love with you long after the holo-programme was deleted, I stopped caring about that beyond how it would affect you if you found out…"

Seven stared at him uncomprehendingly, although he could see that, this time, his declaration of love had sunk in. "How can you not care?" she whispered, "I simulated you, my commanding officer, neglecting my work, just because…because I was lonely and socially dysfunctional. I indulged in vanity and self-deception by erasing my implants!" she cried out in bottled up frustration, "And even after all that, I still kept an emotional suppressant in place because I was too weak-willed to face reality…" Her voice broke again, "How can all that make me less than repulsive to you?"

Chakotay had to remind himself to breathe after hearing this, his heart felt like it was shattering. Yes, she blamed him partially, her self-esteem had been destroyed by what he'd done, but the vast majority of her distraught rage was directed at herself. "Seven, you didn't do anything wrong, whatever that failsafe and my actions have made you feel. You were just exploring things the Collective denied you before, that this crew have denied you in a lot of ways. I wasn't offended by you choosing me, no man would be I promise you." As she bowed her head in denial, he allowed himself to cup her face in both hands, "As for being lonely, that just makes you human, like me, like all of us. You've helped me with that, more than you know." He gave her an encouraging look as she searched his face, his finger brushing the implant under her ear as he swallowed back a frustrated cry, "You could never be _repulsive_ Seven, you're a beautiful woman and your heart is pure. You've never purposefully hurt anyone as an individual…" His lips twisted bitterly, "There are so few people in this universe that's true of, if you only knew how much pain I've caused those around me over the years you'd turn your back on me and never look back…"

"No." Seven interrupted softly, moving her face out of her grip to stare him down. "You hurt me…" She confided seriously, taking several deep breaths as her gaze lowered, "…but I still…I still love you."

There was enough genuine fear, the threat of rejection still stalked her mind, scarred into her face as she whispered that to strike Chakotay complete speechless and it was all he could do to lean forward and take her tenderly into her arms, going with her as she slumped to lie down on the sofa with a breathless sob. She pressed herself tight between the sofa and the warmth of his body, her head coming to rest tentatively on his shoulder as he brought his legs up to form a protective barrier for her. Gingerly, his arm went around her still shaking frame, though the tears she shed were stubbornly silent. He bent his head to brush his lips on her crown of hair, soon tilting her face up to his so he could place a gentle, almost chaste, kiss on her forehead. "We're going to be okay Seven, we'll be fine now…" He whispered to her thickly, as soothingly as he could given how overcome he was.

Seven didn't verbally respond, instead shifting to lay her head squarely on his chest as she nodded, able to feel his answering unshed sob of relief and gratitude as she did so.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D **


	34. Chapter 34

**A/n: I apologise about the lack of updates, with visiting family and puppy-sitting my Easter holidays haven't left as much time for writing as I'd hoped!**

Chakotay's body bristled with alertness as his bleary eyes, clouded with sleep though they were, recognised that he wasn't in his quarters. The next thing his wary senses registered however let him relax, the soft but steady rhythm of breathing, and then the fear numbing, warm weight of someone else's body against his. As his eyes adjusted enough to catch the gleam of golden hair which was reflecting even the faint light managing to reach this corner of the room from the anaemic mood lighting, memories, both agonising and euphoric, flooded his mind, heralded with a heavy sigh. He immediately stiffened, frightened to shatter this serene moment in all its simplicity, but Seven didn't stir, her breathing almost eerily calm in comparison with his own. He allowed his shoulders to flex awkwardly after a few long seconds, arching his neck to ease the crick that had almost certainly irked him away from sleep. A smile drifted across his face as he then shifted his head downwards to study the woman curled into him so completely that every contour of their radically different bodies met seamlessly, but as his gaze swept intently over her features his heart clenched with fresh concern. She was in a state of unconsciousness almost beyond what he could consider regular sleep; it was as if her body had forced her mind to surrender out of sheer exhaustion. He'd seen it before, in the faces of refugees from the Demilitarised Zone, so sapped in body and spirit that they'd crumpled into any quiet corner and given in to sleep even as the land itself seemed to have died around them, sodden with gunfire.

It was strange to put Seven's state of mind level with that, but the thought that she'd been within a knife's edge of death the night before, and had then reached out to confront him, the one that had inflicted the wound, within hours of it almost killing her put a lot of things in perspective. She'd been pushed well beyond her limit of physical, as well as emotional, endurance. He'd witnessed that last night. It wasn't that he didn't believe the confession she'd given him, knew it was as true as the profession of love he'd pressed on her, but he also knew that she may well retract it in the light of day, if her engrained Borg restraint kicked back in to keep the uncertainty at bay. As much as the crew tended to discredit the strict code of the Collective as a bad influence, Chakotay recognised it for what it was, a coping mechanism for someone who'd had more traumatic life experiences than happy ones. Their relationship had been a heady mixture of the two so far; he had to hope that the latter outweighed the former if their love was to survive any more barriers.

He swallowed hard, tenderly guiding the ticklish strands of her loose hair out of her face before letting glide through his shaking fingers. Trust was important now, he couldn't lose that just because of guilt, because part of him didn't _want_ to be forgiven, that he didn't deserve that from her.

The stubborn, unrelenting buzz of the shift change alert, which resounded through all of Voyager's public spaces to ensure that everyone scheduled for duty couldn't plausibly claim they'd forgotten, released him from the maze of his convoluted, unsubstantiated worries. The sound's effect on Seven was more dramatic, her purple lidded eyes abruptly shot open with a startled gasp and she tried to sit up so rapidly that confusion left her dazed and flailing against Chakotay's strong arms that sped out to steady her. "What…What's wron…" She started to mumble, her wide, unfocused gaze leaving her blue eyes mirroring the vacancy of stained glass.

"It's just the duty shift bell." Chakotay murmured reassuringly, rubbing her back as she finally managed to get out of her contorted position around him and sit up. "I guess we stayed here a little longer than we intended to." He tried to smile at her then, his voice soft and light.

"I don't think I _intended_ any of this." Seven muttered brokenly to herself as she swung her legs, riddled with pins and needles, to the floor and pressed the cool metal of her left hand against her aching head. She felt Chakotay's hand stop suddenly on her back, and although he tried to cover the slip she saw the flinch her words sent across his face. "I didn't mean…" She began, the rest of the sentence dying on her lips as she took in his expression. A hint of pained desperation she'd seen on his face so much in the past few hours still lined his brow, shadowing the dark eyes that were still haunted by guilt. The vulnerability that was in sync with her own was still there, making her heart squeeze with a feeling she couldn't pinpoint as either part of her own emotional tumult or as empathy for his. .

"I know what you meant Seven." He replied in a kind reprieve, though he sighed as he spoke, propping his back against the arm of the couch as he too tried to shake off the vestiges of sleep.

Seven nodded, grateful for the confirmation, her gaze drifting down to his visibly dishevelled clothes as she did so. Foggy recollections of her tears soaking into that shirt before sleep had claimed her returned and she flushed. She hadn't been lying on him like that all night surely? She didn't even need to mentally answer the question, she remembered the sound of his heartbeat beneath her ear and his murmurings of reassurance restoring an emotional calm she'd begun to believe at that point would never return. Her blush deepened as she tugged agitatedly at the collar of her sweater, it had slipped until not only the mutilation of her right shoulder was visible but also the slender strip of her bra strap. "I'm sorry that I…trapped you in such an uncomfortable position." She mumbled hurriedly, turning away from him as she continued to right her clothes.

Chakotay felt something close to relief upon seeing her shyness. He knew how to handle that and had always found it somewhat endearing, though right now he wanted to see her have some more confidence in him. "Don't be." To Seven's ears, his tone was firm enough to remind her of an order and she relaxed a little. "Actually, I haven't slept that well in a while." He admitted quietly, giving her a cautious smile.

Seven couldn't quite hold his gaze, instead taking a sudden and intense interest in a small hole in her tights at the knee. "Yes." She replied hastily. Chakotay suspected this was agreement as to the peace they'd felt, rather than a mere acknowledgement of what he'd said, but he couldn't be sure. "It is 0605 hours, I should be preparing for my shift in Astrometrics…"

Chakotay gave a soft groan that made her jump slightly as she watched him run a strained hand through his hair with concern. "Well, I was short-sighted enough yesterday to say I'd do the morning Bridge shift. That was before…" He trailed off awkwardly, "Anyway, I guess I'll be late." He concluded with a shrug.

Seven stared at him, looking so shocked by his nonchalance that it was verging on comical. "I will not delay you any longer…" She stuttered out, immediately moving to stand up but stumbling when she was caught off guard by her shoeless feet. She shivered as Chakotay caught her once again and pulled her back onto the stability of the couch, colouring himself when she narrowly avoided falling onto his lap.

"I'm delaying myself, the Bridge will wait." He told her sharply, "You're too worn out to be doing anything other than resting Seven."

Seven breathed an exasperated sigh, "I may be…tired..." She conceded reluctantly, "…but that doesn't mean I can avoid my duties forever, that failed once before." She gave him a pointed look and Chakotay knew she was referring to the near miss with the minefield that had led to the deletion of her holodeck programme and, in a way, had accelerated this whole development between them. "I haven't been 'pulling my weight' lately. I don't want to rely on Icheb to do so much; he's still so young…"

Seeing that he'd unburied another of her worries, Chakotay decided to give in on this one. "Alright." He conceded, gently laying an arm across her quaking shoulders as she curled in on herself fretfully. "You know that I can rearrange your duty shifts for a few days…" He started to tentatively remind her.

"No." Seven cut him off forcefully, her piercing gaze unwaveringly on his for the first time that morning. "I do not want our…" She gulped audibly, "…relationship to affect our respective duties." She smiled slightly to herself in relief as Chakotay clasped his hand around hers and squeezed it before she'd even finished the sentence.

"I can respect that." He assured her softly, bringing their laced hands to rest on his knee and then tracing circles on the back of her hand with his thumb. "But, just for today, you could call in some backup. The Captain had you give Ensigns Carter and Licalsi Astrometrics training for a reason…" Seven arched both eyebrows at him and Chakotay belatedly remembered that the 'voluntary' training had been inordinately stressful for all three involved, to the point where he'd been quietly rearranging shifts so that the aforementioned Carter and Licalsi never needed to use that Astrometrics training. Not that the Captain had been let into that particular policy loop. "Sorry, I'd forgotten how…disruptive that was." He said with a low chuckle.

Seven's eyes narrowed at the memory. "Carter almost directed us backwards rather than towards the Alpha Quadrant when I left her alone. Licalsi spilled _coffee _on my control panel…"

Chakotay lifted his hands in the air defensively. "Okay, I won't bring that idea up again." He declared, smiling as he watched her face soften, a change that made the tired strain in her eyes all the more obvious. "You could ask Harry for a favour, he helped you build the lab…"

Seven edged forward on the couch, shoving her hair behind her shoulders as it fought to float in front of her eyes. "I do not require favours from Ensign Kim." Blood tinged her cheeks as the words came out more arch and teasing than she intended, and the way that Chakotay's eyes widened for a moment, his jaw locking, and she realised that she'd made a mild double-entendre.

Chakotay confirmed her suspicion by giving her a slightly lopsided grin. The expression as she'd been unintentionally suggestive had somehow managed to be utterly guileless and sweetly coquettish at the same time. "God, I hope not." He responded huskily, unable to keep a note of jealousy from his voice.

Seven allowed a small smile to gingerly grace her lips in response. "Good." She whispered, resting her elbows on her knees thoughtfully. "I will ask the Doctor for permission."

Chakotay exhaled, "Thanks honey."

Seven felt her blush extend up from her cheeks right up to the tips of her ears as she heard the term of endearment but distracted herself by activating her comm. badge, "Doctor, I apologise for not returning to Sickbay, it was remiss of me."

"I knew where you were Seven; you're still wearing your monitor." The Doctor replied, "I thought better of disturbing your sleep." He took a long pause, "Are you and the Commander…feeling better?"

Seven pursed her lips apprehensively and glanced at Chakotay, who regarded her pensively as he awaited her answer. "I believe so." She said slowly, her voice hitched as she tried to continue, "I…I contacted you to ask if I am fit for duty."

"Well…" The Doctor started reluctantly, "I'd like you to regenerate, but I think a dose of normality would do you good so I'm willing to compromise. If you start a three hour cycle now, I'm willing to release you for duty as long as you complete a full 12 hour tonight for good measure. In the meantime, consider yourself a convalescent."

"Understood." Seven replied crisply, clicking her comm. badge off as she felt Chakotay's gaze on her.

"You know…" He began stiltedly, cringing as he became aware of just how awkward suggesting a date was when, in many fundamental ways, the seriousness of their relationship had gone far beyond the set formula for the first few dates. "We could still do something together today. How about…" He halted, doubting himself. After the turmoil of last night, to suggest dinner wasn't advisable. "…lunch?" He finally finished, adding, to make her comfortable, "We could have it in the Cargo Bay, to keep the Doctor happy?"

Seven gave him a bemused frown. "You'd…You'd be comfortable in the Cargo Bay with me?" she asked disbelievingly.

Chakotay made sure to look her right in the face. "Why wouldn't I be?" he asked with gentle honestly.

Seven found herself blinking rapidly. "Okay." She whispered, "I'd like to have lunch with you."

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D**


	35. Chapter 35

**A/n: Thanks so much to NikkiB1973 for updating her C/7 fic 'Shining Star' with my favourite chapter yet. Beta reading and enjoying it really inspired me to finish this. :)**

Seven of Nine was glad to be back in Astrometrics. The Doctor had been correct, a dose of normality, however relative, was helping her. She'd completed the prescribed three hour regeneration cycle, and it had no doubt restored her physical reserves somewhat, she could finally walking without stumbling again, and stand still without support, but returning to her post in Astrometrics was the action that had given her some emotional equilibrium. Just letting her gaze follow a continuous sweep over the menagerie of consoles, monitors and devices she'd built into the lab over the years to efficiently organise and report the torrents of information that was fed into the room every minute was reassuring, even satisfying, to her. Just because she'd recently realised that she couldn't confine her emotional state to that alone, that as safe as her work was for her to give herself over to it wouldn't fulfil her forever, didn't mean she didn't still draw comfort from being here. For now, allowing herself to fall back into the routine her entanglement with Chakotay had so disrupted provided her with space to unknot her confusion, force herself to focus to on logic of data and formulae rather than the unknown of their fast approaching lunch…

She sighed then, perhaps work wasn't as an effective distraction as she'd hoped, at least when everything was so peaceful. Closing her eyes for a moment, she rotated her tense shoulders in their sockets. Her uniform, stiff with newness, was almost as reluctant to give as her taut muscles. The chirp of a sensor alert made her eyes shoot open again as she tried to recall which sensor she'd attached that, almost cheery, sound to. Walking hurriedly over to the relevant console, she felt an unexpected smile of delight tug at her lips as she read details of the discovery. "Computer, put a visual of asteroid belt 34678 on screen, sector 531 East." She ordered smoothly, nodding to herself as her unspoken conclusions began to reel down the screen as scan data on either side of the image of the asteroid belt. Her cautious smile unconsciously widened, it was a rare event for her to deliver good news. "Seven of Nine to the Bridge." She called down her comm. badge.

"Yes Seven?" Chakotay, obviously still on his Bridge shift, answered. His voice was a mixture of eagerness and apprehension; Seven couldn't help but wonder what their crewmates on the Bridge were making of his reaction, even as it made her own cheeks warm.

"Chak…" She cringed at the near slip, "_Commander_, you may wish to contact Mr Neelix and tell him to report to Astrometrics. I believe that the long range sensors have picked up a sizeable Talaxian settlement, it may be of interest to him."

She could sense that he was grinning, could hear the happy anticipation in his even tones, as he replied with a light chuckle, "That _may _be an understatement, I think it'll be of interest to us all, but especially Neelix. I'll let him know."

Seven was irritated at herself as she felt her mood contrarily dip a little as he clicked comm. line back off. She should be appreciative of his efforts to maintain professionalism, she'd asked nothing less of him mere hours before after all. Shaking off those disconcerting thoughts, she turned decidedly back towards the main console, determined to satisfy Neelix's curiosity as best as she could when he undoubtedly arrived.

That arrival came much faster than even she had anticipated as within minutes she heard the soft swoosh of the doors opening directly behind her. "Mr Nee…" She started to greet the Talaxian, surprise stopping her as she saw that not only the Morale Officer but also the Captain had walked into her lab. "Captain."

Janeway gracefully ignored her surprise, her eyes already locked on the image on the monitor beyond Seven's head. "Well, it seems the programming you put in place to register Talaxian lifesigns has worked like a charm Seven!" she declared approvingly.

Seven frowned slightly. She'd never heard of a 'charm', a magical trinket by definition, actually working. Soon though, she dismissed the irrelevant idiom. "It would appear so Captain." She responded carefully, looking past Janeway to meet Neelix's amber gaze. The man was staring at the asteroid field with a wistful awe that made her heart thump with empathy. She hoped the scans were right, she knew what it was like to be alone in the universe and since the Talaxian people were now so fragmented and dispersed around the Quadrant, she realised that Neelix must often share that lonely, singular feeling.

"How many are there?" He finally asked, his normally effusive voice heavy with emotion.

"Approximately 900." Seven answered softly.

"Are they on a ship?" The Captain asked thoughtfully, studying the image on the monitor intently. All she could see were a few massive hunks of rock, as intimidating as they were inhospitable, but if the row after row of Borg numerical code flowing down the screen was anything to go by then this asteroid belt was anything but average. It often irked her how at sea she felt in Astrometrics at times like this, she prided herself on having a working knowledge of every part of her ship, no matter how much she trusted the specialists below her. However, Astrometrics was one place that rule didn't stretch to, with the vast majority of the data presented in the almost purely mathematical Borg script she'd rather not wrap her head around. Thus, the rest of the crew were almost wholly dependent on Seven and Icheb to interpret, let alone control, the lab's higher functions. She suspected that Seven had designed it that way not only for efficiency but for her own security, a barter chip. The former drone had been so distrustful those first few months on board after all. Thankfully, it was different now, Seven was dependable, her behaviour generally predictable. However, it still would've been handy if she could have convinced her to loosen her grip on Astrometrics back then.

Seven shook her head firmly, earning shocked stares from both visitors. "No. According to these scans there is a settlement on the largest of the asteroids. It appears to be a mining colony on some level."

"That would make sense." Neelix mused, "There were always miners on Talax, those skills wouldn't die out if they found the right place." He stared at the looming, blackened rocks again in disbelief, "But why would they live _there _when there are plenty of M class planets in this system?"

"I'm sure they had their reasons." Janeway answered diplomatically with a questioning glance at Seven.

Probably because the dominant power in this system wouldn't allow them to settle elsewhere, Seven added silently, but, looking at Neelix's serious face, she knew that didn't need to be said. "The asteroid actually has a lower M class atmosphere and is rich in minerals if not plant life. It may be perfectly suited to their wants."

Janeway smiled at Neelix, giving his shoulder an empathic squeeze. "I think they'd still appreciate a visit, don't you think Mr Neelix? I've never met a Talaxian who didn't prove a firm friend to this crew."

Neelix's eyes welled for a moment before he blinked. "Thank you Captain." He murmured sincerely.

"Of course." Janeway assured him warmly, "I'll go and inform Tom of the change of course." She turned to Seven questioningly just as she moved back towards the door. "How long will it be until we're within hailing range?"

"Three hours at our current velocity Captain." Seven replied promptly.

Janeway flashed a widening grin at Neelix encouragingly, "I'll ask Lieutenant Paris to kick it up a notch."

Neelix breathed a sigh as the Captain left, one Seven found herself echoing as she watched his attention fixate on the asteroid. There was a longing on his face, hope brightening one side and grief haunting the other, that she'd seen on all the crew's faces with increasing frequency, ever since the tenuous comm. line to Alpha Quadrant had opened. They were seeing a glimpse of home, just as Neelix was now, but that vision reinforced just how far from home they all were. Neelix's family were all dead, these Talaxians would still be strangers in all likelihood. This homesickness she witnessed always clarified that she had no such link to the Alpha Quadrant, to any place or anyone except the Collective. The day Voyager completed its journey, if she lived to see it, would be a uniquely difficult one for her. The thought was disloyal to the crew, contrary to their goals, but it was painfully true none the less.

Neelix's voice, lower than normal but still open and friendly, cut through these thoughts clouding her mind, "Thank you for finding this Seven."

Seven lowered her eyes from his emphatic ones, uncomfortable with his gratitude given the selfish thoughts she'd just been harbouring. "I believe the focus of the scan was Ensign Kim's idea, hence the unusually…lively sound of the alert." She informed him quickly.

Neelix smiled at her knowingly, "I'll need to thank Harry too then, but you're the one who acted on it today, I'm grateful for that." When Seven didn't reply, her discomfiture growing, he moved closer to her, his spotted head tilting enquiringly, "How did your dinner with a certain First Officer go last night?"

Seven stiffened, her face flushing in response to the unanticipated assault. "How do you…"

"I'm the one who gave him the refresher course on the tenderloin, remember?" Neelix reminded her, his orange eyes sparkling until they almost seemed golden. "He didn't tell me who it was for." He assured her hurriedly, thinking he may just have landed the lovesick Commander in hot water, "But I've developed a…sense for these things over the years." He tapped his nose playfully, the action having the desired effect as Seven relaxed. "I suppose this is a little outside my brief as Morale Officer, but how did it go?"

The question numbed Seven's mind for a moment, all the turmoil and exhaustion of the night before flooding back. "It included some…unexpected developments." She eventually answered stiltedly, an odd panic running through her when she saw concern flickering over Neelix's honest face. "We're…we're going to have lunch today…" She explained, unsure why she was clarifying the status for him.

Relief and delight lit Neelix's face. "I'm pleased to hear it Seven!" he told her eagerly, "Do you want me to prepare something special in the Mess Hall for the two of you?"

Seven shook her head, beginning to feel overwhelmed again. "No, we made other arrangements." She said quickly, regretting the answer when she realised how little idea she had of what to do to make the Cargo Bay comfortable, no matter how much Chakotay had dismissed such considerations. "_I'm _supposed to be making the arrangements…" She confided weakly.

Neelix grasped the problem immediately, but didn't make himself _too _obvious. He'd never felt that it was right to be patronising with Seven, he'd always found her predicaments and confusions with the Voyager culture completely understandable considering her background. "I've always enjoyed a picnic lunch myself." He told her, "Not too fussy, fun and relaxed. I'd take a picnic before a sit down meal any day, but then I'd rather eat any way than do almost anything else!" he laughed to himself.

Seven felt her whole body sag with relief. "A picnic sounds very feasible." She agreed thoughtfully.

"For certain." Neelix pressed confidently, "You know, you don't have to stay here with me. I can call you back if I have anymore questions, since it's almost lunch time already."

"Of course I would return." Seven instantly assured him, "But I would appreciate…"

Neelix gave her left hand, still resting on the console controls, a fond pat. "I know." He smiled at him coaxingly when she still seemed uncertain, "Feel free to go to the galley to make some things if you have time." He added gently. Seven of Nine was one of the very few people he trusted enough to give a free rein in his beloved kitchen, after using it she tended to have it in better order than he'd left it in!

Seven returned the smile as best she could, knowing full well what he was doing and, for once, allowing herself to accept the kindness without any resistance. "Thank you Neelix."

* * *

Chakotay somehow managed to walk the threshold of Cargo Bay 2 without breaking his stride, but as soon as he reached that make or break point where the huge doors would open if he took another step his knees began to quake, his lungs refusing to fill with air, he had to stop. If he messed it up this time… No, a stronger voice suddenly drowned out the fear for the first time all day, you'll mess this up if she's waiting for you behind that door and you never go in! That thought brought a deep, steadying breath into his chest and he pushed his foot forward.

He held that breath in until the Cargo Bay's hulking doors had closed firmly behind him. His bravery wasn't immediately rewarded however, there was no sign of Seven. The Cargo Bay was even more eerie without her unaffected presence. Although the cavernous space was lit as normal, the shadows cast out from the multitude of storage containers seemed to lengthen as he watched them, taking on a green tinge from the luminous, lurking glow emanating from the row of sleeping alcoves. The room's Borg identity, added to his previous ideas of it as Seven's cage, made him shiver. She wouldn't stand him up, what if something else had gone wrong with her cortical node? Was she collapsed in here somewhere?

Propelled forward by his need to find her, he strode further into the room, his stance buckled over with worry. Within seconds though, he'd rounded a tall stack of round barrels and found Seven, kneeling on her Ventu blanket, which was already held down by a bulging basket and several plates of food, absorbed in trying to cut a small cake into even slices. He choked back a dazed laugh of relief at his own absurdity as he took in the scene, of course she was here!

It was a scene that charmed him to point where he almost didn't want to make her aware of him. Only Seven would set something out like this so strategically, mimicking a picture book picnic with such detail that he was left amazed. His attention was really taken by watching her bowed head as she tried to smooth the blanket out with one hand and distractedly swiping a few wayward strands of hair behind her ear with the other. "Wow…"

Seven jerked her head up, blood rushing into her face as she was met with his awestruck expression. Shakily, she teetered further back onto her knees, gesturing awkwardly at the arrangement in front of her. "It's a picnic." She explained, cringing as she stared at the barrels that had blocked the door from her line of sight and left her oblivious to his arrival. "I…I thought this position might prove more discreet, but perhaps I misjudged…" She trailed off when he still didn't speak, frowning uncertainly down at the picnic she'd spent almost an hour preparing. Perhaps she'd made some glaring error with it. Picnics were, as Neelix had said, superficially simple, but she'd learned that simplicity in the human sense was still complex for someone like her, uninitiated into cultural norms. Hopefully he'd forgive her if he ate, she'd realised that feeding humans, particularly men, made the memory of most social faux pas fade, it was one of the reasons she was glad of her culinary skills.

"No, you didn't misjudge…" Chakotay told her, all in one breath, still staring at the spread below him in disbelief. "I'm just surprised, I wasn't expecting so much. Did you make all this?" He peered at her intently, searching her face worriedly for signs of the morning's over-exhaustion.

"Some of it is replicated." Seven replied regretfully, "Not all of the ingredients were available in Hydroponics, but I prepared it all and its completely vegetarian." She paused nervously, starting to realise that she had likely 'overdone' it. Trying too hard was off-putting. "If it's too elaborate, I can…"

Chakotay pointedly stood on the blanket. "Don't touch a thing." He told her firmly, crouching down to her level as the pressure of anxiety lifted away from him and he felt a smile split his face wide. "This…this is absolute perfection." He murmured in a low, private tone, his awe still evident.

Seven found herself returning the smile, her blush clinging stubbornly to her cheeks as she absorbed his compliment, which seemed tailored to her. "Good." She replied, her breath catching as he slowly knelt to join her on the blanket, still grinning from ear to ear, his disarmingly warm gaze still locked on her face. He was so handsome…

"Better for me." Chakotay commented with a chuckle, "This is already the best picnic I've been to."

"This is my first picnic." Seven admitted, though she didn't feel as embarrassed to say so as she generally did about her lack of experiences. This just felt special. "I'm enjoying it so far." She added in a lighter tone, tentatively moving to sit with her legs crossed on the blanket.

As if on cue, as he shifted to ape her position, Chakotay heard as well as felt his stomach growl with hunger. He tried to drown the sound out by awkwardly clearing his throat, but one glance at Seven, who was loyally, but obviously, trying to stifle a laugh, told him his gut was still audible. "Well, apparently I'm ready to enjoy this food." He joked to diffuse the moment, reaching for a plate. "I'm starving, I haven't eaten since…" He trailed off as he remembered their aborted dinner from the night before, unsure if he should refer to it even casually.

Seven's eyes had indeed lowered uncertainly. "I thought that may be the case." She responded bravely after a long pause, picking up the salad bowl and offering him the tongs, which he took gratefully. Both of them jumped a little as their fingers unintentionally met. "I had a nutritional supplement before reporting to Astrometrics, but I am still glad of this lunch."

Chakotay nodded encouragingly, glad of the conversation, thin and stilted as it was. Missing their easy banter, he grasped hold of the mention of Astrometrics as a topic. "So, how did Neelix take the news of the Talaxian settlement you found?"

A tired smile tinged with an emotion he couldn't read passed over Seven's face, "I doubt the Talaxian ever believed themselves lost." She remarked wryly.

Chakotay chuckled, although he sensed the comment was a deflection. "No, I guess not." He agreed, "But really, how was he?"

Seven considered him for a moment, as if debating her reply. "Happy, of course, but…sad also. I suppose it reminds him that the Talaxian people are truly nomadic now, that they're vulnerable."

Chakotay sighed, "You're probably right, some things can bring back painful memories as well as give back old happiness." He watched her carefully, deciding to push her a little, "I'm sure he'd appreciate your concern Seven."

"Perhaps." Seven conceded softly, "I doubt it would be of significant help though."

Chakotay felt his heart tighten fearfully as she hit this pessimistic note, the concerns he'd had about the mental state he'd left her in resurfacing. Desperately, he scanned the room for another topic for them to cling to. As he swallowed a, heavenly, mouthful of his heaving plate of food and his eyes fell on the familiar stack of Borg spare parts an idea struck him like a bolt from the blue. "I know what would go great with this meal." He informed Seven enthusiastically as he scrambled back to his feet.

Seven's brow furrowed in amused bemusement as she watched his expression become increasingly gleeful. "What exactly?"

"My last bottle of Antarian cider…" Chakotay explained as he began to dive among the spare parts, grinning triumphantly as he plunged his hand into a particular barrel and pulled out a dusty but still unopened bottle. "Icheb didn't let on…"

"Icheb?" Seven asked, dumbfounded, before suspicion dawned on her incredulous face. "Explain Chakotay."

Chakotay spun around hurriedly as her tone brought the uncomfortable realisation that to Seven, Icheb's guardian, using a teenager to help hide his alcohol stash wouldn't exactly land him in her good books. "I wanted to hide my last bottles from Neelix, they're too good to be splashed into one of his concoctions, I decided he'd never think to look down here. Icheb saw what I as doing and suggested that it hide it among the Borg spare parts, since they creep Neelix out." He explained, spluttering, "I didn't encourage him to drink it, I promise! He's underage and I don't think…"

"I should hope not." Seven interrupted, having gracefully risen from the blanket and joined him by the spare parts while he was busy tying himself in knots. She swiftly took the bottle from him, assessing the contents, "It appears unopened, Icheb must've followed his own conscience on the matter."

Chakotay was left almost dizzy with relief. "Seven, I…" He started, stopped as he took in Seven's expression. A devilish glint glittered in her eyes and her frame was shaking with barely suppressed laughter. "Thankfully for me." He finished lamely. That was too much for Seven and a surprisingly light, free laugh began to ring out from her lips, soon joined by his own. "Okay, I asked for that one." He conceded as they finally got their breath back.

"Yes, you did." Seven agreed, still smiling, "Though obviously I need to catalogue my collection of spare parts more regularly. Who knows how many secretive people Icheb gave the same advice to?"

"Well, I'm not helping you look through it right now. This conversation has left me in need of a drink." Chakotay told her through more snorts of laughter, moving swiftly back towards their picnic.

Seven's face constricted with uncertainty as she saw him about to open the bottle. "Perhaps you should not waste it not me. The Doctor has concluded that I have a very low tolerance for synthehol…"

"Nothing could be wasted on you." Chakotay interrupted her resolutely, "As for your tolerance, I wouldn't push anything on you, but this isn't replicated, it has a lot fewer chemicals that synthehol. You'll probably be fine with half a glass or so."

Seven eyed the bottle uneasily, then nodded as the logic of his gentle offer sunk in. "Testing that theory would be acceptable." She said tentatively, kneeling on the blanket again to produce two glasses as he opened the bottle.

"I'd stop you before you got tipsy." Chakotay assured her understandingly as he half-filled her small glass and handed it to her before filling his own. "Cheers."

"Cheers." Seven murmured, echoing his warm tone as well as the word. Their glasses gave a companionable clink before she allowed herself a cautious sip of the pale golden liquid, immediately relishing its smooth, fruity taste, both sweet and bracingly tart. "You were wise not to relinquish it to Neelix." She commented approvingly.

"Right." Chakotay responded with an easy smile that faltered slightly as she blushed under his gaze. He made his eyes look around him for a moment to take the heat off her nerves and found himself looking around the Cargo Bay with fresh eyes. This corner of it at least, shielded from the door, struck him as a little more personalised, with the Ventu blanket spread lovingly under them. Seeing a kadiskot board, waiting for Naomi to interrupt Seven's work and ask to play, made him smile. He then reached his fingers to pull out a half hidden sheet of paper. It was a child's drawing. "Did Naomi draw this for you?" he asked softly, suddenly ashamed of his blatant prying as she stared at the picture, her eyes glistening for an instant.

"No, Rebi drew that." She replied, taking it from him carefully. "He discovered a talent for it. Azan preferred those building blocks Tom Paris introduced him to, Lego. I still have his model of Voyager somewhere. It's an awkward scale, but still remarkably accurate in some ways." Chakotay smiled at the pride in her voice, the Borg twins had always been hard for him to tell apart, but he knew that they'd been perfect individuals to Seven, as Mezotti had been also and Icheb still was. She breathed a thoughtful sigh, "You were right about letting them to have fun." She murmured nostalgically.

"You would've come to that conclusion yourself." Chakotay replied gently, "But I'm glad I could help." He'd by now spotted that well as keepsakes from Azan and Rebi, he could see pieces beaded jewellery Mezotti had loved to string together were also sprinkled around where they sat. Seven had let him into her sanctuary. He moved self-consciously away from the crate he was leaning on, suddenly very aware that these things were her belongings, all she had, but something about that particular battered crate tugged at his memory. "These…these are the boxes of what we salvaged from the Raven." He whispered in disbelief, "I sat here when I had to read their logs…"

"Yes, I suppose you did." Seven confirmed, sighing heavily.

Chakotay cringed, "I'm sorry I had to do that Seven, it was intrusive…"

"It was necessary." Seven retorted sharply, "Considering the situation, what I had done…"

"I never blamed you for going back, the Queen was blackmailing you." Chakotay assured her, his voice shaking with repressed emotion as he remembered the ordeal of reading through the Hansens' story. Doing so had been one of the Captain's most vehement orders, and he knew it had to be done, but he resented now the fact that after opening that can of worms by trying to benefit from the Hansens' tainted research, Kathryn had passed the buck of knowing the details of Annika's tragic last few days onto him. She wouldn't have been able to take the guilt, he knew.

"I allowed her to." Seven replied listlessly with a shrug of her shoulders, staring at the crate. "I haven't read those logs again, although apparently it would be therapeutic."

Recognising the well-intentioned pressure of the Captain and the Doctor both in those words and had to fight to neutralise his tone. "Only you can be the judge of that Seven." He took a deep breath, debating whether to take it a step further, "Your parents would understand your feelings, whatever they were. They loved you Seven."

Seven blinked at him, a grief tainted smile wobbling on her face. "I've come to the point where I can trust that yes…they did love me. I don't think I need to know anything else, not now."

Chakotay gazed at her, astounded by her maturity and humanity. It was more than most people possessed, let alone would reveal to another person. He impulsively reached for her, his gaze intensifying as he swallowed, ready to force out the question that had been haunting him since that morning. "Will…Will you be able to trust _me _again, after what I did?"

Seven was still for a moment, it was as if she'd stopped breathing, but then she surprised him by moving to kneel in front of him, their eyes level since he was still sitting. Slowly, she placed a hand lightly on each of his shoulders, he could feel them shaking. Then, she leaned forward and pressed her lips gently to his. It lasted barely a second before she pulled back, but it was no empty peck. It reminded his dazed mind more of the kiss of redemption and forgiveness offered at altars, representing angels.

Despite the brief contact, Seven found herself breathing hard as she was met with his burning, unreadable eyes, able to feel wetness dripping from her own. "If I didn't still trust…_love _you I would not be here now." She whispered honestly, "It is more likely that I do not trust myself with this situation, I've never…"

The unmistakable warmth of one of Chakotay's lithe arms tightening around her waist stopped her speaking, but it was his answering whisper that made her tears stop flowing. "I trust you with us." He murmured against her mouth before kissing her tenderly.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D I know many of you are waiting for updates to my other stories, especially 'The Gift' and I apologise for the delay, but now that I've finished this chapter I'll work on that. **


	36. Chapter 36

The kiss quickly intensified beyond its initial warm tenderness as they both surrendered to the depths of passion that their respective secrets, and then the icy shock of the whole truth, had held them back from embracing. Utterly accepting his experience, Seven let Chakotay lead the kiss at first, relaxing to the extent where, perhaps for the first time in her adult life, her mind was pleasantly empty of anything beyond emotion and sensation. Soon though, instinct pushed her past response into action and her arms coiled around his broad shoulders, her body curling closer into him to join her lips in the fiery heat of contact. Since every action denotes a reaction, and the couple were at that moment totally tied to the laws of physics as well as biology, Chakotay's eager, automatic, response was to encourage her further, his strong frame pressing into her until she, lost to reality in that moment, overbalanced and almost fell backwards onto the Cargo Bay floor. Only the grip of Chakotay's clinging arms stopped her from sliding beneath him entirely. Anxiously, one of his hands immediately moved to cradle the back of her head, his fingers embedding themselves in the silky golden crown of her hair even as desire retreated far enough from his dark eyes to allow a flash of panic as well as guilt. "Sorry, I'm sorry honey, that was my fault…" He muttered awkwardly, a hoarse, breathless chuckle riding the words.

A little clarity returned to Seven's mind as she braced her hands against the floor to right herself. "Maybe." She commented with a tiny, wry shake of her head as she mentally admitted that the near mishap had been as much her doing as his. The decidedly sheepish expression with which he looked down at her rendered his strong, handsome face almost boyish and brought a bubble of laughter rising up her throat along with one ludicrous thought; if this was what he was like now, how he had he reacted as a teenager if he'd ever been caught in an overly amorous situation? "I am undamaged." She assured him seriously, the tentative beginnings of a teasing smile pulling on her lips as she gazed up at him.

Chakotay's face brightened instantly, humour and mischievousness sparking in his eyes as he leaned into her. In that moment, he could see in those clear eyes of hers, incapable of real deception, glowing with steady, unwavering trust and he could truly believe in what she's told him of her feelings for him, whatever he'd done. "I'm glad to hear that." He murmured, his voice hitting a low timbre that induced a shiver up Seven's spine even as she smiled softly at the honesty she could hear in the words.

Seven nodded, her old shyness prickling at her for long enough to tempt her to lower her gaze, but she found herself captivated by the details of his face as she slowly recognised the open, undisguised love written there. It was as if they were trapped in a magnetic field and they were opposite poles, she couldn't turn away now, let alone want to. Her breath hitched in her throat as she carefully, as if reaching for a priceless treasure, raised her hands to his face, her fingers, human and cybernetic, splaying over his warm skin for a moment before she pulled him down for another kiss. This time was slower, more certain. Chakotay lavished time on her now, gently encouraging her to explore him as his hands began to move reassuring circles down her sides, pulling her towards his lap as they both heard the moan rising in his throat. She found her fingers roaming over his face as his hold on her tightened, finding the slight change in his skin as she traced the tattoo, following the fading roughness of the few, now drying, tears of relief she could feel on her own cheeks as well as his. The realisation finally brought her need of air out as a gasp and she buried her head in his shoulder, suddenly overwhelmed, as the kiss broke. This was real, true reality. She wasn't dreaming, the pain of the day before, and the uncertain days even before that, hadn't been forgotten, but it had been forgiven and they had moved past it, _loved_ despite all that. This was serious. Admittedly, it had never been casual in her heart, she realised that now, he hadn't been just her crewmate for a long time even before he'd trespassed on her fantasy, but now they were far beyond even preserving that façade for the sake of others. She could feel it, as the tension of hurt and fear had dissipated it had been replaced by another kind of tension altogether, perhaps even more potent. Restlessness was probably a better word for it; she'd seen it in Chakotay's darkened eyes too, restless desire that refused to submit to circumstance and propriety. When he'd returned her kiss just then, she'd known somehow that he'd quite happily hold her like this forever, and she'd irrationally wanted time to freeze. Feelings of that intensity weren't supposed to be confined within the limits of the Voyager command structure, even she, with her limited experience, knew that to try would be impossible. "What are we going to do now?" she whispered shakily, a chill of foreboding passing over her as she lifted her face up from the safety of his shoulder to call reality back into their world.

Chakotay's heavy sigh tickled the skin of her throat as he tried to control himself, his body felt like smouldering kindling, one move from her would send him over the edge into inferno. "Honestly?" He forced out huskily, allowing himself to place a soft but lingering kiss on the exposed part of her throat even as he cursed his current lack of self-control. "I have a few ideas right now…"

Seven stilled, since his lips had grazed a sensitive spot, but soon her anxiety came flooding back. "I was referring to…" She began weakly, "…what we're going to do about the crew?"

Chakotay's heart squeezed upon hearing the fear in her voice and that moment of empathy was enough to cool the desire and arousal pulsating through him to the point where he could reluctantly make a few centimetres of space between them and start to give an answer, "Seven…"

"I do not know how to communicate that our relationship has changed…" Seven interrupted faintly, "They…they will not understand why you would…" She trailed off, her voice catching as her gaze took on a vacant, trapped expression, a deer in highlights. "And the Captain, she will think it detrimental to Voyager's integration, we're being disruptive…" Her speech had quickened into near panic.

"Seven!" Chakotay cut her off firmly, grasping her shoulders to force her to focus on him. "We are _not _being disruptive!" His tone verged on an angry outburst and guilt radiated over him as Seven's face quivered, then withdrew into pensive stoicism. It wasn't her fault really, she'd been conditioned to consider the good of Voyager over her own feelings, to the point of martyrdom, and with the superhuman speed of her brain, she had considered possible future problems before he'd even moved past delight at the resolution of their personal one. Sometimes the brutal logic of her intelligence overwhelmed her without making room for anything else. "Listen to me Seven." He instructed her softly, "You're thinking the worst, and after all we've been through…" He sighed and she responded with measured nod of acknowledgement which led him to tuck his hand under her chin, "We're happy now aren't we sweetheart?"

"Yes." Seven replied resolutely, warming his heart with her complete lack of pause or preamble.

"Me too, and that's the main and only thing we should worry about, alright?" He assured her in a gentle murmur, reaching for her shaking hand, resting on his knee, a fond squeeze. "The crew will understand…" The remark that he didn't care what anyone thought at this point was on the tip of his tongue, but he doubted Seven would be comforted by that, to cast off those around her, her 'Collective', altogether, was a frightening and alien concept to her. "Some people might be surprised, but there's nothing wrong with that, we're just being honest and we have nothing to hide."

Seven absorbed these soothing, reasonable words for a few seconds before she swallowed bravely. "There will be a period of adaption, for all of us." She concluded slowly, unease tightening her mouth again as she added drily, "In my experience the Captain is more resistant to adaption that most. She will…resent that we, as part of her core group of officers, have hidden anything from her, let alone something of this…" She gave him a small smile, "…significance."

Chakotay sighed heavily, an unspoken concession that she had a point. "We haven't really _hidden _anything; we've barely revealed how we feel to each other…" He muttered, giving her a reassuring smile as she stiffened, "I'm not suggesting we hide from her now, I _want _everyone to know how I feel, but maybe we don't need to be exhibitionist right now either…"

Seven smirked at him tiredly, "I don't think either of us are exhibitionist by nature."

Chakotay chuckled in agreement, "What I meant was, we can have our privacy for a few more days at least." He relaxed as she let herself cuddle back into him and gave her forehead a tender kiss, "We haven't got used to being an 'us' yet, considering what's happened…" He paused thoughtfully, "We owe ourselves that before we think of anyone else surely?"

"For certain." Seven replied quietly, before looking up at him shyly, "I love you; therefore you are my first concern now, beyond duty."

"Since I love you too…" Chakotay murmured, pausing to give her a long kiss, "…then we really have nothing to worry about."

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D I'm pretty tired from studying, I hope it hasn't shown up too much in my writing, and since said studying has to continue I'm not sure how regular my updates for any story are going to be, but I'll try my best I promise! :)**


	37. Chapter 37

Seven of Nine released a long sigh as she re-entered Cargo Bay 2. She was tired, but surprisingly relaxed, considering the events of the last 24 hours. A smile curved gracefully over her face as she made her way slowly through the cavernous room, her legs still a little shaky from the adrenaline the day's periodic red alerts had sent surging through her that had cracked even her controlled exterior at times. The remnants of the picnic lunch which were still present near her private corner crystallising the memories attached to that meal; she held those recollections in her mind like priceless, irreplaceable gems. No matter that the meeting, she supposed Chakotay would be amenable to it being called a date now, had been cut short by Voyager's arrival at the Talaxian colony, they'd given each other what they needed, forgiveness and reassurance, if not what they wanted, which was the time to revel in their new trust.

Duty had called, or more accurately their Captain had ordered, and they'd risen as one from the blanket, disposed of the food and corked the cider, without many words being spoken. In fact, Seven had been bracing herself to slip back into professionalism, to call him Commander as they ran for the Bridge, but as she'd turned for the door, he'd spun her back into him with one, almost frivolous, flick of his arm, coiling it around her waist and capturing her mouth with his, snatching a kiss before pulling back reluctantly, like a man dying of thirst who'd only been allowed one sip of water, as the red glow of the alarms cast an eerie pallor his handsome face. "We'll be fine." He'd murmured as he'd felt her tense up at the delay, then as soon as she'd nodded, tilting her face towards his, he'd let her go and they'd headed off like the good crewmembers they were.

Her smile turned rueful as she remembered that parting reassurance. They _had _been fine, after a fraught day of negotiations, first with the fearful Talaxians and then their enemies as they fought to let Neelix's new friends stay on the asteroid they'd claimed as home. It appeared now that they'd been successful, and that made her exhaustion, building on the trauma of her near miss with emotional failsafe, somewhat worth it, even if it meant that her contact with Chakotay since it had all started had been limited to a few concerned glances while on the Bridge. Part of her was glad of that, the same part of her that instinctively realised he hadn't entirely been talking of the danger of duty when he'd reassured her. The shift in their relationship, how it had changed her perspective on her life here and how it was bound to alter her role within the crew and their view of her, was overwhelming. As always when faced with 'developments in her humanity', as the Captain called the fits of uncertainty and change Seven herself was tempted to refer to as crises, the prospect was both terrifying and mildly thrilling. She knew herself well enough, and obviously Chakotay did too, to realise that a break from being confronted with all this, even in the form of a threat that a red alert always heralded, was what was required to stop her being consumed by the fear of excess emotion that the Collective had branded into her soul.

With a shake of her head to try to dismiss this introspection, she began to carefully tidy their makeshift picnic area. On her knees she swept away any hint of food crumbs still lingering, emptying the basket she'd so fretfully prepared the day before into the room's disposal system before tenderly folding the blanket onto her knee as she perched on the edge of one of the containers they'd hidden behind, suddenly regretting her compulsive desire to clean. Was this what a relationship on Voyager was going to be like? Clearing away their intimacy to make room for duty? Chakotay had tried to lightly laugh away the interruption, but how much time were they really going to have? Life on the sole Federation ship in the Delta Quadrant, an unprotected island in a sea of hostility, was highly dangerous to say the least. What if he risked too much for her? She had been Borg; few hate filled victims of the Collective cared about her status as a _former _drone when they were bent on revenge. What if Chakotay was injured or _killed_ in the line of duty?

The painful sting of tears in her eyes brought her back out of her own dark imaginings. That's what they were, _imaginings_. She was speculating, conjuring up horrific scenarios just as Chakotay had told her not to. She loved him and could now trust that he loved her. As he'd said, they were happy right now, why was she worrying herself to tears?

The swoosh of the doors echoing behind her made her cringe guiltily, upset at the thought of Chakotay finding her like this. She was already too reliant on him for reassurance and didn't want him to think that she didn't believe in their relationship, that she was unstable. Spinning around, the blanket falling off her lap, she relaxed instantly when she saw Naomi standing just inside the threshold. "Naomi Wildman." She greeted her softly, hastily drawing her hand over her face before trying to smile at the young girl, surprised that she hadn't spoken immediately, Naomi tended to launch straight into conversation. "Is there something wrong?"

Naomi shook her head a little too hurriedly, her own smile fleeting even as she answered calmly, "No, I'm just a little bored, Mom's shift doesn't end for half an hour and Neelix is busy."

Seven's brow furrowed slightly as she stood up in one supple movement to approach her young friend. "Neelix too busy for you?" she asked carefully, watching Naomi's face intently, "That is highly unlikely."

Naomi smiled warmly, the tension in her small shoulders easing. "Yeah, but right now he's with Dexa and Brax, continuing to show them around the ship."

"You always like to help him with those tours." Seven reminded her, pausing before adding cautiously, "Don't you like Dexa and Brax?"

"Of course I do!" Naomi answered swiftly, "They're really nice, they're my friends too." She took a deep breath, "I just thought I'd better leave Neelix alone to have some time with them, since we'll be leaving soon…"

Seven subtly bent down to be closer to Naomi's height and eye level, "That's very considerate of you, although I firmly believe that they would not see your presence as an intrusion."

Naomi nodded gratefully, swiping her long strawberry blonde out of her eyes to look up at Seven, "I know that, it's just…" She blinked rapidly for a moment, "Neelix will be so sad when we leave them behind, he might never meet another Talaxian ever again…"

"The Talaxian people have been beset by tragedy." Seven admitted, "But Neelix, and all the people of that asteroid from what I've seen, have not allowed that to affect their happiness or optimism. The last thing Neelix would want is for you to be unhappy on his behalf, he's merely enjoying the presence of all of his friends while he can."

Naomi's smile came easier and stayed on her face. "Yeah, we're all together right now, that's good."

Seven could return the smile with genuine pleasure. She knew that Naomi, perhaps uniquely, shared her fear of returning to Earth, of the crew dispersing. Their lives were here, and Neelix was a large part of Naomi's. "Yes, it is good." She paused for a moment, wondering if she should confide an uncertain hope to the still little girl. "I believe I have found a way to keep Voyager and the asteroid in contact for many months, perhaps longer." She finally decided to reveal gently.

Naomi's face brightened, her relief vivid. "Really? Are you going to use the array we use to contact Earth?"

"Precisely." Seven confirmed, pleased by her correct deduction. "It is not guaranteed, but the Captain has given me permission to attempt to form a new comm. connection linking the asteroid to the array and thus to Voyager long range and the Federation." She gasped slightly as Naomi wrapped her in an impulsive, tight hug, but quickly relaxed, smiling down at her fondly as she tentatively returned the hug. "I need to report to Astrometrics and catalogue today's data from the Federation, arrange the comm. time, and then I will work on the link."

Naomi pulled back from her, "Can I help you do the cataloguing? You've let me before…"

Seven sighed wryly, "Yes I have, and I will now." She allowed, "But only until your mother comes off duty, you have your own homework to do remember."

Naomi laughed as she tugged Seven along by the hand, "You're the one who gives me most of the homework Seven, of course I'm going to do it!"

* * *

"Whose turn is it for comm. time today?" Naomi asked eagerly as they entered Astrometrics, standing right on the balls of her feet to be able to peer inquisitively at the console.

Seven cleared her throat awkwardly as she glanced down the comm. time allocation list while focusing most of her attention on activating the protocols she'd designed to decipher the encrypted information stream from Starfleet. "It appears to be my turn today."

Naomi's eyes widened a little, "Really? You're going to talk to your aunt?"

"She will be expecting me to contact her today, yes." Seven replied after a long pause, trying to ignore the nervous tightening in her chest.

Naomi, uncommonly perceptive after a lifetime surrounded by adults, patted Seven's metallic hand soothingly, "I'll go and wait for Mom then and you can talk to her." She said firmly, "You should have told me before Seven." She admonished her seriously, her young face earnest.

Seven shook her head, "No, my aunt would be upset to think that she is the reason you left." She countered before continuing thoughtfully, "I'm certain that she'd like to meet you, I talk about our activities, such as kadiskot, frequently in our conversations."

Naomi grinned at that, "You do?"

"You are my friend, why would I not talk about you?" Seven replied with an honesty that made Naomi's smile grow. She knew that all of the crew would help and protect her, but few would call her a friend as unaffectedly as Seven of Nine, who, as protective and maternal as she was, didn't seem to consider excluding her from things as most people did with a child. "The comm. link will be available in thirty seconds." Seven informed her companion calmly, focusing on the technical details in front of her rather than the looming conversation. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate her conversations with her aunt, they had always had a pleasant two minutes after Irene managed to allay the nerves and awkwardness that Seven still felt, although she resisted the feelings as irrational and unfair, towards the last living branch of her family.

"Okay." Naomi acknowledged, standing back from the console to gaze seriously up at the viewscreen, hands neatly by her side as her back straightened. Years of witnessing Voyager's diplomatic functions had sunk in to give the girl natural manners an ambassador would be proud to possess.

"Comm. link activated." Seven intoned, swallowing slightly as the viewscreen was covered with a layer of snowy static for a moment before her aunt's aged but familiar figure came into clear focus.

"Annika!" Irene always rendered her given name, which generally made Seven flinch, a pleasure to her ears. The joy and affection in her tone, twinned with her melodic Swedish accent, brought enough childhood memories flooding back to make Seven relax and return the older woman's eager, kindly smile. "I was hoping you'd be able to call today, how are you?"

"I am well Aunt Irene." Seven answered warmly. From her aunt's ears the 'how are you' seemed to stem from genuine concern rather than social convention. "I am sorry I was unable to contact you three weeks ago…" She began to apologise rapidly, her gaze dipping awkwardly.

"Don't worry Annika, you explained that in your letter and I understood." She regarded her niece affectionately, "It was very kind of you to let that poor Ensign who'd lost his brother have the extra comm. time with his family." She assured her softly.

Seven blushed a little, the compliment sitting uneasily with her under Naomi's curious glance. She'd broken regulations by giving Ensign Cho her comm. time, and she still felt a little guilty for putting Irene off, but her conscience had told her it was the right thing to do at the time. "This is Naomi Wildman." She introduced, changing the subject by indicating her companion in the room.

"Good afternoon Ms Hansen, it's very nice to meet you." Naomi said with solemn politeness, standing to attention.

"Please call me Irene dear, if I can call you Naomi?" When Naomi gave a giggling nod in reply to that, Irene's face softened further, leaning closer into her screen to address the little girl almost conspiratorially, "Annika has told me a lot about you, so you'll need to tell me a little something about her, when did she get the smart uniform?" She straightened up again to address her niece, "You really do look good in it my love, what brought on the change?"

Naomi's grin widened, although she tried to hide it from Seven with her hand, "I think Commander Chakotay got it for her, although everyone at the party a few nights ago says he likes her blue dress even more…"

"Oh?" Irene queried, unable to stop her eyebrows rising even as a smile pulled at her lips, "Does he now?"

"Naomi…" Seven intervened, stopping herself when she realised that her flustered tone was giving away more than the little girl ever could as Irene's smile grew.

"It's true Seven, you _know _it is." Naomi insisted, a teasing glint in her eye as if challenging her to deny it.

"Well…" Seven tried, quickly deciding not to make the hole being dug for her any bigger. At that moment the trill of Naomi's comm. badge seemed like a saving grace.

"Naomi, I'm finished in Engineering and I booked some holodeck time for us, come and meet me please." Samantha Wildman instructed her daughter through the line.

Seven allowed her lips to twitch in a brief smile as Naomi's face brightened further. Ensign Wildman must have had a similar idea to her, distract Naomi from fretting about Neelix. "I'm coming Mom." Naomi agreed swiftly, "Thank you for having me Seven." With Seven's simple nod of acknowledgement, she turned towards the door, remembering just in time to turn back to the viewscreen, "It was nice to meet you…Irene."

"You too dear." Irene replied warmly, a wistful, and somewhat saddened, smile passing over her face as Naomi bounded out.

"Aunt Irene?" Seven prompted her uncertainly as she saw the expression.

"Nothing min älskling…" Irene mumbled distractedly, her Swedish terms completely obvious to Seven's ears now that the comm. system no longer needed to translate for Naomi's sake, "She just reminds me of you, that's all."

"I will take that a compliment." Seven replied softly.

Irene just studied her for a moment thoughtfully before remembering how little time they had. "So…a man who _particularly_ notes how you dress?" she questioned cautiously.

"Yes." Seven admitted, concluding that there was no need to hide from someone thousands of lightyears away, "I suppose you could say Chakotay does that."

Irene gave her a gentle smirk in reply, "Among other things I hope?"

"We are growing very close." Seven conceded, flushing when she became aware of how much she was smiling, "I am…I believe _we _are happy, despite any complications."

"Complications?" Irene echoed uneasily, her delighted expression gradually turning to one of concern, like a changing tide. Hoping to God she wasn't prying, she tried her best to soften the worry in her tone, "Käresta, what kind of complications?"

Seven took a deep breath, feeling all of her fears surge to the tip of tongue even as her throat seemed to close up almost entirely. "Chakotay is the First Officer." She finally answered, thinking that that summed it up.

Irene obviously didn't understand, her face blank. "Yes, I know he is." She answered slowly, remembering as she did so seeing a picture of the very man in one of the reports about Voyager, he was very handsome. "Why is that a problem Anni?"

"It is entirely against regulations!" Seven answered, her voice choked with frustration and doubt, "It is considered disruptive to the chain of command, _dangerous_, for crewmembers to fraternise…"

Irene's frown deepened, and she held her hands up to stop her, "Wait, I thought two of your friends were _married_, aren't they about to have a baby?"

"They are of the same rank." Seven responded, neglecting to tell her aunt that even that, which some thought more permissible, had taken a long time to be acknowledged and that many of her crewmates had doubted Tom and B'Elanna for longer than they realised. With her enhanced hearing she could hear every whisper.

She now heard an audible 'humph' from the older woman, who was practically huffing with indignation as she crossed her arms over her chest, "What do Starfleet expect? For the poor man to be celibate for the rest of his life? You're living on a ship, not a monastery or a convent…" Her flow of exasperated incredulity slowed as she saw Seven's face flood with crimson, "Honestly Annika…" She began in a gentler, more considered tone, "You don't really think that you're expected to stand by that sort of regulation in Voyager's situation do you? _No one _could expect that, no even the Starfleet top brass whom everyone would like to keep at arm's length…" She shook her head, her voice cracking with emotion, "The reality is Annika, that you may be on that ship for fifty years or more, all any of you have is each other, as much as the families here still love you…" She sighed heavily, trying to collect herself, "You don't deserve to be alone, and neither does the Commander does he?"

Seven shook her head fiercely, "No, no, of course he doesn't." She forced out, blinking hard, but a single tear escaped and fell onto the console anyway. How close had she come to her worst fear coming true? Being alone and isolated forever as her aunt similarly seemed to fear for her? If she hadn't reached out to him that night in Sickbay… "I love him." She said suddenly, more to herself than to Irene and with as much conviction as she'd admitted to him earlier.

"I know." Irene told her, smiling in relief, "That fear you're feeling, for him more than for yourself, that just means your taking this seriously, but don't let it distract you either."

Seven laughed weakly, the sound struggling to leave her tight throat. "He told me already not to worry, to just let things be."

"See?" Irene demanded with a chuckle, her piercing blue gaze, a family trait, pinning her niece's attention, "He seems like a sensible man, a good one. You'll have to let me speak to him sometime."

"I will." Seven replied, overwhelmed by the fact the one other vote of confidence, added to Chakotay's, could help her so much. "We only have 15 seconds left." She muttered despondently, in the rare position, for her, of wishing a conversation could continue. "Thank you for talking to me Aunt Irene." Her voice was thick with gratitude and relief.

"I'm glad I could help you, really Annika." Irene replied, her own voice failing her for a moment before she decided to lighten the tone, "If the Commander is afraid of meeting me, remind him that it's only a two minute conversation, he's got a leg up on most boyfriends meeting the family."

Seven found herself laughing at that, although she didn't entirely grasp the reference, and Irene's replying laughter was the last sound she heard from her before the comm. cut out.

* * *

Chakotay felt his whole body lighten, some of the more troubling cares in his mind falling away as he finally entered Astrometrics. He felt that, as he stood admiring the serene sculpture that was Seven at work, waiting for her to notice him, Astrometrics was rapidly becoming one of his favourite places on the ship. This was ironic, considering that he'd been wary of it being built in the first place, much as he'd feared the drone who it represented. Against his will, as guilt mingled with his joy at being proved so wrong, the scorpion parable resounded in his head. No doubt the Captain would remind him of those words in the days to come, but he now felt able to respond to them. Yes, his father had advised him, being proven right can be satisfying, but discovering something new for yourself, even if it proves you completely wrong, can be life affirming, in the end you'll remember that discovery more clearly than anything that proved you right.

Seven's voice, he vaguely recalled finding it robotic in the past but now found it effortlessly seductive, pulled him out of his mental wanderings. "If you are here for my report on the link for the Talaxian colony, I have not completed it yet."

"Actually, I'd forgotten about that." Chakotay replied lightly as he walked to her side.

"I thought you may have, since you've been standing here for five minutes." Seven replied, letting him catch a smirk curve her lips without actually lifting her head up from the console, although unbeknownst to him she'd stopped working as soon as he'd entered, enjoying the anticipation of feeling his eyes on her.

"Oh…" Chakotay chuckled sheepishly, "I must've had my mind on other things." He turned his face in, so close to hers that when her head rose from the console their lips almost brushed together, before settling on exchanging a private smile, "How about you tell me your conclusions anyway Crewman, that is if you have any?"

Seven arched her eyebrows, not even bothering to confirm to him that of course she had conclusions. "I believe the link could be set up relatively easily, it would merely require some modifications to the colony's long range communications system."

Chakotay grinned at her, "Neelix will be happy to hear that, the Captain too." He drew himself closer to her by tentatively placing his hand on the small of her back, relishing the acceptance of the touch as she leaned into his palm like a cat. "I guess that means you'll be going on a short away mission to do those modifications for them…" He speculated, "Do you want me to offer my services as part of the away team?"

"As long as Lieutenant Paris pilots the shuttlecraft." Seven tossed back at him, her shoulders quivering with laughter when he sucked in a breath in mock offence.

"My record with Voyager's shuttles is just bad luck you know…" He tried to defend himself before giving in with a laugh, "Okay, Tom would pilot, but I could still come in some capacity…"

Seriousness dawned on Seven's face, "Perhaps we should rule ourselves out as away team members of each other's missions, it would reduce the possibility of conflict if one of us were endangered."

Chakotay's jaw locked, "If you were injured on a planet somewhere I'd make it my business to help you…" He sighed as he saw her point, such emotional decisions could jeopardise the whole crew. "Okay, I see your point with the away missions, but you're not still bringing my rank into this are you?" The hand that wasn't cradled in her back clenched fearfully as his side.

"No." Seven assured him softly, "I know it will never be irrelevant in our lives here, but I will not forsake you for the sake of protocol." She felt him exhale in relief and sighed guiltily, deciding to confide her fears of earlier in the day, "I was allowing the…obstacles in our path to preoccupy me somewhat…" Chakotay knew this was an understatement, "But I spoke to my aunt today and she reassured me as you did…" She trailed off as she belatedly realised that he might not be happy with her 'blabbing' their private concerns to anyone. "I am sorry if I broke your confidence by talking to her, it is our concern alone…"

"Seven." Chakotay interrupted her, both hands moving to grip her waist and turn her fully towards him, "I wouldn't stop you from talking to your aunt, about anything. I'm glad you have her now, that you can open up to her. I'm happy that you have someone outside this ship to talk to."

"I am too." Seven admitted, recalling how lonely she often felt even on a ship full of people. "She just reiterated what you said, in more colourful terms perhaps, that relationships _are _allowable and that happiness is all that is relevant."

"She sounds like a great aunt to have." Chakotay told her warmly, "How often do you talk to her? Is she really the only relation you have?"

"Aunt Irene and her two sons, my cousins, are my closest blood relations." Seven confirmed, "Her husband died many years ago. I have been talking to her when my comm. time allows, although today I had not spoken to her for six weeks…"

"What happened three weeks ago?"

Seven blanched a little, she hadn't intended to reveal that. "Ensign Cho had just heard about his brother's accident, I allocated him extra time on the comm. link to allow him to seek comfort from his family."

"I remember, I counselled him over the death. He wondered who the anonymous person was who gave him their comm. time…" Chakotay murmured in wonder, "Why didn't you say anything? He would've liked to thank you for that…"

"Thanks are irrelevant." Seven responded crisply, beginning to feel awkward about what she had done, "It was reasonable to give someone in that situation such consideration, and I knew I would be least affected by the loss, Irene understood…"

"It wasn't just _reasonable _Seven, it was very kind." Chakotay murmured in awe, although he knew he should have no longer been surprised by her doing such a thing. He was also a bit taken aback by her need to justify it. "It would be nice to let him thank you too."

Seven shifted uneasily from foot to foot, her gaze dropping. "He may not have accepted the consideration from _me_." She reminded him stiffly.

"That's not true Seven." Chakotay argued, saddened and frustrated by her reasoning, but her nod in acknowledgement was so small he knew he'd have to press his point another time. "Anyway, I really should've thought of doing something like that myself…"

"Why?" Seven questioned, "Don't you use your comm. time?"

Chakotay shrugged, "Not always." He admitted, "Honestly, I don't have many people to call, most of my Maquis friends are here with us."

Seven's brow furrowed, "Don't you have a sister?" she asked cautiously.

"I do, Sekaya, she's two years younger than me. We don't have much in common anymore though; it's easier to just write letters…" He trailed off, feeling guilty about telling _her_ this, who'd been denied family as close as parents, let alone siblings, for most of her life. He thought about repeating the excuses he'd been telling himself, that Sekaya lived on a remote colony so the comm. line was unreliable, that two minutes just wasn't long enough, but Seven's clear, concerned gaze drew the truth out from him. "Honestly, I'm not sure I want to talk to her, or her to me. We grew apart when I left for Starfleet and her for university, and then things got pretty…volatile between us after our father was killed. She never agreed with me joining the Maquis afterwards…"

"That is in the past." Seven intervened levelly, studying his face intently and trying her best to sort out in her mind what words she could say to counteract the conflicted, painful emotions scattered over his face. "I do not believe she would make any conversation tense at this point, not if she's anything like you." She breathed a smaller sigh that echoed his heavier one as she looked up at him, "You share a great deal of good memories that could make for a pleasant two minute conversation, I think today was the first time I really spoke to Irene about my life in the _present_, rather than the childhood she can recall for me."

Chakotay smiled at her affectionately, his fingers moving up to lightly trace the outline of her face, as if he were framing a mental portrait of her. "How did you end up so grounded?" he murmured.

Seven's mouth twisted doubtfully, "I think your data to draw that conclusion is erroneous Commander."

Chakotay gave his head a steady shake, "I don't think so somehow…" He argued with a chuckle.

For a moment Seven appeared confused, then exasperated by his incorrigibility, but she let a wry smile of acceptance tug at her lips as she leaned up and gave him a kiss, short and sweet.

Their lips broke and Seven was about to step back from him again, when his arms formed a looping barrier to stop her, holding her against him. "You know, at some point I'm going to kiss you first right?" he teased.

Seven's eyebrows shot up, this time almost reaching her hairline, as she pouted at him. "Nothing is stopping you now."

A laugh bubbled in Chakotay's chest but it was stifled by the soft moan as he did as she recommended and kissed her, with much more heat and depth than Seven had dared to risk at this moment. Still, the heat of it quickly made her melt into him, the hands that moved from her back to splay over her hips seeming to her as if that was the only thing holding her upright. Just as she was beginning to reciprocate fully however, curling her arms around his neck to bring him even closer, the blare of the ship wide comm. system, Captain Janeway's sombre voice hailing down on them like judgement from above, made them freeze and break it off. "Senior officers please report to the Briefing Room."

Chakotay's head dipped briefly onto Seven's shoulder as she reluctantly loosened her grip on him. "She really does have perfect timing doesn't she?" he muttered, the irritation he'd shaken off good-naturedly the day before now crystal clear.

Seven sighed as she let him go and headed with efficient steps towards the doors. "I now have one good reason to wish for Voyager's return to Earth." She remarked drily as he moved to follow her out.

**A/n: PLEASE REVIEW! :D I'm so sorry, again, for the lack of updates this week! This chapter has been a chore for me honestly, a lot of deletion and re-writing, which delayed me beyond my real life excuses, sigh. Don't worry, I have a clearer plan for the next chapter! Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed it. I put some Swedish phrases in for Irene once again, 'min älskling' means my darling and 'käresta' means sweetheart. **


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